“He Was Upset”: Stepmother Takes Heat Online For Making 17 Y.O. Share The Candy He Bought For Himself With Little Half-Sister
It just so happens that nothing in this world is perfect, and very often marriages break up and new families are formed on their basis. True, the relationship between stepparents and children is not always so cloudless – and most often it depends on the adults.
Since the time of the fairy tale about Cinderella, we are all well-acquainted with this quite traditional story, and from year to year it is repeated in a variety of circumstances. For example, like in this tale from the user u/Street-Rise-2663.
The author of the post has two kids with her husband and a 17 Y.O. stepson from the man’s former relationship
Image credits: Iam Elago (not the actual photo)
The teen recently got a part-time job at Starbucks so he usually spends money on gaming equipment, clothes and snacks
Image credits: Street-Rise-2663
The boy recently brought some snacks home and didn’t want to give any candy to his 8 Y.O. half-sister despite her begging
Image credits: slgckgc (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Street-Rise-2663
The woman ended up threatening to ground the stepson if he didn’t share, and both the boy and his dad were upset with this
So, the Original Poster (OP) says that she has been married for many years, and she and her husband have an eight-year-old daughter as well as a seven-month-old baby. In addition, the OP’s husband also has a 17-year-old son from his previous relationship. Around Christmas, the teen got a part-time job at Starbucks, and since then he has been trying to spend the money he earns on gaming equipment, games and clothes, and also on buying snacks.
One beautiful day, the teenager came home from work with a big pack of snacks, and the author’s daughter, seeing some candy there, asked for one for herself. The boy refused, saying that he bought them for himself with his own money, but the girl continued begging him. As a result, a quarrel broke out, and the OP’s daughter ran in tears to complain to her mom.
She had just put a teething baby to bed (those who have encountered this period in the kids’ life will understand easily…), so she wanted nothing but silence. The woman demanded that her stepson share some candy with his half-sister, and when he repeated his arguments, she replied that, for example, she and his dad also buy groceries with their own money and, following the teen’s logic, then they should not share with him either.
The fight continued until finally the OP threatened to ground the stepson unless he shared the candy with the girl. He eventually obeyed, however, apparently, he complained to his dad, because in the evening the author of the post happened to have an unpleasant conversation with her spouse, who was indignant that his son was treated like a small child, and that the money he earns belongs to him and only him. However, the original poster is not that sure that she is wrong in this situation.
Image credits: Bradley Gordon (not the actual photo)
The situation here is, by the way, very ambiguous. On the one hand, our entire culture and history encourages teenagers to make money from an early age by telling various inspiring stories about John D. Rockefeller, Thomas Edison and Steve Jobs. On the other hand, there are directly opposite stories – for example, about Macaulay Culkin and his father, who actually ruined his son’s career after running his son’s money.
“[Teens] need that power, that statement of being an individual,” US News quote Pegi Burdick, an LA-based financial coach. “Parents need to have boundaries and know when to keep silent.” Moreover, according to experts, if you want your teenager to learn how to properly manage their money in the future, you should close your eyes (and mouth as well) if these expenses seem stupid to you. In the end, the experience gained by personal example is assimilated much better than someone else’s.
Admittedly, most people in the comments also fully share the idea that the teen’s money is his choice, and that if parents are obliged to provide food for their children, then a teenager should absolutely not share with his half-sister if he does not want to. The general message of most commenters is: “Don’t be the Evil Stepmother.” Although some folks in the comments say sadly: “Too late…” So what do you think of this tale’s characters?
However most folks in the comments sided with the author’s stepson, urging her not to be the ‘evil stepmother’
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Without even mentioning who’s who, She couldn’t of made it more obvious who’s the step kid in the situation and which ones her precious cherub who deserves everything 😆
My parents loved to pull the "we provide you food and shelter" card pretty much my entire life. So I was constantly anxious and guilty and learned how to fawn to keep them from yelling at me (which generally meant letting my younger sister take whatever she wanted from my room, including cash I'd earned if she happened to find it). They now claim they don't understand why I have PTSD from my childhood and they don't understand why my sister has no boundaries and takes whatever she wants from anyone.
