50 Ridiculous Real-Life Stories People Could Have Sworn Were Fake, As Shared By “Sadly, This Is Not The Onion” Community

General Anaesthesia 3 years ago

A good friend shuts down Metastasis/Fecesbook.

23points

Bedlamite 3 years ago

Quit Facebook 2 years ago. Never been happier.

35points

Eric Mac Fadden 3 years ago

WhatsApp too

1point

Nitka Tsar 3 years ago

I can totally see that! Germany for example is nearly unavailable on Google street view, because people value their privacy so much here.

13points

Natalie Bohrteller 3 years ago

I think people in other countries value their privacy too, I guess we're just more suspicious.

11points

Colin Timp 3 years ago

They whine because they can't get away with the c**p they pull in the U.S. Privacy laws and anti- competitive behavior doesn't fly in Europe. Fines also don't wind up getting reduced by 95%.

11points

Kel_how 3 years ago

"Oh no, Mr. Zuckerberg, please don't leave! What peace and truth we would have again!"

11points

Pandalea 3 years ago

In French we'd say "Chiche!" ( Dare you!)

11points

Nicole Weymann 3 years ago

Hah! Now I know where "sheesh!" comes from! (maybe)

3points

loty moty 3 years ago

Chant on the streets: Do It, Do It...

11points

Jay Son 3 years ago

I quit them about three years ago, life's great!

5points

TheDivineMsM 3 years ago

Oh PLEASE close it down!! (Crosses fingers)

4points

JL 3 years ago

Can we get them to threaten the U.S. with the same thing, please?

2points

Redditor u/IndigoSoln, one of the moderators from r/nottheonion, was kind enough to share their thoughts about the subreddit, and the nature of modern news itself. They told Bored Panda that they personally weren't involved with the sub when it was founded all the way back in 2008, but they feel like a lot of change has occurred since then. Some of it's very obvious. Some—not so much.

"A lot of growth came from when the sub was one of the 'default' subreddits all users were automatically subscribed to when they joined. This lasted until 2017 with the rollout of a more discovery-oriented onboarding. However, by then, we were firmly in a depressing new era of onion satire," the mod said.

"The election and administration of Donald Trump, a walking SNL skit and personification of 'failed business mogul,' was the point things started going off the rails. There was rarely a day when there wasn't a news story breaking some outlandish and ridiculous stunt you wouldn't dare imagine really happening. The president serving a championship sports team fast food? Using a sharpie to 'correct' a weather map? What kind of mad world is this?"

#2

A Zoo Has Been Trying To Get Two Pandas To Mate For 10 Years. When Coronavirus Shut The Zoo Down, The Pandas Finally Did

Final score:

477points

POST

loty moty 3 years ago

And we find out yet again that people are the real problem

373points

Kookamunga 3 years ago

I'm trying to get my panda on, a little privacy, please?

51points

Kitty Purry 3 years ago

Amen

8points

v 3 years ago

I often wonder if I will live to see the day that we, as the true problem, are addressed directly. All my life it's been one version of "If we do this thing, we can forestall that outcome." and none of them truly address the root of the problem. What's worse is that the various band-aids that simply cover the problem give society the false belief that the world can simply keep absorbing more people will no ill effects.

1point

Don't you wish you knew 3 years ago

That's just kinda sad. They never had enough privacy. Poor things. I know zoos sometimes so good things but I'm not a fan.

51points

Minath 3 years ago

Apparently, zoos all over the world have observed more mating behaviour since the lockdowns started. Shows the effects of being on show has on animal behaviour.

44points

Thee8thsense 3 years ago

All we needed was a little privacy, and voila! We make the love...

22points

Lynda Birch 3 years ago

This ain't no peep show

15points

TheContrarian 3 years ago

The Alternative Explanatiin 2010: "I wouldn't touch you with a ten foot pole" 2015: "Stop asking. If I haven't killed you first, I'll have sex with you in 5 years." 2020: "Okay, promise is a promise. Let's go"

12points

Jason Marin 3 years ago

Guess the pandas didn't like having an audience.

9points

JL 3 years ago

And they were no longer bored...

4points

Draperdorf 3 years ago

A little privacy please people!!! - the pandas.

9points

Rose the Cook 3 years ago

Pandas like privacy so beat it you perverts!

7points

JL 3 years ago

"There's something I'd like to ask you, but I wanted to wait until we were alone..."

4points

#3

People No Longer Believe Working Hard Will Lead To A Better Life, Survey Shows

Final score:

469points

POST

Lauren Copland 3 years ago

Surveyers completely understand people.

190points

Nicole Weymann 3 years ago

...and people understand how companies work. Work harder > get more work AND get bullied if you cut down to 100% instead of the now expected 120%. What you give for free (your time and work in this case) people (here aka companies/bosses) take for granted and demand it as a right.

47points

Arliss Speace 3 years ago

There is a song called "Boney Fingers". The chorus is: "Work your fingers to the bone and what do you get? ...Boney Fingers."

12points

Faramir10 3 years ago

Good song.

1point

Pamela Worthington-Smack 3 years ago (edited)

Nonsense. As an American, I can tell you with complete confidence that keeping your head down, working hard, and playing by the rules leads to a perfectly marvelous life for 1% of citizens. Their godlike power and standard of living are like nothing else in all of human history. Corporate neofeudalism's ability to improve the lives of those whom it supports makes the scope, power, and resources of a God Emperor look like those of a traffic cop. ¶ Never has a government so well served those who pay to put and keep its officials in power. No dog is as loyal as a legally purchased member of the US Congress.

7points

Serial pacifist 3 years ago

Oh my God, such a shocker

7points

Tristan J 3 years ago

You load sixteen tons, and what do you get, another day older and deeper in debt. Saint Peter don't you call me 'cause I can't go; I owe my soul to the company store.

6points

Kimber Pritty 3 years ago

Tristan J, "Sixteen Tons" Miles Travis 1946 ... and it only took 76 years to sink in!

0points

Don't you wish you knew 3 years ago (edited)

Well that is true. Not very hard to believe this one.

5points

Yubo 3 years ago (edited)

I've worked 2-3 jobs most my life and got no where. I finally stopped working extra jobs in my 40's. I'm now in my 50's and I still don't have a "better life". But I am happy that I have roof over my head, food to eat, money to pay the bills and a family that loves me. Now that I've read all that.....maybe I do have the BEST LIFE!

4points

Paul Neff 3 years ago

Supported by evidence.

4points

gerard julien 3 years ago

"EVERYBODY'S GOT TO BELIEVE IN SOMETHING ! I BELIEVE I'LL HAVE ANOTHER BEER ! " W.C. FIELDS

4points

Enlee Jones 3 years ago

Remember kids, if you work really hard your boss can upgrade his Mercedes.

3points

People resonate with the content shared on the subreddit for a number of reasons. Some enjoy it because, at some point in their lives, they've probably felt that reality really was stranger than fiction. "For some, you just need to put the craziness down on paper to really make sense of it in a 'are you seeing this [crap]?' sort of way. For those with a darker [sense of] humor, it helps them laugh at the situation and deal with the helplessness," the mod explained.

"This growth in relevancy and political nature in the most hitting posts has come with a few challenges. With the polarization of opinions comes the insatiable itch to debate and argue every angle in the comments with extreme prejudice. Sometimes, this subreddit feels less like a humor sub with a dash of politics than a politics sub with a dash of humor given the intensity of things. Things have gotten so sour that we've turned to only allowing select posts on Donald Trump since we were guaranteed a rough day when one of those were allowed to grow, reach r/all, and bring in people from Reddit's front page looking for an argument."

The moderator said that the sub is an interesting place "where we've been called Nazis and the day's flavor of 'liberal'/'republican' from both sides for trying to keep the peace and maintain a somewhat respectful atmosphere."

#4

Coronavirus Homeschooling: 77 Percent Of Parents Agree Teachers Should Be Paid More After Teaching Own Kids, Study Says

Final score:

461points

POST

Gul Dukat 3 years ago

No kidding!

156points

IsItNapTimeYet 3 years ago

I could have told you this headline before the pandemic. I would never have the patience to be a teacher. I do not homeschool for a reason. I would work my nursing job seven days straight before stepping in front of a classroom. Bless teachers!

30points

BeanieBee 3 years ago

Thank you very much! I'm a SpEd teacher.

8points

General Anaesthesia 3 years ago

Teachers in unison, "put your money where your mouth is, people".

17points

Draperdorf 3 years ago

Yup, Teachers, nurses, paramedics, carers, fire crews etc etc. I'm looking at you footballers and 15 minute of fame milkers.

14points

Bobby 3 years ago (edited)

My biggest frustration with the remote schooling was that the whole system was thrown together with bubblegum and dreams. The teachers werent adequately prepared and that wasn't their fault. While we were dealing with being locked down they were trying to teach with a system they only had days to get familiar with themselves

13points

DelvianBlue 3 years ago

This is true. When we went into lockdown in my state, we were told on Thursday. We had Friday to get materials together and prepare the kids, and we went online Monday. Very little time to suddenly convert all lesson plans to online format and teach online courses using video software I did not know existed the previous Monday.

7points

madbakes 3 years ago

They thought this for awhile. Now dumbasses are treating teachers like s**t again.

12points

Righteous Fart Box 3 years ago

Neat. Yet, they are not being paid more, and likely won't be paid more, and will likely have to absorb the burden of others leaving the profession compounded by the fact that fewer and fewer are interested in becoming teachers. Solid meme, though, or whatever.

6points

Kel_how 3 years ago

Please tell me the woman in the photo didn't continue the hideous tradition of teaching the recorder!? 😉

6points

madbakes 3 years ago

Oh I hear them in my neighborhood regularly

2points

C C 3 years ago

We're still waiting...

2points

David H 3 years ago (edited)

depends where you live. Where I live teachers are paid 57K a year right out of college, 180 school days a year, of 5.5 hours of classroom instruction a day (on top of home prep, etc). Tenure after 3 years. Eligible to Retire after 25 years with 50% pay, which maxes out at 22 years working at 117k a year (so when retired$58,500 a year for life). That is on top of the benefits package. Considering the city I live in has 1/3 of public school students graduate HS on a 6th grade or lower reading level, and 55% of 8th graders fail their max exams but still get into High School. I think for the job they do, they are paid well enough in my city.

2points

#5

Hunter Dies After Shot Elephant Falls On Him

Final score:

447points

POST

Lynda Birch 3 years ago

Karma's a biatch

311points

Jonathan 3 years ago

Karma be kool

28points

TheDivineMsM 3 years ago

Only karma if the elephant wasn't hit and is ok.

14points

Bob D. Lin Quint 3 years ago

He lived to 51 as a professional big game hunter. That's not karma

3points

Stannous Flouride 3 years ago

Karma's a pachyderm in this case/

1point

Marnie 3 years ago

Sometimes big game hunters help maintain wildlife populations, ironically. There is a very good Radiolab podcast about it.

0points

v 3 years ago (edited)

HOW DARE YOU!! You said something true that is, unfortunately, disagreeable with and non-supportive of the narrative at hand so you must now be canceled for no good reason.

5points

YourSecretSanta 3 years ago

My city finally features on BP, and it's because justice was rightfully served. This is good

39points

Mark Fuller 3 years ago

The elephant did not "fall". It deliberately sat down to squash this prat to death.

28points

DforDory 3 years ago

Instant karma!

19points

Gul Dukat 3 years ago

Karma is an elephant sometimes

13points

Seonag Udell 3 years ago

Love a happy ending

12points

Voit 3 years ago

But is the elephant ok?

10points

Thee8thsense 3 years ago

Smacked down by the Pachyderm! Yay!

9points

Nikkie de Beer 3 years ago

Wow, never thought I would read on PB about someone I knew personally, from my hometown...

7points

Katie Lutesinger 3 years ago (edited)

Serves you right!

7points

Katie Lutesinger 3 years ago

I originally said "And nothing of value was lost", but then I remembered the poor elephant. :(

8points

#6

Two Denver Police Officers Suspended For Using Violence On Nonviolent People During Protests Against Police Violence

Final score:

416points

POST

Daniel Yamada 3 years ago

How to make a police officer in the USA: Hire a dull axe and shape it into a hammer.

169points

Eff the haters 3 years ago

I can't reply to brivid, but damn, I need to rewatch that show

3points

Yubo 3 years ago

I've meet and have gotten to known some really great police officers here in the US. It's unfortunate how "one bad apple ruins the whole barrel".

22points

GoGoPDX 3 years ago (edited)

Well, a lot if those really great officers turn blind eyes to the really bad ones, which makes them not so great themselves. The thing about bad apples is they can easily ruin the whole bunch of good apples if that bad one is not removed.

26points

v 3 years ago

The one bad apple ruins the whole barrel because all the good apples would rather close ranks around the bad apple, protecting its position within the barrel, instead of getting rid of the bad apple. The message that those against BLM choose not to see or even attempt to understand if they do see it, is that there is nobody who wants any police force dismantled or de-funded. All they want is for the nations police forces to actually be the honorable institutions they claim to be.

4points

Bored Raven 3 years ago

Ya ya. One bad apple blah. It’s up to the other apples to fix the orchard.

3points

Maisey Myles 3 years ago

We're not talking about 1 apple- there are bushels

2points

Hobby Hopper 3 years ago

Unfortunately, it's become so polarized. Yes, I do think institutionalized racism is real, that BLM is an important movement that needs to exist, that police officers do brutalize and murder people, especially black, indigenous, and people of color. But I also think police are necessary and the majority are putting themselves on the line to "serve and protect". I'm not 100% convinced that "de-funding" them is the answer (maybe money for hiring better talent and better training is exactly what's needed?). I definitely think police forces need to be less militaristic though. The point is it's complicated, and yet public opinion doesn't seem to allow for any nuance or balance. You've got to jump on one bandwagon or the other, pick a side. Also, before anyone starts saying how stupid and ignorant I am, yes, none of this is said with any kind of authority, just an off-the-cuff outsiders take on things. I'd be happy to learn more from knowledgeable insiders on all sides of the issue.

0points

2econdSelf 3 years ago

Thank you very much. My life was literally saved by a U.S. police officer, and I also know many personally who are all outstanding men and women. The good ones don't get the press, and that's just not fair. Makes it look to the rest of the world (and plenty of Americans) that all cops are bad, and that's a shame. I support the blue.

-1point

Isabella Minter 3 years ago

not all police are bad, but for some reason people treat all of them like they would kill someone for doing nothing. it's like saying all celebrities are bad, or all teachers are bad. most of them truly just want to serve the country and protect people.

11points

Michael Largey 3 years ago

Would you fly on an airline that said this? : "Most of our pilots are great. We've got just a very few bad apples that like to fly their planes into mountains. The rest truly want you to have a great flight."

16points

Terran 3 years ago

Because the police is an institution and repeated failure of members of an institution and failure to recognise said problems within the institution, will fall back on that institution.

7points

iblewsheep 3 years ago (edited)

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

OwenHasADHD 3 years ago

When did anyone say all of them are bad?

1point

Daniel Yamada 3 years ago

Try this: Do a Google search for “US Court OKs Barring Smart People From Becoming Cops".

9points

Remi (He/Him) 3 years ago

OMG

3points

Ember 3 years ago

Oh the irony….

5points

over it already 3 years ago

'murica

5points

Colin Timp 3 years ago

"Suspended." Not arrested, not fired. Probably also suspended WITH pay.

