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Sexist Parents Demand Daughter Do Chores While Brothers Hang Out, Daughter Quits In Protest
Gender norms are crumbling fast these days, and we couldn’t be any happier. There’s just no sense in clinging to outdated ideas about what men and women should or shouldn’t be able to do. Sometimes, people still can’t wrap their heads around this fact.
One woman, whose parents expect her and her sister to do all the housework, recently stood up for herself and complained that her three brothers weren’t lifting a finger to help. Now she’s quit doing the chores in protest, but still wonders if that’s a jerk move.
More info: Reddit
RELATED:
Gender norms are being shattered daily, but this woman’s sexist parents don’t seem to have noticed
Image credits: The Yuri Arcurs Collection / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The family house needed a deep clean, so the woman suggested everyone pitch in and help out
Image credits: cottonbro studio / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Her mom said that was a great idea, and gave her and her sister chores to do, but not the woman’s three brothers
Image credits: Tima Miroshnichenko / Pexels (not the actual photo)
When the woman complained to her mom about the inequality, her mom said cleaning house was a girl’s job
Image credits: TherealYemmi
The woman said that it was unfair and quit cleaning in protest, but is now wondering if that makes her a jerk
When OP suggested a deep clean of the family house, she assumed it would be a team effort. Living at home with her parents, three brothers, and a younger sister, she figured sharing the load made sense. Her mom initially agreed, and the girls were assigned chores. Oddly, however, the brothers weren’t asked to help at all.
As OP vacuumed and her sister tidied, her brothers lounged in another room, totally off the hook. She waited for her mom to include them; after all, she’d agreed to the plan. When she asked why the boys weren’t contributing, though, her mother dismissed her concerns. Instead of fairness, she was told to be quiet and get to work.
Things got worse when the OP pointed out the unfairness. Her mother, visibly upset, claimed she was acting shamefully. “They’re boys. You and your sister are girls. This is your job,” her mom said, despite previously agreeing that the boys should help. It turns out fairness wasn’t the priority—gender roles were. And the boys? They’re still glued to their screens playing video games.
That’s when OP decided enough was enough. She stopped doing chores entirely. Her father mocked her, and her mother labeled her lazy and disrespectful. Her protest sparked outrage, but she wasn’t trying to be rebellious – she just wanted equality. Now she’s left asking an online community if standing up for herself makes her the bad guy.
From what the OP tells us in her post, her parents are fine with perpetuating gender inequality. Perhaps that’s just how they were brought up, but the OP is well within her rights to rock this particular boat—it’s 2025, after all. So, what can she do to enlighten her parents and promote fairness in her family? We went looking for answers.
Image credits: namii9 / Freepik (not the actual photo)
According to the UN Women website, traditional notions of masculinity often discourage men from engaging in care and domestic work, as well as from communicating their emotions in open, healthy ways. Challenging such notions, which is key to fostering equality, starts at home.
According to the Psychology Today website, family quarrels, grudges, and estrangement can have lasting effects, sometimes following members into old age. In a dysfunctional home, there is normally no sense of unity, empathy, or boundaries, and family members can be highly critical of one another.
In his article for the Educational Foundation for Children’s Care, Leon B. Wellington suggests a few ways to encourage gender equality in the home, including encouraging open conversations, sharing household responsibilities equally, challenging stereotypes in media and books, and encouraging empathy and respect.
It looks like OP is going to need to sit the whole family down for a not-so-little chat about fair play and outdated gender norms. Anything less, and she’s just going to stay stuck in the same dysfunctional situation until she moves out.
In the comments, readers agreed that the original poster was not being the jerk in the situation, and some even suggested she move out
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What do you think ?
Lila Allen 8 months ago
Get your stuff together. If possible get a job where you wouldn't need to be able to drive and there was decent public transport. Get an apartment. Get out and then offer your little sister a way out as well. Leave your parents to tend to the man babies they made who contribute nothing.
Vinnie 8 months ago
Holy cow, are the sons house pets?? What happens when the parents are too old to look after them or they've used up their retirement savings? At the very least, the parents should have small tents and sleeping bags for then the wee lads have to fend for themselves. I'm sure a kind passerby will be able to buy them a coffee so they can use the cup for further donations.
TeenieMeanie 8 months ago
My mom tried to do this with me, I pointed it was my brother, my father, and our two male boarders who were making messes everywhere. My mother said how would I ever catch a husband with this attitude. Joke’s on her, I got me a wonderful husband who keeps house much better thsn I could. I also don’t talk to my mother.