"we give you food and shelter" ... Because you birthed her against her will.
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Love that nobody comes back to the fact that the daughter had to actively snoop to find the candy, so mom is not only rewarding the tantrum but also the prior invasion of privacy that initiated the little Karenette's tantrum...
It's time to teach your child that she A) is not entitled to other people's stuff and while she can ask they have every right to say no b) can't tantrum her way out of any unpleasant situation.
I was thinking that seemed it- I might think differently if the brother was deliberately taunting the sister but it seems like he was discrete with his junk food he wanted for himself. I had multiple siblings of varied age and that kinda situation was taken case by case- a taunt is like an offer but bought with own money and set aside carefully with your name or a note even was treated as -yours- She could get healthier snacks her daughter likes give them an assigned spot with her name so her daughter feels she has that sorta option as well if this is about feeling 'left out'
Load More Replies... This is a perfect example of why blended families can be so difficult. My ex used to target my sons just like this and favor her own kids. She is an ex for that exact reason.
Now, the younger child believes she is entitled to things her brother buys. She will be going through his things and demanding stuff all the time under threat of you'll get in trouble if you don't give it to me. The boy also believes those are the terms, this his upset, not just over a little candy but over being allowed no personal property. To fix it she will need to tell both children she f'd up and hold a firm line with the girl for a while. If she doesn't, he will be out of her house and out of her life as soon as possible and the relationship is toast. Might seem small to her but these things matter.
YTA, mom!! This was an opportunity to teach your daughter about how the "real world" works in terms of getting what she wants, and you blew it! Instead of threatening your stepson to make him share his snacks, which he's bought with HIS own money, you should've backed him up, saying to daughter, "Honey, that's his, he bought it, he said no, move on." You also want to instill in your little girl the value of work, by teaching her how people are paid for the work they do. Start by having her do chores around the house (folding laundry or helping you change baby's diaper, for example), then pay her a couple of bucks per chore. Then teach her how to save some money, whether it's opening a bank account or having a piggy bank at home to put spare change in. That way, she'll have money to buy her own snacks and not bug her brother so much!
Sounds like OP is applying to the Evil Stepmother club. All the kids are minors. It's her legal obligation to buy them food. That one of those minors acquires some food on his own doesn't change OPs obligation, nor does it mean that child assumes some of the parenting duties.
You taught your daughter if she comes running to you whining, she gets what she wants. You need to parent better.
forcing someone to share something is not teaching them how to share, it's teaching them that parents are allowed to bully their children. and BTW, "we buy groceries with OUR money so we can use the same logic" ... uh no. you are the parent and are RESPONSIBLE for providing those things for your children.
This reminds me so much of one of my aunts. I had bought myself some snacks and one of my aunts, one of my uncles and my cousin was visiting. I was eating some of my snacks and my cousin asked for some so I gave her some. A few days later I was snacking again and she asked for some. I told her no (I can't remember why I think I just didn't feel like sharing) and her mom got so mad at me. And she asked one of my other aunts to get my cousin some snacks and told my cousin not to share with me. (My cousin shared anyway because she knew that I had shared and she understood that you don't always have to share your stuff) lol
Lol your aunt literally got your cousin “retaliation snacks” …I bet they were extra delicious.
Load More Replies... OP is TA. Her argument that she and her husband shop for groceries that her stepson eats is ridiculous. Food you buy for meals is a necessity. Snacks are a luxury. OP spends his own money on his snacks so they're his to share as he pleases.
Sorry, not sorry, but what a b***h! Yeah sure, the son could have been nice to his sister and shared his candy, but he bought it himself and didn’t feel like it then. Maybe he’s used to the sister getting preferred treatment - that’s what I’m sensing here. He’s just wanted to keep something for himself. She’s a little brat for snitching and causing a ruckus. That’s how she gets her own way I see.