4points

Pamela Worthington-Smack 3 years ago

How many turds do you have to remove from a punch bowl before it ceases to be a toilet? ¶ There are systems so intrinsically corrupt in their basic principles that they can't be improved, only shut down and replaced. Software developers do it all the time.

4points

Leo Domitrix 3 years ago

Police recruitment posters: "Got PTSD or psychosis? Need violence to live? F*ck the military, come be a cop!"

2points

William Mclaurin 3 years ago

F**k the police

1point

The reason why clickbait is so widespread, according to moderator u/IndigoSoln, is because news consumption has "dramatically shifted away from reputable sources such as newspapers and towards less than reputable sources, such as Facebook pages, random uninformed influencers, and other people willing to sacrifice their integrity for a little more attention. From there, it's become an 'adapt or die' sort of thing." They added: "Lucky for us, onionness regards the entirety of the article and not just the fluff title."

According to the mod, good news is far less interesting than bad news because the former usually means that, well, nothing really happened today. "There's a reason filler pieces are often good news stories. There's nothing to glean from this news other than status quo. What people are really interested in change and how it is relevant," they said.

Meanwhile, Professor McLendon, from the University of Kansas, gave Bored Panda her take on this: "I think people are drawn to things out of the ordinary, and often out of the ordinary also happens to be negative. They say 'no one ever writes about the plane that doesn’t crash' because planes normally don’t crash, so when one does, it’s newsworthy."

#7

Hiker Lost On Mountain For 24 Hours Ignored Calls From Rescuers Because He Didn’t Recognize Phone Number

Final score:

393points

POST

Lauren Copland 3 years ago

Atleast he's well educated about stranger danger!

183points

Linus G. 3 years ago

More like "Ranger Danger."

15points

Serial pacifist 3 years ago

Darwin awards eternal laureate

46points

Yay Pandas! 3 years ago

Pretty much what I was going to say.

2points

Lou 3 years ago

Your village called. They want their idiot back.

37points

Kookamunga 3 years ago

"Uh, dude, you need to text me." Perhaps introverts shouldn't hike solo.

17points

Chich Premium 3 years ago

I don't answer if I don't know the number but I sure as hell would if I was lost in the boonies. This guy needs to give his head shake.

26points

Susanne B 3 years ago

Do you think that would help?

0points

Fluffy mommy panda 3 years ago

If they could get a hold of them on his cell phone......why didn't he call someone to come help him? Lol. And if I was lost somewhere in the mountains I'd be answering my phone no matter who called.

20points

Susanne B 3 years ago

Anybody with an IQ of more than 90 would

0points

over it already 3 years ago

I have seen this several times and always wondered...did they not leave a message? Like, assume it's spam unless they leave a message seems almost reasonable. Maybe not in this situation, but...

18points

Beck 3 years ago

I do not know how to check my messages. I haven t checked them in 2 years. Apparently my mailbox never fills.up.

3points

Victoria Anderson 3 years ago

This sounds like me. But if it's a contact or they call 2 or 3 times in a row, I'll pick up just to say, "You better be with the search and rescue."

11points

General Anaesthesia 3 years ago

Would he have answered if he knew he was lost?

9points

Katy McMouse Premium 3 years ago

I saw this caption on the home page. Twice I read Hitler, not hiker. I'm beginning to think that my brain really likes to futz with me.

6points

Catlover129 3 years ago

Reminds me of a joke from years ago ... A man is stranded alone on a desert island. Prays to God for help and rescue. A boat and a sea plane come by and offer help. He refuses both, saying "God will help me". He finally starves to death, meets up with God. God says, "I sent a boat and a plane in answer to your prayers, you idiot!"

4points

#8

Parents Want High School Principal Removed For Listening To Iron Maiden; Students Rally Behind Her

Final score:

390points

POST

Gul Dukat 3 years ago (edited)

Should have read „Parents run to the hills out of fear of the high school principal; students prefer running free”

227points

KombatBunni 3 years ago

Sounds like aces high to me..

20points

Anya 3 years ago

Wasted years, that’s what time in this high school is without that principal

12points

Josh Tall 3 years ago

if you're gonna die....die with your boots on!!!!

7points

John Carr 3 years ago

I love you! Up The Irons \m/

4points

Svenne O'Lotta 3 years ago

I didn't know Cardassians understood poetry

4points

Kenneth McCartney 3 years ago

I'm losfer words..

3points

Destini Mattocks 2 years ago (edited)

Oh, The Evil That Men Do....

0points

Tamra 3 years ago

Jesus Christ, some parents need to chill the f**k out. There are real problems in the world, people. Your kid's principal listening to Iron Maiden ain't one of em.

57points

Leo Domitrix 3 years ago

Seriously, they're worried about the music taste of the teacher? Have they *heard* some of the sh*t out there? "Stand By your Man" by Tammy Wynette is way worse than metal!

31points

Virgil Blue 3 years ago (edited)

I went to an IM concert with a friend who was a real fan and the most hilarious thing was seeing people in expensive 3 piece suits driving beamers hurriedly changing into jeans and IM shirts etc. In the car park They were also the ones who went absolutely monkey poo during the concert.

24points

KombatBunni 3 years ago

Hahaha monkey poo 🤣 I love it! When I saw IM back in 2008, I took along a friend who was very much christian, and he absolutely loved it :) who would have thought eh?

8points

Kate Jones 3 years ago

Oh are we back to this? Thinking people who listen to metal are Satan worshipers? What the hell? The need for nostalgia is getting out of hand. First we go back to no abortion rights, then we have the SCOTUS mentioning witches in a ruling, then banning books, and now music is evil. What freaking year is this?

19points

Tamra 3 years ago

There should be a new astrological calendar made...we could call this the Year of the F**k wit. Mascot: a politician.

10points

Katy McMouse Premium 3 years ago

People are stupid.

9points

Sandra Sheehan 3 years ago

OMG. Parents move on from this small stuff. Worry more about the generation of everyone gets a trophy nonsense.

8points

Monday 3 years ago

Why? That generation entered the workforce a long time ago. Most of them are parents by now.

16points

Dre Mosley 3 years ago

As a big Maiden fan, I support this teacher.

5points

Deborah Harris 3 years ago

Three guesses what her new nickname will be 😄

5points

Eric Mac Fadden 3 years ago

When they learn about a certain poem from Samuel Taylor Coleridge is a 13 minute long heavy metal epic...

4points

martin734 Premium 3 years ago

That could be used to describe a lot of Coleridge's poetry. A lot of his works were written while he was completely off his t*ts on Laudanum and Opium.

1point

#9

Hulu To ‘Parasite’ Haters: ‘If You Don’t Want To Read Subtitles,’ Learn Korean

Final score:

389points

POST

Brooke May 3 years ago

I am a native English speaker and watch everything with subtitles. Apparently it is quite common for Autistic people to prefer it. Both of my kids prefer it also (one ASD one NT)

16points

Jaya 3 years ago

There appear to be some links between autism and hearing problems. So that might be the reason?

5points

Lucas 3 years ago

Sometimes it's just helpful anyway! Loud music, fast speaking and sometimes the actors pretty much mumble. Often have popped on the subtitles as backup!!

2points

HarperTheCentaur (they/them) 3 years ago

Yep! Both ADHD and autism are associated with a condition called Auditory Processing Disorder, which doesn't affect hearing itself but rather the brain's ability to translate auditory input to words. (It's been jokingly described as "ear dyslexia" and, yeah, that's pretty much what it is) A lot of people don't realize they have it because it doesn't show up on standard hearing tests, which only measure whether you can hear something and not whether you can understand it.

2points

Autistic apricot 3 years ago

Is it? Bcs I only watch with subtitles

1point

Wysteria_Rose 3 years ago

I would rather read a whole movie of subtitles than watch the horribly dubbed versions...

15points

Lucas 3 years ago

Those with dyslexia get stuck with the dubbed versions sadly - subtitles can be problematic.

5points

Colin Timp 3 years ago

My son loves Japanese anime and insists on watching the Japanese version with English subtitles. The dubs are so often terrible.

0points

3 years ago

I know, right! Especially when the voice does not fit the actor

0points

Shane S 3 years ago

Yes!

0points

Jay Son 3 years ago

Subs should be the standard. I hate it when I want to watch a foreign movie, only to find out only dubbed audio is available. Give me the language it was made in!

11points

Terran 3 years ago

Oh no. The pure Americans have to read subtitles like the rest of the world for once. That's of course unacceptable! Quick do something! /s

7points

Bored_Panda 3 years ago (edited)

That's not right. I got introduced to a lot of amazing shows by realising that I don't only have to watch shows in english

6points

Fraxinus excelsior 3 years ago

I know people that won't watch a foreign film because of subtitles

5points

Ren Karlej 3 years ago

They might be dyslexic perhaps? Some people can have milder forms and many aren't diagnosed. My brother had no idea until he was in his 40s and that was only diagnosed due to a persistent girlfriend who had family with the condition.

5points

Loki’s Lil Butter Knife 3 years ago

That’s a real shame. They are missing out on some wonderful shows and the opportunity to learn more about different cultures and people.

4points

Arliss Speace 3 years ago (edited)

I've known people that would not watch black and white films. Or letterbox format. Oof!

1point

Susanne B 3 years ago

It is a pity that so many people are so bad at reading, that subtitles pose a problem. Personally I need them because my hearing is not what it used to be now that I have passed 65.

0points

Colin Timp 3 years ago

I love subtitles. It's amazing how much you miss. Especially nowadays where the action is so loud that if you have your TV at a reasonable volume you can't hear the dialogue.

3points

Pamela Worthington-Smack 3 years ago

One of the things we learned in 2020 is that approximately 30% of Americans are afraid of pretty much everything, and consequently not only hate, but actively seek to destroy anyone who isn't just like them. The great irony is of course that the more they succeed, the more they have to discriminate to go on creating "us" and "them." If Americans removed all people of color from the face of the earth, we'd begin killing each other over the difference between beige and blush.

2points

Susanne B 3 years ago

Blondes, Redheads etc.

0points

Lou Cam 3 years ago

I always watch TV with subtitles so I don't miss what the characters are saying. In foreign language films and TV, I don't even notice I'm reading the words, my brain is playing it as if I'm understanding the dialogue. I just can't stand dubbed versions as that's like having someone sat behind you with a silly voice reading the subtitles right in your ear. Very jarring.

2points

Cammy Cat 3 years ago

Or don't watch it! I have no issue with subtitles. I actually watch tv with close captioning on everything. I find I understand everything better because of volume changes, accents, etc.

1point

As for the reason why clickbait is so widespread, it's because it works. Clickbait headlines are used because internet users click on them. "I’ve noticed shifts, though, as people catch on. You used to see all sorts of, 'You’ll never believe what happened next!' headlines—less from legitimate news outlets and more from 'content' sites—but when you read the article, you found that it was not unbelievable at all. People like to be informed, and they like to be surprised, so we’ll probably always have some sort of clickbait," the professor shared her thoughts with Bored Panda.

Professor McLendon was also kind enough to share her thoughts about the things that lie at the core of quality journalism and what those in the profession can do to improve the quality of their work.

"Accurate information is at the core of quality journalism. Legitimate news outlets figure out what’s happening, check the facts, get multiple sources, and present the news to their audience in a clear, informative way. But there’s always room for improvement," she said.

"Big picture, journalism could often be improved by ensuring sources from all sides of an event are represented. For example, a lot of political coverage is one side vs. another side with the people who are affected by decisions left out. Small picture, good editing is always important. Clarity and accuracy help readers understand and boost journalists’ credibility."

#10

Woman Named Marijuana Pepsi, Who Refused To Change Her Name, Earns Her Ph.d After Completing Dissertation On Black Names

Final score:

362points

POST

OmBoyGanesh 3 years ago

Marijuana Pepsi Jackson (now, VanDyck)! She’s a sociologist hero of mine. Her thesis subject: “Black names in white classrooms: Teacher behaviors and student perceptions”. She’s got some amazing insight into the history of black naming conventions.

240points

IDGAFabtyourfeelings 3 years ago

Is that even black or just random? I recall reading something abt how the EU does not allow parents to name their kids where it can humiliating. Marijuana Pepsi isn't black. There are legit African names.

11points

TeenieMeanie 3 years ago

I’ll have to give a read. Check out Freakanomics by Levin and Dubner. They have an interesting chapter on names.

10points

3 Owls In A Coat 3 years ago

I want to read it but I could only find a preview of it!

2points

Pandasaur 3 years ago

wow!

1point

Svenne O'Lotta 3 years ago

That's Dr. Marijuana Pepsi to you

42points

Sleeping Solipsist 3 years ago

"Fork" yeah!! Good point!!

4points

Sarah K 3 years ago

"Substitute teacher" by key and peele is one of the funniest skits ever and highlights the culture of black names

20points

Da Dragon Queen 3 years ago (edited)

A-A-RON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

11points

Marette 3 years ago

Read her Bio. Interesting that she fully embraces her name & credits it for making her a strong & successful woman, yet advises against anyone else using it for their child 🤔

19points

Draperdorf 3 years ago

I think she's saying that she has chosen to embrace her name, but that doesn't mean having it has come as easily as if she were named more blandly. So, maybe suggesting you don't name your child a name which just by the essence of having such a name, will mean they have to address situations that wouldn't ever arise if they weren't named like that?

41points

Kali Chaos 3 years ago

I went to school with a chick named Marijuana Carolina Chevrolet Jackson.

11points

Kookamunga 3 years ago

Wow! I went to school with a girl named Angel Dust Michigan Honda Johnson.

10points

Pascale Pierloot 3 years ago

Her brother's name is Weed 7Up. 😜

9points

Felix Grace 3 years ago

hmm. I was thinking maybe spice mtn dew

2points

Beck 3 years ago

I would just got by mary jane.

7points

Gul Dukat 3 years ago

Well, she is an expert on that topic!

7points

Paul Werner 3 years ago

Do you have any marijuana in this vehicle? Just one

4points

AlanandLeila Hoyt 3 years ago

I still don’t get why people judge kids for a choice their parents made…a name is a name. She sounds like a confident person!

3points

#11

First Patient To Communicate Via Brain Implant Asks To Hear Tool Album

Final score:

343points

POST

Kitti B. 3 years ago

Of course! They are amazing!

95points

I'm done 3 years ago

Pneuma!

5points

CultOfBambi 3 years ago

Their music is amazing - but sadly it seems at least one of them is a predatory douchebag.

1point

Lady Z Azrael 3 years ago

I prefer Puscifer personally. But love anything with Maynard

1point

XenoMurph 3 years ago

Surgeon hears "Such a Tool!" and immediately makes up story to cover the insult.

16points

Dan 3 years ago

He asked for them to play it loud, too.

12points

erinmophila_gibsonii 3 years ago

Aenima is one of the best albums ever made 😇

11points

2econdSelf 3 years ago

It certainly is, but I'd personally be concerned with having a request for Aenima being confused with an enema in a medical setting ;)

3points

Forrest Browne 3 years ago

his first message was actually "I Love My Cool Son" not about listening to tool.

9points

Anita Pickle 3 years ago

He also asked for a beer.

8points

LapCat 3 years ago

Tool? HELL YEAH BROTHER

4points

R F. 3 years ago

Please pass this on to Maynard and the fellas!

