Woman Refuses To Help Parents Going Through Financial Crisis Because She Was Disowned By Them 9 Years Ago
The importance of a loving and supporting family cannot be emphasized enough. When people get in trouble, they immediately turn to their family members for support. However, is it okay to expect support from someone whom you turned down when they were in need? Is it okay to expect support from a daughter you disowned many years ago for not being religious?
While most daughters would love to help their parents in need, Redditor u/Born-Problem-8280 refused to do so because she was disowned by them 9 years ago. OP (Original Poster) was feeling slightly guilty for not helping her parents who have medical conditions and are going through a bankruptcy phase. So, she turned to this popular subreddit and asked other users to know if she was right or wrong.
More info: Reddit
This woman got disowned by her religious parents because she became a stripper
Image credits: Francisco Osorio
Sometimes, rigid religious beliefs can break a family. It’s often seen that the kids of religious parents become rebellious and even against religion because they see their peers enjoying more social freedom and less-disciplined family environments. Therefore, they feel like there is something missing in their lives or that their parents are too strict to let them live their life their own way.
Image credits: u/Born-Problem-8280
She wanted to go to a normal college but her parents insisted her to go to a Christian college
The OP revealed that her parents were religious and wanted her to pursue education in a Christian college instead of a regular one. When she refused their idea and went to a normal college, her parents stopped paying her college tuition.
She joined a strip club to pay for her expenses
The woman made good money while working as a stripper but when her parents found out, they disowned her
As she was making good money with her job, she decided to quit college. As soon as her parents found out, they told her that she was unwanted in their family now. Even her relatives didn’t support her (except for two cousins). So, she probably felt lonely and rejected.
She is now well settled and doing well financially
The OP revealed that her financial condition is really good as of now. She is earning from various sources, and she owns a house, an apartment building, and a Tesla. She is perfectly able to help her parents but she doesn’t want to do so because of the treatment she got when she was young.
Her parents suffered bankruptcy and went to seek her help forgetting what they did to her years ago
Her parents contacted her 9 years later only when they were in trouble. OP mentioned that they declared bankruptcy and are struggling with some medical problems. But she refused to help them by saying that she doesn’t have parents anymore. She also pointed “according to their religion and church, my money was earned while sinning, so to use it is to damn your soul to hell and I really didn’t want that for them.”
She even gave the extended family a taste of their own medicine by telling them to help her parents themselves
Do you think that OP was wrong for refusing to help her parents? Let us know in the comments what would you do in her situation.
Image credits: David Dennis
Most people in the comments section have shown support to the OP and told her that she did the right thing because her parents made a choice years ago and didn’t even apologise to her about it.
I am getting so sick and tired of people using religion as a justification to mistreat other people, especially their family members. These same people that spout all of their hateful bigotry don't seem to understand that Jesus was Jewish, dark skinned, and from the Middle East. He was also friends with tax collectors and a prostitute. He didn't judge their lifestyle or mistreat them. This young woman does not owe her parents anything. To the Christian community:STOP USING RELIGION TO JUSTIFY BEING AN A-HOLE!!! You are making the rest of us look bad.
@deanna woods : This comment can rigorously apply to all religions without exception and not only the Christian religion.
This isn't just about religion. It can be applied many other aspects, like culture, way of living, ideologies, etc. When a person has belief in something, it is difficult for them to be able to think rationally.
This isn't new. I'm 52 and religion has been an excuse to mistreat people all through my lifetime (and since the dawn of time). The only difference is how much religion has infiltrated American politics (I can't speak for other countries but it seems the US is worse than other places). So don't be sick and tired of it. Fight it!
I'm an atheist and I have to struggle harder and harder to remind myself that it's not the religion itself that's a problem, it's the AH's using the religion as a tool to mistreat others. It seems like Christians in America are more and more being represented by hateful loudmouths, and the peaceful, loving Christians are silent and invisible. I only see atheists calling the loudmouths out on their BS. It's rare to see a Christian like you calling them out. I'd love to see more of the "good" Christians reprimanding the loudmouthed AH's.
@Brett Conner Bro what you high on XD
No child owes their parents anything. Why do parents offer a "gift" with provisions? Glad you are doing you and doing it well.
Yeah, you seem to be forgetting the part where Jesus told them to "go and sin no more." You also forget that He went out among the worst sinners to call them to repentance, not to shrug His shoulders and say "do whatever you want, just be nice to people." So yes, Jesus judged their lifestyles; He judged them as bad and urged them to turn away from their sins.
