Get Premium
Dark mode theme is available exclusively for premium users. Learn more about the benefits of subscribing.
No fees, cancel anytime.
Dark Mode 
No fees, cancel anytime 
then open in external browser
and click "Open in External Browser" 
3.2K
Mom-Of-Three Confesses She Feels Like She’s Wasted Her Education, And Her Honest Letter Goes Viral
A few years ago, Kate Swenson started a blog called Finding Cooper’s Voice to talk about her son’s autism. At first, she poured her heart out daily for just a couple of readers. Kate’s sole purpose was talking about her emotions. Over time, however, more and more people started noticing her sincere texts. Now, the mom has over 560,000 followers on Facebook alone.
If you take a look at any of her uploads, you’ll instantly understand why Kate’s blog is doing so well. She perfectly captures not only her own feelings but the reality of being a parent in general. Few can externalize such complex inner experiences as clear as she does. And this entry is no exception. Titled I Never Knew Being A Mother Would Be So Hard For You, it delves deep into trying to understand what it’s like to be a mom.
More info: findingcoopersvoice.com | Facebook | Instagram
RELATED:
Image credits: Finding Cooper’s Voice
Image credits: Finding Cooper’s Voice
Image credits: Finding Cooper’s Voice
Image credits: Finding Cooper’s Voice
“For me, I am a pretty laid back mom so when I get stressed… it’s really stressful,” Kate told Bored Panda. “Sick kids, deadlines at work and never-ending laundry will do that to a person. I don’t typically have prolonged periods of stress. I would more say they come and go.”
She believes that there are hard moments and even hard days and weeks. But the hard won’t last forever. “So, when I am struggling, I remind myself that this too shall pass. I also really focus on finding joy whenever I can. Meaning, on my hardest days, my nonverbal son may try to say a word or my 7-year-old may score a goal in hockey. I try to focus on those parts. Find the joy in the hard.”
Image credits: Finding Cooper’s Voice
At the end of the day, however, all of her struggles are worth it. “I have the best children ever, an amazing husband and a beautiful life,” Kate said. “The boys in my life make it all worthwhile. I know that for a fact. I am a very blessed mom. But as I’ve aged, I’ve learned that saying it’s hard sometimes helps. Admitting to being overwhelmed does, too. It doesn’t make me weak. It makes me real. In fact, I think it makes me a better mom!”
Parents couldn’t agree with Kate more
What do you think ?
Clavelle 5 years ago
It's no wonder she feels this way. With three boys of different ages (one with special needs) a job, and no time for a hobby or night out with the girls? I think being happy living that way would be abnormal. I do agree she may suffer from depression brought on by stress. Talking about what she is going through is important. I hope her husband is supporting her through this. I'm glad she opened up about how she feels; it's a step in the right direction.
E Menendez 5 years ago
The real problem is that women are still expected in this day and age to take on the majority of the burden of child rearing. I work in a male dominated profession and seeing them with three kids is way different from the women I work with.
Load More Replies...
Mommyofboth 5 years ago
This made me sad. I understand where she is coming from, but I had postpartum depression. Once I had some therapy and got my medication worked out, I finally started enjoying my life. It sounds like she needs to make a plan with either family, friends, or husband and get at least a couple hours a week to herself just to recoup. A little self-care goes a long way and will make her happier and enjoy her children more.
Pittsburgh rare 5 years ago
She either overestimated her stamina and her ability to juggle or she was just too naïve to realise motherhood can be tough. Either way, she should be seeking professional help rather than the FB or IG instant and meaningless sympathy. Or that's precisely what she's in for.
Frankenfrog 5 years ago
I am going to get blasted for this, and I don't care. I have a hard time feeling sorry for anyone who pit themselves in their s****y situation. No one forced you to keep having children after you found out your son is severely autistic. I understand it's not easy being a parent, but no one is forcing these children on you.
deanna woods 5 years ago
I don't think you deserve to get downvoted because everything you are saying is true. I don't understand these people who have multiple children and then complain about how hard it is. Instead of complaining on social media why don't they try to get some sort of psychological help?
Load More Replies...
Leslie Burleson 5 years ago
I've got three autistic children , the oldest is 23 . My husband was initially in the Navy, but after two deployments we realized we couldn't keep with that lifestyle. My husband is a pilot , so he's gone a lot anyways , but not 6 months at a time . I have had to do so much in my own, and continue to do so since autism doesn't go away when they're adults. I've lost myself , found myself, trashed myself , berated myself and hated myself . This autism life isn't for the weak . I use humor to help with the stress. Sometimes if you don't laugh you'll cry ... I almost always choose to laugh. If I can get a good laugh in I always feel better . Fail videos are my go to de-stress tool. So much so that my autistic son has brought me my phone tuned to YouTube fail videos 🤣
NQ L 5 years ago
I knew I didn't want kids since I was a kid. Friends and family members all have kids and I'm not jealous. Sometimes I feel sorry for them. I do babysit to let them have a little free time but then I get to send them all home. Lol I am a mom to my fur-babies (Aussiedoodles). I love them to pieces. No human kids for me. No regrets!!