3points

Sarah Matt 3 years ago

This actually f*****g happened. No joke this is true.

2points

Righteous Fart Box 3 years ago

No they f*****g did not.

1point

#12

Poll: 80% Of Voters Think The U.S. Is Spiraling Out Of Control

Final score:

341points

POST

M Kawai 3 years ago

Only 80?

213points

Monday 3 years ago

well 19% of people were too lazy to complete the poll and the other 1% are just dumb

57points

Joshua Moore Premium 3 years ago

I was going to reply with something close to what Monday said, but I was going to say, the remaining 20% have their head up a certain body cavity and don't know what the hell is going on.

8points

Heather Menard 3 years ago

The other 20 are the rich getting richer

4points

Sawyer is watching 3 years ago

The rest think it America is going straight down instead of spiraling

3points

Earl Grey 3 years ago

Only just now?

3points

Your Average Panda 3 years ago

The other 20% couldn't make it to the poll, they were stuck under their rocks.

2points

Stephen Smith 3 years ago

yes.. 20% said what's voting?

1point

SabbeRubbish 3 years ago (edited)

Of voters...

1point

Mykidsartrocks 3 years ago

The other 20% are the politicians and their families.

1point

Nonna_SoF 3 years ago

The other 20 see it more as a controlled demolition of an occupied structure. Well the people rigging the charges talk about how we're going to the moon.

1point

im under ur bed hon 3 years ago

Don’t forget the Trump supporters.

0points

Riley Quinn 3 years ago

The other 20% comprised of radical Republicans.

0points

Kalevra 3 years ago

The other 20% are full on conservative bible thumpers.

0points

Carolyn Risling 3 years ago

Yeah . . . . .feels like more, doesn't it?

0points

Leo Domitrix 3 years ago

Both sides think the other side is the side "out of control". *sigh*

14points

Sheila Weila 3 years ago

That's because both sides live in echo chambers and only listen to people they agree with. They don't listen to the perspective of the other side. So BOTH are ignorant of the real truth.

7points

RuthieT 3 years ago (edited)

Medical debt (no medicare4All) , high imprisonment for petty crimes, huge student loan debt, no significant minimum wage increase, police brutality, racism… political gaslighting. Failed promises from politicians both left and right. The US political system on both sides does not deliver for their constituents, but does deliver for its donors - dark money 💵 The US needs a political revolution now 👊👊🏿👊🏾👊🏽👊🏼👊🏻

12points

loty moty 3 years ago

It's just some people think it's spiraling down the toilet to the left and others that it's spiraling to the right.

7points

Nonna_SoF 3 years ago

So, my sleep med is starting to kick in this made me imagine a real interesting fountain.

0points

Adam Jeff 3 years ago

The other 20% think it's going straight to hell

6points

Enlee Jones 3 years ago

America is a third world hell hole cosplaying as a great country.

5points

browneyedgirl 3 years ago

Well, the UN office of Sustainable development has now downranked the US AGAIN to 41 from 37 points and now called a flawed Democracy, akin to a developing country. We are below Cuba and Bulgaria now. Disparity between rich and poor, racism and the environment are 3 of 17 categories they rank.

4points

Daniel Yamada 3 years ago

The other 20% are sure of it.

3points

Jason Marin 3 years ago (edited)

Thinks it's spiraling out of control? When was it ever actually in control? Um...Never.

3points

over it already 3 years ago

Sounds valid

3points

Nearly 21.8 million people are members of the r/nottheonion subreddit. It’s a testament to the quality of the community, the moderators, and the subject they focus on. Their content is a mix of good humor, social commentary, and total weirdness. Somewhat of a winning combination on the internet, we feel.

The sub has been around all the way since late October of 2008, and will be celebrating its 14th birthday in just over a month’s time. While everyone’s welcome to be a member, if you’re actually planning on posting any Bizarr-o World/Totally-Not-The-Onion-y headlines there, there are a bunch of rules that you’ve got to be aware of. They help maintain the high quality of the content and keep the community healthy.

The moderators of r/nottheonion ask members of the community to not alter any of the headlines that they share. “The title of your submission should match the article's headline exactly. Copy and paste from the article, leaving out any subtitles, bylines, or other information,” they write.

“Both the title and body of your article should sound like something The Onion would write. This can be highly subjective—there's no one-size-fits-all guide to what fits here. Moderators may rule posts Not Oniony at their own discretion,” the mod team explains that there’s a bit of subjectivity involved here as well. In short, the headline should sound like something you’d find on The Onion (or the just-as-witty The Babylon Bee if you’re on the other end of the political spectrum).

#13

Shaquille O'neal Says Gorillas Freak Out When He Comes Near, And Zoo Miami Executive Confirms They Are Intimidated By His Large Size

Final score:

339points

POST

Daniel Yamada 3 years ago

Keep your pants up, Shaq.

126points

Smiler 3 years ago

yeah stop showing kevin hart, shaq

11points

Edgar 3 years ago

I see what you did here !

9points

Glenn Cuneo 3 years ago

gorilla peckers are only about an inch long, why you they be angry all the time?

7points

Norah Reilly Premium 3 years ago

Shame on you!

0points

ohjojo (you/your's) 3 years ago

Exactly what I was going to say

0points

SealOfDisapproval 3 years ago

Here's Shaq with Yao Ming. shaqyao-63...a3b2dc.jpg

21points

Monday 3 years ago

So what you're saying is we need to get Yao Ming in front of a gorilla.

35points

Catlover129 3 years ago

To clarify perhaps --- I live within walking distance of the Zoo Miami and attend lots of their functions. Their spokesperson, Ron Magill, says Shaq has never been there as far as he knows (celebrities don't usually travel incognitio, they want you to know they are there, with their entourage) but did say that "it's possible the gorillas may feel uncomfortable with being near large humans".

13points

Jill Hojnacki 3 years ago

I volunteered at our zoo for years. We’d have to ask large men to step back from the viewing glass occasionally because the gorillas were getting upset with their proximity. So, it’s not just Shaq, and it’s not just these gorillas. It’s a recognized issue at zoos.

4points

Brivid 3 years ago

Thank you for clarifying.

0points

Maisey Myles 3 years ago

Aren't you a ray of black.

-3points

Katie Lutesinger 3 years ago

I know I'M intimidated by that guy's size. He is one massive, massive dude.

8points

Kel_how 3 years ago

Was he harassing the pandas, too?

4points

Gul Dukat 3 years ago

Well, obviously

4points

Lynda Birch 3 years ago

Especially when he started to thump his chest!

5points

Androgyny Lunacy 3 years ago

That is pretty crazy. So they must not see humans as too different from themselves?

2points

JL 3 years ago

It's not that, they're just freaked out because they saw Kazaam.

2points

cwa92464 3 years ago

ummmmmmmmmmmm

1point

Confused Otter 3 years ago

Donkey Kong went to the Zoo

1point

#14

Somali Militant Group Al-Shabaab Announces Ban On Single-Use Plastic Bags

Final score:

295points

POST

Lynda Birch 3 years ago

Pirates with an environmental conscience

201points

Jods 3 years ago

No, they only carry out murders, genocide, kidnapping of children, rape, torture, beheadings - that sort of thing.

26points

Yay Pandas! 3 years ago

Not gonna carry ammo in those plastic bags no more, no sir.

8points

Carolyn Risling 3 years ago

For real? No . . . . .

0points

I'm done 3 years ago

This comment has been deleted.

0points

alias D. 3 years ago

They are the one in the waters if they are pirates

0points

M Kawai 3 years ago

Save the planet, not lives

28points

csnakey 3 years ago

Save the planet by removing those who disturb it

1point

Yubo 3 years ago

I watched a documentary on Somalians. I feel extremely sad for them. If you watch this documentary "Stolen Seas" and "Seaspiracy", you will learn that major fishing industries have pushed these natives to do what they did. You too would do what you need to do to ensure your family survives. It's the super rich industries taking from the mouths of children.

17points

Kat 3 years ago

At first, yes they were sort of Robin Hood kind of bandits. But then some people started seeing it as a business model and a way of getting power and wealth.... And then things went really south ... The actual pirates doing the dangerous work at sea were payed almost nothing, were continuously supplied with quat, sold to them at high price by their employer...

3points

Korin T 3 years ago

Will they ban single use plastic explosive?

7points

Brindle Nutter 3 years ago

oh ok, but rape murder terrorism and other fun things are A-OK

3points

Kylie Mountain Premium 3 years ago

Even terrorists realize single use plastic is stupid.

3points

Yubo 3 years ago

I don't view Somalians as terrorists. Watch "Seaspiracy" and you will gain a better understanding of these people.

4points

Porpoisepower 3 years ago

Who says you can't agree with your enemies?

3points

Ember 3 years ago

I really need to know more about this story……lol

3points

Viktor 3 years ago

The neighbouring country of Kenya introduced such a ban a few years ago to combat pollution from plastic and they try to copy it. Al-Shabaab controls large parts of rural Somalia. It’s a bit mafia-like with ‚protection money‘/tax in exchange for safety but works surprisingly well (as long as you follow their rules). They are the de-facto government in those regions. The actual government is too poor to do much about it. Source: my wife is Somali and her dad is involved in the government trying to rebuild the country.

16points

Colin Timp 3 years ago

Meanwhile they're cutting holes in oil pipelines and polluting via makeshift refineries.

2points

Jp@nda 3 years ago

Yeah great for the environment but let's forget the fact that they are tied to and support Al Qaeda and Boko Haram but yeah plastic bags is the problem?!!? WTF BP?

1point

#15

A Youtuber Got The Inflammatory Right-Wing Commentator Katie Hopkins To Fly To Prague To Pick Up A Fake Award Whose Initials Spelled Out The C-Word

Final score:

294points

POST

Sian E 3 years ago

For those who don't know, C**ty Hopkins is a racist, narcissistic, psychopath.

222points

Sandeep Patel 3 years ago

and thats putting it nicely!!

45points

Katy McMouse Premium 3 years ago (edited)

So, she's cousin to Marjorie "Tater-Tots-Have-Higher-IQ's" Greene?

42points

UncleRussian 3 years ago

Never heard of her, maybe I'll read some of her stuff, I like reading unhinged s*it crazy people write

17points

Liv 3 years ago

I'm happy to never have heard of her, as I'm not from the US, but thanks for the clarification, it was useful to get the post! Now I'll continue my happier life without thinking of her again. Enough of those people around. 😬

13points

HarperTheCentaur (they/them) 3 years ago

Scratch that, I know actual narcissistic psychopaths who are better people than her. (Not a joke, a friend of mine actually has NPD and ASPD and she's worked really hard to overcome her symptoms and be a good person. She's a total inspiration and one of the sweetest, most thoughtful people I know. Disorders don't make the person!)

11points

T5n 3 years ago

Thank you for the explanation. I’m glad I didn’t search her so my internet search results aren’t tainted.

5points

Androgyny Lunacy 3 years ago

Thanks for the info. Don't know who she is. Lol

2points

ohjojo (you/your's) 3 years ago

In her case the c word is commentator

1point

Kat Lyle 3 years ago

She also earned me a ban on facebook for calling her literal trailer trash when she lost her court case...

0points

Harry Hwt 3 years ago

I'm not defending her at all but you know narsasists and psychopaths type 2(sociopaths) are literally all over the place there are literally thousands if not millions

0points

Pamela Worthington-Smack 3 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

N C 3 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Gul Dukat 3 years ago

and they filmed it all. It's on YouTube with 8.4 million views.

44points

The lesbian knitting panda 3 years ago

doing the people's work

21points

Ricky Namara 3 years ago

Even better are her reaction video. Hint: she mad.

6points

Blue 3 years ago

I genuinely felt bad until I heard her acceptance speech. OMFG!!!!

1point

Little Wonder 3 years ago

It was the Campaign to Unify the Nation Trophy

41points

Thee8thsense 3 years ago

I thought it was Calling Unfeeling Nasty Twats...

6points

Mark Fuller 3 years ago

She's utterly vile. Makes a career out of tearing strips off everyone and everything. Nasty human being.

24points

Tina Hugh 3 years ago

I’ve never seen so many genuine smiles in a group pic:-)

21points

Kate Jones 3 years ago

I had never heard of this woman outside of the clip I've seen online of her talking about how India wasn't a place...lol. So I just looked her up on Wikipedia and...wow. She's just straight up evil. She likes to retract a lot of her statements and claim it was misspellings or accidents. She's what I like to call a Liberal Nazi-- a wishy-washy racist who doesn't want to admit she is, and will talk about people leaching off the taxpayers while also leaching off the taxpayers herself but she's somehow above other people. She talks about final solutions and gassing people, then claims she's not a racist. I actually have more respect- if that's what you want to call it- for people who come out and proudly call themselves racists. At least with some white sheet wearing Klan member there's no ambiguity. They don't try and backtrack when there are consequences to their actions or try to convince themselves they aren't exactly what they are.

19points

Mary Elliott 3 years ago

How exactly is a British far-right political commentator liberal?

6points

Vern Ehlers 3 years ago

Someone should do this to Marjory Taylor Greene.

18points

Minath 3 years ago

She deserves every misfortune she has brought on herself.

18points

Jods 3 years ago

Stupid self-centred racist cow. Serves her right.

9points

Toni Ahlgren 3 years ago

So what were the initials? Surely not Charisma, Uniqueness, Nerve and Talent?

8points

DumYum 3 years ago

OMG TIL what RuPaul has been doing all these years, and I’ve watched every Drag Race episode and never caught on. Thank you even though I feel like the day I learned there was no Santa.

2points

Obviously, the headlines you share have to be from news articles. So blog or social media posts simply won’t cut it here. You should also aim to use original and reliable sources. Nothing older than two weeks of the publication date should be shared on the sub. Meanwhile, try to avoid tabloid news stories.

Outlets like The Sun, The Mirror, The Daily Mail, and others tend to overhype certain stories and sometimes strongly rely on the rumor mill and guesswork. There are plenty of capable, hard-working journalists working there. But the format of their stories is, well, that of tabloids. Naturally, that bleeds over to their headlines.

Take care to check if the headline you’re sharing is actually true and not satire. Some well-respected news sites actually have their own satirical sections: for example, the legendary Borowitz Report on The New Yorker. (As a side note, Pandas, if you haven’t already, check the BR out; it’s great stuff… as is The New Yorker as a whole.)

#16

White House Threatens To Fire Anyone Who Tries To Quit

Final score:

280points

POST

Lauren Copland 3 years ago

There goes my chance!

93points

Mayra 3 years ago

Don’t employees get more benefits when they get fired vs quitting?

36points

Monday 3 years ago

Generally. It looks worse when you get fired but you get better severance most of the time.

24points

Draperdorf 3 years ago

Sounds like a Trump tweet

17points

Kookamunga 3 years ago

Exactly. Can I just get one day where I don't have to see his repulsive face or hear his name? celebritie...094ea1.jpg

15points

Simon Bolivar 3 years ago

Overheard at Mar-A-Lardo: "Please...don't tell mom I work for Trump, she thinks I play piano in a wh*rehouse."

9points

Maisey Myles 3 years ago

You win!

0points

Éowyn The Detransitioner 3 years ago (edited)

That's like how people who tried to commit suicide would get the death sentence in Britain a few hundred years ago! Sorry for the morbid comparison

6points

Don't you wish you knew 3 years ago

If I quit what are you gonna do about? Oh, Fire me. Go ahead, try! 🤣

5points

Penny Hernandez 3 years ago

Did they realize that it's easier to collect Unemployment Insurance if you've been fired?

