“Decided To Tell The Kiddos That We Had Passed Away”: Unhinged MIL Ruins Relationship With Family

Honesty is the best policy. But sometimes parents bend the truth to make life more exciting for their children. They might convince them that Santa Claus is real, let them believe that they saw a mermaid at the beach, or promise that there’s no broccoli in the suspiciously green soup at dinner.

Parents don’t want to traumatize their children by lying to them, though. So when one mom found out that her mother-in-law convinced her children that she and her husband had passed away while they were out of town. Below, you’ll find the full story that the frustrated mother shared on Reddit, as well as some of the replies invested readers left her.

This woman’s mother-in-law watched her children while she had to travel to a funeral with her husband

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But while the couple was gone, the grandmother decided to tell the kids an extremely disturbing lie

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Readers were appalled by the grandmother’s behavior, and the author joined in on the conversation in the comments

Some people even suggested taking legal action against the mother-in-law

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Later, the mom shared an update on what had transpired since her first post

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Image credits: JustNoThrow1990

Readers warned the author that her mother-in-law might actually be ill

Kids always deserve honesty from adults

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Telling the truth isn’t always easy. Whether you want to spare someone’s feelings or avoid a difficult conversation, people are often tempted to bend the truth. In fact, the average person tells at least one lie per day. But it’s always better to be honest, especially when you’re talking to your children.

The Kid Counselor notes that it’s important to tell your kids the truth because they’re going to model the behavior that they see mom and dad exhibit. It’s one thing to tell them that being honest is good, but if they notice that you’re constantly telling little white lies, they’re going to pick up on that. The best way to teach a child is by demonstrating.

Meanwhile, having open and honest communication with your children will build a foundation of trust. If they know that you’ll always tell them the truth, they’ll feel more comfortable being completely honest with you, even when it’s tough. And we all know that trust is the cornerstone of any healthy relationship. 

Learning how important the truth is from a young age can also inform how children view the world, The Kid Counselor notes. If they are taught how to have honest conversations, even about difficult subjects, their world view will be expanded. Plus, they’ll likely be more prepared to handle upsetting and challenging situations that arise in the future.

“Kids should never be made to feel that they didn’t deserve the truth,” The Kid Counselor writes. “Even with good intentions, parents who are not honest with their children about circumstances often learn in hindsight that their children resented being lied to or misled. When you tell your kids the truth, you make it very clear that you expect honesty from them as well – and that everyone deserves to know the truth even if it isn’t what they wanted to hear.”

Setting boundaries with a toxic mother-in-law is necessary

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Another aspect of this particular story is the mother-in-law who went out of her way to lie to her grandchildren. It’s natural for a grandparent to desire a closer relationship with her grandkids, but deceiving them is definitely not the right way to go about it.

When it comes to dealing with a toxic mother-in-law, ChoosingTherapy recommends openly communicating with your partner about their mother’s behavior. Let them know exactly what’s bothering you and how her behavior is impacting you.

Meanwhile, be sure to practice self-care when dealing with a toxic mother-in-law. You may be frustrated, but you shouldn’t forget to take care of yourself. At the same time, try not to take her behavior personally. It likely has nothing to do with you, and she would be treating any other son or daughter-in-law the same way. Give yourself grace.

And of course, don’t hesitate to set and enforce boundaries. Your mother-in-law is not entitled to spend time with your children if her behavior has been inappropriate. You get to dictate how often she visits, how often she sees your kids, and how long she’s allowed to stay. Sometimes, even going no contact is necessary, if that’s the only way to maintain your mental health.

The author then came back with a final update on her mother-in-law’s health and behavior

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Yet again, readers were shocked and shared messages of support for the mother

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