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MIL Is Furious At Son’s Wife For Expecting A Girl Instead Of A Boy, Drama Ensues
MIL Is Furious At Son’s Wife For Expecting A Girl Instead Of A Boy, Drama Ensues
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MIL Is Furious At Son’s Wife For Expecting A Girl Instead Of A Boy, Drama Ensues

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When a soon-to-be mom is expecting her first child, she deserves all the support in the world. Her partner helping her deal with the physical discomfort and ever-changing hormones, her boss allowing her time off when needed, and her family members showing overwhelming excitement for the new addition to the family. There is no room for negativity or judgment directed towards a woman who is working hard to bring a new life into the world.

However, one mother-in-law seems to have missed the memo that pregnant women should be treated with care. 3 days ago, Reddit user Bookfern shared a story detailing how some family drama ensued after her mother-in-law expressed her disappointment in her next grandchild being a girl, rather than a boy. 

Below, you can read the full story that had Bookfern wondering whether she had gone too far in defending herself, as well as some of the replies frustrated readers have left. We would love to hear your thoughts on this situation in the comments, and then if you’re interested in reading another Bored Panda article featuring a mother-in-law being way too hard on her pregnant daughter-in-law, you can find that right here.   

RELATED:

    After being unfairly shamed by her mother-in-law, this pregnant woman is wondering if she went too far when standing up for herself

    Image credits: John Looy (not the actual photo)

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    Image credits: Ashwin Vaswani (not the actual photo)

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    Image credits: Annie Spratt (not the actual photo)

    Image credits: bookfern

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    The soon-to-be mother then responded to some comments calling out the mother-in-law for her outdated views

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    Hundreds of years ago, in many cultures, there was a huge emphasis on having boys, rather than girls, to carry on the family name and legacy. Kings always wanted to have male heirs to inherit the throne, and plenty of other men in powerful positions desired boys to take on their titles as well. However, today, this reasoning does not really stand up. 

    For the vast majority of the world, it makes absolutely no difference whether their children are boys or girls. The goal should just be to have a healthy, happy child, as Bookfern notes in her post. Plus, the sex of a child does not necessarily determine the gender they will identify with 10, 15, or 20 years down the line. There’s no need to have a preference when having children.

    But, as we all know, sexism persists in many ways. Apparently, even in the United States, there is still a slight preference for having boys over girls. According to a 2018 Gallup poll, when asked if they had a preference of gender if they could only have one child, 36% of Americans said they would prefer having a boy. Only 28% said they would prefer having a girl, and the remaining 36% had no preference. 

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    Women tend to have a smaller bias than men, however. 31% of women said they would prefer a daughter, while 30% said they would rather have a boy. Men, on the other hand, were more decisive with their preferences. 43% said they would prefer a son, while only 24% said they would prefer a daughter. 

    Regardless of whether the parents, or grandparents, have a preference or not, it’s really out of everyone’s control. It’s simply up to the father’s sperm to determine the sex of a child, as Bookfern tried to remind her mother-in-law. It is embarrassing to hold outdated views about how children are made and to blame one party for having a “lesser” child, but it would also be incredibly painful for that girl to grow up knowing her grandmother didn’t want her. I’m sure the girl will never have any knowledge of this situation, and I hope that her grandmother will shower her with love, as she would any of her other grandchildren. But clinging onto outdated sexist opinions that boys are more valuable than girls is just sad, and it only causes harm.

    We would love to hear your thoughts on this situation in the comments. Have you ever heard someone express their preference for having a boy over a girl, or were you just as shocked to hear this as the mother in this story was? Let us know what you think, and then if you want to check out another Bored Panda article featuring drama between a mother-in-law and her pregnant daughter-in-law, look no further than right here.  

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    Readers poured out support for the expecting mother, reassuring her that she did nothing wrong

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    Adelaide May Ross

    Adelaide May Ross

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    Howdy, I'm Adelaide! I'm originally from Texas, but after graduating from university with an acting degree, I relocated to sunny Los Angeles for a while. I then got a serious bite from the travel bug and found myself moving to Sweden and England before settling in Lithuania about three years ago. I'm passionate about animal welfare, sustainability and eating delicious food. But as you can see, I cover a wide range of topics including drama, internet trends and hilarious memes. I can easily be won over with a Seinfeld reference, vegan pastry or glass of fresh cold brew. And during my free time, I can usually be seen strolling through a park, playing tennis or baking something tasty.

    Read less »
    Adelaide May Ross

    Adelaide May Ross

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Howdy, I'm Adelaide! I'm originally from Texas, but after graduating from university with an acting degree, I relocated to sunny Los Angeles for a while. I then got a serious bite from the travel bug and found myself moving to Sweden and England before settling in Lithuania about three years ago. I'm passionate about animal welfare, sustainability and eating delicious food. But as you can see, I cover a wide range of topics including drama, internet trends and hilarious memes. I can easily be won over with a Seinfeld reference, vegan pastry or glass of fresh cold brew. And during my free time, I can usually be seen strolling through a park, playing tennis or baking something tasty.

    What do you think ?
    Marianne
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would have asked her what exactly she meant by "try harder to give her husband a boy". Like what did she expect her to do?

    LH25
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'd be tempted to give MIL graphic descriptions of how we had sex and ask if we needed to try a different position.

