“AITA For Losing [It] And Screaming At GF To Get Out Of My House After What Her Stepbrother Did?”

Couples break up for many reasons: infidelity, incompatibility, and constant arguments are just some of the most common reasons. But it’s not often that people break up because their partner’s family member might pose a threat to their younger siblings.

This guy started questioning his girlfriend’s morals after she chose to believe her creepy stepbrother over his 15-year-old sister. The woman saw nothing wrong with the sleazeball coming into the teen’s room to “chat her up.” But her brother was having none of it and prioritized his sister’s well-being and safety.

A couple got into a fight because the GF’s creepy stepbrother tried to “chat up” the BF’s 15 Y.O. sister

Man angrily shouting at a woman in a tense confrontation near a window.

Image credits: Freepik (not the actual photo)

As she didn’t see anything wrong with it and even tried to blame the girl, the BF unceremoniously kicked them both out

Text screenshot discussing a girlfriend, her stepbrother visiting, and a potential conflict.

Text about a tense situation involving a girlfriend's stepbrother and a crying sister.

Text from a story about the incident involving girlfriend's stepbrother entering sister's room uninvited.

Text about confrontation involving girlfriend's stepbrother in a tense situation.

Text excerpt about an intense argument and accusations involving girlfriend's stepbrother.

Woman in green dress sitting by a wall, covering her face with her hands, appearing upset and emotional.

Image credits: Freepik (not the actual photo)

Text discussing a conflict involving the narrator's girlfriend acting as a mediator and the stepbrother being told to leave.

Text excerpt from a story discussing a confrontation between a couple and a stepbrother's actions.

Text describing a conflict involving the girlfriend, her stepbrother, and a confrontation.

Text conversation about a disagreement over stepbrother's actions, with unresolved tension between partners.

Text of a person questioning their actions after an argument with their girlfriend, seeking advice on what to do next.

Image credits: White-Whale-9847

Experts advise reporting harassment even if it’s unlikely to go anywhere; at least there’ll be history of the offender’s inappropriate behavior

Image credits: Kaboompics.com/Pexels (not the actual photo)

The OP and the commenters are right to view the stepbrother’s behavior as a huge red flag. As the experts at Stop It Now! note, inappropriate behavior towards minors doesn’t have to involve any touching. Inappropriately peeking in on a youth or entering their room without permission counts as inappropriate behavior as well.

The Mercer County Advocacy Center explains that adults invading the personal space of minors is not acceptable. They advise grown-ups to take action if they see adults make minors uncomfortable by “ignoring [their] social, emotional or physical boundaries or limits” and refuse to let the minor set their own limits.

The FBI urges parents, teachers, and caregivers to report any adult’s inappropriate behavior towards a child or a minor to the authorities. But, since the OP says he’s from Portugal, individuals may not want to report harassment due to the incompetence of the law.

Or, at least, that’s what the author himself wrote in his update. He believes that the report will probably go nowhere, as the only evidence in the story is word of mouth. Still, he thinks that if the stepbrother ever tries anything like this again, there will be an official record of his past behavior.

Law experts agree; according to MKFM Law, documenting the harassment can be important for future victims. “By documenting multiple incidents over time, patterns can be established, providing a more comprehensive overview of the offender’s behavior,” they claim.

The girlfriend was wrong to invalidate the teen’s experience and words

Image credits: Timur Weber/Pexels (not the actual photo)

The girlfriend in this story tried to downplay the seriousness of the situation by claiming that this wasn’t a big deal. In her eyes, there was no “hard proof” and her stepbrother “ended up doing nothing.” What’s more, she didn’t take her boyfriend’s opinion seriously and tried to deflect the issue and make it about her feelings.

Experts say that deflecting erodes trust and makes open communication difficult. A partner who’s deflecting might change the subject, blame a partner for their own feelings or avoid the issue altogether. Other times, a partner might start acting defensive or playing the victim.