As the oldest of 5 (by a 10 year difference) my entire life has been shared with my siblings. For the most part I don't mind, when I buy things for myself, I usually get them in expectation that I'll share with my siblings, but they never assume that I will be sharing with them. Unless I have told them they can have something, it will usually sit right where it was left until someone asks about it. Our new thing right now is Capri Sun, I like to take them in my work lunch because I'm an adult and a juice pouch at work makes me happy, I buy 3 boxes every two weeks and said just leave me enough for work. When they put them in the fridge they had separated out 8 specifically for me and even after all theirs were gone and I'd have extra on a day when I forgot to take one to work with me they weren't touched. If she wanted the older sibling to share she should have given him a reason too, like teaching the young one to respect boundaries so that he wouldn't feel the need to hoard his snack
I'm guessing the kid gets that a lot already. No better way to drive a wedge between siblings.
YTA. Parents are LEGALLY required to provide adequate food, shelter, and clothing for their children. It is by no means the same as a 17-year-old buying candy, snacks, and games with money they earned or was given to them. Way to go, Evil Stepmother; you screwed up big time. I can see it now: when Bratty Stepsister has a birthday or Christmas is here, Stepbrother will have no gift for her? Why? Because it's the parents' responsibility, of course. Stepbrother buys his own car, but won't take Stepsister anywhere; after all, she didn't finance the vehicle or pay for gas. Playing favorites with children is a recipe for disaster. Once the stepson moves out, he'll have little to no reason to return. Dad was right in calling his wife out about catering to her kid; she's a Harpy-In-Training.
I hope she learned her lesson. He bought those snacks for himself with the money he earned at his job. Her son is not legally obliged to give his little sister something that he bought for himself with his own money. The Parents are legally obliged to provide their underage children with necessities like food and shelter, not doing so is considered child neglect.
Sounds like she just wanted her daughter to get the candy so she'd shut up and not get the baby anymore upset than she had with her crying. She's definitely TA. Not just because she couldn't explain to her daughter that what her stepson bought was his and he doesn't need to share but because she also chose to give the daughter what she wanted instead of actually being a mindful parent to all involved smh. Shameful
Yes, Wicked Step-Mother, YTA. I don't know why you even needed to ask.
Sorry mom, YTA. You're the adult. You could have handled that better. First, your 8 yr old daughter had no right to pick thru a bag that your step son brought home. Second, you allowed her to be a spoiled brat and cry when she got told no. She's old enough to understand that not everything is hers. You could have said: "that bag belongs to X. I'll get some candy for you when I go shopping." And then do it. Third, you had no right to bring up the food you pay for as parents. That's your job, to feed your family, whether they're your biological children or not. So that was a p*ss-poor argument to make. **Fourth, maybe he could have given a little something to his sister. Just a token. Even tho he bought it, he doesn't have to be so selfish about it to an 8yr. Next time, don't let her see it. Take it directly to his room. Blended families can be a hard adjustment. You aren't making it any easier.
YTA. Another example of people who shouldn't be having children - and now she has 2. Great way to raise more entitled brats for society to have to deal with. 🙄
It bothers me she didn't say his little sister or refer to them as siblings. (Instead her daughter) it also bothers me that he didn't want to share with his little sister. In our house if ur not going to share u don't eat what u have in front of someone else. (not saying he was doing that but it is rude not to offer if u r) He may just not have wanted to open them yet and may have been planning on sharing when he did or eating them in his room) U also don't get ur way at that age by crying for something. Although it is ok for a child to cry if they're disappointed. Give them a hug and let them know u understand they're disappointed but don't give them what they r crying for. That is a (in mommy language) BIG no no !!! Just "snacks" for thought lol
Just a point of clarification: he wasn't eating his snacks in front of her, she went through his bag. Not OK.
Load More Replies... That’s so messed up. You forced your stepson to handover something he had gotten for himself through honest hard work just because you didn’t want to parent your 8 year old. You’re like a school bully making kids hand over their stuff with threats. Your 8 year old can spend her OWN money (or yours) if she wants candy. You stole from him because it took any effort off you to deal with a kid he has zero responsibility for but you do. Comparing his rarely enjoyed treats with daily basic food your legally required to give the dependants iincluding him in your household is a pathetic move. No wonder your daughter is an immature brat with no ability to self regulate, she gets that from her mom. Replace his candy immediately and apologize.
For en dårlig forelder hun er, har selv både voksne og små barn og de minste vet fra barnehage alder forskjellen på mitt og ditt.
