Woman Learns A Secret Parents Have Been Hiding For 28 Yrs, They Beg Her Not To Tell Her Siblings
We all are, unfortunately or sometimes fortunately, subjected to suffering the consequences of our parent’s choices. Where you live, what you eat and what you look like is generally decided by the life your parents put together. But for some, this genetic legacy goes beyond eye color and facial features.
A woman wondered if she was wrong to call her parents selfish for having her when they knew there was a high chance she would inherit an incurable disease. We reached out to the woman in the story via private message and will update the article when she gets back to us.
Hereditary diseases are generally pretty predictable
Image credits: Pavel Danilyuk / pexels (not the actual photo)
But one woman learned her parents had been hiding a serious condition from her for years
Image credits: Sarah Chai / pexels (not the actual photo)
Image credits: RDNE Stock project / pexels (not the actual photo)
Later she clarified some things in an update
Image credits: Quirky_Background838
Huntingtons is a true nightmare disease
For those who are not familiar with Huntington’s, consider yourself blessed. It’s a neurodegenerative disease that is incurable and is in almost all cases inherited. It can be hard to detect if one’s family hasn’t been diagnosed with it, as symptoms start to manifest after the age of thirty, although they can show up as late as fifty.
Generally, Huntington’s manifests as a gradually worsening ability to control one’s movements. Over time, the person ends up having difficulty swallowing and speaking, while, simultaneously, cognitive abilities also decline, often going as far as the person having dementia. It’s a horrible disease, made worse by the fact that there is no cure, just the assurance that it will get worse.
If your family is predisposed towards Huntington’s and you don’t have it, it means you won a literal coin toss, as the risk is almost perfectly 50%. These are pretty terrible odds, particularly if you are dooming a child to go through life without knowing if the condition is going to strike in their thirties or forties.
Image credits: Pavel Danilyuk / pexels (not the actual photo)
Living with the knowledge of a terminal illness is very hard
This is perhaps why the woman’s parents didn’t want to tell her, as Huntington’s can be very hard to diagnose until the symptoms start. In other words, you can go through almost three decades worrying about something without knowing. There is some argument for not telling someone, but, as this story demonstrates, a painful truth is probably better than living a lie. It can be very hard to talk about, but the consequences of avoiding this conversation are even worse.
After all, the woman in the story herself admits that she would not have a kid if she knew. As difficult as it seems, it’s generally for the best if people can make arrangements for their life early, not have this devastating news sprung on them. The other issue is the fact that the parents decided to have kids at all. Unfortunately, we won’t be able to hear their reasoning, but there are really not a lot of “good” reasons to have multiple kids when you risk perpetuating something like Huntington’s.
Image credits: cottonbro studio / pexels (not the actual photo)
Calling one’s parents selfish is a controversial action
While in some cases, it’s possible that people were not aware, as Huntington’s does share symptoms with other, highly debilitating neurodegenerative diseases, but in this story, it would appear that the woman’s parents knew what was happening. Even then, taking responsibility is a normal part of being a mature adult. They understood the risks and decided to have kids anyway. Not adopt, not give up their dreams of having children, they just went on with their lives.
Even worse, they didn’t have a plan to explain the risks. They just hoped for the best and were caught off guard after one of their children did a little bit of digging. This is perhaps very human, as most of us struggle to face hard truths, but it’s also ultimately selfish. The question of “is a parent to blame for the existential suffering of a child?” is one that humanity hasn’t really answered, but that isn’t to say that this woman can’t call her own parents selfish.
Image credits: Pavel Danilyuk / pexels (not the actual photo)
Most thought she was absolutely in the right
But a few sided with the parents
Others shared similar stories
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The YTA are beyond stupid or ignorant. How could the parents be so selfish to not even inform their children before they started conceiving themselves. Lying about relatives diseases. Justifying all this c**p by belittling their daughter. I couldn't forgive them. Huntington disease is DOMINANT. Just one copy and you're doomed.
These people are completely f*****g ignorant. It's a terrible degenerative disease with a 50/50 inheritance rate. Lifespan cut in half. And the last 10 years of your life are a slow and personal horror as you lose control of both your body and your mind. These parents ARE terrible people, especially since it can be addressed via egg/sperm donation.
Load More Replies...I have always thought that people who force a child to be born knowing that they will likely have a condition or deformity that will greatly affect their life and do so anyways are just being selfish and fulfilling their own desire to be a parent instead of thinking about the future of that actual person they are bringing into the world.
This is why we need to fight for our reproductive rights. They even want to ban contraception here in America now! It should be our right to make these choices, because it not only affects us, it affects our children if we're for rd to have them.
Load More Replies...Not only did those parents have just one child, they had THREE. Good thing OP told her sibs, esp. since bro + his fiancee are trying for a baby. LC or NC is the right choice to deal with those selfish parents.
And they sat back and watched 2 of their children have children/try to have children knowing that this horrible disease can be tested for beforehand and they could have healthy children through IVF. Now not only are their children going to possibly have this disease but they may have to watch their children (grandchildren) suffer.
Load More Replies...YTA as unhinged as ever. Yes, we will all be dead in the end but I personally would prefer to die in my sleep without years of terrible illness before that, thank you very much. Huntington is not like a strawberry allergy or something and her parents knew before they had their 3 kids
People who have Huntington's in their genes should not have children. It's nothing but selfish. This is a horrible, fatal disease and to willingly inflict it on someone else because you want to parent, make you a scumbag, unworthy of children. This is a 50/50 chance for the kids. It's disgusting. If I was the gal, I'd absolutely MAKE SURE i told all the younger children. They should not that their parents are NOT trustworthy people and they need to look out for themselves.