3points

Susanne B 3 years ago

They probably didn't or they would just have let you quit.

0points

Your Average Panda 3 years ago

What a threat!

3points

Yubo 3 years ago

Sounds like that place I work at!! LOL!

2points

AlanandLeila Hoyt 3 years ago

That’s the best outcome for anyone who wants to quit any employer because then you can get unemployment

1point

#17

Pregnant Texas Woman Driving In Hov Lane Told Police Her Unborn Child Counted As A Passenger

Final score:

258points

POST

Kate 3 years ago

She contested the ticket and it was dismissed. So was a second ticket for the same thing. She has since had a healthy baby girl.

226points

Misstaken138 3 years ago

Thanks! I was curious about the outcome

16points

Jordi Sharpe 3 years ago

So even cops don't believe that life begins at conception. Hmmmmm.....

15points

Colin Timp 3 years ago

It was the same officer that cited her the second time; even though he knew it had been dismissed.

6points

Dorothy Cloud 3 years ago

My word, can you imagine how that baby is going to be raised...............entitled!!!

0points

Cass Malone 3 years ago

Ty for the update

0points

Lea Panthera 3 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Donkeywheel 3 years ago

Well, Texas is a red state where a fetus is considered a whole person regarding abortion, so why not.

98points

Monday 3 years ago

Exactly! If abortion law sees it as a person then traffic law should too.

81points

Yubo 3 years ago

If a pregnant woman's child is consider a viable human even at two months pregnant, she should be able to claim her unborn child as a dependent on her taxes.

45points

Izzy_ 3 years ago

Brilliant!!!

0points

Ally Joy 3 years ago

TX, and any other state that compels women to have children, you can't talk from both sides of your mouth. Also, support should begin at the time of conception.

38points

bottomless.abyss.of.bordem 3 years ago

The problem with your argument is that it's logical.

23points

Kate Jones 3 years ago

Honestly, if they're going to take our rights to abortion away, then we should be able to benefit from the loopholes in their decision. If you want to count this as a full person, I shouldn't get a ticket. I should also be able to take out an insurance policy on the fetus and collect if anything goes wrong or I miscarry. I should be able to apply for child support and WIC immediately if necessary and I should be getting tax rebates from the time I get pregnant, not after the baby is born. Also, in the states outlawing abortion even in the cases of birth defects, we should be allowed to collect from the state for disability and lost wages in order to stay home and take care of the disabled child since I was given no right to terminate when the diagnosis was made. And the woman's partner should be able to take out life insurance on her that will pay out if she dies in childbirth.

23points

Tom G 3 years ago

And any human IVF embryos in the state should also get tax deductions... They are embryos, even if they aren't going to be born or are in a woman...

10points

Deborah B 3 years ago

Well, if it's an anti-abortion state, she has a good arguement.

11points

Your Average Panda 3 years ago (edited)

I heard about this. Her reasoning was that, since abortion is "murder" now, aren't unborn people legally people?

8points

Xray0976 3 years ago

Oh what double standards these idiot Texan Republicans weave

6points

Misstaken138 3 years ago

I've always wondered if this argument is legally valid. I used to joke about using the carpool lane when I was pregnant, but never did because it wasn't worth the ticket to find out if the argument held water. I mean, she's technically not wrong.

3points

madbakes 3 years ago

It works well because Texas has passed stringent anti-abortion legislation. If you're in a state with similar laws, go for it!

3points

Lauren Copland 3 years ago

Technically.. even if it is a fetus it's a person, right?

3points

over it already 3 years ago

In Texas, likely has more rights than the woman.

41points

General Anaesthesia 3 years ago (edited)

According to Texas law maybe, but not necessarily according to science.

10points

#18

Man Who Ate $120,000 Art Banana Said He Would've Done It Sooner, But Wasn't Hungry Yet

Final score:

251points

POST

Gul Dukat 3 years ago

Two people for scale

397points

olx 3 years ago

underrated comment

23points

Linus G. 3 years ago

Got me to LOL! Thanks...

1point

Maisey Myles 3 years ago

You win!

1point

Daman dan 3 years ago

Everyone stop scrolling, you won't find a better comment!

0points

Orange Is Aging 3 years ago

Banana for scale to see how big the people are.

0points

Susie Elle 3 years ago

Wasn't this banana put there by someone who was trying to prove how silly art can be?

23points

wist_the_goblin (they/he) 3 years ago

if you tape a banana to a wall and charge 120 grand for it, you should expect people to be hungry.

12points

Chris Yuen 3 years ago

That was my 3pm snack

5points

Daniel Yamada 3 years ago

I need a football field for scale.

5points

Kiwi Panda 3 years ago

Or a washing machine

1point

Sydney Smith 3 years ago

$120,000 Banana Art? Rich ppl will waste money on anything, no matter how stupid / ridiculous, as long as it is expensive.

4points

DancingPanda 3 years ago

Google the invisible sculpture, it was sold for $18,300 there’s nothing to move or even look at

2points

Dan 3 years ago

Banana! 😆

3points

3 years ago

Please google peanut butter floor by Dutch man Wim T Schippers...

2points

Shayne Randlett 3 years ago

From Wikipedia: "At least three visitors accidentally walked onto the floor, and were held responsible for the damage." This is hilarious. I wonder if they charged them a fine or just handed them a knife and told them to smooth out their footprints

2points

Will Cancel 3 years ago

thats not art. its a banana. smh

2points

Kitty Purry 3 years ago

$120,000?!! I can paint fruit.

2points

Sinister Murder 3 years ago

Paint?

4points

Writer, editor, and journalist Ariane Sherine, from London, told Bored Panda during a recent interview exactly how to make a headline stand out from the crowd.

“Work out what in the article people want to know most, and then write a headline that suggests they'll learn that if they click on it—but ensure the payoff is just as good as the headline promises,” she told us.

“Clickbait works because people are desperate to know the 'one weird trick that doctors don't want you to know!' or similar. When it turns out that the trick is actually something really mundane, readers feel cheated," media expert Ariane explained to Bored Panda that clickbait works only as long as the content in the article is worth the audience’s attention.

She added that bad news stories are usually more dramatic than good news, meaning there’s more entertainment to be had, even if the topic is making you miserable.

“This instinct towards drama and not empathy doesn't show humanity in its best light,” the writer said. “They [the readers] want to ogle at what's happened because it's dramatic and entertaining and scary, but it's also a warning of what could happen to them if they're not careful,” she noted that articles about bad events are akin to car crashes.

#19

Nevada Man Who Claimed To Have Proof Of Illegal Voting Pleads Guilty To Voting Twice

Final score:

250points

POST

kathoco 3 years ago

Well, he wasn’t wrong - there was illegal voting.

236points

Monday 3 years ago

and he had proof! His own confession!

51points

Kate Jones 3 years ago

What a doucheface. Every case of illegal voting that's been caught has been by Republicans so far. I don't blame all republicans but I can't understand this hypocrisy-- where is all the outrage toward them by those same republicans yelling about it? If a republican does it it's less of a problem?

20points

Lisa Miller 3 years ago

If a republican does it, it's not a problem at all. You know their mantra, the election is rigged unless we win.

16points

YourSecretSanta 3 years ago

I mean, he did have proof

17points

Pamela Worthington-Smack 3 years ago

His demagogue has taught all his worshippers that the first thing you do after committing a crime is accuse someone else of it. It's an extraordinarily powerful PR tool. I believe you'll find it in both Machiavelli and Sun Tzu..

5points

madbakes 3 years ago

Which has been the case for most of these nuts...

4points

Minath 3 years ago

Well he wasn't wrong.

4points

M Kawai 3 years ago

Bam! There you go!

3points

D Battle II 3 years ago

Imagine being your own star witness!

2points

Sage Gusano 3 years ago

He was right then.

2points

TheAquarius1978 3 years ago

Well..... He was right though lmao.

2points

#20

After Permit Approved For Whites-Only Church, Small Minnesota Town Insists It Isn't Racist

Final score:

246points

POST

Lauren Copland 3 years ago

church identified as white supremacist group........ WHAT

150points

pink_panda 3 years ago

UGH it appears to be a group of neopagans who try to connect with their pre-Christian spiritual heritage (cool) but then use it as justification for their racism (utterly gross and awful). They give pagans a bad name.

21points

Kel_how 3 years ago

At least they're upfront about it, I guess?

20points

Crazy catz Premium 3 years ago

Yeah, but it's ok, they said they weren't racist, just blows my mind how it is still like this, after everything, everyone bleeds the same blood, everyone breathes the same air, its disgusting that it was allowed

11points

Poultry Geist 3 years ago

Right ! It’s almost like they can’t hear themselves

5points

Jordi Sharpe 3 years ago

Funny because a whole other group of Scandanavian white supremacists would burn it down in the name of Burzum.

2points

Randy Klefbeck 3 years ago

The Ku Klux Klan considers itself a Christian group.

1point

just.a.loser 3 years ago

why are you suprised

0points

Minath 3 years ago

At least every decent person in the area knows where to avoid now. I wonder how many times the "church" and the cars of its followers are vandalised.

24points

over it already 3 years ago

Keeping hope alive, I like it.

16points

Lynda Birch 3 years ago

No we're not racist - we just anti melanin

19points

Monday 3 years ago

You think they'd let a black person with albinism in? I mean technically their skin is white after all!

21points

Gozer LeGozerian 3 years ago

As part if the REAL Nordic people, we don't claim these racists nor acknowledge their attempt at gatekeeping Nordic culture as something racist

14points

liaqvist 3 years ago

Yes, as a Scandinavian, I second this!

8points

Terran 3 years ago

Ah yes, white supremacists following the gods of a people that managed to mix their blood with everyone from Ireland over north Africa to Byzantium. That became rich by plundering and became powerful by trading with literally anyone anywhere whatever they f**k was there to be traded. If any of these wannabe pagan dim-wits would have read a single history book they wouldn't spread their ignorance like wildfire.

14points

Susanne B 3 years ago

Do you think that they can read?

0points

The Silly Stellar Jay 3 years ago

Well, then the city has no backbone. This seems like an excuse.

13points

Roman Hans 3 years ago

I honestly don't know. "Religious" people are getting away with a lot under the guise of "sincerely-held beliefs."

13points

Leo Domitrix 3 years ago

That's ... a new label for Nazism. Maybe there's someone authentic in Scandinavia, but in the US/Canada, it's all about the racist BS

8points

Terran 3 years ago

Basically all that is known about the nordic religions was written down centuries later by christians. Neo-Paganism hasn't much to do with its religious roots.

2points

Svenne O'Lotta 3 years ago

Dumbass seppos appropriating Scandinavian culture chapter 8826268

6points

Tweetysvoice 3 years ago

Oh the irony of the bible's skin color majority...

6points

Panda Kicki 3 years ago

This isnt christian. Asatru is the nordic viking gods, sometimes kidnaped by racists, but skin colour or even species isnt a thing for them. They marry trolls and giants..

15points

Lene 3 years ago (edited)

Eehhmm..... what does ásatrú has to do with churches? We don't do churches. We may have a temple here and there. But churches are for the Christians. Not the ásatrúar.

5points

Asteríx Viking 3 years ago

True. We do not. And blot is mostly out in the forest. 🌲🌳

0points

#21

Okc Jailers Face Cruelty Charge; Playing 'Baby Shark' On Loop Is 'Inhuman,' Prosecutor Says

Final score:

245points

POST

Don't you wish you knew 3 years ago

I have to agree. And I'm glad I got here early, so no one I don't have to see the comments of typing out the song so it's stuck in everyone's head. 🤣

148points

Jods 3 years ago

I had to go and look it up on YouTube a few months ago. Oh, I feel so stupid. My ear worm has turned into a boa constrictor.

14points

Kel_how 3 years ago

Thank you for your service

9points

myvloggun 3 years ago

dont worry, the song started when we saw the name.

6points

Karla Nelsen 3 years ago

Just playing it ONCE is inhumane!

5points

Xenon 3 years ago

Luckily I have never heard it, therefore I am safe!

4points

LeeBreezy 3 years ago

baby shark do-do-do-do-do-do

4points

Luna Crow 3 years ago

Don't think I've ever heard that one (thankfully, apparently), but I'm stuck on a worksite that thinks it's funny to play one song on repeat all day. I will advocate against this practice until the day I die. It is just plain inhumane. period.

2points

iblewsheep 3 years ago (edited)

it takes no typing whatsoever to get that one in there, (thank you to those who posted this) but i bow to you for the attempt

1point

Kitty Purry 3 years ago

YESSSSSS

1point

BBsparkster614 3 years ago

Let’s keep upvoting this to keep this hidden

-1point

Russell Romick 3 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Ember 3 years ago

Can I sue my kid for the inhuman torture I had to endure?

20points

Misstaken138 3 years ago

Playing anything on a loop is inhuman, but Baby Shark is just pure evil. Whoever thought to do that is one sick individual.

11points

Nicole Weymann 3 years ago

Ever tried "Pink Fluffy Unicorns Dancing On Rainbows"? I think it's a hot contender. Took me weeks to unhate the generalls nice person who showed it to me.

5points

ZombieSushi386 3 years ago

Yet when the managers at my former job would do this it was just a joke. Seriously though I can see the truth in this. We had one in particular at my last job who literally had a playlist of the most horrible earworms ever and would play it on a loop. All day. She took an extended leave to have back surgery and for 3 blissful months the call floor was happier than I had ever seen it. No baby shark, no barney songs or the song that never ends. It was great. We were more productive and sales went well above what they usually were. When she came back first thing she did was play baby shark while getting on the intercom to announce her return. Things quickly went back to being awful and I ended up quitting shortly after. I never realized how much something like this can effect you until I finally escaped. Still get instantly angry when I hear that song though.

8points

Jaya 3 years ago

I remember about 15 years or something ago, musicians being really upset that the US army used their music to torture war prisoners by blasting it superloudly at the prisoners, non-stop for days. That must be so difficult as a musician, to know that a song that you sent into the world for people to enjoy, is used as actual torture.

6points

similarly 3 years ago

The Barney "I Love You" song as well.

1point

Wysteria_Rose 3 years ago

Not even the worst part: one of the inmates who was involved in reporting the jailers was recently found dead in his cell this last week. Obviously they're investigating but it's infuriating.

6points

Bobby 3 years ago

Did they go to the Joe Arpaio school of prison administration? Guy is a garbage human if you feel the need to look him up. Basically got elected just so he could treat people as less than human in a very flagrant way

4points

Carol Smith-Jones 3 years ago

That inmate was just found dead.....

4points

Maisey Myles 3 years ago

Sad

0points

Tamra 3 years ago (edited)

It's a funny headline, sure, but the full story is a sad and appalling commentary on the US prison system. These guys were isolated with the music being blasted at loud volume on a continuous loop, and were also spat on by the officers.

4points

Bouche Clay 3 years ago

As someone who spent 11 years in prison, I tell you all that abuse is rampant. It's mostly emotional and mental. There's a lot of gaslighting and other manipulation. It rips a person down to their soul and then some. A prisoner is the lowest form of life, and there is no rising from the ashes. The greatest and most difficult battle in prison is to find and hold to yourself. It's very much an us vs. them scenario. The constant humiliation is almost beyond bearing.

