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Woman Asks All Close Friends To Be Her Bridesmaid, Except For One And Shares Her Controversial Reason
Woman looking upset while discussing bridesmaid choices with friends in a kitchen setting, highlighting bridesmaid controversy.

Woman Asks All Close Friends To Be Her Bridesmaid, Except For One And Shares Her Controversial Reason

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Weddings can be a costly affair, and not just for the couple getting married. Nowadays, it’s the norm for the bridal party to cover certain expenses like their own dresses, suits, or pre-wedding parties. According to The Knot, the average bachelorette party costs a cool $1,300.

A bride has made a rather controversial decision to not ask one of her close friends to be a bridesmaid because “she is poor.” The woman says she’s not in the mood to hear whining about money ahead of her big day. Of course, her decision has left more than a few feathers ruffled.

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    She’s asked all of her closest friends from college to be her bridesmaid, except for one

    Image credits: Alena Darmel / Pexels (not the actual photo)

    This bride says the friend is “poor” and she’s not keen to hear her “whining about money” ahead of the wedding

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    Image credits: Tima Miroshnichenko / Pexels (not the actual photo)

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    Image credits: Liza Summer / Pexels (not the actual photo)

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    Image credits: Weddin_Secretary5876

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    People wanted more details, specifically about the friend’s “money habits”

    Image credits: Yan Krukau / Pexels (not the actual photo)

    Make sure you can meet the financial obligations of being a bridesmaid before accepting the honor, an expert’s advice

    Being a bridesmaid is considered an honor by many. But it’s also quite a big responsibility, and not one to be taken lightly. It’ll likely chow up your time, money and sanity. Apart from the obvious things like providing support to the bride, and going for fittings, you’ll also need to be prepared to foot the bill for certain things. And the costs could surprise you.

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    “The cost of being a bridesmaid depends heavily on the type of wedding,” says Fallon Carter, the founder and creative director of Fallon Carter Events, and a specialist in destination celebrations.

    When The Bridal Journey polled its audience, 40% of respondents admitted to spending over $1,000 to fulfil the role of bridesmaid. 25% said they spent between $600 and $1,000. “Only 12% reported spending less than $300,” reveals the site.

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    Ahead of the wedding, a bridesmaid is typically expected to attend (and often help plan) the bridal shower, and bring a gift. You may also need to chip in with the cost of this traditional affair, although in many cases, it’s covered by the bride’s family.

    Then there’s your biggest expense: the bachelorette party. Wedding planning site The Knot puts the average cost of these at $1,300, but this can vary depending on the location, activities planned, whether or not air travel is involved, and any accommodations that might be needed.

    “For the wedding itself, the bridal party is usually expected to cover the costs of travel and accommodations, which can vary drastically by the location of the event,” reveals The Knot. “While the couple will cover the costs of the bridesmaid’s bouquets, it isn’t always guaranteed they will pay for their professional hair and makeup, too.”

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    According to Brides.com, for a local wedding, you should expect to spend anywhere from $1,500 to $2,500 on the dress, shoes, alterations, hair and makeup, nails, travel, accommodations, gifts, and pre-wedding events.

    “A formal or black-tie affair typically runs higher—around $2,000 to $3,500—since designer gowns, luxury accessories, and professional glam are often part of the equation,” the site adds.

    Image credits: Edmond Dantès / Pexels (not the actual photo)

    When to say “I don’t” to being a bridesmaid…

    But just because you’re asked to be a bridesmaid doesn’t mean you have to accept the honor, especially if you’re unable to meet the financial obligations of being in the wedding party. In fact, more and more people are saying “I don’t” to the request.

    “While it is important for brides to be cognizant of their bridesmaids’ financial circumstances, they aren’t going to be mind readers,” says Amanda Connaughton, a Certified Financial Planner and Savvy Ladies Junior Board Member. “Many problems can be avoided by just having open, honest, communication early and often.” 

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    The expert advises that it’s best to have the discussion sooner rather than later.

    “If you truly cannot afford to be a bridesmaid without it being a detriment to your financial situation, think about if you are really doing the best thing. We have all heard the horror stories of bridesmaids backing out weeks before the wedding, often because of finances,” she explained. “While it might sting at first, you are putting the bride and her special day first by being honest about this at the beginning.”

     

    Image credits: AI25.Studio Studio / Pexels (not the actual photo)

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    “Disrespectful and rude”: Many people were divided, with some calling out the bride for not being a good friend

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    Commentary on high bridesmaid costs and impact on friendships with expensive activities

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    LakotaWolf (she/her)
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 hour ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I really never fully understood the whole "You're one of the best friends in my life, I love you, you are so special to me, I want you to be part of my special day.......... btw you have to pay hundreds/thousands of dollars for this honor" thing.

    LakotaWolf (she/her)
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 hour ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I really never fully understood the whole "You're one of the best friends in my life, I love you, you are so special to me, I want you to be part of my special day.......... btw you have to pay hundreds/thousands of dollars for this honor" thing.

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