Get Premium
Dark mode theme is available exclusively for premium users. Learn more about the benefits of subscribing.
No fees, cancel anytime.
Dark Mode 
No fees, cancel anytime 
then open in external browser
and click "Open in External Browser" 
Restaurant Customer Leaves Zero Tip After Accidentally Overhearing What Waitress Said About Her
The late great Maya Angelou hit the nail on the head when shesaid, “Prejudice is a burden that confuses the past, threatens the future, and renders the present inaccessible.” Yet, in today’s supposedly progressive world, racism in various forms unfortunately persists.
This story, shared on the AITAH subreddit, is one of many examples. A restaurant patron happened to overhear a server’s bigoted comments about her. But instead of calling the person out or complaining to the manager, the author chose not to leave a tip.
One of her companions criticized her for what she had done. This made her rethink her actions and ask the internet if she was at fault.
RELATED:
Racism has no place in society
Image credits: Stanford Smith / unsplash (not the actual photo)
A restaurant patron dealt with an unpleasant server
Image credits: Jonathan Borba / pexels (not the actual photo)
As she came to find out, the waitstaff’s attitude was out of bigotry
Image credits: Yusuf Çelik / pexels (not the actual photo)
Instead of reporting to the manager, the author issued a more stinging response
Image credits: Clay Banks / unsplash (not the actual photo)
However, her actions didn’t sit well with one of her companions
Image credits: IndependentFar8420
Racism can be both a nature and nurture issue
The absurdity that racism still exists today can be baffling. It may make you ask, “Where is it all coming from?”
Yale University social psychologistJennifer Richeson offered a simple explanation. Inan interview with The Washington Post, she stated, “People learn to be whatever their society and culture teach them.”
Thenature vs. nurture debate has been longstanding in psychology. Experts question whether our characteristics are influenced by innate biological factors or the environment we grew up in.
No one is born racist. However, something in how our brains are wired apparently creates discriminatory thinking. Here’s another explanation from NYU psychology professorEric Knowles: “An us-them mentality is, unfortunately, a really basic part of our biology.”
A skillful response is necessary against racial microaggressions
Image credits: Pressmaster / envato (not the actual photo)
What the author experienced is what experts refer to as racial microaggressions. It’s having the same prejudiced mindset that isn’t as outright as it was once.
If you find yourself the victim of racism in any form, experts like Dr. Alex Klein advise giving a well-thought-out comeback. In an article for Medical News Today, he defines a “skillful response” as an approach meant to educate and not attack.
However, Dr. Klein accepts the idea of a reply that best suits the situation. He says an assertive response may be called for, especially when done calmly.
In the author’s case, she didn’t retaliate or label anyone a racist, which could’ve caused a ruckus. Instead, she responded in a way that would profoundly affect the server. It was a strong, warranted message.
What do you think, dear readers? Was the author out of line? Did she deserve to be berated by her boyfriend’s mother?
The author gave more information about the incident
Most commenters sided with her
But some didn’t agree with how she handled the situation
Poll Question
Total votes ·
Thanks! Check out the results:
Total votes ·
Newsletter
Subscribe to Access
Exclusive Polls
By entering your email and clicking Subscribe, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. You are also agreeing to our Privacy Policy.
Thank you! You've successfully subscribed to newsletters!
What do you think ?
Melissa anderson 1 year ago
Low life racists don’t deserve to be tipped. I really hope this waitress gets all the pain she deserves
ॐBoyGanesh 1 year ago (edited)
I’m not a POC so I really don’t have a valid thing to say about this experience, but I am queer enough that my vocal inflection & mannerisms make it rather obvious to anyone but the utterly oblivious. I’ve definitely had s****y service that was bordering on hostile & adversarial for that reason alone. It’s odd for a profession with more than few of us, except when you get to more rural places. Also, my hubby is Latino & I’ve experienced the racism hostility directed towards him whilst eating out. I’m GenX so I tip 20% standard unless it’s remarkable. For bigots,/homophobes, I always write 20% amt on the check, scratch it out and rewrite 5-10% depending on how deplorable they’ve been. I note why on the check. Always. If it’s a newer machine, I’ll verbalize with a mutter the same. “Twenty percent would be…but wait, they were being a rude hostile clearly anti-gay…five percent is…” as I’m fidgeting around with the machine. Knowing they can hear me. Knowing there’s little they can say.
Melissa anderson 1 year ago
Low life racists don’t deserve to be tipped. I really hope this waitress gets all the pain she deserves
ॐBoyGanesh 1 year ago (edited)
I’m not a POC so I really don’t have a valid thing to say about this experience, but I am queer enough that my vocal inflection & mannerisms make it rather obvious to anyone but the utterly oblivious. I’ve definitely had s****y service that was bordering on hostile & adversarial for that reason alone. It’s odd for a profession with more than few of us, except when you get to more rural places. Also, my hubby is Latino & I’ve experienced the racism hostility directed towards him whilst eating out. I’m GenX so I tip 20% standard unless it’s remarkable. For bigots,/homophobes, I always write 20% amt on the check, scratch it out and rewrite 5-10% depending on how deplorable they’ve been. I note why on the check. Always. If it’s a newer machine, I’ll verbalize with a mutter the same. “Twenty percent would be…but wait, they were being a rude hostile clearly anti-gay…five percent is…” as I’m fidgeting around with the machine. Knowing they can hear me. Knowing there’s little they can say.
Related on Bored Panda
41
45