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“How Did You Realize It Was Time To Break Up?”: 67 People Spill The Tea About Their Breakups
Breaking up with someone is never easy. It’s often awkward, embarrassing, and you can’t help but feel guilty, even if it’s for the best. Most people don’t want to hurt others. And yet, if you see that things are genuinely not working out, in the long run it is healthy if you go your separate ways.
We’re featuring people spilling the tea about the moments that made them realize that they should dump their ‘soulmates.’ Their stories are raw, real, and both hilarious and uncomfortable. Keep scrolling for your daily dose of relationship drama.
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#1
I realized I was dreading the Valentines picnic I had planned for us bc he wouldn't appreciate it, so I dumped him and went with my friends, who did appreciate it.
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#2
we weren't dating, still in the talking phase but he invited me to be his wedding date. I went and he didn't talk to me the whole 3 hours we were there. after the wedding, we went to olive garden. he told me that he didn't like vegetables and I told him I love them. when the waitress came to take our order, he ordered the soup for both of us. I guess I made a face cause the waitress looked at me and asked what I would like. I told her a salad. they bring it out and I'm tearing it up since I hadn't eaten all day. halfway through my salad, he says I should stop eating cause then I'm not going to eat my entree. I ate both. got back home and ghosted him. no man is gonna tell me what I can and can't eat.
#3
I teach middle schoolers and was teaching them about healthy relationships and realized I was teaching them to have standards I didn't even have.
Sven Horlemann 1 week ago
Yep, that hurts. Self-realization. Then again, it is most effective.
One of the most important things that help relationships last and avoid breakups is you and your partner respecting and admiring each other. Mutual esteem is very important to great relationships.
“The partners in these relationships dealt effectively with conflict and gave their partners the benefit of the doubt. In unsatisfactory relationships, the opposite is true,” Verywell Mind notes.
On the other hand, most relationships fail because both partners are not on the same page in terms of their wants, needs, values, goals, lifestyles, boundaries, and expectations.
#4
when the (playful and super affectionate) dog would immediately cower when he approached.
#6
When I FINALLY accepted the fact that no matter how many times I chose him, which he appreciated and at times needed, he would never choose me (my feelings, my needs, my desires, etc.)
Doctor Strange 1 week ago
Story of my life. I've been used. I've been settled or. But I've never been chosen.
Poor communication, a lack of trust, little to no empathy, a lack of understanding, and no active listening lead to improper conflict resolution. That, in turn, damages your relationship.
Little to no intimacy also harms your relationship, as do lying, infidelity, jealousy, and possessiveness.
Paradoxically, never arguing is not a good thing for couples. “It often reflects the fact that both people are conflict-avoidant. They’d rather not rock the boat or bring up difficult issues.
It’s actually better for couples to express their frustrations and find a way to talk through them rather than not argue at all."
#7
I made this dude a whole dinner, entrée and sides and everything. Served it to him, he said no thanks without even looking at it and then he ordered pizza... I told him get out of my house and I never spoke to him again
#8
we were on a rollercoaster line and I was holding onto my ice cream wrapper because I couldn't find a trash can nearby. he told me to just throw it down there (we were on the second floor). I said no becuse it'll go to the turtles. A few mins. later he smacks it out of my hand so it fell. In that moment, I stared at him in disgust and I knew we were done.
#9
He told me my focus on womens rights was really selfish
We want to hear from you! Share your insights and stories in the comments.
For you personally, what are the biggest relationship red flags that instantly tell you that someone is not worth your time?
What are the most important reasons why you broke up with someone? On the other hand, what are some silly, even funny moments that made you realize your relationship won’t work out?
What made you realize that your current partner is ‘the one’? Tell us all about it.
#11
Her faking ovarian cancer to cover up the fact she was pregnant with her exes kid and made excuses when she started showing. Found out through a Facebook announcement
#12
It snowed and it doesn't usually snow where we lived. I asked if he wanted to go on a walk in the snow together. He walked ten feet ahead of me the whole time and kept telling me to hurry up.. The magic was gone.
#13
He would throw up in the most bizarre places the bathtub, my underwear drawer… then refuse to clean it because it grossed him out.. I moved states
#14
He was rude to an old lady serving us sushi. So disrespectful.
#15
He cheated on me not even THREE weeks ago and verbatim said... "I'm never gonna hear the end of this am like sir what??
#16
we were scream arguing again before i was leaving for a trip. and just stopped midway and said "why i am doing this i dont even enjoy your presence"
Beak Hookage 1 week ago (edited)
I wish my neighbour would figure this out; I've heard enough scream-fighting for a lifetime. 🙄
#17
He said "I'm not going to change who I am for you" when I was asking for basic respect
Nicole Weymann 1 week ago
"Fair enough. I'm not gonna change who I am, either. I'm a person who needs a modicum of respect. Guess we'll both have to keep looking. Bye."