3points

William Mclaurin 3 years ago

I was in for 7 years and wholeheartedly agree.

1point

Media and entertainment expert Mike Sington, from Los Angeles, recently spoke with Bored Panda about why people tend to flock to negative news stories more than positive ones. He also shared his thoughts as to why internet users love expressing their hate for something on social media.

"People enjoy being part of a gang that can pile on, and hate things, on social media. Plus it can be done anonymously, from behind a screen, in the comfort of your home," he said.

#22

Doordash Spent $5.5 Million To Advertise Their $1 Million Charity Donation

Final score:

241points

POST

Lauren Copland 3 years ago

Look! Buy from us! We're good, I swear. We even spent a million on charity and then continued to post a 5.5 mil ad!

74points

Draperdorf 3 years ago

Sounds fair, I mean charities don't need more than a million do they, and there really isn't enough money for others to get paid a living wage....

13points

A.Ham 3 years ago

Up voting solely for Thomas Jefferson/Lafayette.. IYKYK

13points

LeeBreezy 3 years ago

im taking this horse by the reins, making redcoats redder with bloodstains

5points

P B Wilson 3 years ago

Don't use companies like this

8points

Paul Neff 3 years ago

This is not a unique occurance, other companies did similar things to this!

8points

LeeBreezy 3 years ago

the "we are the world" videos for example. those fill me with such rage for some reason

1point

Onion Cutting Ninja 3 years ago

is that Daveed Diggs im seeing?

6points

Deborah Harris 3 years ago

Such a waste of money

4points

Serial pacifist 3 years ago

Priorities

4points

Maisey Myles 3 years ago

What gets me is some of the 'Charity Balls' and what I call Organ Parties- think the heart kidney foundations and even the Eye Ball- I'm serious! Women will spend thousands of dollars just for a dress that they will never wear again, hair, make-up, shoes etc. why not just write a fat check and stay home?

1point

Cammy Cat 3 years ago

Because it's considered "advertising"

1point

#23

Man Arrested For Smoking Marijuana While In Court For Marijuana Charge

Final score:

237points

POST

Katie Lutesinger 3 years ago

"And I'd do it again."

162points

Kel_how 3 years ago

He does look very pleased with his choice

34points

TheAquarius1978 3 years ago

I'v seen this One on " court cam " dude just light his joint right in front of the judge and got arrested for " contempt to court " however he did it as a protest and just not because he was a pothead lol.

17points

Thee8thsense 3 years ago

Indeed he remained true to the weed.

7points

idrow1 3 years ago

No weedgrets.

5points

John Dilligaf 3 years ago

That face just screams "I regret nothing!!"

4points

Sterrinatu 3 years ago

My mom was arrested for a DUI while on her way to serve time for a DUI. Not her finest moment in life. She's sober now thankfully.

4points

Paddling Panda 3 years ago

Zero f*cks given.

4points

A very bored panda 3 years ago

Was this in Florida perchance?

3points

Éowyn The Detransitioner 3 years ago

I saw this on YouTube! The guy (arrested for possession of marijuana and speeding) lit up a join in Court after the Judge was trying to settle a trial date. Just found the YouTube video, here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PIotJjzDyHM&t=603s

3points

That nerd Zoe ️‍🇺🇦️‍ 3 years ago

Absolute legend

2points

#24

Dogs Cannot Get ‘Autism’, British Veterinary Association Warns After ‘Anti-Vaxx’ Movement Spread To Pets

Final score:

236points

POST

Draperdorf 3 years ago

Autism is not caused by vaccinations anyway, so it's a completely moot point.

272points

Katie Lutesinger 3 years ago

THANKYOU. I have it, my sister doesn't, and out of my six cousins one has it and the aunt on that side of the family hasn't been diagnosed but definitely has some of the traits, as does my dad. And we all had the same vaccination shots growing up. The actual common denominator here is that we're related and that it clearly runs in my dad's side of the family. It's precisely what were asked about when I was formally diagnosed.

39points

Monday 3 years ago

Exactly. You can't even "get" autism either. You either have it at birth or you don't. Depending on where on the spectrum you fall it shows up at different times, and unfortunately the first common signs start to show when the kids are old enough to get their vaccines.

23points

Brenda Greene 3 years ago

These are the same people that tell me that my daughter has Down Syndrome because I was vaccinated. People are ignorant.

19points

Kel_how 3 years ago

So I guess they're fine with rabies

19points

Will Cancel 3 years ago

Wait, this one guy I know, heard from a guy at a party that he knew a guy who had a neighbor that told him, wait what was the question? (from what I have seen, that is how anti-vaxxers get their info, that and FB)

15points

Bean 3 years ago

Yeah but the anti-vac people have already been told that one and it didn’t work :(

15points

Amy Taylor 3 years ago

Yeah..their beloved Dr/ Wakefield was completely debunked and they STILL believe that nonsense. UGH.

8points

Leo Domitrix 3 years ago

Don't try to make sense. They don't have any. The humans, I mean. The dogs, yes.

7points

ohjojo (you/your's) 3 years ago

There you are bring common sense to the world. It just won't work here

3points

Strings 3 years ago

Sometimes, you have to fight stupid with stupid

2points

Jordi Sharpe 3 years ago

I'm sorry that you had to waste precious time writing this. Maybe one day, people will get it.

2points

Nitka Tsar 3 years ago

Yes but the stupid are death on that ear. Doctors will save more pets by stating the above, then by trying to educate idiots

2points

Bonnie Edwards 3 years ago

Talk to my younger, Autistic brother and his doctors.

0points

Estelle Winwoode 3 years ago

'Moot' means uncertain or open to debate. I think you mean irrelevant?

0points

Pamela Worthington-Smack 3 years ago

You will eventually go mad if you persist in annoying other people with facts.

0points

Loki’s Lil Butter Knife 3 years ago

The sheer stupidity, ignorance, and flat-out hatred spread by anti-vaxxers never ceases to terrify me.

20points

Nicole Weymann 3 years ago

I never knew anyone could "get" autism. It's not a disease, ist it?

8points

Bobby 3 years ago

It's considered a developmental disorder. There are people in the medical community that disagree with even that label though

5points

TheContrarian 3 years ago

My dog is on the spectrum. Hates loud noises, doesn't interact with other dogs socially, in his own world half the time.

7points

Babsevs 3 years ago

My vet claims our dog would be classed as *on the spectrum* if he was human due to many of his behaviours

4points

TheEndIsNigh🇨🇦and🇬🇧in🇺🇲 3 years ago

Santa Maria 🙄. Both my partner and I have ASD, none of our siblings or immediate family members do. We've all been vaccinated. It's not a real thing. Aside from that, does it not even occur to people that they were vaccinated as children and did not "turn autistic?" Their own healthy existence itself negates the argument.

6points

idrow1 3 years ago

God, people are stupid.

4points

Xray0976 3 years ago

Dogtism?

4points

Bored Raven 3 years ago

https://acamh.onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/j.1469-7610.2005.01425.x children were found to have developed autism even though they had not received the MMR vaccine.

2points

Shauna Voigt 3 years ago

They claim it's because the parents were vaccinated and passed the vaccine to their unborn child. There is no arguing with these people.

0points

Deux 3 years ago (edited)

I'm heartbroken human silliness and insanity is now putting poor dogs at risk.

2points

Brindle Nutter 3 years ago

all human fads infect the animal world, unfortunately

2points

"It’s much harder for positive, wholesome news to stand out. The negative tends to upset us or anger us, which grabs our attention viscerally,” Hollywood’s Ultimate Insider told us.

For instance, one thing that many people enjoy (even some of them won’t admit it) is seeing public figures and celebrities fall from grace. These are people that internet users look up to. Some of them even put them on a pedestal.

#25

Never Forget The CEO Who Bashed Millennials Over Entitlement Despite Being Handed Job By Dad

Final score:

234points

POST

Valerie Frederickson 3 years ago

What was Rich Boy’s name and did he go to Harvard or University of Spoiled Children?

68points

ShellsBells 3 years ago

His name is John Winning (haha) and he went to Scots College in Australia.

15points

EyeYamStewPeed 3 years ago

My mother, who came from a poor family, went to Harvard and is now successful. So did my dad. My mother went on to go to Yale. Not everyone who goes to Harvard is a rich spoiled child.

11points

B.Nelson 3 years ago

That is literally what California people call USC

2points

Upper Enchilada 3 years ago

And what is he the CEO of?

2points

Bobby 3 years ago

You can attend multiple schools you know

1point

Pamela Worthington-Smack 3 years ago

Scratch the surface of a "self made man," and find buckets of inherited money in tax-free offshore accounts.

11points

Lisa Miller 3 years ago

Trump

5points

Gul Dukat 3 years ago

With this headline, I expected a picture of a Trump

9points

Elizabeth Molloy 3 years ago

There's a face I could never get tired of punching!

8points

Poultry Geist 3 years ago

He was just repeating what he’s been taught like a good little parrot !

7points

Timbob 3 years ago

Well, if that’s him, it’s obvious he didn’t get it on looks.

4points

JL 3 years ago

He looks like he's friends with Pharma Bro.

3points

Cammy Cat 3 years ago

This is right up there with Kim K's comments about how people just need to get up and work to make a fortune like their family has. Yes, I will say they do work hard, but they hardly started out where most of the country and world is at

2points

William Mclaurin 3 years ago

Those bitches wouldn't know hard work if it crawled up their skank asses and threw a party.

1point

Mama Panda 3 years ago

Pot...meet Kettle

2points

Josh Tall 3 years ago

where's his chin?

2points

#26

Facebook Wants To Attract Young People, But Gen Z Teens Say It's A 'Boomer Social Network' Made For 'Old People'

Final score:

230points

POST

DforDory 3 years ago

Ok then, where can I pick up my pension?

89points

Leo Domitrix 3 years ago

Gen X, and I'm on it for one reason: Cats. Lots and lots of cats.

18points

Whitefox 3 years ago

Gen X and I'm on it to keep up with my family that are all over the place. and pets.. not just cats..*all* the pets! lol

6points

ItsJess 3 years ago

Gen X and I quit and it's helped so much. I have BP here to satisfy my need for cute animal memes

1point

Remi (He/Him) 3 years ago

Gen X and I have a dummy account so I can send photos to my parents via messenger and receive photos from them. We even video call sometimes.

0points

hhh cubed 3 years ago

Boomer here and I dumped FB about 8 years ago while doing my undergrad because it was a colossal avoidance vehicle and time waster. IG was next. So here I am doing important reading research on BP and reddit. Yep, point lost perhaps? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

14points

Pamela Worthington-Smack 3 years ago

Young people are correct. There are far better ways to acquire disinformation, have your privacy invaded, and be inundated with propaganda.

8points

Crouching hippo hidden panda 3 years ago

I have to agree, all I see on there is what my mum and aunts think is vitally interesting that day. Like the sunset or what was on offer at the garden centre. FB is only good for selling on marketplace

8points

Kat Min 3 years ago

Facebook ruined itself with its greed and insane algoryythms. Which is a shame because it is the only social network where you can create groups based on interest. It was actually good for real networking and I got a lot of freelance work over it. The others are just not the same Since every generation wants to find 'their' network because they don't want to be lumped in with 'the old' people, we will probably never have somethign like the early years of facebpok, again. Pity, really.

6points

Lisa Miller 3 years ago

All social media is cancer

4points

Sweetpotato314 3 years ago

I'm GenX and I'm on FB because my friends and family are all over the world, and it's an easy way to keep in touch with them. I don't click on c**p, and it's fine for what it is.

2points

hhh cubed 3 years ago

That was the reason that I was on it to begin with, to connect with family and friends all over the country and different parts of the world. Then it became obvious that a lot of them were the ones posting c**p in their feeds that I didn't want to be a part of or even want to be exposed to. Filtering those people out just became more bother than it was worth. Besides that, I didn't want to give them, or their followers, a window into my life or be asked to add them as a friend.

0points

idrow1 3 years ago

I'm gen-x and kind of feel this way. I abandoned fb a few years ago.

2points

Just Jeff 3 years ago

This one hurts a little... or a lot...

2points

#27

Negative Reviews For Scented Candles Rise Along With Covid-19 Cases

Final score:

215points

POST

DforDory 3 years ago

🤦‍♀️

113points

JJ 3 years ago

I can relate. Not that I left a bad review but I bought soap and bath bombs, before I lost my smell and taste and when the parcel arrived, I was like, "This stuff lay around for too long definitely." It didn't, I just hadn't lost my smell completely at that time. It's not gone within a second but goes slowly and hopefully comes back slowly again.

16points

Monday 3 years ago

Mine was gone within a second when I had covid. Like one moment I was smelling things semi-normally, like you would with a normal partially blocked nose and then BAM! no smell, no taste. Then a couple days later I woke up one morning and it was just back.

11points

General Anaesthesia 3 years ago

Thanks, I needed the laugh.

8points

LillieMean 3 years ago

At the beginning of the pandemic, I bought a nice soy wax candle with natural essential oils. I couldn't really smell it through the mask. What a mistake I made. In just five minutes, I was able to create a very suspicious-smelling bohemian hippie atmosphere in my home. The advertising slogan would have been, just add a guitar and green...😅

6points

ZombieSushi386 3 years ago

Almost a year later and my sense of smell still hasn't come back, aside from the phantom ones my nose hallucinates

5points

Aimee 3 years ago

Long covid hon. Hugs to you

3points

Pamela Worthington-Smack 3 years ago

Is this a good time to discuss my idea for penis-flavored condoms?

4points

Sheila Weila 3 years ago

I'm still wondering why we can't buy mouse-flavored cat food.

1point

C C 3 years ago

Smh

1point

Colin Timp 3 years ago

Some people have way too much time on their hands.

1point

Just Jeff 3 years ago

"WTH!? This one doesn't smell like anything either!!!"

1point

Wysteria_Rose 3 years ago

That is exactly how I knew I had it. The bath and body works candles can be smelt all through our apartment but when I was sick, it legit was just like inhaling air with no smell at all. I was rather amazed.

1point

"So when they fall from grace and mess up, there’s almost a sense of relief. It can be enjoyable to some people because the celebrity becomes more relatable. People realize things can go wrong in a celebrity’s life, so they’re really not that different from myself," he said.

#28

Don't Eat Or Inject Yourself With Disinfectant, Warns Fda Commissioner

Final score:

213points

POST

Kate 3 years ago

No no... if you think that'll cure you, by all means...

206points

Minath 3 years ago

I still can't believe that this announcement was necessary.

21points

Ripley 3 years ago

The face says it all - "I can't believe we actually have to say this s**t out loud".

15points

MAL 3 years ago

That's the face of a man who's 100% done.

9points

Don't you wish you knew 3 years ago

There's a reason for warning labels. It's called idiots live among us. 😉

9points

idrow1 3 years ago

Honestly, if you're loyal to your orange leader and he has commanded you to do this, you probably should.

8points

XenoMurph 3 years ago

Rectal UV lights though, stick it right up there.

8points

Draperdorf 3 years ago

Only a headline in the US!!

5points

M Kawai 3 years ago

Sad that there's a need for that warning. Just like the prescription drug adds that say "don't take this medication if you're allergic to it!"

4points

Lane Bass 3 years ago

His face says it all.

