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Mother Imposes “No Sleeping With BF” Rule On Her Grown Up Daughter, Asks Online If She’s Wrong
Parents are parents for life, no matter how old their children are. And, of course, who hasn’t heard the famous phrase “You’ll understand me once you have your own children”? But it is thought that with years it is getting easier for parents and their children to get along. However, there are still things that are hard to agree on no matter the age. And as we get older, the disagreements between parents and children could determine a broken relationship.
More info: reddit.com
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It takes a lot for a parent to realize that their child is all grown up, but this mother sure takes her time
Image credits: verkeorg
One Reddit user, who is a mother to her already grown-up daughter, is asking whether she is being too sensitive about the idea of her daughter sleeping with her boyfriend when they come to visit her family.
And this mother is not the only one who is looking for answers in this situation. Believe it or not, but debates about whether parents should let their kids sleep with their boyfriend/girlfriend are quite frequent on Google.
This mother asked Reddit users if she’s wrong for imposing her “no boyfriend in bed” rule on her grown-up daughter
Image credits: u/upsetmother12
What draws attention to this particular case is the reactions of other Reddit users. In almost 4.5 thousand comments people are discussing the boundaries parents and children should accept based on their own experience.
Image credits: u/upsetmother12
What intensifies the discussion is some personal information that the woman shares with the audience: her daughter is a 25-year woman who already lives with her 26-year-old boyfriend. So what is all the fuss about you might think?
As the mother and her husband are certain that there should be no sleeping around before the marriage, they do not allow her daughter to sleep with her boyfriend when they come to visit the family.
Image credits: u/upsetmother12
Her daughter, being a respectful human being, decided to comply with her parents’ wishes by not visiting them as often as they would want. This, of course, got her mother upset and lost as the only people who think that this is all right and her daughter is being simply rude is herself and her husband.
A lot of Reddit commentators agree that by flashing her “no sleeping before marriage” card, the mother is jeopardizing her relationship with her daughter.
Image credits: u/upsetmother12
It seems that the main concern with which most of the parents face, especially those who raise daughters, is an unplanned pregnancy. But as the times change, the stigma of becoming a teen parent is also changing.
Instead of saying a brief and strict “no”, most of the parents are now looking for advice on how to talk to their children and how to prepare them for the next chapter of their lives. As we can see, open discussion on various platforms could be one of them.
The online group users were very supportive… of the daughter
Image credits: u/upsetmother12
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What do you think ?
anarkzie 4 years ago
I don't think it's a right or wrong situation, you have your rules but your rules have consequences. If you're not comfortable with your daughter sleeping with her partner in your house then you need to accept that she will not visit you as much.
ADHORTATOR 4 years ago
You said it short and clear, rules have consequences
Load More Replies...
Wilf 4 years ago
I can't imagine what it would be like to value some outdated religious dogma over a strong and loving relationship with your own daughter. How sad that this woman cannot recognise what she is doing to the relationship with her daughter.
beckster308 4 years ago
And we're not even talking about someone who's 18 or 19. We're talking about someone well into adulthood. It's even worse.
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Katrina B. 4 years ago
The whole "who waits three months between seeing their parents" is ridiculous. Before covid, I saw my parents.... twice a year. I can't really afford to travel and didn't have a ton of vacation time. Which is true for most younger people.
Boredzzz 4 years ago
I'd be completely embarrased to visit my parents if I thought they'd be this preoccupied with my sex life. Very creepy.
Marianne 4 years ago
They do realize that their daughter shares a bed with her partner in their shared appartment? I fail to see the point in the parents' house rule.
Ozacoter 4 years ago (edited)
I had that too with my grandmas. I live with my partner for 4 years but when we visit my family they offer him to stay with them in the guest room so we dont sleep together (i dont stay at my parents and book an airbnb to avoid my abusive father but thats a different issue). I always wonder if they think that we sleep in two rooms in our home.
Load More Replies...
howdylee 4 years ago
What if they never get married? Plenty of couples stay together long term but never marry.
Ozacoter 4 years ago
Exactly. Nowadays marriage is not the norm anymore in some places. Depends usually of the laws of the country. In Spain being a registered couple brings you 0 benefits whole being married does so a lot of young people marry in civilian weddings. In Belgium for example being a registered couple is basically the same as being married so a lot of young people never marry.
Load More Replies...
kjorn 4 years ago
same thing happen to my wife and i many years ago. we were living in another city but came back for christmas. her father didn't want us to sleep in the same room. my wife made i quite clear that if i wasn't allow to sleep in the same room we wouldn't be there... like we would have sex while her parent were in the room in the other side of the wall.
Viviane 4 years ago
Wow, did her father have sex strictly for reproduction? "I've been celibate since before you were born, you two can be celibate for a night or two." What an odd duck.