Not a good idea. All you have achieved is to teach your daughter how to blackmail people into getting what she wants.
My son is 2 and I am teaching him that concept that he doesn't get everything he wants. My daughter is about to be 21 my SIL is about to be 23. They have a 7month old. They are my son's godparents as well. I buy groceries for us and them to help out since my daughter is still in school. If they buy something I tell them if they don't want to share with him don't let me know what it is he wants do not give into him. I don't like giving my son candy he can have 1piece a week. He has fruit snacks freezie pops jello fruit and veggies. I will have them give him one of those instead. My daughter and SIL gives him stuff I don't when he's out with them but I will never use I buy food for them for them to give into my son. Kids always want what they see. If she never was nosey she would have never known he had candy and would have never asked for any. Nobody have to give anything to anybody's child. I don't care how old they are, or what you do for them. That is your choice and the child is you
Your responsibility. When my daughter was younger and I had my nieces and nephews over and they wanted something she had if I couldn't make it to the store I would just asked my daughter if she can share i would buy her more and give some money. I try to make sure if I know ahead of time that they are coming over that I have stuff for them. If not I try to see if their parents can bring stuff. My daughter is not big on candy she ate more chips and donuts than anything. She babysit and clean around the house or dog walk and wash to earn money. But it's her money and I still brought most of her snacks she still was under 18. People really should teach their kids from an early age you can't get everything you want.
Load More Replies... YTA all day long who tells a 17 year old child that they can keep him from eating their food when you're responsible for them. You can also go to jail for neglect. She's stupid and needs to grow up. She argued with a 17 year old than threaten him. She would have hated me I would have said no punish me than see if I care she still won't be getting none of my candy. As soon as my dad got home I would have told him and would have been off of punishment. Who threatens a kid to share their stuff with another kid. That's call being a bully. She used her authority to get her way for her child. If you want your child to have candy than keep some in the house for them.
I can't choose. I mean that the mother could be tired. I mean with a 7-month year old whos TEETHING that can be pretty tiring. So I can't choose!
I'm surprised you didn't insist he share his money with her as well. Tell us you don't care for this kid without telling us you don't care for him. In my book, your husband is TA for not making sure the woman he's marrying will accept and love his son. Now the poor kid has to deal with a stepmother and spoilt step sibling who threatens his livelihood, sense of security and safety. I feel sorry for the stepson to have to deal with all a that till age 18. Do better.
No one mentioned the 8yo rooting through his stuff. Boundaries.
My rule has always been simple: If big brother is going to eat a treat in a common area he has to share. If he stores and eats personal treats in his room they are off limits. This prevents teasing. However, I'm blessed with a big brother who buys his little brother snacks almost every paycheck. Don't know how that happened. I should add little brother is not allowed to go into Big brother's room and demand treats.
Not the situation here. He wasn't eating his snacks in front of her, the 8yo went through his bag.
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How about Op get up off her butt and go get some candy for her daughter.
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I think it's less about the snacks themselves, and more like principles regarding this post.
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He wasn’t flaunting it he was trying to enjoy his candy and then the 8 year old just happened to see what he had. Edit: And it wasn’t that she happened to see she literally snooped it
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He might be saving some money and spending the rest, but it just wasn't stated in the story.
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🙄. He “let” her go through his bags? How about a discussion first that attempts to encourage the little girl to be okay with being told “no” and not crying to mommy when she doesn’t get her way.
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So mom rewards the little girl with sugar for throwing a temper tantrum, and that part is okay. But dad "backing up" his son for spending money he earned how he sees fit is the issue? I'm glad it sounds like your kids know better, but your kids are not OP's child. It sounds like OP just gives her daughter whatever she wants without ever having to explain to her daughter that "no means no", when it comes to others' things. But by that logic, maybe no one ever explained that to the OP, either.
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Without even mentioning who’s who, She couldn’t of made it more obvious who’s the step kid in the situation and which ones her precious cherub who deserves everything 😆
My parents loved to pull the "we provide you food and shelter" card pretty much my entire life. So I was constantly anxious and guilty and learned how to fawn to keep them from yelling at me (which generally meant letting my younger sister take whatever she wanted from my room, including cash I'd earned if she happened to find it). They now claim they don't understand why I have PTSD from my childhood and they don't understand why my sister has no boundaries and takes whatever she wants from anyone.
