Some people’s dating troubles boil down to a simple issue, that their preferences and standards are, at best, unrealistic and at worst, downright delusional. However, actually identifying that means allowing a certain degree of self reflection, which they typically fail to do.
A thread recently went viral where someone asked “Fellas... Name something a woman does that SHE thinks is a turn on but it's REALLY a turn off” and it attracted some truly delusional answers that we’ve gathered here. Get comfortable as you prepare to raise an eyebrow, upvote the worst ones and be sure to add your own thoughts in the comments below.
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Being cutesy wootsy and pretending to not know how to do anything. That's gross. I've taught my daughters to be assertive. You can be cute and intelligent.
Preferring capable and intelligent women is 100% a green flag in my eyes.
Duck lips.
If it's delusional to be turned off by this, I share that delusion. I'm also well aware it's not for my benefit, of course.
Ridiculously long nails. Pounds of make up.
Well those are normally just done because the person wearing them likes them
Botox/lip filler.
Ihave had botox for medical reasons many times. It helps reduce migraine-attacks. Put it sure is a funny feeling
Any facial modifications/plastic surgery.
I have never in my life thought a woman looked better with it than she did naturally.
The original purpose of plastic surgery (and it’s ‘plastic’ as in manipulating something to a different shape, not ‘made of plastic substances’) was always to help people with facial deformities, either from birth or through an accident. Fixing a hare lip would come under this category.
Play hard to get, or try and make me jealous. I cleared my calendar to be here ma’am… no foolishness, thanks.
Don't keep bugging me while I'm trying to relax on my game, or watching the game. If I don't bother you during your "me time", let me be during mine.
Constant calling. I can love you and not want to spend every waking moment with you. Especially for falling asleep on the phone. I’m not doing that anymore
When a woman says "you can't handle me" um, ma'am you are not a zoo animal. But luckily you showed me the type of female you are with that alone.
This one is SO over-used though. It should mean "you aren't mature enough to deal with someone who doesn't just conform to expectations" as a quite legitimate complaint, but some people (all genders) use it to mean "You should be more tolerant of my acting out". Unless you've met them a few times, it's hard to know which.
Too much makeup. If your face is on my sleeve after a hug, you've worn too much.
I'd say this one depends on many things. I have friends who are goth / punk and they look absolutely flawless in heavy make-up and razor-sharp eyeliner. Too much make-up is also not my thing, but I'm aware it's necessary to pull some styles well.
When they do the Kim Kardashian makeup and appearance.
Hard agree, the Generic Influencer Look™ is the biggest personality k!ller.
When she talk about how many other dudes want her.
Being in your 30s and and talking like a 19 year old on tiktok.
I'm so tired of this picture. Find pics of a different woman to use. (She's lovely but I see her in every.single.article.)
I may be the weird one here but honestly nothing. I accept all acts of kindness from my woman. That’s part of how I like to be loved.
When she puts on a ton of makeup and does weird damaging stuff to their hair for an event or pictures. I know they want to look cute for me but I love the natural you. Too much makeup is a genuine turnoff. I appreciate the gesture and I understand it but It has the opposite of it's intended affect.
Acting helpless in my presence. Makes me feel like "how do you survive on your own?"
This probably has to do with the idea that 'men need to feel needed' and feel diminished when a woman is perfectly able to take care of her own life because men then have to define their role other than 'provider'. Some weird people even claim that the 'male loneliness epidemic' is due to women being able to sustain themselves without men.
I wouldn’t say “turn off” per se but constantly checking in while I’m working and expecting a full convo. Lemme tell you about my day when it’s over. Good mornings will hold me over til I clock out. I admire it but I feel bad cuz I cant reciprocate it as easily when I’m clocked in
Some men are notoriously bad for doing this, too. My ex used to show up to my job sites and hang out there until he had somewhere to be, or until I was off work. It got me in trouble a few times. My current bf has been doing better at understanding that I can't have my phone on me while working, but he was really bad at messaging me wondering why I wasn't answering him right away early on. (We both had our bad habits to work on and we're both improving ourselves.)
Being mean when not warranted. Had a girl on a first date do it and I asked her about it and she told me that guys like it. I told her well I don’t she insisted. Then wondered why I didn’t want to see her again.