Mikayla Lynn, no, he didn't judge them as BAD he judged certain actions, and HE is the only one allowed to do that because HE knows their hearts. It is not our job to do so. He loved them no matter what and that is what we are charged to do
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Show me one dark skinned jew.
Wow...here I was thinking I might skate through today without encountering another ignorant bigot and...well, here you are. I suppose you, like so many so-called "Christians" believe that somehow Jesus could not have been dark-skinned because...well, dark skin equals less inferior. I even heard someone, probably the same type person as you Dorine, say that God would not have allowed Jesus to be dark-skinned. It's odd how the ignorant and hate filled manage to show up in just about every forum.
https://jwa.org/blog/plight-nigerian-jews You are welcome
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
Jesus never existed! Just a Money making scam by Jewish Freemasons. Made Trillions, killed Billions as planned.
When my children and I were in a desperate situation my sister forbade my parents to offer any help because I had "consorted with the enemy" by marrying rather than staying at home to "serve" them as she had. Many years later after my parents died my sister, who had inherited the house for her "service", was deeply in debt and expected me and my second husband to pay her debts and support her gambling and drinking habits. It is now over 20 years ago and i don't know or care what became of her. .
That is good. I'm sure she learned, hopefully, that she should be careful how she treats people. I would do the same things if one of my sisters did that. I mean, gambling, really?
I've found 'they' and this is a very generalize 'they' donot as you say 'learn', they want your 'help' to contiue their life style/thinking -They might say 'OH I have learned x,y or z but that is not what I've seen. That doesn't make them good or bad that is just how they see. treat life and it doesn't work for me and If You were in need and even if they could help, don't hold your breath because they would still be in there thinking process- People can change but it is a process. As for that 'Religious 'clap trap', it's just using Religion as an excuse for not doing what is right and I hear a LOT of 'judgement' and that judgement remained(s) along with manipulation, guilt her into it. As she noted the rest of this family 'talked' about what she 'should do BUT did not step up to help, so much for their Religious beliefs. (An this is the 1st. time in 9 years that they contacted her? wow) Did they offer her 1 sorry?
What? Your sister forbade you to get married? That sucks!
I'm sure that your sister probably sucks, but I'm pretty sure that there is a lot more information missing from this story. It sounds like maybe your family did not approve of who you married and when your marriage ended and left you and your kids in a bad spot your sister kept your parents from helping you. Which is really messed up because your kids didn't deserve that. And when she needed help you threw it back in her face. Nobody is innocent here.
I really appreciated the idea of sending them a one time gift and walking away guilt free. Particularly if their health and/or lives are endangered (ie, if they are American without health insurance). Them OP can give them the boost they need to help themselves (or not) and not feel awful if/when something happens.
Absolutely. She is not the AH but a lot can be said for a clear conscience. She already is feeling guilty and a month's pay that wouldn't hurt her would be worth sending just to assuage the guilt. As long as it has the caveat to never contact her again.
AND show them that helping the idiot parents is the christian thing to do .... So compassion and empathy is given and she (the daughter) is the one with christian grace. Amen.
See thing is, if it works they’ll definitely contact her again.
I agree but after the initial help hopefully she would be clear of conscience enough to be able to tell them to pound sand. 🤞
At $11,000 a week that works out to potentially $44,000 though. I mean, that's a lot of money for a-holes likes this.
No strings attached as far as attitude change or gratefulness, just no more contact
I would give it to them. And maybe I'd sign it, from the daughter that you disowned.
I totally agree. Yes, the parents suck, but they are also desperate, poor and ill. And they did feed her and raised her till she was a grown-up, unlike some other stories I've read on here.. Give them a one time sum and feel better about yourself.
I agree with S.Mi
I am getting so sick and tired of people using religion as a justification to mistreat other people, especially their family members. These same people that spout all of their hateful bigotry don't seem to understand that Jesus was Jewish, dark skinned, and from the Middle East. He was also friends with tax collectors and a prostitute. He didn't judge their lifestyle or mistreat them. This young woman does not owe her parents anything. To the Christian community:STOP USING RELIGION TO JUSTIFY BEING AN A-HOLE!!! You are making the rest of us look bad.
@deanna woods : This comment can rigorously apply to all religions without exception and not only the Christian religion.
This isn't just about religion. It can be applied many other aspects, like culture, way of living, ideologies, etc. When a person has belief in something, it is difficult for them to be able to think rationally.
This isn't new. I'm 52 and religion has been an excuse to mistreat people all through my lifetime (and since the dawn of time). The only difference is how much religion has infiltrated American politics (I can't speak for other countries but it seems the US is worse than other places). So don't be sick and tired of it. Fight it!