3points

#29

Anti-Vaccine Group Sues Facebook, Claims Fact-Checking Is “Censorship”

Final score:

206points

POST

M Kawai 3 years ago

All you have to say is "anti-vax group" and you know something idiotic is guaranteed to come next.

192points

Little Wonder 3 years ago

Mm, a former friend of mine posted a lot about how fact checking is censorship. Shortly after I fact checked something else she'd posted and she unfriended me.

32points

The Crushinator 3 years ago

Good riddance!!

7points

Viktor 3 years ago

Even if it were censorship, it’s a private platform and can censor whatever they want. Don’t like it? Create your own or buy a majority share and change it. Can’t afford either? Speaking at the corners of busy public roads used to work in the past, maybe try that.

26points

Shane S 3 years ago

Exactly!

1point

P B Wilson 3 years ago

You know we're circling the toilet when calling out a liar is censorship

19points

Gul Dukat 3 years ago

Stupid is as stupid does.

10points

Shane S 3 years ago (edited)

Social media companies are private organizations. You don’t have a ‘right’ to free speech in a privately owned forum. It’s no different than walking into McDonald’s and shouting racist propaganda. McDonald’s can ask you to stop and if you don’t, ask you to leave. People are so freaking entitled.

6points

IsItNapTimeYet 3 years ago

Since when is accurate information censorship? I am not always correct in what I say or know. However, I feel that if a person is not open to being incorrect, or learning different viewpoints, how do you grow as a person? We are human. We can be wrong, but be open to learning. I’m all for not being bashed for a viewpoint or what someone believes is accurate; but, I am also for allowing yourself to learn and change your viewpoint. As a nurse it hurts my head when anit-vax people talk.

5points

Tim Anderson 3 years ago (edited)

How about when a nurse starts talking anti-vax theories? Had that happen recently.

1point

Leo Domitrix 3 years ago

No, it's not censorship. YOu can still claim it, just not where you can kill people. Like yelling fire in a theater.

5points

Michelle C 3 years ago (edited)

Considering that Mark Zuckerberg admitted that Facebook uses our data without our consent (Cambridge Analytica, etc.) and their “fact-checking” is also questionable, I can understand the ire of this group. I don’t know if pursuing a lawsuit would have been the right course, but I can definitely understand the frustration of feeling suppressed unjustly. I do hope they worked out there concerns before they went to court!! Most of all, I’m irritated that litigation seems to be almost the first solution to every possible legal conflict now. Diplomacy matters, people! Communication matters! We’d get a lot more done that way if we focus on that rather than suing each other all the time!

4points

Kate Jones 3 years ago

There's an episode of South Park where everyone chooses to literally bury their heads in the sand to prove they didn't see something, and I thought that was a funny cartoonish exaggeration but now I'm seeing it's really what people want in order to not have to hear that they're wrong.

3points

#30

School Boy Takes Microwave To School To Carry Books After School Bans Bags

Final score:

201points

POST

Mayra 3 years ago

Missed opportunity to take a mini fridge to school

109points

Kel_how 3 years ago

Or a hand truck

9points

Just Jeff 3 years ago

or go full-size

1point

Amused panda 3 years ago

Yeah, but this way he can microwave some popcorn for him and his friends to eat whilst they watch the show that is the teachers' heads exploding when they realise a microwave isn't mentioned in the school rules.

0points

Jods 3 years ago

Like the school that wouldn’t allow bots to wear shorts so they went to school in skirts instead. Legends the lot of them. Also they looked good in them!

16points

Midoribird Aoi 3 years ago

Pretty sure you mean boys, right?

10points

Dani Pret 3 years ago (edited)

I'm missing something here... how are people supposed to carry everything? Why the ban?

9points

Na Schi Premium 3 years ago

If im remember correctly it was in the US and bags had been become a safety concern at this school, as students could carry concealed weapons in them.

3points

Joy JoyJoy 3 years ago

That microwave is for smashing on the head of whoever banned friggin BAGS

5points

Billy Harrelson 3 years ago

A lot of schools have banned bags because a kid might slip a gun or drugs into the school.

5points

Michelle C 3 years ago

That’s one way to protest! Well done, young man!

4points

cry_time 3 years ago

Ahhh my school did something like this once. Except it was for a day and someone also brought a microwave.

3points

Draperdorf 3 years ago

Ah the essence of Britishness.

3points

SeaLouse 3 years ago

The bag was the first true invention, and our species would have never evolved without it. Now we are evolving backwards.

1point

Ricky Namara 3 years ago

Also, what the f**k!? SCHOOLS bans BAGS!? What's next, the library banning books!?

1point

Pamela Worthington-Smack 3 years ago

Since doing so piecemeal is so inefficient, America should be open about its actual values, and simply ban education. ¶ On second thought, given how entering a classroom in This Great Nation increasingly risks the lives of students, perhaps no such action is necessary.

1point

Powerful Katrinka 3 years ago

Trump has come right out and said that if he becomes the president again, the first thing he's going to do is eliminate the Department of Education. The Republicans aren't even trying to hide it anymore.

0points

#31

United Nations Official Visiting Alabama To Investigate 'Great Poverty And Inequality'

Final score:

199points

POST

Whitey Black 3 years ago

Alabama? Know it well. I spent 25 years in Alabama one weekend.

188points

annacream 3 years ago

If you love Alabama, come on over to Mississippi. Bless your heart, you'll never be the same:)

8points

Leo Domitrix 3 years ago

For the win.

7points

DubstepBlade 3 years ago

How?

2points

420Rainbowpanda 3 years ago

🤣🤣

2points

DippityDooDerp 3 years ago

Why is that so accurate though 🤣🤣

1point

Andrew Bridge 3 years ago

When the plane landed did the pilot tell you to turn your watch back to 1951?

0points

cwa92464 3 years ago

Family reunion?

0points

Daniel Yamada 3 years ago

and cousins getting married in their trailer court.

8points

Random Person 3 years ago

Actually that's a misconception. Alabama has some of the strictest incest laws in the US due to the bad rep they get about it. Oregon actually has the highest amount of incestual marriages/child births.

7points

Pamela Worthington-Smack 3 years ago

The US hovers near the bottom of the list of the best developed nations in which to raise a child. It's fallen off the list of the world's best K-12 systems entirely.

7points

Biliegh Berrie 3 years ago

Not surprising. I had a hard home life, was passed every year with straight F's in the 80's.

2points

Enlee Jones 3 years ago

Alabama—come for the meth, stay because you sold your car to buy meth.

4points

Kel_how 3 years ago (edited)

No need to visit, just do a fly over. What you see will be enough. Also, no taxes and corrupt politicians miiight just be the problem...and a history of intense segregation and other prejudice.

3points

Stacy s 3 years ago

When I was in college, 20 years ago, i waiting in a huge line in order to see dentist without borders, connected to doctors without borders, in MI. It's crazy they had to come to the U.S. Back then there was NO possible health insurance for parentless young adults. Luckily my son is in college and on my health insurance thanks to the Healthcare Act.

2points

Yay Pandas! 3 years ago

He could have picked any state or city in the US to see homelessness and poverty.

2points

New Everywhere 3 years ago

Exactly. Some worse than others but it is everywhere and getting worse.

0points

loty moty 3 years ago

They are not wrong

2points

Lisa Miller 3 years ago

The United States: a first-world country with third-world problems.

1point

crazydogmama Premium 3 years ago

About time.

1point

#32

McDonald's Robber Demands Chicken Nuggets, Has To Accept Breakfast Food Because It Was Still Too Early

Final score:

185points

POST

Daniel Yamada 3 years ago

Michael Douglas would have gotten lunch food.

63points

Kenneth McCartney 3 years ago

Falling Down.

4points

Rider 3 years ago

Chuck Norris would've gotten a 7 course dinner.

3points

PolymathNecromancer 3 years ago

You, sir, win the internet today <3

2points

Russell Romick 3 years ago

Who?

0points

Deborah Harris 3 years ago

What a total McDuffin 👏

4points

Lauren Copland 3 years ago

I love this one 🤣😂😂

3points

Randy Klefbeck 3 years ago

I remember seeing a video some time ago with a woman attacking the drive up window because she could not get those at the time due to the hour.

1point

Biliegh Berrie 3 years ago

Did they really throw him in jail for being hungry?

1point

Susanne B 3 years ago

Not for being hungry apparently but for ordering food without paying for it

0points

Christof Irran 3 years ago

Florida Man?

0points

Melissa Hamed 3 years ago

Who robbed something that early in the morning?

0points

🤣🤣🤣 (Me while reading bp) 3 years ago

Sad when that happens

0points

Kevin Hickey 3 years ago

Hamburglar

0points

Ivy la Sangrienta 3 years ago

I have only been awake and out early enough for McDonald's breakfast ONCE! Once! In 1994, lol.

0points

#33

Us Military Could Lose Space Force Trademark To Netflix Series

Final score:

184points

POST

Daniel Yamada 3 years ago

The US Space Force is starting its own officer training academy. People who attend will be called Space Cadets.

117points

Tamra 3 years ago

😂

7points

3 Owls In A Coat 3 years ago

I wanna be a space cadet

4points

Zack Podany 3 years ago

And they won't have tables, since that one's owned by Microsoft.

1point

Anita Pickle 3 years ago

Don’t give them too many ideas now 🤣

1point

Courtney Christelle 3 years ago

We are truly living in the future.

0points

Norah Reilly Premium 3 years ago

Hee-hee!

0points

Katy McMouse Premium 3 years ago

I think coming up with that name was Trump's proudest moment. I can still hear his glee when he sprung that little gem on the world.

11points

Content Wombat 3 years ago

This is just stupid and a sign of the times.

9points

Chris Yuen 3 years ago

So netflix launched before US military?

6points

TheHalloweenTeen 3 years ago

I don't know if that was supposed to be a brilliant joke or not. But you actually made me laugh out loud.

2points

TheHalloweenTeen 3 years ago

Excuse me for not understanding the use of this branch, but what was it created for? Aliens? Death stars? So Donald Trump could leave a lasting print on our nation? We already have the Air Force, so is this just a parody? What about NASA? What's their job now?

5points

Daphne 3 years ago

Excellent show by the way!

5points

Amy 3 years ago (edited)

It was! It's really too bad it got cancelled. 😔

0points

Dre Mosley 3 years ago

If I join the Space Force and don't get stationed off world, I'll be disappointed.

4points

Bobby 3 years ago

So science fiction lied to me for almost a century. They always seemed to show the navy as the ones to split into space, not the airforce

4points

Inella‍ 3 years ago

Can they go into a trademark war when THEY stole the logo from Star Trek?

2points

Tara Moov 3 years ago

"but Netflix's streaming service was FIRST TO LAUNCH" 😀

1point

#34

Passenger Turned Away From Two Flights After Wearing 10 Layers Of Clothing To Avoid Luggage Fee

Final score:

181points

POST

Boudewijn van der Mik 3 years ago

Hey! It's cold up there!

50points

Clarf 3 years ago

Turned away? He should get an award for that creativity.

20points

ShellsBells 3 years ago

I flew to Cancun last month. Flight was less than 2 hours. Carry on bag charge $60 and checked bag was $55. I don't blame him. Some airlines go crazy over carrying personal items. I had to put my purse into my backpack, which both were going under my seat.

13points

Colin Timp 3 years ago

Somebody explain this to me. 50 lb weight limit on baggage, the reason is said to be for safety. However apparently that safety concern disappears if you pay an extra fee? Also, when considering total weight, you'll charge an extra fee to a 125 lb person that has 1 extra pound in their bag; but a 350 lb person with 49lbs in their bag has no extra fees?

8points

Susanne B 3 years ago

But a man who was very obese had to pay for an extra seat. The extra fee coud be explained with a plane having to carry enough fuel to lift the weight of aeroplane, baggage and passengers. So extra weight extra fuel extra fee.

0points

Just Another Girl 3 years ago

Was it Joey? Wearing ALL the clothes.

5points

Frankie 3 years ago

Came to say this lol. Could I BE wearing any more clothes?

4points

Shelli Aderman 3 years ago

l-php.png

4points

Jessica Tolar 3 years ago

Must be Ryanair

2points

M Kawai 3 years ago

That's just wrong! Period!

2points

Asif 3 years ago

I can't imagine how uncomfortable it would be to sit in 10 layers. I can barely sit in one. Thanks, menopause.

1point

backatya 3 years ago

I bet he was sweaty

0points

#35

‘Black Mirror’ Creator Says The World Is Too Bleak Right Now For Season 6 To Happen

Final score:

175points

POST

Don't you wish you knew 3 years ago

Well that makes sense

67points

loty moty 3 years ago

I'm tired of the dystopian shows and movies. How about a show about a bright and happy future that's way more likely?

15points

XenoMurph 3 years ago

Civilisation peaked about 2012. Tech will increase, but society seems to be in decline.

11points

Frando Bone 3 years ago

funny...I found most of the episodes contemporary and accurate, especially the one on social credit.

6points

TomCat 3 years ago

That was my favorite episode 😍

1point

XenoMurph 3 years ago

Any dystopian story he writes would be subject to legal challenge as some corporation is already doing it.

5points

Reinaldo Fuentes 3 years ago

TMW the real world overshadows your social science fiction dystopic commentary.

3points

The Silly Stellar Jay 3 years ago

This is disturbing beyond words.

3points

idrow1 3 years ago

That's a bullsh*t copout and bleak is why people tune in. If they wanted sunshine and rainbows they'd watch My Little Pony instead.

2points

BasedWang12.3 3 years ago

WE NEED IT

2points

Kat Min 3 years ago

True. I also wouldn't watch it, right now, even though, I loved the previous seasons. It's jjust too much. Light entertainment only for me, this winter.

2points

Michelle C 3 years ago

I don’t blame him!

1point

#36

UPS Loses Family's $846k Inheritance, Offers To Refund $32 Shipping Fee

Final score:

158points

POST

Viktor 3 years ago

So they shipped something worth 846k but skimped on the insurance? Sounds like self-inflicted damage…

124points

John 3 years ago (edited)

They shipped a bank draft, similar to a Certified Check, through UPS. The way it works is the money is withdrawn and held until someone cash in the draft which UPS lost. Bank refused to refund the held money and UPS couldn't find the draft.

31points

Ellen Woods 3 years ago

How do you know it wasn’t a check sent by an attorney using priority mail?

1point

Tony Pott 3 years ago

That was my thought. If shippers were expected to carry insurance to compensate for anything that was lost/damaged, no-one could afford to ship. If you want to move something from a->b you insure it youself.

1point

Daniel Yamada 3 years ago

What can brown do to you?

17points

Julie Ann Al buzbeba 3 years ago

Brown can S**T on you....

3points

H M 3 years ago

UPS did not refuse to replace the check, nor were they responsible for doing so. Instead, the bank that issued the check resolved the issue by providing the customer with a new note (after ten months of stalling).

15points

Nicole Weymann 3 years ago

Not quite off topic "ups" is the way German speakers spell "oops!"

15points

DforDory 3 years ago

UPSie daisy.

5points

Rose the Cook 3 years ago

Needs more information. What was sent that was worth so much?

4points

TuesdayDangerGirl 3 years ago

it was a bank check for his part of the inheritance. Eventually (after the story broke) the bank reissued the check.

20points

Lauren Copland 3 years ago

Hey! Look we can make up for it. Just take the $32

4points

Clarissa 3 years ago

Seriously?! For that kind of money, fly (first class) and carry it yourself. What about electronic transfer?