Load More Replies...
blugeagua 4 years ago (edited)
What I don't understand is the mother insisting that they can only sleep in the same bed at their house until after their married. But what difference does it make when they're ALREADY living together and sharing a bed together? They're already sharing a bed at their own house, so what the hell is signing some documents going to change? That mother and father are ridiculous and just plain weird.
Rainy Day Wolf 4 years ago
she's punishing her for not following their religious traditions... the daughter might not even want to get married and this lady is ok with losing her daughter over that...
Load More Replies...
Foxxy (The Original) 4 years ago
They are both in the right. It is their house, their rules but it's also up to the daughter whether she wants to put up with the rules or not. The mother just has to deal with the fact that the daughter doesn't see them more often coz she doesn't agree with the rules. Doesn't mean she doesn't respect the rules coz they do follow them when they stay.
Eslamala 4 years ago
It's the same thing as visiting people who don't drink alcohol or eat meat. You can go and respect that, or not go. It's very simple, actually. I once had a friend who told me I shouldn't smoke in my house when she visits. I told her I would, only if she hid her dogs when I visit her, cause I hate dogs. She got mad and started ranting. The audacity!
Load More Replies...
Terilee Bruyere 4 years ago
Your house, your rules. But playing the victim when your daughter doesn't visit you as often as you expect is just ridicules.
anarkzie 4 years ago
I don't think it's a right or wrong situation, you have your rules but your rules have consequences. If you're not comfortable with your daughter sleeping with her partner in your house then you need to accept that she will not visit you as much.
ADHORTATOR 4 years ago
You said it short and clear, rules have consequences
Load More Replies... Wilf 4 years ago
I can't imagine what it would be like to value some outdated religious dogma over a strong and loving relationship with your own daughter. How sad that this woman cannot recognise what she is doing to the relationship with her daughter.
beckster308 4 years ago
And we're not even talking about someone who's 18 or 19. We're talking about someone well into adulthood. It's even worse.
Load More Replies... Katrina B. 4 years ago
The whole "who waits three months between seeing their parents" is ridiculous. Before covid, I saw my parents.... twice a year. I can't really afford to travel and didn't have a ton of vacation time. Which is true for most younger people.
Boredzzz 4 years ago
I'd be completely embarrased to visit my parents if I thought they'd be this preoccupied with my sex life. Very creepy.
Marianne 4 years ago
They do realize that their daughter shares a bed with her partner in their shared appartment? I fail to see the point in the parents' house rule.
Ozacoter 4 years ago (edited)
I had that too with my grandmas. I live with my partner for 4 years but when we visit my family they offer him to stay with them in the guest room so we dont sleep together (i dont stay at my parents and book an airbnb to avoid my abusive father but thats a different issue). I always wonder if they think that we sleep in two rooms in our home.
Load More Replies... howdylee 4 years ago
What if they never get married? Plenty of couples stay together long term but never marry.
Ozacoter 4 years ago
Exactly. Nowadays marriage is not the norm anymore in some places. Depends usually of the laws of the country. In Spain being a registered couple brings you 0 benefits whole being married does so a lot of young people marry in civilian weddings. In Belgium for example being a registered couple is basically the same as being married so a lot of young people never marry.
Load More Replies... kjorn 4 years ago
same thing happen to my wife and i many years ago. we were living in another city but came back for christmas. her father didn't want us to sleep in the same room. my wife made i quite clear that if i wasn't allow to sleep in the same room we wouldn't be there... like we would have sex while her parent were in the room in the other side of the wall.
Viviane 4 years ago
Wow, did her father have sex strictly for reproduction? "I've been celibate since before you were born, you two can be celibate for a night or two." What an odd duck.
Load More Replies... blugeagua 4 years ago (edited)
What I don't understand is the mother insisting that they can only sleep in the same bed at their house until after their married. But what difference does it make when they're ALREADY living together and sharing a bed together? They're already sharing a bed at their own house, so what the hell is signing some documents going to change? That mother and father are ridiculous and just plain weird.
Rainy Day Wolf 4 years ago
she's punishing her for not following their religious traditions... the daughter might not even want to get married and this lady is ok with losing her daughter over that...
Load More Replies... Foxxy (The Original) 4 years ago
They are both in the right. It is their house, their rules but it's also up to the daughter whether she wants to put up with the rules or not. The mother just has to deal with the fact that the daughter doesn't see them more often coz she doesn't agree with the rules. Doesn't mean she doesn't respect the rules coz they do follow them when they stay.
Eslamala 4 years ago
It's the same thing as visiting people who don't drink alcohol or eat meat. You can go and respect that, or not go. It's very simple, actually. I once had a friend who told me I shouldn't smoke in my house when she visits. I told her I would, only if she hid her dogs when I visit her, cause I hate dogs. She got mad and started ranting. The audacity!
Load More Replies... Terilee Bruyere 4 years ago
Your house, your rules. But playing the victim when your daughter doesn't visit you as often as you expect is just ridicules.
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