"we give you food and shelter" ... Because you birthed her against her will.
Load More Replies... Love that nobody comes back to the fact that the daughter had to actively snoop to find the candy, so mom is not only rewarding the tantrum but also the prior invasion of privacy that initiated the little Karenette's tantrum...
It's time to teach your child that she A) is not entitled to other people's stuff and while she can ask they have every right to say no b) can't tantrum her way out of any unpleasant situation.
I was thinking that seemed it- I might think differently if the brother was deliberately taunting the sister but it seems like he was discrete with his junk food he wanted for himself. I had multiple siblings of varied age and that kinda situation was taken case by case- a taunt is like an offer but bought with own money and set aside carefully with your name or a note even was treated as -yours- She could get healthier snacks her daughter likes give them an assigned spot with her name so her daughter feels she has that sorta option as well if this is about feeling 'left out'
Load More Replies... This is a perfect example of why blended families can be so difficult. My ex used to target my sons just like this and favor her own kids. She is an ex for that exact reason.
Now, the younger child believes she is entitled to things her brother buys. She will be going through his things and demanding stuff all the time under threat of you'll get in trouble if you don't give it to me. The boy also believes those are the terms, this his upset, not just over a little candy but over being allowed no personal property. To fix it she will need to tell both children she f'd up and hold a firm line with the girl for a while. If she doesn't, he will be out of her house and out of her life as soon as possible and the relationship is toast. Might seem small to her but these things matter.
YTA, mom!! This was an opportunity to teach your daughter about how the "real world" works in terms of getting what she wants, and you blew it! Instead of threatening your stepson to make him share his snacks, which he's bought with HIS own money, you should've backed him up, saying to daughter, "Honey, that's his, he bought it, he said no, move on." You also want to instill in your little girl the value of work, by teaching her how people are paid for the work they do. Start by having her do chores around the house (folding laundry or helping you change baby's diaper, for example), then pay her a couple of bucks per chore. Then teach her how to save some money, whether it's opening a bank account or having a piggy bank at home to put spare change in. That way, she'll have money to buy her own snacks and not bug her brother so much!
Sounds like OP is applying to the Evil Stepmother club. All the kids are minors. It's her legal obligation to buy them food. That one of those minors acquires some food on his own doesn't change OPs obligation, nor does it mean that child assumes some of the parenting duties.
You taught your daughter if she comes running to you whining, she gets what she wants. You need to parent better.
forcing someone to share something is not teaching them how to share, it's teaching them that parents are allowed to bully their children. and BTW, "we buy groceries with OUR money so we can use the same logic" ... uh no. you are the parent and are RESPONSIBLE for providing those things for your children.
This reminds me so much of one of my aunts. I had bought myself some snacks and one of my aunts, one of my uncles and my cousin was visiting. I was eating some of my snacks and my cousin asked for some so I gave her some. A few days later I was snacking again and she asked for some. I told her no (I can't remember why I think I just didn't feel like sharing) and her mom got so mad at me. And she asked one of my other aunts to get my cousin some snacks and told my cousin not to share with me. (My cousin shared anyway because she knew that I had shared and she understood that you don't always have to share your stuff) lol
Lol your aunt literally got your cousin “retaliation snacks” …I bet they were extra delicious.
Load More Replies... OP is TA. Her argument that she and her husband shop for groceries that her stepson eats is ridiculous. Food you buy for meals is a necessity. Snacks are a luxury. OP spends his own money on his snacks so they're his to share as he pleases.
Sorry, not sorry, but what a b***h! Yeah sure, the son could have been nice to his sister and shared his candy, but he bought it himself and didn’t feel like it then. Maybe he’s used to the sister getting preferred treatment - that’s what I’m sensing here. He’s just wanted to keep something for himself. She’s a little brat for snitching and causing a ruckus. That’s how she gets her own way I see.