#18
He needed to be reminded to brush his teeth. And when he was handed great opportunities for a career and said no because he would have to wake up early..
#19
He fell for a pyramid scheme and said i "don't understand how business works" when i said it sounded like a pyramid scheme
#20
Dude I had just started talking to woke me up 2 days in with 73 text messages. 73!!! The first like 67 were actually texts, even a cute lil paragraph and the last were all gifs telling me to wake up. I’m a mom of 2, work morning shift. It was a day off and my kids were home from daycare, I actually got to sleep in… and he ruined my nice sleep 🥲
#21
After 10 years he told me he still sleeps on the same bed as his mom.
she had came into town, was staying at his place. a 1 bedroom. I lived with him. came home from work, realize she's in town asked where she will be sleeping. he said ""i thought you could sleep on the couch, I'll go sleep in bed with my mom"" I said ""that's weird "" he said ""you're weird if you think that's weird, I slept in the same bed as my mom untl i went to college. i Still sleep with her when I go home to visit"" I said ""your .. your parents have a 5 bedroom house, and you're 47😭"" then i left, got pulled over by the police told them this story and they told me to go somewhere safe😅"
A suspicious pepper 1 week ago
I can in fact agree that something is very weird in that household
#22
I brought him over to my place and he grabbed a fork out of my drawer scratched his back then put it back.
#23
I said "l love you drive safe" when he was leaving my house after a fight and he yelled "no you don't" and I just thought hell you're right and closed the door
Earthquake903 1 week ago
I had one get furious with me for saying "Drive safe". He was greatly offended.
#24
I finally realized he doesn't really like me. 13 years of not remembering my birthday but expecting me to make his special.
#25
He fought with me the day before my birthday then abandoned me for my actual birthday because I wouldn't wait in line to meet Krampus. A PERSON DRESSED AS KRAMPUS
#26
I got to see my friends for the first time in months and thought wow this is the happiest I've been in a long time! Realized I hated hanging out with him
#27
I graduated from parsons and he texted me congrats on coloring school
#28
he jokingly flicked my ear (that is how he disciplines his dog)
Crystalwitch60 1 week ago
🤬🤬🤬hope the dog bites him !, I’d be going to rescue said dog as well .
#29
He wouldn’t stop free styling for random people when we went out to bars, and I’d just have to stand there experiencing secondhand embarrassment every time
#30
He kissed me and left a tonsil stone on my lip. I didn’t know they were a thing back then so I was extremely confused and grossed out. It was also my first kiss sigh
#31
I started wishing he would cheat on me so I had a excuse to leave
#32
we would be on the phone and i would just be constantly rolling my eyes and faking sleeping early so i could have alone time
Cerulean 1 week ago
I once watched a friend fighting on the phone w her bf. He was talking and talking. She just laid the phone quietly down, wandered off to get a cigarette, lit it, came back, picked up the phone again, said "U-huh," and he didn't even notice! Never been quite sure if I was scandalized or impressed. For context, they were both lawyers in their 30s.
#33
He said he didn't like sauces, ketchup/bbq/honey mustard nothing, and he also didn't like anything seasoned 😐 I'm Dominican I live and breathe sauces and seasonings
#34
He was too nice. By “too nice” I mean… if I stated an opinion he had the exact same one for every single thing. No original opinions. It was like he was mirroring me and I just felt like I was talking into a mirror
Maya_D 1 week ago
I’ve literally had guys on dating sites say to me “I don’t have any hobbies so I’ll just do yours with you”. Like no, I want someone with interests of their own! And definitely not someone who is going to tag along with me on everything because they don’t have an actual personality.
#35
He said his ex was too good for him. That made me good enough?
#37
I divorced my husband because he took out the trash on trash day but didn’t grab any trash from the house or anything and took out an empty bin. A lot of things led up to that of course but that was my breaking point.
Earthquake903 1 week ago
Yeah, it was a bag of trash that finally made it click with me that I needed to divorce my husband. I was the only one working, with 3 young kids, doing all the chores and when I asked him for help, he yelled "I took the trash out for you!" Then promptly went back to watching TV or whatever he was doing.
#38
I got him a ps5 for Christmas and I got nothing
Binky Melnik 1 week ago (edited)
I hope she got a PS5; she shoulda yanked that back SOOO fast as soon as she realized he’d not gotten her anything!
#39
And he was so financially irresponsible, like he was truly broke and couldn't take me out nowhere but he WOUId spend $700 on car parts weekly?? ??
#40
my therapist literally begged me to and said she'd bring me chocolate strawberries if i did.
