35YO Has Had Enough Of GF Draining Her Financially And Emotionally, Folks Advise Her To Run

Just a few years back, speaking about mental health was taboo, so it gives me great pleasure that people are opening up about it more now. It also brings me great dissatisfaction that some people use it as an excuse to treat others poorly.

This couple is also struggling with something similar. The original poster (OP) is conflicted because her girlfriend’s mental health “struggles” are getting too much to bear. OP also feels like a doormat who is being drained emotionally and financially. Let’s find out what’s really bothering her!

More info: Mumsnet

A relationship can instantly turn sour when one partner pours in everything while the other is just indifferent

Two women in a park expressing love and connection, highlighting a relationship where one partner struggles emotionally.

Image credits: Camila Blando / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

The poster suspects that her girlfriend has undiagnosed mental health conditions due to her behavior

Text conversation about a girlfriend tormenting her partner while she struggles in life, showing emotional conflict.

Lady puts her heart and soul in relationship while her girlfriend torments her as she struggles in life.

Text showing a woman struggling in life as her girlfriend torments her despite her putting heart and soul into the relationship.

Text excerpt describing a struggling lady in a relationship where her girlfriend torments her despite her efforts and heart.

Alt text: Text excerpt describing a lady struggling in life while her girlfriend continues to torment her despite her heart and soul in the relationship.

Image credits: Vaglodger

Two women sitting by surfboards, one smiling and the other wearing sunglasses, capturing relationship struggle emotions.

Image credits: Coqui Chang / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

The woman is always provided emotional and financial support from the poster, who sadly receives nothing in return

Text excerpt about a lady struggling in life as her girlfriend torments her despite her putting heart and soul in the relationship.

Text on a white background reading her bad day is everybody in her path gets some kind of attitude or criticism as she struggles in life.

Text excerpt showing a lady putting her heart and soul in a relationship while feeling tormented and struggling in life.

Text showing a lady expressing how her girlfriend torments her despite her putting heart and soul into the relationship while struggling.

Image credits: Vaglodger

Woman struggling in life lying on bed holding phone, reflecting relationship challenges and emotional torment.

Image credits: Ketut Subiyanto / Pexels (not the actual photo)

Right from fulfilling her basic needs to even paying for her and taking her on trips, the poster does absolutely everything for her

Alt text: Woman puts her heart and soul in relationship but faces torment while struggling with daily life tasks.

Text excerpt discussing relationship struggles where a lady puts her heart and soul but faces torment from her girlfriend.

Text on white background showing a confused person wondering how to get out of a struggling relationship with a tormenting GF.

Text discussing a lady who puts her heart and soul in her relationship while struggling in life and being tormented by her girlfriend.

Text on a white background expressing struggle in life and heartache as a lady puts her heart and soul in a relationship.

Text message expressing feelings of being disrespected, undervalued, and taken for a fool in a struggling relationship.

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However, she feels undervalued and disrespected as the girlfriend doesn’t even do the bare minimum, as it’s “too much” for her

Today, OP takes us on a sad ride as she tells us how she feels like a doormat due to her girlfriend of 10 months. She suspects that the woman has some undiagnosed mental health conditions, as she is often moody and huffy about things more than usual. When the poster’s kids are with her ex, she stays with her, and also doesn’t work as OP is “well off”.

The problem is that the poster is basically doing everything for her, providing for her financially, cooking for her, and even washing her clothes. On top of all this, she also tries to make her feel good whenever she is down, and is taking her out on a trip in August. Without a doubt, I can say that OP deserves the Best Girlfriend Award if there is one! 

However, the relationship is all one-sided. The girlfriend just won’t reciprocate anything, and OP can barely count 4 times where she has paid the bill for them. Moreover, the poster is “not allowed” to have bad days when she is also having one. How absurd, right? In fact, she won’t even support when the poster is going through her own struggles, claiming it doesn’t involve her.

Clearly, OP is tired of always being the one who has to save the day for her girlfriend, and now she’s brought up something new. Apparently, she dislikes the poster’s ex “infringing on their relationship”. Since they have to communicate for the sake of their kids, the poster is stumped by this. Probably confused, she vented online, and folks told her that the woman is a big red flag!

Young woman struggling in life, sitting alone on a couch holding a pillow, showing emotional stress in a relationship.

Image credits: Vlad Dribnokhod / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

To get a deeper insight into this couple’s conflict, Bored Panda reached out to Eden Lobo, a counselor and psychology professor. She mentioned that when your partner constantly dismisses your feelings or doesn’t show up emotionally, it slowly chips away at your self-worth. In fact, she said that you can start doubting yourself, walking on eggshells, and maybe even blaming yourself for the imbalance.

“Over time, it can leave you feeling anxious, drained, or emotionally numb—like you’re giving everything and getting nothing back. And the worst part? You might start thinking that’s normal. (It’s not!) But here’s the truth: your feelings matter. Wanting support isn’t “too much.” You deserve a relationship where you’re valued, heard, and cared for,” she added.

We asked our expert if a relationship can work when one partner is doing all the heavy lifting. Prof. Lobo replied that absolutely not, even if the other’s got mental health challenges. She explained that love isn’t a solo sport. As per her, if you’re always the therapist, cheerleader, and chef while they’re emotionally missing, that’s not a relationship, it’s a full-time job with no pay.

Prof. Lobo believes that mental health matters, but so does effort. She stressed that it’s okay to struggle, but it’s not okay to expect your partner to carry the whole thing while you nap on the emotional couch.

“However, having said all that, it’s important to note that the girlfriend in the story might be really sick and truly needs help. While their relationship surviving this ordeal sounds challenging, it will be advisable for her to get therapy before she ruins any future bonds as well,” Prof. Lobo concluded.

That sounds insightful, doesn’t it? Well, what did you make of the story? Let us know in the comments below!

Folks were aghast at the girlfriend’s behavior, and some even advised the poster to ditch her point-blank

Text post with advice question about children in a relationship, focusing on struggling and torment in love life.

Text post showing a discussion about a lady putting her heart and soul in the relationship while struggling in life.

Text post with the message letting go of a relationship despite putting heart and soul while struggling in life.

Comment from user MuchSeaworthiness167 expressing concern about a toxic relationship ruining life and advising to leave immediately.

Screenshot of an online comment advising to end a relationship due to emotional torment while struggling in life.

Text post from YourWildAmberSloth suggesting counselling to address being used and treated badly in a struggling relationship.

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