I'm an atheist and I have to struggle harder and harder to remind myself that it's not the religion itself that's a problem, it's the AH's using the religion as a tool to mistreat others. It seems like Christians in America are more and more being represented by hateful loudmouths, and the peaceful, loving Christians are silent and invisible. I only see atheists calling the loudmouths out on their BS. It's rare to see a Christian like you calling them out. I'd love to see more of the "good" Christians reprimanding the loudmouthed AH's.
@Brett Conner Bro what you high on XD
No child owes their parents anything. Why do parents offer a "gift" with provisions? Glad you are doing you and doing it well.
Yeah, you seem to be forgetting the part where Jesus told them to "go and sin no more." You also forget that He went out among the worst sinners to call them to repentance, not to shrug His shoulders and say "do whatever you want, just be nice to people." So yes, Jesus judged their lifestyles; He judged them as bad and urged them to turn away from their sins.
Mikayla Lynn, no, he didn't judge them as BAD he judged certain actions, and HE is the only one allowed to do that because HE knows their hearts. It is not our job to do so. He loved them no matter what and that is what we are charged to do
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
Show me one dark skinned jew.
Wow...here I was thinking I might skate through today without encountering another ignorant bigot and...well, here you are. I suppose you, like so many so-called "Christians" believe that somehow Jesus could not have been dark-skinned because...well, dark skin equals less inferior. I even heard someone, probably the same type person as you Dorine, say that God would not have allowed Jesus to be dark-skinned. It's odd how the ignorant and hate filled manage to show up in just about every forum.
https://jwa.org/blog/plight-nigerian-jews You are welcome
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
Jesus never existed! Just a Money making scam by Jewish Freemasons. Made Trillions, killed Billions as planned.
When my children and I were in a desperate situation my sister forbade my parents to offer any help because I had "consorted with the enemy" by marrying rather than staying at home to "serve" them as she had. Many years later after my parents died my sister, who had inherited the house for her "service", was deeply in debt and expected me and my second husband to pay her debts and support her gambling and drinking habits. It is now over 20 years ago and i don't know or care what became of her. .
That is good. I'm sure she learned, hopefully, that she should be careful how she treats people. I would do the same things if one of my sisters did that. I mean, gambling, really?
I've found 'they' and this is a very generalize 'they' donot as you say 'learn', they want your 'help' to contiue their life style/thinking -They might say 'OH I have learned x,y or z but that is not what I've seen. That doesn't make them good or bad that is just how they see. treat life and it doesn't work for me and If You were in need and even if they could help, don't hold your breath because they would still be in there thinking process- People can change but it is a process. As for that 'Religious 'clap trap', it's just using Religion as an excuse for not doing what is right and I hear a LOT of 'judgement' and that judgement remained(s) along with manipulation, guilt her into it. As she noted the rest of this family 'talked' about what she 'should do BUT did not step up to help, so much for their Religious beliefs. (An this is the 1st. time in 9 years that they contacted her? wow) Did they offer her 1 sorry?
What? Your sister forbade you to get married? That sucks!
I'm sure that your sister probably sucks, but I'm pretty sure that there is a lot more information missing from this story. It sounds like maybe your family did not approve of who you married and when your marriage ended and left you and your kids in a bad spot your sister kept your parents from helping you. Which is really messed up because your kids didn't deserve that. And when she needed help you threw it back in her face. Nobody is innocent here.
I really appreciated the idea of sending them a one time gift and walking away guilt free. Particularly if their health and/or lives are endangered (ie, if they are American without health insurance). Them OP can give them the boost they need to help themselves (or not) and not feel awful if/when something happens.
Absolutely. She is not the AH but a lot can be said for a clear conscience. She already is feeling guilty and a month's pay that wouldn't hurt her would be worth sending just to assuage the guilt. As long as it has the caveat to never contact her again.
AND show them that helping the idiot parents is the christian thing to do .... So compassion and empathy is given and she (the daughter) is the one with christian grace. Amen.
See thing is, if it works they’ll definitely contact her again.
I agree but after the initial help hopefully she would be clear of conscience enough to be able to tell them to pound sand. 🤞
At $11,000 a week that works out to potentially $44,000 though. I mean, that's a lot of money for a-holes likes this.
No strings attached as far as attitude change or gratefulness, just no more contact
I would give it to them. And maybe I'd sign it, from the daughter that you disowned.
I totally agree. Yes, the parents suck, but they are also desperate, poor and ill. And they did feed her and raised her till she was a grown-up, unlike some other stories I've read on here.. Give them a one time sum and feel better about yourself.
I agree with S.Mi