As the oldest of 5 (by a 10 year difference) my entire life has been shared with my siblings. For the most part I don't mind, when I buy things for myself, I usually get them in expectation that I'll share with my siblings, but they never assume that I will be sharing with them. Unless I have told them they can have something, it will usually sit right where it was left until someone asks about it. Our new thing right now is Capri Sun, I like to take them in my work lunch because I'm an adult and a juice pouch at work makes me happy, I buy 3 boxes every two weeks and said just leave me enough for work. When they put them in the fridge they had separated out 8 specifically for me and even after all theirs were gone and I'd have extra on a day when I forgot to take one to work with me they weren't touched. If she wanted the older sibling to share she should have given him a reason too, like teaching the young one to respect boundaries so that he wouldn't feel the need to hoard his snack
I'm guessing the kid gets that a lot already. No better way to drive a wedge between siblings.
YTA. Parents are LEGALLY required to provide adequate food, shelter, and clothing for their children. It is by no means the same as a 17-year-old buying candy, snacks, and games with money they earned or was given to them. Way to go, Evil Stepmother; you screwed up big time. I can see it now: when Bratty Stepsister has a birthday or Christmas is here, Stepbrother will have no gift for her? Why? Because it's the parents' responsibility, of course. Stepbrother buys his own car, but won't take Stepsister anywhere; after all, she didn't finance the vehicle or pay for gas. Playing favorites with children is a recipe for disaster. Once the stepson moves out, he'll have little to no reason to return. Dad was right in calling his wife out about catering to her kid; she's a Harpy-In-Training.
I hope she learned her lesson. He bought those snacks for himself with the money he earned at his job. Her son is not legally obliged to give his little sister something that he bought for himself with his own money. The Parents are legally obliged to provide their underage children with necessities like food and shelter, not doing so is considered child neglect.
Sounds like she just wanted her daughter to get the candy so she'd shut up and not get the baby anymore upset than she had with her crying. She's definitely TA. Not just because she couldn't explain to her daughter that what her stepson bought was his and he doesn't need to share but because she also chose to give the daughter what she wanted instead of actually being a mindful parent to all involved smh. Shameful
Yes, Wicked Step-Mother, YTA. I don't know why you even needed to ask.
Sorry mom, YTA. You're the adult. You could have handled that better. First, your 8 yr old daughter had no right to pick thru a bag that your step son brought home. Second, you allowed her to be a spoiled brat and cry when she got told no. She's old enough to understand that not everything is hers. You could have said: "that bag belongs to X. I'll get some candy for you when I go shopping." And then do it. Third, you had no right to bring up the food you pay for as parents. That's your job, to feed your family, whether they're your biological children or not. So that was a p*ss-poor argument to make. **Fourth, maybe he could have given a little something to his sister. Just a token. Even tho he bought it, he doesn't have to be so selfish about it to an 8yr. Next time, don't let her see it. Take it directly to his room. Blended families can be a hard adjustment. You aren't making it any easier.
YTA. Another example of people who shouldn't be having children - and now she has 2. Great way to raise more entitled brats for society to have to deal with. 🙄
It bothers me she didn't say his little sister or refer to them as siblings. (Instead her daughter) it also bothers me that he didn't want to share with his little sister. In our house if ur not going to share u don't eat what u have in front of someone else. (not saying he was doing that but it is rude not to offer if u r) He may just not have wanted to open them yet and may have been planning on sharing when he did or eating them in his room) U also don't get ur way at that age by crying for something. Although it is ok for a child to cry if they're disappointed. Give them a hug and let them know u understand they're disappointed but don't give them what they r crying for. That is a (in mommy language) BIG no no !!! Just "snacks" for thought lol
Just a point of clarification: he wasn't eating his snacks in front of her, she went through his bag. Not OK.
Load More Replies... That’s so messed up. You forced your stepson to handover something he had gotten for himself through honest hard work just because you didn’t want to parent your 8 year old. You’re like a school bully making kids hand over their stuff with threats. Your 8 year old can spend her OWN money (or yours) if she wants candy. You stole from him because it took any effort off you to deal with a kid he has zero responsibility for but you do. Comparing his rarely enjoyed treats with daily basic food your legally required to give the dependants iincluding him in your household is a pathetic move. No wonder your daughter is an immature brat with no ability to self regulate, she gets that from her mom. Replace his candy immediately and apologize.
