Photographer Captures Men Before And After Becoming A Father, And The Result Says It All
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Becoming a parent is a truly life-changing moment and a London-based photographer captured the emotional moments that men go through before and right after becoming fathers.
Tom Oldham spent 72 hours capturing the different emotions that fathers-to-be go through before and after entering the delivery room.
“These portraits capture a really powerful moment in the lives of these men and aim to showcase the enormity of becoming a parent,” said the photographer about his project.
The portraits all show tense ‘befores’ and he happy, relaxed, even surprised ‘afters’ of newly made dads.
The project ‘Becoming a Father’ that was commissioned by PlayStation to mark the launch of their new game ‘God of War’, that follows a warrior and on the relationship between a father and a son.
More info: tomoldham.com (h/t Konbini)
Hector Adebambo, 32, from Bromley
“For me, becoming a dad just kicked in naturally, it feels right. I’ve been speaking to my son for nine months and he’s finally here.”
Andy West, 36, from Forest Hill
“I’ve instantly realized that having a child is going to have such a profound effect because I’m always going to be responsible for another person.”
Toan Lam, 34, from New Cross
“When my son was born, my outlook on life changed instantly and I knew that I would need to be there every step of the way to see him grow. Becoming responsible for another human being is the most surreal experience; I can’t quite put it into words but I hope the portraits convey the magnitude of this feeling.”
Pedro Diego Fernandez, 34, from Sydenham Hill
“The birth was much more overwhelming than I expected but I felt amazing as soon as I held my healthy son and saw him open his eyes. I just want to be the best man for my partner and baby.”
Federico Grillo, 34, from Greenwich
“After the birth, as the adrenalin was wearing off, I felt like time had slowed down. I was holding my son and it just felt very peaceful. I know that fatherhood will motivate me to get the best for my family.”
Tom Chappell, 35, from Hindley Green
“I think my priorities will change significantly now that I’m a dad. We only had ourselves to think about before but now everything will be considered with my daughter in mind… and rightly so.”
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This is beautiful and a bit heartbreaking because my child's father chose to not be in our daughters life. My baby deserves the love we all see in these photos.
Yeah, mine did that to the four of us...
Same, he has 4 daughters but is living alone.
My daughter. Yeah. The bio-dad decided not to make contact for three years, then sent her a Facebook message recently. She blocked him. And I feel anguish for my daughter and grandchild, and guilt that my ex decided to do much the same with her. He hasn't seen her since she was 15.
What a jerk...
This happened with my first daughter, he walked out when I was pregnant, and didn't want to see her until she made contact with him 12 years later. He still does not talk to me, but I'm comfortable with him and my daughter finally connecting. Despite what a lot of people say, it is possible to raise a strong, confident, happy, compassionate child without a father; but it's not easy, or ideal. Read, read, read parenting books. Go to parenting classes when you can. Choose other stable male family members to be in her life. Answer every question truthfully and age appropriately. Don't talk negatively about her father, she's half him and it will be painful for her. Do be kind to yourself, and know that you've got this. For all I know your baby is grown, but this advice is for any woman raising a baby alone. Be strong, be committed, be fierce, be open and compassionate. Don't let others lead you down a path of destruction, you and baby deserve the best. The sacrifices are worth it.
Thank you for your response. I truly appreciate your words of encouragement, strength and advice. <3
Stay strong. My father made the same choice, and I am not gonna lie, it was very painful when I was younger. But the more I grew the more I was greatful to my mother, who did an amazing job raising 3 children. I love her so much, and I think he is the big looser in this story, like the father of your children. Your girls are fine, and you give them a lot of love, but you don't see it yet! Be happy Marjorie. :)
Thank you for your kindness and for sharing your experience and strength. <3
WHAT A POOP!!
They are all looking happier afterwards, but I presume the before picture was taken in hospital (same background, in blue, like stuff in hospital)... you know: when your wife is in labour and you are full of stress. So I think happiness is mainly due to the end of the big stress you have just before.
Great concept! It really shows how love and responsibility change people.
This is beautiful and a bit heartbreaking because my child's father chose to not be in our daughters life. My baby deserves the love we all see in these photos.
Yeah, mine did that to the four of us...
Same, he has 4 daughters but is living alone.
My daughter. Yeah. The bio-dad decided not to make contact for three years, then sent her a Facebook message recently. She blocked him. And I feel anguish for my daughter and grandchild, and guilt that my ex decided to do much the same with her. He hasn't seen her since she was 15.
What a jerk...
This happened with my first daughter, he walked out when I was pregnant, and didn't want to see her until she made contact with him 12 years later. He still does not talk to me, but I'm comfortable with him and my daughter finally connecting. Despite what a lot of people say, it is possible to raise a strong, confident, happy, compassionate child without a father; but it's not easy, or ideal. Read, read, read parenting books. Go to parenting classes when you can. Choose other stable male family members to be in her life. Answer every question truthfully and age appropriately. Don't talk negatively about her father, she's half him and it will be painful for her. Do be kind to yourself, and know that you've got this. For all I know your baby is grown, but this advice is for any woman raising a baby alone. Be strong, be committed, be fierce, be open and compassionate. Don't let others lead you down a path of destruction, you and baby deserve the best. The sacrifices are worth it.
Thank you for your response. I truly appreciate your words of encouragement, strength and advice. <3
Stay strong. My father made the same choice, and I am not gonna lie, it was very painful when I was younger. But the more I grew the more I was greatful to my mother, who did an amazing job raising 3 children. I love her so much, and I think he is the big looser in this story, like the father of your children. Your girls are fine, and you give them a lot of love, but you don't see it yet! Be happy Marjorie. :)
Thank you for your kindness and for sharing your experience and strength. <3
WHAT A POOP!!
They are all looking happier afterwards, but I presume the before picture was taken in hospital (same background, in blue, like stuff in hospital)... you know: when your wife is in labour and you are full of stress. So I think happiness is mainly due to the end of the big stress you have just before.
Great concept! It really shows how love and responsibility change people.