If you use IVF you can screen your embryos for the gene before implantation. So this whole situation is worse because the OP and her siblings could have ensured that they had children without the disease and their parents stole that chance from them.
Load More Replies...Their son and his wife are trying to get pregnant. This would be the absolute last moment.
Load More Replies...And people get pissy when I describe some "parents" as breeders. Those two are the textbook example. They KNEW it was a death sentence, they KNEW it was hereditary, they CHOSE to breed and have three kids, and CHOSE not to tell AFTER a least one kid was born. Huntington's is one of those diseases that makes people go to the Centre of Expertise on Euthanasia in the Netherlands. Maybe the "parents" should visit.
NTA. I have Sickle Cell Trait (which is different from Sickle Cell Disease). When I was about to get married, one of the things that I made sure we did, was to have my wife-to-be tested to learn her Sickle Cell status. She had neither the disease nor the trait. That was important, because if she had the trait as well, we likely would have chosen not to have children. Sickle Cell trait is a recessive gene. When two people with the trait have a child, there is a 25% chance that the child will develop Sickle Cell Disease and a 50% chance that the child will have Sickle Cell Trait. I've watched people struggle with Sickle Cell Disease and I've watched as friends buried their 21 year-old daughter who died from the disease. As it is, we have two children. We had them tested at birth. One has the trait, one does not. You and your siblings deserve to know. That isn't your parents' secret to keep.
There is a reason why in the Jewish Community many people do genetic testing before marriage, bc of genetic diseases to make sure the couple are not both carriers
This is an interesting combination of religion and science
Load More Replies...The YTA are beyond stupid or ignorant. How could the parents be so selfish to not even inform their children before they started conceiving themselves. Lying about relatives diseases. Justifying all this c**p by belittling their daughter. I couldn't forgive them. Huntington disease is DOMINANT. Just one copy and you're doomed.
These people are completely f*****g ignorant. It's a terrible degenerative disease with a 50/50 inheritance rate. Lifespan cut in half. And the last 10 years of your life are a slow and personal horror as you lose control of both your body and your mind. These parents ARE terrible people, especially since it can be addressed via egg/sperm donation.
Load More Replies...I have always thought that people who force a child to be born knowing that they will likely have a condition or deformity that will greatly affect their life and do so anyways are just being selfish and fulfilling their own desire to be a parent instead of thinking about the future of that actual person they are bringing into the world.
This is why we need to fight for our reproductive rights. They even want to ban contraception here in America now! It should be our right to make these choices, because it not only affects us, it affects our children if we're for rd to have them.
Load More Replies...Not only did those parents have just one child, they had THREE. Good thing OP told her sibs, esp. since bro + his fiancee are trying for a baby. LC or NC is the right choice to deal with those selfish parents.
And they sat back and watched 2 of their children have children/try to have children knowing that this horrible disease can be tested for beforehand and they could have healthy children through IVF. Now not only are their children going to possibly have this disease but they may have to watch their children (grandchildren) suffer.
Load More Replies...YTA as unhinged as ever. Yes, we will all be dead in the end but I personally would prefer to die in my sleep without years of terrible illness before that, thank you very much. Huntington is not like a strawberry allergy or something and her parents knew before they had their 3 kids
People who have Huntington's in their genes should not have children. It's nothing but selfish. This is a horrible, fatal disease and to willingly inflict it on someone else because you want to parent, make you a scumbag, unworthy of children. This is a 50/50 chance for the kids. It's disgusting. If I was the gal, I'd absolutely MAKE SURE i told all the younger children. They should not that their parents are NOT trustworthy people and they need to look out for themselves.
If you use IVF you can screen your embryos for the gene before implantation. So this whole situation is worse because the OP and her siblings could have ensured that they had children without the disease and their parents stole that chance from them.
Load More Replies...Their son and his wife are trying to get pregnant. This would be the absolute last moment.
Load More Replies...And people get pissy when I describe some "parents" as breeders. Those two are the textbook example. They KNEW it was a death sentence, they KNEW it was hereditary, they CHOSE to breed and have three kids, and CHOSE not to tell AFTER a least one kid was born. Huntington's is one of those diseases that makes people go to the Centre of Expertise on Euthanasia in the Netherlands. Maybe the "parents" should visit.
NTA. I have Sickle Cell Trait (which is different from Sickle Cell Disease). When I was about to get married, one of the things that I made sure we did, was to have my wife-to-be tested to learn her Sickle Cell status. She had neither the disease nor the trait. That was important, because if she had the trait as well, we likely would have chosen not to have children. Sickle Cell trait is a recessive gene. When two people with the trait have a child, there is a 25% chance that the child will develop Sickle Cell Disease and a 50% chance that the child will have Sickle Cell Trait. I've watched people struggle with Sickle Cell Disease and I've watched as friends buried their 21 year-old daughter who died from the disease. As it is, we have two children. We had them tested at birth. One has the trait, one does not. You and your siblings deserve to know. That isn't your parents' secret to keep.
There is a reason why in the Jewish Community many people do genetic testing before marriage, bc of genetic diseases to make sure the couple are not both carriers
This is an interesting combination of religion and science
Load More Replies...



































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