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#1

I was 16 years old when this happened. I was going through a lot. I told my parents I was going for a walk. I did go on a walk, but stopped at the sidewalk and stared at the road. I was crying, really depressed, a car was coming. I almost ran out onto the street in front of the car to end my life. I started forward, but stopped, texted my friend, and told her what happened. No one knew I was suicidal. Not even my friend until I told her. She helped me tell my parents, and I got help. I'm going a lot better now.

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#2

I was 9 years old when I started having suicidal thoughts. Domestic violence and daily scandals between my parents, who then turned their fury on me. At some point I decided I couldn't take the beatings and humiliation anymore. That it would probably get even worse later, and I didn't want to continue living like that. I was 10 when we went on a vacation in the mountains, like a happy family. I gathered some berries from a plant (dane weed) that I knew were poisonous. I hid them under the stairs outside, planning to eat them the next day; however I couldn't find them anymore. Someone had thoroughly swept the courtyard. About 3 years later, after a fight with my mother, I took approx. half of tube of white pills. I had no idea what they were. I had some gastric discomfort, but nothing else happened. I then cried in the bathroom: "look at you, you're not even able to do something so simple." It's been 30 years since then. To this day, my parents have no idea about this. They would probably laugh and dismiss it as "fantasies". Oh, how I wish they were fantasies.

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jennifermullen_student-fuquayvarinams avatar
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Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I’m so sorry you went through this, being in an awful domestic situation is really tough and I’m so glad you lost those berries. :)

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