For en dårlig forelder hun er, har selv både voksne og små barn og de minste vet fra barnehage alder forskjellen på mitt og ditt.
Not a good idea. All you have achieved is to teach your daughter how to blackmail people into getting what she wants.
My son is 2 and I am teaching him that concept that he doesn't get everything he wants. My daughter is about to be 21 my SIL is about to be 23. They have a 7month old. They are my son's godparents as well. I buy groceries for us and them to help out since my daughter is still in school. If they buy something I tell them if they don't want to share with him don't let me know what it is he wants do not give into him. I don't like giving my son candy he can have 1piece a week. He has fruit snacks freezie pops jello fruit and veggies. I will have them give him one of those instead. My daughter and SIL gives him stuff I don't when he's out with them but I will never use I buy food for them for them to give into my son. Kids always want what they see. If she never was nosey she would have never known he had candy and would have never asked for any. Nobody have to give anything to anybody's child. I don't care how old they are, or what you do for them. That is your choice and the child is you
Your responsibility. When my daughter was younger and I had my nieces and nephews over and they wanted something she had if I couldn't make it to the store I would just asked my daughter if she can share i would buy her more and give some money. I try to make sure if I know ahead of time that they are coming over that I have stuff for them. If not I try to see if their parents can bring stuff. My daughter is not big on candy she ate more chips and donuts than anything. She babysit and clean around the house or dog walk and wash to earn money. But it's her money and I still brought most of her snacks she still was under 18. People really should teach their kids from an early age you can't get everything you want.
Load More Replies... YTA all day long who tells a 17 year old child that they can keep him from eating their food when you're responsible for them. You can also go to jail for neglect. She's stupid and needs to grow up. She argued with a 17 year old than threaten him. She would have hated me I would have said no punish me than see if I care she still won't be getting none of my candy. As soon as my dad got home I would have told him and would have been off of punishment. Who threatens a kid to share their stuff with another kid. That's call being a bully. She used her authority to get her way for her child. If you want your child to have candy than keep some in the house for them.
I can't choose. I mean that the mother could be tired. I mean with a 7-month year old whos TEETHING that can be pretty tiring. So I can't choose!
I'm surprised you didn't insist he share his money with her as well. Tell us you don't care for this kid without telling us you don't care for him. In my book, your husband is TA for not making sure the woman he's marrying will accept and love his son. Now the poor kid has to deal with a stepmother and spoilt step sibling who threatens his livelihood, sense of security and safety. I feel sorry for the stepson to have to deal with all a that till age 18. Do better.
No one mentioned the 8yo rooting through his stuff. Boundaries.
My rule has always been simple: If big brother is going to eat a treat in a common area he has to share. If he stores and eats personal treats in his room they are off limits. This prevents teasing. However, I'm blessed with a big brother who buys his little brother snacks almost every paycheck. Don't know how that happened. I should add little brother is not allowed to go into Big brother's room and demand treats.
Not the situation here. He wasn't eating his snacks in front of her, the 8yo went through his bag.
Load More Replies... How about Op get up off her butt and go get some candy for her daughter.
Load More Replies... I think it's less about the snacks themselves, and more like principles regarding this post.
Load More Replies... He wasn’t flaunting it he was trying to enjoy his candy and then the 8 year old just happened to see what he had. Edit: And it wasn’t that she happened to see she literally snooped it
Load More Replies... He might be saving some money and spending the rest, but it just wasn't stated in the story.
Load More Replies... 🙄. He “let” her go through his bags? How about a discussion first that attempts to encourage the little girl to be okay with being told “no” and not crying to mommy when she doesn’t get her way.
Load More Replies... So mom rewards the little girl with sugar for throwing a temper tantrum, and that part is okay. But dad "backing up" his son for spending money he earned how he sees fit is the issue? I'm glad it sounds like your kids know better, but your kids are not OP's child. It sounds like OP just gives her daughter whatever she wants without ever having to explain to her daughter that "no means no", when it comes to others' things. But by that logic, maybe no one ever explained that to the OP, either.
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