Adult Child Feels Completely Used After Discovering Parents Hid One Major Thing

Whether it’s a valid feeling or not, realizing you’re not being treated fairly hurts. Especially when the people responsible for the injustice are the ones you expect to be your closest allies.

So when Reddit user Low_Scholar_2297, who diligently pays rent to their parents, learned that their sister is living there for free, it was as if they were being told she matters more.

And if that wasn’t enough, they were then asked to bump up the payments, and called selfish after agreeing only on the condition that their sibling matches their contribution.

This person’s landlords are their parents, and they wanted to increase their rent

Image credits: freepik (not the actual photo)

But their other “tenant” was getting a much better deal

Image credits: syda_productions (not the actual photo)

Image credits: Low_Scholar_2297

Younger daughters are, in fact, the most commonly favored children by their parents

It’s not easy to research parental favoritism — the culprits aren’t readily admitting to it. But in 2001, J. Jill Suitor, a professor of sociology at Purdue University, recruited more than 500 mothers, each of whom had two or more adult children, and began tracking their responses to questions such as “Which child do you spend more resources on?” “Whom do you feel emotionally closer to?”, and “Whom are you more disappointed in?”

(She has now studied the same families for so long that she has started collecting data on the effects of grandparental favoritism.)

The first surprising result from this data was just how pervasive the favoritism was. According to the study, roughly two-thirds of parents had a preferred child, and that favorite sibling often stayed the same over decades.

There was no set of qualities that guaranteed being the golden child, but, as in our Redditor’s family, favorites tended to be daughters and younger siblings.

A large analysis published in 2025 similarly found that in childhood, daughters were more likely to get preferential treatment from their parents.

And Dr. Suitor found that, in adulthood, the most important factor, “hands down,” was whether parents and children shared similar values, including on religious and political topics.

However, in some ways, parents’ own perception of their favoritism is irrelevant, Dr. Suitor said. In research examining the mental health consequences of favoritism, it’s far more important whether the children perceived unequal treatment.

And one study discovered that parents and children disagreed more than half the time when asked about the amount of differential treatment, who benefited from that inequity, and whether the differences were perceived as fair.

Part of the problem — just like this time as well — is that parents rarely discuss these topics with their children.

Image credits: Getty Images (not the actual photo)

Most of the people who read the story said the author did nothing wrong

Others thought the entire family needed to step up

And some said it was a lose-lose scenario for everyone

However, a few do think OP is the problem

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