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Dad Chooses Baby’s Name Saying It’s Meaningful To Him, Mom Can’t Bring Herself To Say It Out Loud
Dad Chooses Baby’s Name Saying It’s Meaningful To Him, Mom Can’t Bring Herself To Say It Out Loud
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Dad Chooses Baby’s Name Saying It’s Meaningful To Him, Mom Can’t Bring Herself To Say It Out Loud

Interview With Expert

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Naming a baby probably is one of the most exciting things in every parent’s life. But together with excitement comes a huge responsibility – won’t the kid get bullied or laughed at? Will it fit them? Will they like it? However, it’s also important to remember that in most naming decisions, there are two people who are responsible and can usually have different opinions.

So it’s no surprise that it may lead to quite an argument sometimes. One Reddit user found herself in such a situation after her partner gave their baby a name that she really hates.

More info: Reddit

RELATED:

    Naming a baby is a big responsibility and is usually both parents’ decision

    Image credits: David Veksler (not the actual photo)

    Woman shares how once her boyfriend found out she’s pregnant, he bombarded her with his ideas for naming a boy and her ideas were quickly shut down

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    Image credits: RDNE Stock project (not the actual photo)

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    She noted that her boyfriend started listing names that belonged to his grandpa and great-grandpa that were Chad and Oliver

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    Image credits: Pixabay (not the actual photo)

    She hates the name ‘Chad’ as they know a couple of Chads and they are not nice people, thus the woman hoped she would have a girl

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    Image credits: Managed_mischiefs95

    Well, it was a boy and despite the woman’s objections, she finally gave up and the baby was named Chad

    Recently, a Reddit user shared her story with one of the communities dedicated to getting personal things off one’s chest. She opened up about hating her baby’s name in which she had no say and still avoids saying his name. The post caught quite a lot of attention and collected 2.5K upvotes and 450 comments.

    The original poster (OP) starts her story by sharing that her boyfriend was overjoyed when he found out she was pregnant and bombarded her with boy names. She noted how her ideas were quickly shut down and he started listing names that belonged to his grandpa and great-grandpa; Oliver and Chad. OP emphasized that she hates the name Chad. She also said she’s not the biggest fan of ‘Oliver’ either but that it’s better than Chad.

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    Then the woman shared how the entire 8.5 months of her pregnancy, she was anxious and was hoping that it was going to be a girl because at least then she would be happy with her name. However, after 13 hours of labor – their baby boy came into the world. When it was time to sign the birth certificate, the woman saw that his name was written as ‘Chad Beau Smith’. 

    OP noted that she ended up fighting with her boyfriend over it, but after about an hour, she gave up and just signed the baby’s birth certificate. Now, after about a month, the woman shared that she still avoids saying the baby’s name and is even disconnecting from her relationship as she feels like she doesn’t matter in the whole situation.

    Community members supported the woman but questioned why she is even in a relationship with such a person. “You’re not overreacting. This is not a frivolous thing and I agree with others, you need to get away from him, because it will not stop with your child’s name,” one user wrote. “Have his name legally changed. Leave your husband. This is abuse,” another added.

    Image credits: Vinicius Maciel (not the actual photo)

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    “It’s very important that both parents feel a positive association with the name, because it becomes your child’s identity,” shared Jennifer Moss, the founder and CEO of Babynames.com with Bored Panda. 

    She added that often couples get into a nonproductive situation where one partner is researching and suggesting names and the other person just vetoes. “It’s important for both parents to come to the table with a list of names so you can brainstorm equally,” Jennifer emphasized.

    We also were interested about specific name trends or fads that she has observed tend to generate more disagreements among parents – “I think the fad of taking a common name and giving it a “creative” spelling has created a lot of debate – not only among parents but on the internet in general,” she noted.

    “Kimberly being spelled Kymberleigh, for example,” Jennifer pointed out that it’s their opinion that parents shouldn’t make their child’s name in the manner of “will they have to spell it for people their entire lives?”

    And finally, it’s obvious that external factors such as societal trends or popular culture have an impact on the parents’ decision when naming their kid and Jennifer agreed that, in fact, they have a huge influence on baby naming. “The name Khloe (with a K), for example, was never on the birth charts until Khloe Kardashian became a celebrity,” she shared.