The GF ticked almost all of these boxes when she told OP that he “shouldn’t have raised [his] voice like that and [he] scared her.” She also tried to deflect by redirecting blame to circumstances (“She had been drunk and panicked and hadn’t been thinking clearly”).

The GF also invalidated the 15 Y.O.’s terrible experience by immediately jumping to the conclusion that she was making everything up for attention.

Psychotherapist Sharon Martin explains that validating someone’s feelings doesn’t automatically mean you’re agreeing with them. “We can certainly feel differently, but make the effort to try to understand and empathize with our loved one’s feelings,” she writes.

Martin also notes how invalidation is often a tactic used by abusers. “[They] turn things around and blame the victim and deny or minimize their abusive words or actions.”

“I can’t have a future with her,” the BF wrote in the comments

Reddit comments discussing conflict involving girlfriend's stepbrother and relationship advice.

Reddit comment discussing a situation involving a stepbrother's questionable actions and a boyfriend's reaction.

Reddit comments discussing a girlfriend's lack of empathy and advocacy for SA survivors.

The commenters sided with the boyfriend, calling the stepbrother a huge walking red flag

Reddit post comment advising to break up over a stepbrother incident involving the girlfriend's reaction.

Reddit comment about a 23-year-old chatting up a 15-year-old girl, emphasizing disapproval.

Comment advising breakup due to girlfriend's enabling behavior.

Reddit comment expressing strong disapproval of someone's actions involving a stepbrother, highlighting concerning behavior.

Comment discussing consequences for stepbrother's actions and girlfriend's lack of integrity.

Reddit comment discussing a serious incident involving a stepbrother and advice to call the police.

Reddit post discussing fallout after a girlfriend's stepbrother allegedly behaves inappropriately toward a sibling.

Comment suggesting the girlfriend should be an ex due to accusations about the sister, discussing a relationship conflict.

Reddit comment discussing a girlfriend's stepbrother's actions and relationship advice.

Reddit comment discussing a breakup due to a girlfriend's stepbrother's behavior.

Text conversation about girlfriend's stepbrother incident and reaction.

Reddit comment discussing intense family dynamics involving a girlfriend and her stepbrother.

Text screenshot discussing an incident involving girlfriend's stepbrother and advice to break up.

Text discussion about conflict involving girlfriend's stepbrother and narrator's sister.

Some people even thought the OP didn’t do enough and was acting irresponsibly by getting drunk while a minor was in the house

Comment criticizing responsibility and safety regarding the actions of the girlfriend's stepbrother.

Comment section with a response saying, "Yta for doing so little.

Reddit comment discussing an incident involving girlfriend's stepbrother and advice to report it to the police.

Reddit comment discussing a relationship, suggesting the poster should break up with their girlfriend.

Text from a post discussing risky behavior by a girlfriend and stepbrother.

A couple of days later, the guy posted an update: “I told her, ‘Yes, we’re done'”

Text exchange discussing a meeting in a park, girlfriend appeared upset, referencing comment from user Buttered_Crumpet09.

Text from a conversation about a girlfriend apologizing for her reaction during an argument with her partner.

Text screenshot discussing concerns about stepbrother's behavior and intentions.

Text discussing the stepbrother's potential history of inappropriate behavior and its implications.

Text discussing an emotional confrontation with a girlfriend over her stepbrother's actions.

A tense couple stands in a hallway, the man looking frustrated and the woman facing away.

Image credits: Alena Darmel/Pexels (not the actual photo)

Text screenshot discussing relationship issues and a disagreement about a stepbrother.

Text recounts a conversation where the speaker discusses an incident with their parents and mentions their sister's involvement.

Text from a personal story about reporting an incident and arranging therapy for support.

Text about feeling guilty and upset after trusting an ex, risking a little sister's safety.

Text about favorite comments giving advice on handling a stepbrother situation.

Text from an online post discussing legal background checks in Portugal and underage drinking laws.

Image credits: White-Whale-9847

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