35 Outrageous Job Requirements That Made People Nope Out (New Pics)

Logic checks out. Turnabout is fair play.

That went to unexpected, positive direction!

Competitive in the race to the bottom.

they will hire because promoting would mean losing somebody who actually knows how to do the job and is a good leader accepted by the whole team as such and we can never have people like that in management.

You mean I've been working with a smile for without charging extra this whole time?!

Duh…

Minimum wage, part time, no benefits but must have a masters. We're all going to die.

If I'm looking for work I'm applying EVERYWHERE. I'm not going to twiddle my thumbs while someone hmms and haws over my resume for two weeks.

This is exactly how Donald Trump got every job he ever had before The Apprentice. That may be the only job he EVER interviewed for.

exactly

As you should be.

Hitchhike right outta there

Yeah. But then it is already too late, as you are sitting in the damn interview.

Regina Phalange.

It's a bit harsh if one's internet crashes. The smart ones will use their mobile as a point of presence if required.

Ha! Well done. We need to be bold like that

She shouldn't have been so mean to clowns. ;)

👋🏼

The place I worked in Tucson was bought out - new workers were making more than their managers; when complaints were lodged, HR responded "the squeaky wheel gets fired"

I hate this game!! Just tell us the salary range up front!!!!!

Tracks

Boss: Come back! I'm buying pizza for everyone!

I understand British but wth is A British? Is that like a Danish?

I keep getting calls from recruiters. Recruiter: "You are a great fit"? Me: "What is the salary range?" Recruiter: "$XX.00/hour" Me: "That is half of what I am making now."

If you can't afford to live on the pay they are offering, then it's time to look elsewhere. Kinda there with my job. They cut my hours while I'm moving house. If I can't make it work by January, I'm gone.

Dopes

Wow 😳

I have a *colourful* CV and call centre was hands down my worst job. And I've expressed dogs' a**l glands with my bare hands for a living, so there's that.

Questions like this are designed to see how you handle stress. Any answer is acceptable. If you freeze up, that tells them something. If you answer with humour, that tells them something. If you ask follow up questions about how many seatbelts are on the bus, that tells them something. It's like a personality test. Just give a random number if you can't come up with a witty response. Every interview I've ever had included a nonsense question. If I rejected every company for this reason, I wouldn't have a job.

"View the attached CV"

Probably means, "up to" $14 an hour.

No females? I am a female CDL driver. I have logged over one million miles - accident/incident free. I have never had a load refused. What is it about gender that offends? Because I pee sitting down?

If it was urgent, she'd have scheduled an interview a month ago.

What a moron. I totally would have responded NOON in all caps. And then maybe noon = 12pm.

If demand is so much higher than supply why do you complain at all, greedy bastard?

Good for Verizon and Samsung getting advertising in here. Can't believe the recruiter didn't change that signature

No.

When people say their company is "like family," they mean a dysfunctional, toxic family.

20 years with a Fortune 500 Medical Device company. Laid off over the phone while I was seeing patients!

That doesn't look like a walk in.

They'd have trouble arranging calls with most of my former bosses unless they were willing to conduct seances. (Age related, I didn't bump them all off!!)

So "All Inclusive" means "And That's It". Gotcha.

Just have a template ready and copy-paste it as needed.

This is an incompetent management team. No company that is worth working for is that bad at basic tasks like hiring employees. Maybe the person who normally handles that is ill or overworked - the company should find someone to take over. If they can't do that, imagine what they would be like managing workloads and payments.

In my line of work we have positions for driving branded tow trucks. Yet a huge amount of applicants either have suspended or no drivers license! We finally had to add “holding a current valid drivers license required". DUH!

So many times.

I smell PIGS - as in Male Chauvinist Pigs. (My apologies to the world's population of swine.)

Wow okay to you too recrapper.

It looks like they should have been mindful of grammar lessons and how they type before pressing "Send".

As a worker, ALWAYS trade UP. No point in even interviewing if they are offering less than what you're already getting and if they are scared to state their offering, they are paying less than you're probably worth.

The next panel is the turquoise shirted idiot sliding prone along the urinals because Fist of Death was employed.

Oh, that one in Nigeria?

I possess full knowledge that I don't want to experience working there.

"work hard play hard" leaves surprisingly little time or energy to play

Maybe they feel the recipient would be a really good match and they are keen to get them on board? Not everything is aggressive.

Pfft! Jeans. Can I wear my track pants to work?

This is pretentious, patronising b******t, and inaccurate too - both of their examples are myths. Also there are grammatical errors. I would resent working for people this smug.

We had someone apply to us with a really rude email cannot remember now, but ladyshagger or something similar, that went straight in the bin.

ripping... what is this, the early 2000s?