3points

Liz 3 years ago

It was what the bank told them to do. It all worked out in the end.

1point

Liz 3 years ago

The good news is that the bank did end up reissuing the draft and the man got his inheritance after 10 months

1point

Andrea Pereira 3 years ago

Can't the bank simply void the original draft (I mean, they should have some kind of control, serial numbers or something like that) and issue a new one??? Also, online transfers???

1point

John 3 years ago

"The following limits apply when sending Interac e-Transfers with TD: Per transfer: $3,000. 24 hours: $3,000. 7 days: $10,000. 30 days: $20,000."

0points

#37

Texas Gov. Excludes Gun Control From Special Committees On School Shootings

Final score:

152points

POST

YourSecretSanta 3 years ago

If you have not figured out by now, it seems they will do everything to try and stop school shootings except change the one thing that will stop school shootings - gun laws

202points

Leo Domitrix 3 years ago

Access to the guns is the issue. Always was, always will be. You can't pull a trigger on a gun that isn't there, as my gramps would say.

28points

Shane S 3 years ago

The rhetoric has devolved so much that any talk of gun control instantly means, “take all your guns!” to the crazies. So instead we just throw more guns and more police at the problem. As you know, relationships with police are doing really well right now anyway /s. *eyeroll.

11points

ItsJess 3 years ago

If only there was some common denominator in all these shootings...it might point to something we could try...

8points

iblewsheep 3 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Peter Maroney 3 years ago

Gun laws in themselves will not stop school shootings. You have to look at the big picture. How do these people get the guns? How are they stored? How are the people acting who use the guns? Who is responding to the scene of the crime? People seem to think that stricter gun laws equal more safety. Oh yeah? How's Chicago doing?

0points

Marci Rommal 3 years ago

Gun laws will NOT stop school shootings. They haven't work thus far, and they are not going to. The government is trying to keep us "common citizens" from HAVING guns. They do not want us able to protect ourselves. And who are we protecting ourselves from? You guessed it, THE GOVERNMENT. For about 50 years now, it has been: If you outlaw guns, only outlaws will have guns. Because they are not going to let any gun laws dissuade them from using a gun.

0points

Ellen Woods 3 years ago

That’s Texass for ya. Get all the guns and ammo you want. Zero waiting period. Now then, an abortion on the other hand, you have 6 weeks (42 days) to get that done. If it’s even possible.

0points

Michael Lederman 3 years ago

Correction the one thing they won't do is VIOLATE THE CONSTITUTIONAL RIGHTS

-2points

N C 3 years ago

Exactly. They need to eliminate most of the gun laws and eliminate gun free zones, where all these mass shootings happen, and it would almost ELIMINATE mass shootings!

-2points

Brian Helt 3 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

JC 3 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Chich Premium 3 years ago

If I see texas in the headline I now assume its about idiots and move on.

23points

Tamra 3 years ago

A proper assumption.

8points

Hobby Hopper 3 years ago

It's frustrating for us Texans to be associated with Abbott and Cruz and their ilk.

4points

Susanne B 3 years ago

I think we all do

0points

Loki’s Lil Butter Knife 3 years ago

Texas- we value our constitutional right to bare arms over the very safety of our children and a women's right to her own bodily autonomy.

11points

Susanne B 3 years ago

There are no dangerous weapons only dangerous 3 year olds, whose father forgot to lock the weapons cabinet.

0points

loty moty 3 years ago

We'll fight gun violence with "Our thoughts and prayers", "our thoughts and prayers ", ...

10points

Gul Dukat 3 years ago

look up "Thoughts and Prayers - The Game". It's hilarious

2points

Nikki Hilton 3 years ago

Abbott must go.

8points

Nonna_SoF 3 years ago

Incidently they also exclude funding for mental health with Texas and Florida consistently being at the bottom of the list of mental healthcare expenditures.

5points

Powerful Katrinka 3 years ago

But the minute there's a shooting, they start yelling that gun control won't work because the perpetrators have mental health problems.

2points

Thatkamloopsguy 3 years ago

This man, used lightly is such a major fu cking idiot. It truly scares me that people vote for this kind of s**t.

3points

Enlee Jones 3 years ago

America—life begins at conception and ends with a school shooting.

3points

lunanoire 3 years ago

This is the sob that had a tree fall on him while jogging and sued for a multimillion payout then when he was in the legislature he had a bill pass that capped damages at 250k for any accidents like that. He, Cruz, Patrick and Paxton are a covy of corrupt thieves. They don't care about Texas, kids, or women. It's sickening. Moved out of that state and will never go back. People are nice but the politics are horrible.

3points

Penny Hernandez 3 years ago

Tell the Gov. that school shootings could be considered post-natal abortion.

3points

#38

Japan Needs You

Final score:

147points

POST

loty moty 3 years ago

Packing my bags and moving to Japan right now

92points

Kitti B. 3 years ago

Good luck! They don't want foreigners to enter the country, that's why they started this campain. That's the point of this whole thing.

13points

Sawdust 3 years ago

There's a two drink minimum when you arrive in customs.

3points

Jenniffer Plourde 3 years ago

Really! In Canada the liquor stores do better in a recession! Lol.

0points

Lynda Birch 3 years ago

Just hire a few British stag and hen parties - economy will be well boosted by the end of the weekend

9points

General Anaesthesia 3 years ago (edited)

Agreed, but I don't think the Japanese would appreciate the propensity to public fornication of drunken young Brits.

7points

Daniel Yamada 3 years ago (edited)

True Fact: The Japanese government is also encouraging people to have more sex to help reverse the decline in population.

6points

C C 3 years ago

Ummm... reverse in population? Am I missing something here?

0points

AspieGirl88 2 years ago

FF Saké… 🤣

0points

Christof Irran 3 years ago

In every single country the economic damage to society associated with alcohol consumption (drunk driving accidents, emergency hospitalization, loss of income, court costs, etc.) is greater than tax receipts from alcohol (all levels of taxation associated alcohol).

0points

Gracie Mae 3 years ago

well yeah...think how much $$$ they'd generate for the government with dui, domestic violence, etc charges! Not to mention vehicle insurance rates going up, body shop work would increase from wrecks...wow

0points

O.M.Miki 3 years ago

kampie

0points

Sydnie Laney 3 years ago

HA

0points

Shayne Randlett 3 years ago

I'm always happy to support small businesses...

0points

marianne eliza 3 years ago

Right. Let's create more alcoholics so bar owners can increase their profits. Nothing wrong there.

0points

#39

North Korean Founder Kim Il Sung Did Not Have The Ability To Teleport, State Media Admits

Final score:

140points

POST

Lauren Copland 3 years ago

I choked on this one. Obvs he can teleport!

49points

Serial pacifist 3 years ago

No, he had help. Scotty had to beam him up each time.

8points

Ronda News Channel 3 years ago

They admitted it after Kim Il Sung died

6points

JL 3 years ago

You mean after he teleported to the afterlife?

5points

Colin Timp 3 years ago

But he still got 18 holes-in-one in a single round of golf, right?

3points

JL 3 years ago

I think that was his son who scored 18. He shot a 17.

4points

Melissa Hamed 3 years ago

I don't know which is stranger the fact that people thought he could teleport or the fact that the state had to actually admit he could not teleport.

2points

Your Average Panda 3 years ago (edited)

Say WHAT?! He couldn't?!

2points

Kate Jones 3 years ago

The fact they needed to put this out there is the saddest part.

2points

Kathryn Baylis 3 years ago (edited)

Aww, damn. Poor guy. Wish he would teleport himself to Hades and get stuck there. Be better if he took along some passengers—-basically his a*****e,buddies, drumpf, Putie, Balsonaro, and that Philippine dictator a*****e. Just to mention a few. Maybe he should teleport himself and the rest in a really long bus.

1point

O.M.Miki 3 years ago

beam him up

0points

Hugh Willie Mungous 3 years ago

How disappointing . . . . . I can think of one or two places I'd like to beam him up to . . . . . and one in particular one that I would like to beam him down to. Still, in the long run, I suppose, he'll find his way down there on his own volition eventually.

0points

#40

White House: 'The Science Should Not Stand In The Way' Of Reopening Schools – As It Happened

Final score:

138points

POST

Gul Dukat 3 years ago

"Lack of intelligence should not stand in the way of getting a job in this government“, she added.

155points

Nikki Hilton 3 years ago

Don't forget, "I will never lie to you," as she lied about lying.

7points

M Kawai 3 years ago

And there is SOLID documented proof in that statement!

7points

Kathryn Baylis 3 years ago (edited)

She’s young and blonde. Probably also an ex-beauty queen. Those were the only requirements drumpf listed on the help wanted ad.

3points

Catlover129 3 years ago

Yep - explains everything!

1point

Bridgit Gilmore 3 years ago

LOL...it doesn't.

0points

Peter Maroney 3 years ago

The best White House Press secretary ever!!!!! And shall I say, the best looking!

0points

ohjojo (you/your's) 3 years ago

Intelligence should not stand in the way of getting a job in this government

0points

N C 3 years ago

Too bad you didn't look up the full quote because that's not what she said. That's what the headline cropped her to have said.

0points

Kise Miarse 3 years ago

Sadly, it doesn't

0points

Leo Domitrix 3 years ago

"The science" did stand in the way. And, particularly in 2020, that saved lives. The longer we live with/around Covid-19, the more our species adapts. Particularly those of us who get the damn booster shots . You get 'em for polio, measles, flu, etc. so why complain that it's not a one-stop-shot? Oy.

9points

JC 3 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Seabeast 3 years ago

Oh look, it's Psycho Barbie.

5points

Thomas Ewing 3 years ago

In her Dream Hearse!

1point

idrow1 3 years ago

Isn't there a minimal standard of intelligence and common sense required to be in politics? Obviously not, I guess.

3points

Susanne B 3 years ago

Not until the voters posses those standards

0points

Thatkamloopsguy 3 years ago

She should have become a porn star, then at least her mouth would be good for something.

2points

Pamela Worthington-Smack 3 years ago

Well it certainly didn't stand in the way of negligent homicide committed against of hundreds of thousands of Americans by the people most sworn to protect them. Why should children be exempt from the consequences of public policy?

0points

Susie Elle 3 years ago

The science

0points

Kevin J. Henning 3 years ago

She would know

-1point

Nazda Pokmov 3 years ago

Much better on the eyes than the one currently holding the job

-2points

Seabeast 3 years ago

Right, because appearance is the only qualification for holding a public service position. 🙄

3points

David H 3 years ago (edited)

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Seabeast 3 years ago

Sigh. It isn't just the kids that you have to worry about though, is it? It's their teachers, their parents, their elderly grandparents, that neighbour with the high risk factors. School is not a bubble populated only by children.

7points

#41

Ben Affleck Finally Achieves Lifelong Dream Of Not Having To Play Batman Anymore

Final score:

138points

POST

Monday 3 years ago

Poor chap. That movie bombing wasn't his fault.

49points

Kylie Mountain Premium 3 years ago

The Fox Percy Jackson movies prove there's only so much even good actors can do with terrible writing.

14points

Jason Marin 3 years ago

I actually think Ben did a much better job of being Batman then he did being Daredevil.

6points

Confused Otter 3 years ago

You had us in the first part.

1point

Sam Cook 3 years ago (edited)

My favorite live-action Batman. Batman v Superman and Zack Snyder’s Justice League are two of my favorite comic book films, with the latter having beaten Avengers: Endgame for the top spot. Can’t wait to see him in The Flash and Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom.

0points

O.M.Miki 3 years ago

i didn't like him at batman at all.. so i'm happy for him

0points

Marci Rommal 3 years ago

Hey, he wasn't that great anyway.

0points

$cagsy 3 years ago

He will always live on in my heart as the only Batman to perform the trademark superhero landing as if he had skipped leg day and was carrying a tractor.

0points

Nazda Pokmov 3 years ago

But he had so many good lines!!!! Yeah, sure he did...

0points

Sage Gusano 3 years ago

He made me do a 180 on him playing that role when I saw the film

0points

#42

Sheriff Says Atlanta Shooting Suspect Was “Fed Up” And Had A “Really Bad Day”

Final score:

136points

POST

Lauren Copland 3 years ago

Guys, c'mon. He was having a rough day! "HE KILLED SOMEONE' YEAH BUT--

77points

Cydney Golden 3 years ago

Killed quite a few someones.

0points

UpQuarkDownQuark 3 years ago

Cherokee County Sheriff’s Office Capt. Jay Baker, a white man, said this about Robert Aaron Long, another white man, after Long went to three massage parlors and murdered eight people, six of whom were women of Asian descent. He is reported by one survivor to have said, “I’m going to kill all Asians.” The reason this headline is so important is that Capt. Fuckstick had previously posted pictures on his Facebook page of T-shirts that read “IMPORTED VIRUS FROM CHY-NA.” So yeah, to him a man targeting and murdering Asian women was just a good ol’ boy having a bad day.

19points

Susanne B 3 years ago

Hopefully he is not sheriff there anymore

0points

Draperdorf 3 years ago

Oh, well, that's alright then. Why didn't you just say so buddy?

10points

YourSecretSanta 3 years ago

I feel the same sometimes, without the shooting though

10points

Sweetpotato314 3 years ago

Not as bad of a day as the people he shot.

9points

Katy McMouse Premium 3 years ago

If this was a valid response to the majority of my days, I'd be the world's most prolific serial killer.

9points

Jenniffer Plourde 3 years ago

I know right?! If I killed one person for every 'bad day' in my life... ( I'm 53) Crazy!!

1point

My O My Premium 3 years ago

We all have these days...we don't use guns but binge ice-cream instead

8points

Catlover129 3 years ago

Awe...poor baby. Give him some cookies and milk. THEN shoot his freaking brains out in public!

6points

Daniel Yamada 3 years ago

He doesn't like Mondays.

5points

Shaza Hardy 3 years ago

🤣🤣🤣

0points

Shelli Aderman 3 years ago (edited)

If he was Black, he’d be “unalived,” which, some could say, would be an even worse day…

4points

#43

Arizona Plans To Execute Prisoners With The Same Deadly Gas Used By The Nazis At Auschwitz, Documents Show

Final score:

134points

POST

loty moty 3 years ago

How many inmates are they planning to execute? Entire prison population?

70points

Katy McMouse Premium 3 years ago

That's a hell of a "one and done".

17points

olx 3 years ago

apparently arizona has higher capital sentencing rates, or at least used to

3points

Kalevra 3 years ago

Only the Jewish ones.

0points

Mr. Cinder 3 years ago

So...it's okay to use all the other ways they use to kill people but not the way the nazi's did because....? You're still killing people, but it's bad because the nazi's did it?

15points

Annabelle 3 years ago

To be clear I am against capital punishment, but zyklon B is a really horrible way to die

3points

Viktor 3 years ago

It was used because it’s cheap and very efficient, so I can see the point. Ethically and morally it’s a different story, but that’s true for the death sentence in general.

9points

Shayne Randlett 3 years ago

Stabbing is very efficient, and probably costs less...

1point

Mama Panda 3 years ago

To this day I still cannot understand why a convicted murderer has more rights than his/her victims. I have researched and read a lot of material that tries to explain it but I just don't get it. I believe that the execution should be in the same manner in which they killed their victims. If you are worried about the toll it would take on the executioner, then use convicted lifers without parole to carry out the sentence. So if a man rapes and strangles his victim, then he should be raped and strangled as well. While I understand that capital punishment is not a general deterrent but a specific one, I think it might have a slight impact knowing there isn't going to be an "easy" execution should one be caught and convicted. Just my opinion.