Love me the way i want to be loved and not how you want to love me. Example: I’m not very social and don’t care to be around most people. So don’t plan a party for my birthday because you like to socialize. We can go out just you and I and that’s perfect for me.
I don't think turn off is the right word
But I get irritated when I take care of a chore before my fiancé gets to it and she starts beating herself up for not doing it sooner
I did this to make your day easier, not make you feel guilty
That’s more to do with the psychology of fiancé. It is often behaviour seen in people that were brought up by parent(s) who made them feel guilty if they missed doing something they were told to do. And then don’t let them forget the incident. 😕
If she ever called herself a baddie or said I’m just a girl. ✌🏾
Mothering. The whole ‘have you eaten, let me get you something, you should take a break’ process. I recognize it’s done out of concern and attention, but for me it always feels smothering and infantilizing. I’m a grown man and I can and do take care of myself.
Some men do want a mother for a girlfriend, but f**k it they need to grow up. This is the right attitude to that.
Buying me gifts with my money. Just don’t bother at all. I’ll take a mug from the dollar store you bought yourself vs a ps5 you bought on my card
Backhanded compliments I don’t even think yall realize you’re doing lol “you know you’re really annoying, but I love you more than you annoy me” and I’m just sitting there like “thanks? I think?” 😂
I hate when they ask you what you want for a holiday, and you tell them exactly what you want. Instead of getting you what you want they get something more expensive and they assume you want it because it cost more but you told them what you wanted and now you have to just be grateful. I appreciate it and the effort but because it’s more expensive doesn’t mean I wanted it more than what I actually asked for. Especially if you what you asked for was practical. That’s just my opinion. 🤷🏾♂️
Call me “babe,” especially early in dating/relationship or assign another pet name that I don’t like and continue to use even after I request that she stops.
I'm not a fan of "baby / babe", but it's still slightly better than "daddy". In my book that's the absolute WORST way a girl can call her partner. It's like twenty layers of horrible.
Constantly calling herself a baddie… Baddies don’t have to tell themselves they bad. Sounds very insecure.
Maybe I’m getting older now but wearing clothes that’s too revealing in public. Seen a girl a Walmart in shorts with half the bum out… I just shook my head.
It gets a lot more understandable in the current European heatwave. Yesterday I saw a girl wearing a top that was barely more than a bib, and she was still drenched in sweat. Nah, I'm not judging ya for going out nigh-naked when it's 38° outside.
Takeover what I’m doing as I’m doing it, I be thinking you don’t think I can get it done on my own or that there’s a lack of faith in my abilities
Few years back I was seeing this RN I had met through my job, during intimacy, she grabbed my beard, yanked tf outta it, I winced in actual pain, she thought it was pleasure sounds hated that so much I cut my beard off and haven't grown it back since.
Don’t ask me how I feel then make it all about how YOU feel about the way I FEEL.
Decentralize yourself. If you can.
1.) Fake eyelashes.
2.) Intense use of makeup.
3.) Always getting her breasts out (oftentimes less is more).
4.) Proclaiming how "crazy" she is.
Long fingernails… all Woman to Woman show and tell.
Does that really bother men when we do things to ourselves that are for ourselves and to impress other women?
Asking what I want and then not doing the thing I asked for.
I hate anytime I’m micromanaged or second-guessed
This is a bit tricky. I had a guy who would say he does X, Y, Z around the house and then didn't do it. But when I reminded him because it needed it to be done, it was evil micromanaging. So, a bit of self-reflection is necessary here, but for the sake of the theme of this thread, let's assume that it's the unnecessary sort - and does anyone like that???
I know “some” women need to have a full conversation everyday or want to talk/text throughout the workday but I honestly hate that, sometimes I need time to miss you or when I talk I actually wanna have something to say
Asking a bunch of questions about the same thing:
Like I understand the idea is because she wants to engage in deep conversations with me. But we're not getting to a deep conversation if we're just going round in circles on one subject. Plus after a bit it just feels like you're not listening to me and I don't see a point in talking with you anymore.
Lingerie is annoying, chafes and is dangerous. Wear a man's Tshirt that's too big and nothing else and your guy will find you 100x sexier and can get to pleasing you easier.
I happen to love lingerie and purchase it for myself. Getting it admired by men occasionally is just an added bonus. Besides, I worked hard to get so far that I was confident when wearing fitted clothes - I dont want to go back to the baggy T shirts
Piercing of the septum looking like a bull ...
