Woman Gets Tired Of Neighbor’s Kids Showing Up At Her Pool Unannounced, So She Builds A Fence Which Then Infuriates The Kids’ Mom
It’s a story about a few kids who have crossed the line both figuratively and literally.
A now-deleted Reddit user posted a story about the time she met her new neighbors. At first, they seemed fine, so she even let their two teenage boys and 11-year-old girl come over and use her pool as long as the trio didn’t abuse their privilege.
But they did. In fact, the unannounced visits got so frequent and so gross that the woman decided to build a fence around her property.
However, after her neighbor’s protest and discussions with other people, she began having second thoughts. So the Reddit user told her story online, asking if she was the jerk in the conflict.
Continue scrolling to read what she wrote and the conversation I had about disciplining children with a former Editor-in-Chief turned parenting blogger, the woman behind Motherhood: The Real Deal and 40 Now What, Talya Stone.
Image credits: Travis Rigel Lukas Hornung (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Rob Adams (not the actual photo)
Bold, authentic, and straight-talking Talya told Bored Panda that appropriate discipline is necessary as children need and thrive on boundaries and will continuously push to find out where these lines are. “If we don’t put boundaries in place… well, they are going to have a tough time in life later on … Personally, I am in favor of using positive discipline which is focusing on teaching children which behaviors are appropriate/inappropriate and puts an onus on consequences. Needless to say, I am surprised the parents of the said teens didn’t intervene and let the children know that this was no appropriate behavior!”
The mom also highlighted that there’s a difference between discipline and punishment. Since the latter encourages children to lie and avoid punishment rather than avoiding the behavior you are trying to stop, Talya thinks it can be a good idea to look at how you are handling the situation and perhaps sit down with the teens to work out clear limits and rules, and clarify what behavior is expected of them as well as the consequences should they not live up to those expectations. “The children need to be involved in this process so they absolutely understand what the rules are, and what will happen if they don’t stick to them,” she explained.
An important thing to remember in these situations is that discipline should be about educating children on the appropriate way to carry themselves. “These are important life skills that will help them deal with the outside world in future, so they can gel nicely with the big wide world when they get out there as young adults,” Talya added. “Kids making mistakes and taking risks is absolutely normal behavior. As parents, it’s our duty to always teach them what is right and wrong but that should always be done in a warm and loving family environment.”
As the story went viral, OP provided more information
A 2018 Pew Research Center survey discovered that a majority of Americans (57%) say they know only some of their neighbors; far fewer (26%) say they know most of them. Americans ages 65 and older are more likely than those ages 18 to 29 to say they know most of their neighbors (34% vs. 20%). In contrast, about a quarter (23%) of adults under 30 don’t know any of their neighbors, compared with just 4% among those 65 and older.
There are also slight differences based on marital status. Roughly three-in-ten married adults (31%) say they know most of their neighbors, compared with about a quarter or fewer of those who are unmarried (22%); living with a partner (20%); divorced, separated, or widowed (26%); or have never been married (19%).
According to the survey, having children isn’t related to stronger ties with neighbors: parents are just as likely as non-parents to say they know most of their neighbors (26% for each group).
After the word gets out on the street about this story, Mark and Kaylie’s family should become quite popular in the neighborhood. Although I doubt it will bring them any good. At least temporarily. Until their kids go off to college.
Here’s what people thought about the whole ordeal
The first time one of the kids got injured in your pool, those neighbors would be on the phone to a lawyer… tell them no from day one.
In many states you HAVE to have a pool fence cause pools are considered "attractive nuances" and kids die in them
Yep. That was my first thought. It would be totally illegal in my state to have no fence around that pool.
Load More Replies...I’m introverted too and honestly you lasted a lot longer than I would have. I absolutely hate swimming with others in the pool and 2 rowdy teenagers would have definitely moved me to build the fence way sooner. NTA!! Enjoy your pool I envy you lol
I would have built the fence before I even moved in. It would have been the first thing on the list.