Demi Zwaan 5 years ago
Yet here you are, with 3 kids, a job and apparently a household to take care of (I'm at a loss why your husband doesn't seem to do much). Maybe making good decisions just isn't your thing. It happens.
MellonCollie 5 years ago
Glad you don't seem to recognize symptoms of depression in what this woman describes, Demi, because that means you never suffered one yourself. I'm happy for you. But let's have some compassion with an overwhelmed mom.
Load More Replies...
Kristina Funkycrew 5 years ago
If this isn't best birth control, I dunno what is. Sounds absolutely terrifying.
Brandy Grote 5 years ago
Cut back on the 6 year old's "very busy social schedule". Kids don't want or need to do everything. Let the baby cry for a few minutes. Make a deal with husband that after he gets home and has dinner, you get at least 30 minutes uninterrupted. He will learn to deal with the kids, you will learn to let go and have time to refill. Your kids can't survive if you are dead.
Clavelle 5 years ago
It's no wonder she feels this way. With three boys of different ages (one with special needs) a job, and no time for a hobby or night out with the girls? I think being happy living that way would be abnormal. I do agree she may suffer from depression brought on by stress. Talking about what she is going through is important. I hope her husband is supporting her through this. I'm glad she opened up about how she feels; it's a step in the right direction.
E Menendez 5 years ago
The real problem is that women are still expected in this day and age to take on the majority of the burden of child rearing. I work in a male dominated profession and seeing them with three kids is way different from the women I work with.
Load More Replies... Mommyofboth 5 years ago
This made me sad. I understand where she is coming from, but I had postpartum depression. Once I had some therapy and got my medication worked out, I finally started enjoying my life. It sounds like she needs to make a plan with either family, friends, or husband and get at least a couple hours a week to herself just to recoup. A little self-care goes a long way and will make her happier and enjoy her children more.
Pittsburgh rare 5 years ago
She either overestimated her stamina and her ability to juggle or she was just too naïve to realise motherhood can be tough. Either way, she should be seeking professional help rather than the FB or IG instant and meaningless sympathy. Or that's precisely what she's in for.
Frankenfrog 5 years ago
I am going to get blasted for this, and I don't care. I have a hard time feeling sorry for anyone who pit themselves in their s****y situation. No one forced you to keep having children after you found out your son is severely autistic. I understand it's not easy being a parent, but no one is forcing these children on you.
deanna woods 5 years ago
I don't think you deserve to get downvoted because everything you are saying is true. I don't understand these people who have multiple children and then complain about how hard it is. Instead of complaining on social media why don't they try to get some sort of psychological help?
Load More Replies... Leslie Burleson 5 years ago
I've got three autistic children , the oldest is 23 . My husband was initially in the Navy, but after two deployments we realized we couldn't keep with that lifestyle. My husband is a pilot , so he's gone a lot anyways , but not 6 months at a time . I have had to do so much in my own, and continue to do so since autism doesn't go away when they're adults. I've lost myself , found myself, trashed myself , berated myself and hated myself . This autism life isn't for the weak . I use humor to help with the stress. Sometimes if you don't laugh you'll cry ... I almost always choose to laugh. If I can get a good laugh in I always feel better . Fail videos are my go to de-stress tool. So much so that my autistic son has brought me my phone tuned to YouTube fail videos 🤣
NQ L 5 years ago
I knew I didn't want kids since I was a kid. Friends and family members all have kids and I'm not jealous. Sometimes I feel sorry for them. I do babysit to let them have a little free time but then I get to send them all home. Lol I am a mom to my fur-babies (Aussiedoodles). I love them to pieces. No human kids for me. No regrets!!
Demi Zwaan 5 years ago
Yet here you are, with 3 kids, a job and apparently a household to take care of (I'm at a loss why your husband doesn't seem to do much). Maybe making good decisions just isn't your thing. It happens.
MellonCollie 5 years ago
Glad you don't seem to recognize symptoms of depression in what this woman describes, Demi, because that means you never suffered one yourself. I'm happy for you. But let's have some compassion with an overwhelmed mom.
Load More Replies... Kristina Funkycrew 5 years ago
If this isn't best birth control, I dunno what is. Sounds absolutely terrifying.
Brandy Grote 5 years ago
Cut back on the 6 year old's "very busy social schedule". Kids don't want or need to do everything. Let the baby cry for a few minutes. Make a deal with husband that after he gets home and has dinner, you get at least 30 minutes uninterrupted. He will learn to deal with the kids, you will learn to let go and have time to refill. Your kids can't survive if you are dead.
Related on Bored Panda
88
57