7points

Inga Viviane 3 years ago

Ever thought about wrong convictions? Not every prisoner for murder is actually a murderer. And is it really ok to have a government that murders people? If someone who is disabled or under the influence of drugs, is he or she responsible in the same manner than someone who murdered in cold blood?

2points

Ela 3 years ago

What about the impact on the person who must carry out the sentence? Have you considered what it is like to work an execution? It's actually bloody hard, and I only ever stood around providing security during. The people who pull the trigger often need therapy.

1point

Mistletoe 3 years ago

I can't believe someone has dared to voice this. Many of those murdered would probably beg to be murdered the easy way their killers will be executed.

0points

Pizzagirl 91 3 years ago

It's more logical when you understand they have not more rights than their victims, but the SAME rights their victims had in the eye of the law. If we took the rights of someone convicted for a crime (which, as others said, still doesn't mean they 100% did it), it would negate the reasons we have established universal human rights, and bring us as a society closer to the murderer, who also chose - based on his perception - to take away someone's rights for "good reasons". It's basically that these rights and laws are for everyone, whether they be kings, or peasants, or children, or convicts, otherwise they might as well not exist.

0points

Jenniffer Plourde 3 years ago

There have been so many wrongful convictions and innocent people have been put to death. That is so wrong. But if someone is without a doubt, unequivocally guilty I absolutely agree. A pedophile should be locked in a room with Mama Bear!

0points

Karen Tape 3 years ago

Could always let the families of the victims do it. I don't think they'd mind one bit...

-1point

CakeandNintendo 3 years ago

Honestly I'm all for a death penalty when the crime includes murder, rape or pedophilia

5points

madbakes 3 years ago

I wouldn't be so opposed if our system was more reliable as to not convict innocent people

24points

cry_time 3 years ago

I thought we were done with this?! Alright, moving to Canada.

4points

Shelli Aderman 3 years ago

😳

2points

DubstepBlade 3 years ago

… No!

2points

YELLING!!! 3 years ago

Execute them? Don't you mean giving them showers?

2points

idrow1 3 years ago

Why don't they just them a large dose of fentanyl? They'd go out peacefully and it would get the job done every time. I don't understand why they haven't figured out a simple and humane form of execution. Hell, even a bullet to the back of the head would be instant and cheap.

2points

#44

Mike Pence Once Ratted Out His Fraternity Brothers For Having A Keg

Final score:

129points

POST

Lynda Birch 3 years ago

Snitches get stitches

92points

Pamela Worthington-Smack 3 years ago

You are ignoring the incontrovertible evidence of the precise opposite.

2points

Carolyn Risling 3 years ago

That's hysterical . . . . . .

0points

ButFirstCoffee 3 years ago

This comment has been deleted.

0points

Reinaldo Fuentes 3 years ago

How the heck did that refrigerated pillar of salt get into a frat???

23points

Nonna_SoF 3 years ago

Money.

4points

General Anaesthesia 3 years ago (edited)

Supreme Court justice Brett Kavanaugh still hasn't forgiven him.

11points

JL 3 years ago

And yet he kept his mouth shut for far worse over 4 years.

8points

idrow1 3 years ago

How do the worst people always end up so successful?

8points

Katy McMouse Premium 3 years ago

Of course he did.

5points

keighterz 3 years ago

This is probably the most Mike Pence thing ever

4points

Nazda Pokmov 3 years ago

He started his govt career early?

2points

ADDee 3 years ago

What a shock!!!

2points

HamGoblin 3 years ago

Sounds about right.

1point

#45

Mark Zuckerberg Says Meta Employees “Lovingly” Refer To Him As “The Eye Of Sauron”

Final score:

129points

POST

Lauren Copland 3 years ago

.Lovingly.

104points

over it already 3 years ago

Shows his true understanding of human emotion.

49points

John 3 years ago

human sarcasm is not something a robot or lizard understands.

15points

smugdruggler 3 years ago

😆😂🤣😂

0points

Ravenclaw Banana 3 years ago

How rude to Sauron

21points

Thee8thsense 3 years ago

Sir Sphincter seems so much more fitting.

17points

Chris Yuen 3 years ago

He still looks more artificial than the eye...

15points

Random Person 3 years ago

Agreed.

4points

RezFidel 3 years ago

Unzuck yourselfes... delete all meta apps. I promise your life gets better.

12points

JoyfulZebra 3 years ago

Unzucking now...

2points

ShellsBells 3 years ago

He looks like a soulless robot.

11points

Donkeywheel 3 years ago

An actual sociopath.

10points

Shane S 3 years ago

Proof that money doesn’t buy attractiveness. I can’t think of a good looking billionaire. Do you know any?

5points

MoMcB 3 years ago

He looks like he paints his head now

3points

JL 3 years ago

He seems more like a Gollum to me.

4points

Julie Ann Al buzbeba 3 years ago

Looks more like an a*****e to me .....

4points

#46

People Are Accusing Robinhood Of Stealing From The Poor To Give To The Rich After It Limited Trading On Gamestop Shares

Final score:

128points

POST

Kate Jones 3 years ago

This was so crazy. There should have been an investigation into this if you ask literally anyone. If we were Bill Ackman or Warren Buffet making the moves, they wouldn't bat an eye but because it was the little guy it was suspended for 'protecting the market'. At least they got fined but it was still not enough.

4points

Kel_how 3 years ago

Isn't that just capitalism?

2points

Linda HS 3 years ago

….so…tRump?

0points

Momus 3 years ago

How old are these headlines?

0points

#47

Amazon Admits Its Drivers Sometimes Have To Pee In Bottles

Final score:

121points

POST

Serial pacifist 3 years ago

I hope they offer a sip to Jeff Bezos.

131points

Kel_how 3 years ago

It should lovingly be referred to as "Amazon lemonade"

21points

Kathryn Baylis 3 years ago (edited)

Special lemonade, Jeffy. Drink up! Got a real kick to it, right?

2points

Jordi Sharpe 3 years ago

He just weird enough that he might accept.

2points

JuniorCJ82 3 years ago

They should violently throw it over the gates to his house, a la the delivery people who always make it on the news.

0points

François Bouzigues 3 years ago

Correct me if i am wrong, but it is not only Amazon. All the freigthers that come to our office because we do have an open restroom policy. And it seems it is not so common

11points

Catlover129 3 years ago

I have to assume this would be the same problem with every delivery driver for every delivery service including FedEx, UPS, USPS, DoorDash.....

6points

Kate Jones 3 years ago (edited)

I worked at Amazon and it's not that we or the drivers can't find the bathroom...we know where it is and you can find one out driving around. We just can't stop and go because we literally have to wear monitors/have monitors in the truck that detect when we've stopped moving and where we are. And if we go to the bathroom you get like 2 minutes and the bathroom can be a football field away. You can't even walk to it in 2 minutes. Someone will literally come get you, even in the bathroom. If you're a driver you get called. It's ridiculous. I get not wanting people to slack but can we not just set up more bathrooms? Or have a card swipe in the truck and take a bathroom break and swipe our cards to log back in when we are done. I work at a bank and when I go to the bathroom, that's almost exactly what we do-we just do it on a computer. We have to swipe our cards at amazon for everything so.. this isn't that difficult to set up. If it ends up being an unreasonable amount of time every day taken on bathroom breaks the supervisors could always discipline people.

5points

Julie 3 years ago

Thank you for clarifying. I was thinking they literally had trouble, but I was a landscaper and we had to find public restrooms on the way from one job to another so was like, oh. yeah. But if they're timing watching and timing them, not cool. And who gets to consider what's excessive? My job monitors how often we step away and so I literally looked up what was a normal number of times to urinate in a day.

2points

Colin Timp 3 years ago

The problem isn't a lack of restrooms (although that can be a problem), it's not getting the time to use one.

3points

Petra Moon 3 years ago

How would a female driver do that?

2points

Tofu 3 years ago

We use a cup, like a Starbucks cup for example.

5points

DforDory 3 years ago

No s**t?

1point

Lauren Copland 3 years ago

Sorry if your parcel smells a bit...

1point

backatya 3 years ago

just pee on the tire

0points

Hugh Willie Mungous 3 years ago

Of course . . . . . if they didn't drive them as hard as pit ponies . . . . . . . . . .

0points

#48

J.k. Rowling's New Book, About A Character Accused Of Transphobia, Raises Eyebrows

Final score:

118points

POST

Mayra 3 years ago

You mean her diary

156points

James Edwards 3 years ago

Made me chuckle +1

22points

N C 3 years ago

You mean how she doesn't want women only spaces eliminated from the planet?

5points

Molly Arwood 3 years ago

lol yes

-1point

Hugh Willie Mungous 3 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Asif 3 years ago

Hell I'm trans and I don't think it's transphobic to say that there is such a thing as biological women.

59points

Anouk T 3 years ago

Thank YOU!!!

8points

Remi (He/Him) 3 years ago (edited)

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

asexualotl (she/her) 3 years ago

i agree with you! but this specific person said a few additional things that were problematic, that's all :)

0points

Dre Mosley 3 years ago

What she said wasn't wrong just because you're offended.

26points

Porpoisepower 3 years ago

She whom must not be named.

13points

Anouk T 3 years ago

Wondering how many of those who cancelled her actually read her essay where she commits this terrible crime of… telling the truth.

9points

Sterling Hill 3 years ago

“ In the book, a popular artist gets harassed for her opinions” because these days you must not have any opinions that differ from anyone else’s, yeah ? Free speech is ok only if you are not saying anything bad about anyone.

3points

Nonna_SoF 3 years ago

Oh, and it's going to be under the pen name of the person who invented Conversion "Therapy".

2points

Shelli Aderman 3 years ago

🤣

2points

Lisa-Marie Dhondt 3 years ago

It was in the C.B. Strike series and if you’d actually read it (it’s a detective thriller) you’d know that is absolutely nowhere near true.

1point

LE Hunter 3 years ago

The headline is reporting about a new book.

1point

Reinaldo Fuentes 3 years ago

Harry Potter and the TRUE identity of Dolores Umbridge (insert picture of J.K. Cowling, and no, that's not a typo)

0points

#49

Gamestop Is Having A Tiktok Competition For Its Employees And One Of The Prizes Is 10 Extra Labor Hours

Final score:

103points

POST

Paul Haynes 3 years ago

For those the don’t speak retail. Stores are given hours weekly for payroll. At GS the district manager also gets some extra hours to divide between stores as he see fit. An extra 10 hours is 2 people in the store that day. As it is though Black Friday isn’t bad at GS. They day after Christmas is hell though

6points

Colin Timp 3 years ago

Every day is hell in retail. Holidays are a special lower circle of hell. The crappy part is that even if stores are under budget on hours, overtime is usually still not allowed. They just make the employees work harder while the company pockets the labor cost saved. And they wonder why people are either fleeing these jobs or unionizing.

4points

JL 3 years ago

"The TikToks will continue until morale improves."

3points

Colin Timp 3 years ago

This is why so many retailers are unionizing. It's not just pay and benefits; it's also staffing. Expecting 2 people to do the work of 4-5 for no extra money. Then they have the audacity to make their employees "earn" the help they should already have.

2points

Mike Crow 3 years ago

My wife’s store had something similar but it was extra labour but being paid for extra hours. So if you won you got paid an extra eight hours (but you don’t work it).

2points

Bean 3 years ago

How on Earth is that a prize?

2points

Billy Harrelson 3 years ago

Means they can have one more employee on hand to work that 10 hour shift.

3points

Pamela Worthington-Smack 3 years ago (edited)

Just as it requires mass unemployment and destructive boom and bust cycles, capitalism demands that labor always be a buyer's market to the most extreme degree possible. Ideally, millions of Americans would kill each other in the attempt to earn less than a living wage, eliminating the dangerous social unrest that sometimes occurs among the unemployed. Our neofeudal corporate Lords fear nothing more than their serfs turning to bite the hands that fail to feed them.

1point

Orbitale 3 years ago

I really struggle to understand how everybody in this country seems to found this "normal" like corporations can s**t on your head, and you should be grateful for that... But it's maybe because I'm French ...

1point

Calvin Smelliott 3 years ago

I would be happy with 10 free hours.

0points

J. Emery Anderson 3 years ago

Beatings will cease when morale improves. 👹

0points

Milano1015385 3 years ago

The one game that everyone tries to lose

0points

#50

Trump Dedicates Golf Trophy To Hurricane Victims

Final score:

103points

POST

DforDory 3 years ago

How generous.

103points

Paul Neff 3 years ago

Tone deaf poster child...

12points

Kel_how 3 years ago

It really improved morale and personal circumstances, I'm sure

2points

Andrea Steinacher 3 years ago

well, you only have to keep it in good shape for some hundred years and it will be prizeless lol

0points

idrow1 3 years ago

My blood pressure spikes every time I see that scumbag's face.

16points

Thee8thsense 3 years ago

Did he include a roll of paper towels?

15points

M Kawai 3 years ago

No, those were gifted to the families of the 9/11 victims who protested at Bedminster.

7points

Kim Lorton 3 years ago

He is the epitome of all nastiness and self entitlement.

7points

Leo Domitrix 3 years ago

How about he donates the truth?

7points

Michael Largey 3 years ago

Trump donating the truth would be like Superman donating kryptonite.

9points

Nonna_SoF 3 years ago

He has none to give.

1point

Susanne B 3 years ago

How would he be able to do that, when he obviosly doesn't know it

0points

Colin Timp 3 years ago

Has he collected money to give to himself? Seems to be the M.O.

6points

Paul Richards 3 years ago

Is there any aspect of this jerk that isn't shityy

6points

Upper Enchilada 3 years ago

F-ing idiot.

6points

Pamela Worthington-Smack 3 years ago

Adding insult to injury is just one of his many talents.

5points

Poultry Geist 3 years ago

He offered paper towels to Puerto Ricans after hurricane🤦🏻‍♀️

4points

#51

Gamestop Rules Itself 'Essential Retail' And Therefore Immune To Lockdown Closures

Final score:

21points

POST

Tamra 3 years ago

Greedy, selfish bastards.

13points

Brenda Spagnola-Wilson 3 years ago

Um...No

1point

JuniorCJ82 3 years ago

Go to a meeting and everybody cough on the boss.

0points

Nazda Pokmov 3 years ago

Essential to who? 10 year old boys?

0points

Kate Jones 3 years ago

This is what so many companies are doing now. I don't understand the criteria for being able to claim you are essential and who approves it but it's crazy.

0points

#52

Reddit CEO Tells User, “We Are Not The Thought Police,” Then Suspends That User

Final score:

17points

POST

Jason Marin 3 years ago

Reddit and their bullsh*t "community guidelines". One of their rules when posting anything to reddit is to keep it civil yet, I've seen many rude, snarky, insensitive and hurtful remarks but Reddit does nothing about them.

4points

Dirk Daring 3 years ago

Why does he look like Shooter McGavin.

2points

Seabeast 3 years ago

This story on the same page was more appalling. __ https://arstechnica.com/science/2022/09/being-a-victim-of-rape-costs-an-average-of-3500-in-medical-bills-study-finds/

0points