#41
He had a comeback for EVERYTHING I SAID like talking to Sheldon cooper
#42
he wore flip flops everywhere including restaurants
#43
I had a boyfriend that wouldn’t use a towel after showering. He would just put clothes on immediately and they be damp…. gave me the ick so quick
Kathrin Pukowsky 1 week ago (edited)
You can do this in a heat wave, when you already don't feel like wearing much clothing. Arms, legs, and torso are fine, the moisture evaporates quickly because of the heat and it feels a bit cooling. But the groin and buttcrack become a swamp. So towel those dry.
#44
When I texted his ex to see if he cheated on me with her and we both trauma bonded over the fact that he's probably just attracted to men
#45
he decided to skip a math exam and get a zero because he didn't have a calculator
Binky Melnik 1 week ago
Who doesn’t have a calculator? 😳 Every phone has one, and there’s no excuse not to have a phone as these days, they’re given away free.
#46
my coworker told me it's not normal to be anxious every day over his moods and crying over him every few days. dumped him over sc (he only texted on there?) and moved out that night.
#48
He told me two years into our relationship he wasn't sure he even wanted to marry me
#49
I was pregnant and had an awful time with the smell of cigarettes - would feel sick for hours. He went drinking with a friend, came back reeking of cigarettes. To him I was overreacting and couldn’t let him have a good time, but he was fully aware I wanted us BOTH to be sober while I was pregnant. To him, he wasn’t the one pregnant so shouldn’t be restricted. God took over, I sadly lost the baby and we separated not too long after. As devastated as I was over the loss, I think it was better not to be tied to someone like that with a child.
highwaycrossingfrog 1 week ago (edited)
The cigarettes thing is highly inconsiderate, but I have a problem with someone trying to control what another person is or is not allowed to do. It's is reasonable to say "Would you be willing to go sober with me during the pregnancy?" It is not reasonable to say "We both have to be sober during the pregnancy." "To him, he wasn't the one pregnant so shouldn't be restricted" = he wanted the right to retain choice over what he put in his body.
#50
Because he said “Rawr” in all our text messages.( I know, cool for us millennials. But I found it cringe). The night before I left for my senior trip . He bit my shoulder, licked it and said “I Rawr you!”. I just got up and left.
#53
his mom would kiss him on the neck???
#54
Let me walk out alone in the dark to my car.
#55
He was broke asf and then called out of work
#56
Not a breakup but on a second date once the guy wouldn’t make a sand castle with me while we were on the beach so I said nah not for me
Lady Gypsy Rain 1 week ago
I mean, fair enough if that is your priority in life. But a great number of people, myself included, would not enjoy this. And some of us don’t even really know how to do this. I’m not an architect or a builder or a contractor so my skills in that area are quite lacking. Besides, that involves sitting in the sand and we all know what area of the body gets rubbed raw from the sand. Yuck, no thank you. But, I also wouldn’t be upset if that was something my date wanted to do as long as they are ok with me sitting on a beach sheet and watching.
#57
He kept sending me CapCut edits of himself
#58
i felt like i was more masculine than feminine while dating him
#60
When we were arguing & I started throwing things at him. He had successfully taken me out of my character. I wasn't me anymore in that moment & that broke me
#61
we were out in public and someone shouted "she's out of your league dude" and we both sat in silence
Paul C 1 week ago
I had a stunningly beautiful gf in uni. People were always saying things like that, especially guys in bars when they thought they could chat her up (whilst I was sitting there). Even some of my friends tried it on, if they thought they were better looking than me. It was annoying to both of us, but not something to break up over. I don't get this one.
#62
Went to her apt. She had Single Ply Toilet Paper. I began my exit strategy at that moment. If you don’t love yourself…how can you truly love someone else?
#63
he would use his middle finger to press buttons
#64
he snapped his fingers super loud when he couldn’t remember something and it made me so mad
#65
Okay I might get cancelled for this but I broke up with a guy because he went to the hospital for popcorn lungs from vaping. When he got out of the hospital he wanted to surprise me.. he came to my house and had an oxygen tank on.. it was so pathetic to me
Pittsburgh rare 1 week ago
One of you two is stupid and the other one is cruel. Not gonna clarify who's what.
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Chich the witch 1 week ago
Dated a woman who described herself as high maintenance and found out right quick she was not joking. Sorry, but you have to bring something to the relationship apart from good looks.
Barbara Deskins 1 week ago
guy got mad at me for not wanting S#X for the third time that day. So, I asked if he expected s#x on demand. Of course he said no, but I was done
Chich the witch 1 week ago
Dated a woman who described herself as high maintenance and found out right quick she was not joking. Sorry, but you have to bring something to the relationship apart from good looks.
Barbara Deskins 1 week ago
guy got mad at me for not wanting S#X for the third time that day. So, I asked if he expected s#x on demand. Of course he said no, but I was done
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