Animal print...
I can rock leopard print. It's just a print. Not wearing the hide of a leopard. But it keeps reminding of me a lady I saw referenced in many cartoons and shows. The one wearing the cat frame glasses, short hair, red lipstick, a leopard skirt or blouse, and pointy leopard high heels, and I think her name was always Gertrude. Oh, it was Edith Prickley from SCTV.
Lifting weights because we are just trying to get better we’re not trying to impress when we are trying to get stronger
Fellas, the “mothering” is a nurturing instinct just like our “fathering” is a protective instinct.
Plan dates for me Because most the time the date is going to be something she wants to do or something she wants to do as a couple. Its hardly anything that he would like because that means she may have to be bored while he is happy
Or ypu plan em, ay? I can see the headlines.now, "local man discovers effort"
When y'all go from casual to caring and now everything I do pisses you off. Can't laugh if she doesn't find it funny.
For me it’s when she talk about intimacy and she says “I ain’t never got any complaints” like how many reviews do you have 😂
Ummm, when a lady is twerking but she really not that good at it. She wonder why you laughing so hard.
Maybe she's just having fun on the dance floor and doesn't care what you think?
Hair flips ? Over plucking her eyebrows into nonexistence? (Sure sign of neurosis).
I'll probably get lynched by feminist for this, but y'all women must know the difference between:
"Are you done yet? I miss you." vs "Are you still working? You always work."
"I call dibs on your weekend." vs "I already know you'll be busy."
"There you are. I was looking for you." vs "Where have you been?"
Same need. Different energy. One makes us men feel appreciated & wanted. The other makes us feel guilty & bad. Woman are hot with their feminine energy.
When they talk about being old or not being sexy anymore. I hate that.
You should feel comfortable opening up to your partner about your inner struggles, and they should feel comfortable doing the same.
Tattoos.
Hey hoo lol another if keeps men away they are a bonus ,17 n counting despite my age lol
Acting and dressing like your still in high school or college. Also calling a guy daddy. Being a relationship and still dressing like your single.
I'm confused, is there a different dress code for single and not single? I missed this memo! I do find it odd to call a guy daddy, but I think guy expects to dictate how a woman dresses. If you find her style a real turn off, don't date her. Expecting her to change because you honoured her with your presents is not healthy.
they claim they do makeup for themselves then tell you they love themselves. it's all fake. can't love yourself if you put makeup on bc you're seeing nothing but flaws then patch the "flaws" up with a "bandaid"
I mean, it can be just a style choice, just like clothing. A lot of people wear clothes that compliment and enhance their bodies, that's part of fashion. Makeup and hair can be the same.
Make my plate.
It's not a turn off, but kind of annoying since they almost never plate a man sized meal.
Talking bout past sexual experiences.
There's talking and there's bragging. One of those will help you both have a better experience together.
Try to have a conversation while the Knicks are playing👌🏾
Thinking that being a strong woman is about matching up with me in physical strength 😂😂😂 Like Yo, you're supposed to be soft and sweet.
Women aren't supposed to be anything. Unless I'm missing a joke here.
Tryna tag along when I hit the gym.
I don’t have time for someone weaker than me doubling my rest time and I don’t wanna keep removing plates or reminding her of her weight selection every few sets.🥴😩
Being a liberal Democrat.
Why is it delusional to have preferences and turn-offs when selecting a partner? That’s completely up to you.
Well, some of these guys are clearly against their partner being an adult, others are against their partner treating them like an adult, so I'd say yeah, some of these answers are delusional.
Load More Replies...I think I’m the only person who actually read the prompt… “upvote the worst ones” because these answers are delusional…
Yes, I think you must have been. It's only towards the bottom that we're seeing the really delusional, downvoted ones. And they are very much in the minority, as in, most of them are just personal preferences.
Load More Replies...Why is it delusional to have preferences and turn-offs when selecting a partner? That’s completely up to you.
Well, some of these guys are clearly against their partner being an adult, others are against their partner treating them like an adult, so I'd say yeah, some of these answers are delusional.
Load More Replies...I think I’m the only person who actually read the prompt… “upvote the worst ones” because these answers are delusional…
Yes, I think you must have been. It's only towards the bottom that we're seeing the really delusional, downvoted ones. And they are very much in the minority, as in, most of them are just personal preferences.
Load More Replies...