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    So if you are looking for a unique name for your baby, a fictional character, or just loving names – check out babynames.com

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    As it is clear – the baby should be named by both parents. But what do you guys think about this situation? How should the woman have solved it? Share your thoughts below!

    Redditors didn’t approve of the woman’s boyfriend’s behavior and suggested she legally change the baby’s name

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    Austėja Bliujūtė

    Austėja Bliujūtė

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    Hi, I’m Austeja — an editor with an eye for everything from viral trends to heartfelt human stories. With a background in business management, I bring a mix of structure and creativity to each piece I polish. Outside the editing world, I’m a travel lover and brunch enthusiast who’s always on the lookout for the next binge-worthy show.

    Read less »
    Austėja Bliujūtė

    Austėja Bliujūtė

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Hi, I’m Austeja — an editor with an eye for everything from viral trends to heartfelt human stories. With a background in business management, I bring a mix of structure and creativity to each piece I polish. Outside the editing world, I’m a travel lover and brunch enthusiast who’s always on the lookout for the next binge-worthy show.

    Denis Krotovas

    Denis Krotovas

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    I am a Visual Editor at Bored Panda. While studying at Vilnius Tech University, I learned how to use Photoshop and decided to continue mastering it at Bored Panda. I am interested in learning UI/UX design and creating unique designs for apps, games and websites. On my spare time, I enjoy playing video and board games, watching TV shows and movies and reading funny posts on the internet.

    Read less »

    Denis Krotovas

    Denis Krotovas

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    I am a Visual Editor at Bored Panda. While studying at Vilnius Tech University, I learned how to use Photoshop and decided to continue mastering it at Bored Panda. I am interested in learning UI/UX design and creating unique designs for apps, games and websites. On my spare time, I enjoy playing video and board games, watching TV shows and movies and reading funny posts on the internet.

    What do you think ?
    DrBronxx
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I did have a long-winded comment written, but it can all be summed up in five words: Emmett is a bullying c**t.

    Ace
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Saved the rest of us from writing it as well.

    Load More Replies...
    Tamra
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Maybe this is just me, and I am NOT blaming her, but I'm wondering why she didn't put her foot down before the baby was born? When she saw how little he cared if it was a girl, or when he ignored her wishes about the announcement of the pregnancy, or when he steamrolled her about boy names? I would not have put up with any of that bull s**t. Guy is a douchebag. EDIT: Eh, I've re-read my comment and it does look like I'm blaming her a little, which was not my intention. I understand that people can be mentally and emotionally beaten down, making it hard to leave such situations. I hope she freed herself from him. I stand by my douchebag comment, though!

    Jane Doe
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It didn’t matter. He had it written on the format the hospital and told her to sign. He wouldn’t let her rest until it was done. He sat there u til she gave in.

    Load More Replies...
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    Hphizzle
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Medical-gates comment is correct. Change the name. And yes, this is abuse. Get you and your son away from him.

    Chez2202
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I worry for this poor woman. The bullying about the name went on for almost 9 months. The fact that he told people about her pregnancy at 2 weeks when she specifically asked him not to was bad. The fact that she knew the names from the start but still chose not to know the gender of her child because HE didn’t want to know made this worse and made her worry for over 8 months about this name. Then she still didn’t exert any authority when her son was born. He has total control. She has to step up for herself and for her son.

    Anonymous
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Don't stay with an a*****e who has so little respect for your input regarding your son that he decided to ignore your parenting decisions before the child was even born.

    Xip Dizc
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you hate it now, you will hate it forever. My wife had her heart set on a name, which I hated. I accepted using it as a middle name. Big mistake, I hated it to the point where I never did the "First, Middle, Last name" thing when he misbehaved. Still hate it to this day. Two yeses or one no, that's it.

    alloutbikes@yahoo.com
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    At least your child isn't named after husbands girlfriend.

    Load More Replies...
    D W
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As you aren't married, he had no legal right to name the child (This is a contentious issue that I'm not in agreement with, but in this case since he's bullying you, you could have taken advantage of it).

    Megzymonsta
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My friend had a similar situation but she was in a very abusive relationship and thought she was stuck with the awful name her partner picked. Eventually she realised it was affecting the relationship she had with her baby and this was the sole reason she finally left her partner and changed her son's name (most countries have a law where a person can change their child's name within a certain timeframe) 28 years later she has an amazing relationship with her son and feels that she bonded even more by claiming him back and choosing a name that suited him.

