Girlfriend’s Rude Italian-American Family Make Fun Of Her Boyfriend, Are Surprised When He Roasts Them With Fluent Italian

My parents are Italian and I speak it very well but I don't call myself Italian because I'm English, Italians laugh at the Americans who call themselves Italians.

They aren't Italian. They are American.

We had a huge Italian and Greek immigration influx in my country in the 50s and 60s and it completely changed the food and coffee culture, which was a great thing. But the original immigrants great and great-great grandchildren still identify as Greek and Italian first, and Australian second. Similar to this story. In world sporting events where the two countries are playing each other, they’ll barrack for their ancestors team for example. And like this story, very few of them speak their ancestors language. I don’t judge, but it does make me curious as to the reasons why. A lot of them have never even visited Italy or Greece, as there are no longer living relatives there.

Sounds to me like the girlfriend found herself quite a catch - he's smart, he keeps his cool when provoked, and he's hilarious!

I will probably never understand why some US Americans are so vehement about their "heritage", when they are just the great great whatever of someone from xyz. I'm sorry, but no, you are not Italian or whatever. You were born in the US, you speak only American English. You are US American! Nothing more. You've got xyz ancestors. That's it. Hell. I was BORN in Poland and DO SPEAK Polish. I spent every summer there up until I was 17. But I've lived in Germany since I was 3. I went to School here, I married a German, I speak, think and dream in German. My customs and mannerisms are German. My worldview is German. For my part I AM a German, not a Pole. For me it's laughable that people who have never been to a specific country, who don't really know anything about that country and don't even speak the language claim they are from there. They would be a laughing stock if they ever went there and behaved like that

Third and fourth generation immigrants use their Italian heritage as a lifestyle opposed to a culture. It’s just some elitist bull c**p.

Saying that you are of Italian/Irish/whatever heritage is saying that you are a cobbler because your great-grandfather was a cobbler.

These guys sound like they've watched too many mafia films or Jersey Shore episodes. This was satisfying to read.

Lol they're not Italians. And boyfriend's response was epic. Pretty sure assholes didn't expect something like that.

In the US, some take an inordinate amount of pride in their ethnic background—to the point that it becomes their identity—even though they literally have no connection to that culture (don't speak the language, have never been to the country). While there's absolutely nothing wrong with celebrating your ethnic background, it shouldn't be used as an excuse for poor behavior.

So the men in her family are loud, tell it like it is… dish it out but can’t take it snowflakes? Lol

Never understood the desire to grasp at being something you aren’t, nor the bizarre patriotic fervour that the U.S. embraces. I’m proud of my family and who we are but it’s not defined by where our forefathers (and mothers) came from. If you are born in a country and hold a passport or are documented as being from there then that (with a few exceptions, military children, children whose parents were or are abroad with work etc) is where you are from, you are American with Italian, Irish, German whatever roots. You don’t magically gain dual nationality. Be proud of your nation and what you bring to it but drop the whole split nationality thing eh? PS the ‘we are xyz because of our history’ is b******t, it’s an excuse for poor behaviour.

NO! NO! NO! You are NTA. If being of Italian stock is truly important, they would learn the language. If only to show they are not DUMB Americans. The rest of the world sees the people.of the USA as dumb because "we" expect the world to learn English, while we don't need to learn a second language. If the men in this family are truly macho, then they need to learn how to read, write, and speak Italian. Real macho men are afraid of nothing.

My dad was not a stupid person, but you could be forgiven for thinking he was. He always thought of himself as Italian because he had one grandmother who immigrated from Sicily. Meanwhile he had English, German and Swedish heritage that he didn't give a c**p about. For a while he was obsessed with Paris and took several trips to France. I asked him why he didn't go to Italy and he said, "I grew up in Brooklyn, I've seen Italy." (One of his stupider comments.) Then he took a DNA test and boy, was he mad when he came up 0% Italian! I told him, "You were never Italian, you were Sicilian! And barely that." He did come up as partly Iberian, which makes some sense; almost every country in the Mediterranean had a piece of Sicily at one time or another. I always call myself American because there are few other places where you can end up English/German/Swedish/Dutch/Scotch -Irish/Sicilian/Ashkenazi Jewish, and I haven't had an ancestor come here since the 1890s. What else would I be?

This is great! Hope you, girlfriend, and granddad hang out without the rest of them

I bet grandpa is stoked he can finally talk to someone in Italian instead of conversing in English with his shithead progeny.

dude keep thes GF

the bf put them on their right place. language is a big part of ones heritage.

Ah yes, the good old "i tell it like i see it". What that actually means us youre an a*****e and dont give a f**k about anyone else. Having a mouth brain filter us not a bad thing, knowing when to shut up is one if the most underrated and important skills in human society. You can just tell everyone exactly what you think, but then dont be surprised when everyone treats you like an idiot because its obvious you have no social intelligence and are basically showing all your cards, stupidly thinking that somehow youre too good to lose even then. And well, thats what happened here, they got eloquently exposed as morons.

whatever you do to italians, you're excused.

Call 'em "pazzo" every time they bring it up, and in three weeks, you'll all be best friends.

I am a first generation Sicilian American. I am fiercely proud of both of my homelands and heritages. I think people are leaving out an important factor; that the family is / resides in NJ. It is well known that NY / NJ residents have an edge to them. What can be construed as joking to one can be interpreted as an insult to others. In today's world it was likely in poor taste that the family bantered about leading to laughter at the boyfriend's expense. There is typically an unwritten period of testing and prodding that may ensue during initial meetings. Simply to see how one would react and, to a lessor extent, establishing a foundation for a social pecking order. As is the case in many cultures, the wisdom of the elders was correct.

Most people who call themselves Italian are far removed from the country and native Italians. From what I saw decades ago people attempted to keep up the language.

Lol you know it's good when Grandpa approves!

"We tell it like it is!" is the way jerks justify being assholes but are too scared to actually admit it.

A hallmark of Americans (and I am American) is that we cling to our ancestry very tightly. You ask and American "what are you?" and you will get "Well, I'm 55% Scottish, 20% Irish, 10% Italian, 5% German, 5% Taiwanese, 3% Greek, 2% Nigerian." We will celebrate every one of those cultures in equal measure.

Bottom line: they're jerks and use their heritage as an excuse.

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My family is Italian-American, and yeah, I call myself that. I don't understand the issue with it. My heritage is important and our family keeps up the traditions from back in the country they hailed from originally. If you say "American" only, folks think certain things because humans will be human. Add the back country you come from and they perhaps will understand a little more about you.

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So, as an Italian (a real one, born and raised in Italy, far away from New Jersey), let me understand: if they could speak Italian they were allowed to behave like bullies? Is that what the OP wants to imply? If they could speak Italian then their Italian heritage was a good enough excuse for being assholes? That’s what comes out of the story. First of all, those are not Italians, they are ignorant Americans and they most probably never even been in Italy once. They learned what it means to be Italian for their uneducated grandfather who probably left the south when he was a dirt poor kid without shoes, 70 years ago. Secondly, the OP is indeed an a*s*ole, not for speaking Italian to them, but for thinking their ability to speak it would qualify them as Italian enough to act like jerks. All a-hole in this story.