People Love This Page’s Random Sense Of Humor, So Here Are 70 Of The Best Posts

So you’re saying he wood.

F**k those guys

Somebody stop me

OH MY GOD! This is amazing! I need one for my computer desk!

Quit remaking Dune. I don't care what the academy says; trying to remake the Fremen into Baptists was a stupid idea.

That’s one way to get past the censorship…

Toad-ally true.

I have big balls, you have big balls, we all have big balls________

That evil b***h! Anybody know her number? Asking for a friend.

M-oof.

OMG! I'm dying here! Bwahahahahahahaha!

I hope they made manager, because brilliant!

Must be why Taco Bell is my fast food god!

Cream cheese would also work. Because I definitely deserve some cream cheese.

Never thought of it, but yup!

I'm happy to date someone who is as mentally ill as I am, with the caveat that we can't both be spiralling at the same time. This works out OK though as I am rarely calmer then when someone else near me is panicking. Like my subconscious knows that there's only room for one set of panic right now.

LOL. Obviously just scraping by.

I lol'd at this one.

Well, maybe they know you.

You have the right to remain stupid

CloPotato

CloPotato

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Except for my dad, who's cried only two tears once when the cat needed surgery, all the guys I know cry when they feel like it, and I'm glad they're overcoming years of conditioning and are able to express and process their emotions.

Ruined it for everyone else too. Niiice

Ummmmm, what?!

I mozzarella look into this.

CloPotato

CloPotato

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In France I've worked a few jobs and internships that operated like this. If the work's done it's done, if it's not just come early another time and finish it -unless obviously it was a sensitive time with some emergencies.

Not even an adult, but laundry. Especially if you’re going to do it right: separating pale and dark colors, taking out the ones that can’t be machine-dried, removing stains…

Same

I’m passionate about cloth, so sew me!

What?! Candy corn is amazing!

Ohhh Yah, you betcha!

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Yeah, efforts not paying up, seeing the world around us go nuts and about to burst into flames, being surrounded by hatred because a guy in the bus wearing a golden outfit sure is unusual, but old people insulting him for that is just pure rudeness -and I'm not even mentioning systemic problems-, seeing that ai is about to change drastically our relationship to proof and reality, the climate changing and already making our lives difficult if not worse (the surge in deaths this summer is, at best, a mood dampener)... Need I go on?

Nope. Tried it, doesn't work.

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Sorry but if you're trying to make a serious point and summon psychoanalysis I'm not gonna be able to hear you over the sound of my laughter

If the noise didn't do it, the dog whould have smelled it.

Glad to know I'm following the Word!

What's your problem Meg? These are all keepers!

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It would be so cool though, if we could Ben our arms like this

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Cannibal side of twitter

I went to a Hare Krishna vegetarian restaurant in Suva, Fiji. It was excellent. I wish there was one near where I live.

Self aware at least.

I absolutely have to try this.

You think those are scary, just look up a cassowary. Hey, that rhymes!

And looking cool doing it!

At least when they are like that they don't have to pee.

Ummmm, W*F?

Ummmm, if we didn't want that one thing we would probably be hunting you for sport.

So… grey person is intolerant of lactose intolerance.

My grandparents lived with two other couples (inc Grandpas boss) in the forties because their house had been bombed. I think was probably just a house share.

O.K., this is funny.

As a short woman, let me speak for myself: seeking a big man in order to feel safer going out at night in urban settings. We are less likely to get attacked if one of us is very tall.

If your gay, your good. If not, RUN!

What does he eat? His words?

Dammit, you are, not your. My bad.