    MR
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Not sure why you used the word "but" here as it's literally the same situation.

    Load More Replies...
    Philip Rutter
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You're not overreacting; no one should have to live with a child's name they hate; and NO one gets to tell you what you do or do not hate- that stuff just "is". The middle name option should certainly be livable. But. it doesn't look good, from out here-

    DarkViolet
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If her boyfriend behaves like that over choosing their baby's name, what's next? OP'S decision not to have any more children for a few years, if at all? Where to live? When her in-laws can drop by? In other words, will she have ANY say about anything in their relationship? Doubtful. OP, change the baby's name to one you would prefer, and leave that manipulative piece of equestrial dung. The abuse will only escalate after the vows are exchanged. Hand him his ring, cross the floor, pick up your son, and out the door.

    Load More Comments
    DrBronxx
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I did have a long-winded comment written, but it can all be summed up in five words: Emmett is a bullying c**t.

    Ace
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Saved the rest of us from writing it as well.

    Load More Replies...
    Tamra
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Maybe this is just me, and I am NOT blaming her, but I'm wondering why she didn't put her foot down before the baby was born? When she saw how little he cared if it was a girl, or when he ignored her wishes about the announcement of the pregnancy, or when he steamrolled her about boy names? I would not have put up with any of that bull s**t. Guy is a douchebag. EDIT: Eh, I've re-read my comment and it does look like I'm blaming her a little, which was not my intention. I understand that people can be mentally and emotionally beaten down, making it hard to leave such situations. I hope she freed herself from him. I stand by my douchebag comment, though!

    Jane Doe
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It didn’t matter. He had it written on the format the hospital and told her to sign. He wouldn’t let her rest until it was done. He sat there u til she gave in.

    Load More Replies...
    ADVERTISEMENT
    Hphizzle
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Medical-gates comment is correct. Change the name. And yes, this is abuse. Get you and your son away from him.

    Chez2202
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I worry for this poor woman. The bullying about the name went on for almost 9 months. The fact that he told people about her pregnancy at 2 weeks when she specifically asked him not to was bad. The fact that she knew the names from the start but still chose not to know the gender of her child because HE didn’t want to know made this worse and made her worry for over 8 months about this name. Then she still didn’t exert any authority when her son was born. He has total control. She has to step up for herself and for her son.

    Anonymous
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Don't stay with an a*****e who has so little respect for your input regarding your son that he decided to ignore your parenting decisions before the child was even born.

    Xip Dizc
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you hate it now, you will hate it forever. My wife had her heart set on a name, which I hated. I accepted using it as a middle name. Big mistake, I hated it to the point where I never did the "First, Middle, Last name" thing when he misbehaved. Still hate it to this day. Two yeses or one no, that's it.

    alloutbikes@yahoo.com
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    At least your child isn't named after husbands girlfriend.

    Load More Replies...
    D W
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As you aren't married, he had no legal right to name the child (This is a contentious issue that I'm not in agreement with, but in this case since he's bullying you, you could have taken advantage of it).

    Megzymonsta
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My friend had a similar situation but she was in a very abusive relationship and thought she was stuck with the awful name her partner picked. Eventually she realised it was affecting the relationship she had with her baby and this was the sole reason she finally left her partner and changed her son's name (most countries have a law where a person can change their child's name within a certain timeframe) 28 years later she has an amazing relationship with her son and feels that she bonded even more by claiming him back and choosing a name that suited him.

    MR
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Not sure why you used the word "but" here as it's literally the same situation.

    Load More Replies...
    Philip Rutter
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You're not overreacting; no one should have to live with a child's name they hate; and NO one gets to tell you what you do or do not hate- that stuff just "is". The middle name option should certainly be livable. But. it doesn't look good, from out here-

    DarkViolet
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If her boyfriend behaves like that over choosing their baby's name, what's next? OP'S decision not to have any more children for a few years, if at all? Where to live? When her in-laws can drop by? In other words, will she have ANY say about anything in their relationship? Doubtful. OP, change the baby's name to one you would prefer, and leave that manipulative piece of equestrial dung. The abuse will only escalate after the vows are exchanged. Hand him his ring, cross the floor, pick up your son, and out the door.

    Load More Comments
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