Ms.GB 8 months ago
This is what my parents expected also and I grew up in the US in the 80s. They only expected my brother to take out the trash which he always conveniently forgot to do. I helped my mom do dishes, laundry, scrub bathtubs, fold clothes, put away clothes, cleaned toilets, make beds, vacuumed, set the table, cleared the tables, washed windows, swept, dusted, picked up after the dirty a*s guys, cooked, scrubbed walls, scrubbed baseboards, cleaned out fridges and cupboards, cleaned up after the pets, did the shopping, ironed shirts, raked leaves, planted and watered the garden, and all the other tons of little things that people who never do them don't even notice get done. I could go on forever. I hate it when I ask someone to help clean and they're like "What do you want me to do?" LOOK AROUND! I promise you that if people live there, there is always something that needs to be done. Pretend you're at your bosses house. I promise you aren't that useless if you can hold down a job.
For Work 8 months ago
Get out of that house and cut ties with everyone but little sister. Your parents and brothers will always treat you like garbage and you deserve better. When you move do not give them your address or tell them where you work so they cannot bother you. If they'd ike to meet for coffee or something- fine. But you get out and help your little sister when the time comes. Your lazy a*s brothers are losers and will always be and I hope they drain your parents the rest of their miserable lives.
For Work 8 months ago
And- if you ever want to get married you better tell the other person that you expect them to do half of dishes, shopping, laundry, vacuuming, etc or it's not going to happen. Thankfully my husband was helpful from the start!
Load More Replies...
murmelinpaiva 8 months ago
Sign yourself up for driving school. On my sixth lesson I got my license (US). Of course if you are Muslim your parents might not let you even go out in a car with a strange man.
Vinnie 8 months ago
The parents do sound a tad backwards (most Muslim parents at my workplace are not). If they're strict, female instructors do exist. As do Muslim instructors.
Load More Replies...
Canadadreams 8 months ago
Ur brothers will end up getting divorced by their wives… all bcz of ur brainless parents
Kate Johnson 8 months ago
What a terrible mother raising worthless sons that will be terrible husbands. She'll be a nightmare MIL.
Lila Allen 8 months ago
Get your stuff together. If possible get a job where you wouldn't need to be able to drive and there was decent public transport. Get an apartment. Get out and then offer your little sister a way out as well. Leave your parents to tend to the man babies they made who contribute nothing.
Vinnie 8 months ago
Holy cow, are the sons house pets?? What happens when the parents are too old to look after them or they've used up their retirement savings? At the very least, the parents should have small tents and sleeping bags for then the wee lads have to fend for themselves. I'm sure a kind passerby will be able to buy them a coffee so they can use the cup for further donations.
TeenieMeanie 8 months ago
My mom tried to do this with me, I pointed it was my brother, my father, and our two male boarders who were making messes everywhere. My mother said how would I ever catch a husband with this attitude. Joke’s on her, I got me a wonderful husband who keeps house much better thsn I could. I also don’t talk to my mother.
Ms.GB 8 months ago
This is what my parents expected also and I grew up in the US in the 80s. They only expected my brother to take out the trash which he always conveniently forgot to do. I helped my mom do dishes, laundry, scrub bathtubs, fold clothes, put away clothes, cleaned toilets, make beds, vacuumed, set the table, cleared the tables, washed windows, swept, dusted, picked up after the dirty a*s guys, cooked, scrubbed walls, scrubbed baseboards, cleaned out fridges and cupboards, cleaned up after the pets, did the shopping, ironed shirts, raked leaves, planted and watered the garden, and all the other tons of little things that people who never do them don't even notice get done. I could go on forever. I hate it when I ask someone to help clean and they're like "What do you want me to do?" LOOK AROUND! I promise you that if people live there, there is always something that needs to be done. Pretend you're at your bosses house. I promise you aren't that useless if you can hold down a job.
For Work 8 months ago
Get out of that house and cut ties with everyone but little sister. Your parents and brothers will always treat you like garbage and you deserve better. When you move do not give them your address or tell them where you work so they cannot bother you. If they'd ike to meet for coffee or something- fine. But you get out and help your little sister when the time comes. Your lazy a*s brothers are losers and will always be and I hope they drain your parents the rest of their miserable lives.
For Work 8 months ago
And- if you ever want to get married you better tell the other person that you expect them to do half of dishes, shopping, laundry, vacuuming, etc or it's not going to happen. Thankfully my husband was helpful from the start!
Load More Replies... murmelinpaiva 8 months ago
Sign yourself up for driving school. On my sixth lesson I got my license (US). Of course if you are Muslim your parents might not let you even go out in a car with a strange man.
Vinnie 8 months ago
The parents do sound a tad backwards (most Muslim parents at my workplace are not). If they're strict, female instructors do exist. As do Muslim instructors.
Load More Replies... Canadadreams 8 months ago
Ur brothers will end up getting divorced by their wives… all bcz of ur brainless parents
Kate Johnson 8 months ago
What a terrible mother raising worthless sons that will be terrible husbands. She'll be a nightmare MIL.
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