Doctor Refuses Pain Meds For Patient, Ignores Nurse — Patient’s Wife Steps In And Gets It Done Fast

It’s not unusual to be left hanging by healthcare providers. Whether it’s waiting forever in the lobby to see a GP or waiting just as long to be seen in an emergency room, it seems more than a few netizens have a story of doctors getting it wrong.

One nurse who was dealing with an elderly patient in considerable pain couldn’t believe it when the assigned doctor put off ordering meds. Unable to reprimand him personally, she did the next best thing: pointed the patient’s furious wife in his direction.

More info: Reddit

Healthcare providers can be less than helpful, as this nurse was frustrated to find out during one of her night shifts

Elderly patient sitting, comforted by a nurse, looking contemplative in a clinical setting.

Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)

She was seeing to an elderly patient who arrived in serious pain, accompanied by his wife

Nurse intervenes with furious wife when patient gets ignored by doctor.

Patient ignored by doctor despite severe pain; nurse and wife intervene.

Doctor delays treatment review of patient's chart, causing confusion in emergency room setting.

Doctor in discussion with a patient, gesturing with hands, wearing a white coat and stethoscope.

Image credits: The Yuri Arcurs Collection / Freepik (not the actual photo)

The patient was really suffering, so she called the doctor, but he said he wouldn’t order any pain meds until he’d reviewed the patient’s chart

Text highlighting a doctor dismissing concerns over the phone.

Text reading, "I apologized to the patient and the wife, relaying the doctor's message," regarding suffering patient.

Text describing a patient suffering severe pain while being ignored by a doctor at a nursing station.

Text of an apology as a nurse addresses an angry wife about a suffering patient's ignored pain.

Elderly patient ignored by inattentive doctor, with concerned nurse and upset wife in the background.

Image credits: DC Studio / Freepik (not the actual photo)

After collecting a bunch of charts, the doctor headed off to the nurse station and point-blank ignored her, leaving her to apologize once more to the patient and his wife

Patient's wife seeks doctor at nursing station after nurse's guidance.

Furious wife confronts doctor over suffering patient until nurse intervenes.

Patient's family intervention highlights medical frustration.

Image credits: PastFace1132

When the wife asked her where the doctor was, she led her right to him, then stood back while the wife tore a strip off him until the meds were ordered

Working night shifts as a nurse can be exhausting, but dealing with stubborn doctors might be even worse. OP shared how a patient arrived in her unit in severe pain with no meds ordered. She quickly called the doctor, expecting some support. Instead? He coldly refused to prescribe anything until he’d “reviewed the chart.”

That made no sense to OP – he had already seen the patient in the ER. Still, he was adamant, dismissing her concerns and promising to come up “soon.” When he arrived, OP pleaded again, hoping he’d finally do something, but the dopey doctor shrugged it off, parked himself at the nursing station, and ignored OP completely.

Meanwhile, the patient was still in agony. OP returned to the room, trying to reassure the couple. The patient’s wife was visibly upset, and understandably so, so when she asked where the doctor was, OP didn’t hesitate—she escorted her straight to the source. Time for some much-needed butt kicking.

And oh, did the patient’s irate wife deliver. She ripped into the doctor in front of everyone, calling him out for ignoring her husband’s pain and refusing to act. That’s when the miracle happened: the doctor suddenly found his missing empathy, apologized profusely, and quickly wrote orders for some immediate pain relief. 

From what OP tells us in her post, it would seem that her patient was, at least until his wife stepped in, a victim of medical gaslighting. But just what is medical gaslighting, and how do you avoid it? We went looking for the facts.

Nurse standing confidently in a hospital room, ready to assist patients with professional care.

Image credits: Wavebreak Media / Freepik (not the actual photo)

In her article for CNBC, Renée Onque writes that, while the term “medical gaslighting” may be relatively new, the practice has been affecting people’s health outcomes for decades, especially women and people of color. 

“Medical gaslighting is when concerns about your healthcare are being dismissed, they’re not heard and they are minimized,” says Stacey E. Rosen, senior vice president for Northwell Health’s Katz Institute for Women’s Health.

“One thing to remember when we go to the doctor is that the provider has specialized knowledge of healthcare and health topics in general, but you know your body,” says Tina Sacks, an associate professor in the school of social welfare at UC Berkeley.

In her article for VeryWellMind, Cynthia Vinney (Ph.D.) writes that, until the healthcare system changes, medical gaslighting will likely remain a problem, but there are things you can do to ensure you get the care you need.

According to Vinney, some of these include finding a doctor you trust, bringing a trusted friend or family member along, writing your symptoms and questions down beforehand, taking notes during your appointment, and getting a second opinion. 

We shudder to think how much more pain OP’s patient would have had to endure if it weren’t for his justifiably annoyed wife. As OP says, her hands were tied when it came to getting any satisfaction out of the lazy doctor, so it’s a good thing the wife spoke up.

Do you think the doctor learned his lesson? Have you ever been left hanging by a healthcare provider? Let us know in the comments!

In the comments, plenty of readers applauded the nurse for her actions, while others shared their own healthcare horror stories

Discussion about doctor ignoring patient while nurse intervenes; focus on medical response issues.

Nurse defends suffering patient as doctor is oblivious until furious wife intervenes.

Comment says 'DO NOT p**s off a nurse. EVER' related to suffering patient and lackadaisical doctor.

Nurse advocates fiercely for suffering patient against lackadaisical doctor, sharing experiences and retirement plans.

Reddit comment criticizing a neglectful doctor, praising the patient’s wife for intervening.

Reddit comment appreciating nurses for their dedication, especially during holidays.

A frustrated wife complains about her husband's ignored suffering, expressing anger at the lackadaisical doctor.

Text describing frustration with lackadaisical doctor, highlighting a patient being ignored until intervention led to care.

Text recounts suffering patient post-surgery, ignored by doctor until nurse alerts furious wife about medication error.

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