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Male Vulnerability: 30 Men Open Up About The Last Time They Cried
Crying is a healthy way to process your emotions, and it can have a range of emotional and physical benefits. It activates the parasympathetic nervous system, which, in turn, puts us in a “rest and digest” mode, helping our body relax after a time of stress. Crying releases oxytocin and endorphins, hormones that can soothe pain and lift our mood, helping us feel better.
Still, many find it difficult to do. Especially men. Yes, they have significantly lower levels of prolactin (another hormone, only this one is found in emotional tears) compared to women, but societal stereotypes and expectations discourage them from displaying emotional tears. However, suppressing your feelings can make it harder to cope with life and seek support.
In an attempt to encourage folks to open up, Redditor u/xeowa made a post on the platform, asking men when was the last time they cried and why. Luckily, many stepped up and shared their answers.
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#1
Crying in my car right now. My wife has cancer. It scares me to death. I have to be brave at home. My car has become my place to escape to cry and release my fear and sorrow
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#3
Last night sent my girlfriend the basic Good night message. She replied back with “I love you”. Sat there and started crying over the fact that she is the most important person in my life and that I'm so lucky that this woman loves me.
#4
Last September. There was a recent shooting here. While it was happening, my kids were getting texts on who it was and all of their internet postings. His intentions were to shoot up their high school on the first day of class. He got impatient, and instead shot up our local grocery store a week before. My daughter asked me if she could skip the first day of school. It was that moment that I realized our society had completely failed our children. We talked about it and she mentioned that everybody thinks it is pathetic that older people have completely given up on them. That is when I realized that they are just as intelligent as we are...and they realize that all of us adults are "Pathetic". We just let people [end] them and they recognize that.
#5
A couple of years ago I had a dream about my mom. I was just talking, catching up, then I remembered she passed away. I just hugged her and started crying, yelling 'I miss you!' She hugged me back and said 'I miss you too.' Then I woke up and cried for 30 minutes.
#6
January 4th. On January 1st, I got a message from my dad that the family dog had a stroke and passed away in the front yard. During the time before I stood at his grave just before I left to head back to my home, I just didn’t cry, I was questioning why I wasn’t. Then standing at his grave, just a rush of emotions came in and just sobbed my heart out, then got in the car with my girlfriend and had to drive home. His name was Snitchel and he was a good 14 year old pupper. I’m 21, so he was a part of my life for about 70% of it. Was hard to say goodbye, especially because I wasn’t able to see him on Christmas because I got Covid, and I didn’t get to see him open his Christmas gifts like he usually does, during Christmas and in general during his final days.
#7
Two weeks ago. When it really hit me how much I let my managers abuse me. I quit a few days later and I start my new job on the 27th.
#8
December last year, my wife shared with me that we are pregnant. It’s something we have both wanted for such a long time, when she showed me the test I was so happy I just burst into tears right in front of her.
#11
May 2021. My wife had a cerebral stroke. I thought that I will lose her, by death or by being a vegetable/incapable of communication. I felt like a log at the sea, purposeless, aimless. We have a daughter and I knew that I should remain strong for her, but my wife give me purpose... Without her, I'm incomplete. I'm less. Just for God's grace she survived with almost no side effects.
#14
Tonight. My best friend told me that I don't make her happy, and that she doesn't want me in her life anymore. I'm in love with her. Despite the username, I'm a man, not a lesbian.
#16
At the hospital with my 2 year old daughter. She just had a seizure in the waiting room. I felt so lost and useless... But it cut the wait time down to seconds!
#17
Earlier today. Reading a story about a 6 year old kid that was gunned down by his s**t step-father. His gap-toothed smile in the photo set me off. I cannot comprehend the capacity to harm children like that.
#18
I don't remember. I feel so sad and lonely sometimes but I still can't cry. I wish I could cry like a kid again.
#19
Hey man, let me tell you, it's been a while since I last cried. But, that's not because I'm trying to be tough or anything. I just haven't been in a situation where I felt like crying. I think it's important for guys to recognize that it's okay to cry and show emotions. The last time I cried was when my grandpa passed away a few years ago. It was really tough to say goodbye to him and I couldn't hold back the tears. It felt good to let it all out though, and I think it helped me to process my emotions and come to terms with his passing. So, guys, don't be afraid to cry when you need to. It's a sign of strength, not weakness.
#22
I have a cat, one day he got sick and when the vet checked on him he said he needed to go to surgery right away, the chances of survival were low. Came back home that day bawling my eyes out thinking it was all over, he was so happy and normal one day and the next he was at risk of dying. Luckily the two surgeries went great and he survived.
#25
I've been posting this a lot lately: several weeks ago my former best friend and neighbor either broke into my house or had someone else do it for him and stole money from me. When I confronted him about this he physically assaulted me. The punches and the throwing me into the hedges cracking my ribs didn't make me cry, I took it, but later on when I realized he was in only using me and our friendship was completely a sham and was permanently severed is when I broke down. I still haven't gotten over it. My ribs are finally healed and the bruises are gone (I do have a nasty scar on my eyebrow though that might never go away), but even today I still feel sad over losing what I thought was a good friend.
#28
A few months ago as I picked my dog up from the side of the highway. She was a prolific digger and liked to wander.
#30
About 2 years ago, was dealing with a lot of work an personal s**t, was at my limit of s**t I can handle. I get a phone call that a childhood friend that I've known since we were 4 died in a car accident.
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