Load More Replies...Chad and Brad could do some good old digging with all their energy.
Load More Replies...Your first mistake was talking about it over a plate of cookies. Anyone offering to talk over a plate of cookies has ulterior motives. Always. Next time make it a triple scotch and get right down to the brass tacks. No f****n around.
I bought a house on a double lot. First moved in, see neighbors cutting thru to walk the dog to the street behind. Then they start walking along the sidewalk along my office room and kitchen. I call out, they ignore me. One time, the adult daughter was with them, I called out, she turned, the dad kept walking, the mom grabbed her arm to turn her back. I put up no trespassing signs. They went back to the grass. I put up a little 12” high fence from tree to tree, 100 yards. Neighbor is walking the dog, NOW she stops to talk to me. “Oh! Are you planting flowers there?” Yup, tulips. The other neighbor caught me at the curb on garbage day. She didn’t know I was new neighbor (cuz she never made eye contact) and started talking about how they used to go thru the yard, guess the last resident didnt like that. Wen she gets a new dog, she’ll have to go around the block. Yup.
Same. The church used to own our house and it was empty for 6 years. Cue literally over a dozen dog walkers - ‘but I have walked him here since he was a puppy’, ‘but it’s safer for him to be off leash here’ etc. I have two dogs. Fences and gates and CCTV were the first things up.
Load More Replies...In most communities, it's illegal to have a pool without having a barrier around it. Allowing the neighbor's kids to swim whenever they want, even if you're not home, opens you up to a crapload of liability should anyone get hurt. Obviously, the neighbor isn't watching her own kids. The fence should have gone up on Day One. If they want a pool, let them install one.
The first time one of the kids got injured in your pool, those neighbors would be on the phone to a lawyer… tell them no from day one.
In many states you HAVE to have a pool fence cause pools are considered "attractive nuances" and kids die in them
Yep. That was my first thought. It would be totally illegal in my state to have no fence around that pool.
Load More Replies...I’m introverted too and honestly you lasted a lot longer than I would have. I absolutely hate swimming with others in the pool and 2 rowdy teenagers would have definitely moved me to build the fence way sooner. NTA!! Enjoy your pool I envy you lol
I would have built the fence before I even moved in. It would have been the first thing on the list.
Load More Replies...Chad and Brad could do some good old digging with all their energy.
Load More Replies...Your first mistake was talking about it over a plate of cookies. Anyone offering to talk over a plate of cookies has ulterior motives. Always. Next time make it a triple scotch and get right down to the brass tacks. No f****n around.
I bought a house on a double lot. First moved in, see neighbors cutting thru to walk the dog to the street behind. Then they start walking along the sidewalk along my office room and kitchen. I call out, they ignore me. One time, the adult daughter was with them, I called out, she turned, the dad kept walking, the mom grabbed her arm to turn her back. I put up no trespassing signs. They went back to the grass. I put up a little 12” high fence from tree to tree, 100 yards. Neighbor is walking the dog, NOW she stops to talk to me. “Oh! Are you planting flowers there?” Yup, tulips. The other neighbor caught me at the curb on garbage day. She didn’t know I was new neighbor (cuz she never made eye contact) and started talking about how they used to go thru the yard, guess the last resident didnt like that. Wen she gets a new dog, she’ll have to go around the block. Yup.
Same. The church used to own our house and it was empty for 6 years. Cue literally over a dozen dog walkers - ‘but I have walked him here since he was a puppy’, ‘but it’s safer for him to be off leash here’ etc. I have two dogs. Fences and gates and CCTV were the first things up.
Load More Replies...In most communities, it's illegal to have a pool without having a barrier around it. Allowing the neighbor's kids to swim whenever they want, even if you're not home, opens you up to a crapload of liability should anyone get hurt. Obviously, the neighbor isn't watching her own kids. The fence should have gone up on Day One. If they want a pool, let them install one.






























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