    Load More Replies...
    Lara Verne
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    MIL needs some basic education. And no, daughters are not "just given away". We don't live in dark ages.

    Hakitosama
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    YES! Glad I'm not the only one that was irked by that line. What da fudge is she planning to do with her granddaughter?!? In OP's shoes, no way in bloody hell would I let that woman any way near my kids!!!

    Load More Replies...
    Leo Domitrix
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The male's contribution is what determines biological sex. Shame th eman, then. MIL was out of line.

    Monday
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't really understand how people don't click on to that. How would a woman randomly produce a Y chromosome to make her baby a boy? Only one place that Y can come from.

    Load More Replies...
    Katy McMouse
    Community Member
    Premium
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I can say, from my own experiences with my MIL, that she absolutely was right in what she said and how she said it. If you aren't lucky and do not have an idiot for a MIL, boundaries need to be established early on. I had problems with mine, starting from the day we brought our first baby home and if I had not been too meek to defend myself in the beginning, I might have had at least the semblance of a relationship with the moron I got for a MIL. I'm not calling her that because I don't like her - she truly is a moron who thinks she's more smart and clever than she actually is. I've dealt with toddlers with more intelligence, common sense and respect for others than my MIL.

    Kate Jones
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If nothing else, how horrible to react that way to news about the baby. It's like she had to take away the joy of the announcement because it wasn't fitting in with her idea of the perfect family. I despise the entirety of that old-fashioned idea that you can't have as much pride in having a girl as a boy. I will never understand it except in the sense that a boy won't have to face the same sexism and being considered lesser while in the freaking womb so maybe that's why you're grateful for a boy. So horrible.

    Ladytron
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Husband didn't like that she implied that mil was stupid? Well.... maybe highly misinformed or undereducated sounds better then? I find it equally hilarious and sad how little people (even women) know about womens bodies. Like she had anything to do about the sex of the baby. With that logic she should be angry with her son. Besides - there's absolutely no guarantee that the biological sex you are born with will determine your gender later on, so this is very irrelevant.

    Mary Ryan
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Biological sex is what you are. You can change the outward appearance but you CANNOT change biology

    Load More Replies...
    Trillian
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would be way more offended by her stereotypical ideas of gender and worth thereof than her lack of knowledge about conceiving.

    Ariom Dahl
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Heh, MIL needs a course on basic human biology.

    Chich
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Maybe her next child will be a boy - who takes his wife's name when he marries :)

    Nikki Sevven
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Since it's the sperm that determines the sex of the child, why didn't she blame her own son for not trying harder to have a boy?

    Load More Comments
    Marianne
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would have asked her what exactly she meant by "try harder to give her husband a boy". Like what did she expect her to do?

    LH25
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'd be tempted to give MIL graphic descriptions of how we had sex and ask if we needed to try a different position.

    Load More Replies...
    Lara Verne
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    MIL needs some basic education. And no, daughters are not "just given away". We don't live in dark ages.

    Hakitosama
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    YES! Glad I'm not the only one that was irked by that line. What da fudge is she planning to do with her granddaughter?!? In OP's shoes, no way in bloody hell would I let that woman any way near my kids!!!

    Load More Replies...
    Leo Domitrix
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The male's contribution is what determines biological sex. Shame th eman, then. MIL was out of line.

    Monday
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't really understand how people don't click on to that. How would a woman randomly produce a Y chromosome to make her baby a boy? Only one place that Y can come from.

    Load More Replies...
    Katy McMouse
    Community Member
    Premium
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I can say, from my own experiences with my MIL, that she absolutely was right in what she said and how she said it. If you aren't lucky and do not have an idiot for a MIL, boundaries need to be established early on. I had problems with mine, starting from the day we brought our first baby home and if I had not been too meek to defend myself in the beginning, I might have had at least the semblance of a relationship with the moron I got for a MIL. I'm not calling her that because I don't like her - she truly is a moron who thinks she's more smart and clever than she actually is. I've dealt with toddlers with more intelligence, common sense and respect for others than my MIL.

    Kate Jones
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If nothing else, how horrible to react that way to news about the baby. It's like she had to take away the joy of the announcement because it wasn't fitting in with her idea of the perfect family. I despise the entirety of that old-fashioned idea that you can't have as much pride in having a girl as a boy. I will never understand it except in the sense that a boy won't have to face the same sexism and being considered lesser while in the freaking womb so maybe that's why you're grateful for a boy. So horrible.

    Ladytron
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Husband didn't like that she implied that mil was stupid? Well.... maybe highly misinformed or undereducated sounds better then? I find it equally hilarious and sad how little people (even women) know about womens bodies. Like she had anything to do about the sex of the baby. With that logic she should be angry with her son. Besides - there's absolutely no guarantee that the biological sex you are born with will determine your gender later on, so this is very irrelevant.

    Mary Ryan
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Biological sex is what you are. You can change the outward appearance but you CANNOT change biology

    Load More Replies...
    Trillian
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would be way more offended by her stereotypical ideas of gender and worth thereof than her lack of knowledge about conceiving.

    Ariom Dahl
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Heh, MIL needs a course on basic human biology.

    Chich
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Maybe her next child will be a boy - who takes his wife's name when he marries :)

    Nikki Sevven
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Since it's the sperm that determines the sex of the child, why didn't she blame her own son for not trying harder to have a boy?

    Load More Comments
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