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If your perfect Valentine's day ideas consist of hating everyone who likes this festivity, then you've clicked on the right post. And it's an even better match if you hate the kitschy side of Valentine's Day, yet like to impress your significant other of how much you don't care about it anyway. In that case, we have a selection of very ironical, deeply sarcastic, totally un-romantic Valentine cards for you to greet your loved one without getting all pukey cute.

Most of us have had enough of the typical Hallmark-style love cards (not that there's anything wrong with them). For couples and romantic singles with a sense of humor or an unconventional approach to romance, there are fun and creative greeting cards like these!

Sure, some of them are not the most romantic greeting cards out there (not that you were looking for one, anyhow), but you've got to give them to the right person for them to be effective. If there's a pant-nullifying Valentine's Day card that you think we've missed, you can add it to this list and vote for your favorite what-you-see-is-what-you-get cards as well!

(h/t: huffpost)

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#21

Funny Valentine's Day Cards

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Sonali Bhatt
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Nice List. Very creative and nice cards. Find more gifts @ http://www.valentine.gifts/

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#26

Funny Valentine's Day Cards

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Liliana Mello
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That's not what a dementor does they take away all your happy memories leave you with your worst memories then they take your soul

#27

Funny Valentine's Day Cards

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#31

I'm Still Not Sick Of You

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Akanksha Patel
Community Member
4 years ago

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#32

You Are The Bacon To My Eggs

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#33

Funny Valentine's Day Cards

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#34

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#35

Valentine's Day Card "you Are My Favorite Nerd"

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Akanksha Patel
Community Member
4 years ago

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#36

Funny Valentine's Day Cards

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#38

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#39

You Warm My Cold Black Heart

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#40

Wood Card "popcorn To My Film"

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#41

You're My Favorite Bitch To Bitch About Bitches With

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#42

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#43

Us Because Everyone Else Sucks

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#50

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#51

Tolerant Panda

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#52

I Hate You

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#53

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#54

Anti - Valentine's Card - This Is Not A Valentine

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#57

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#58

Lorem To My Ipsum

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#60

I'm So Glad I Found You

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#61

Greeting Card "stay With Me" For Valentine's Day

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#62

You Complete Me ...in An Incomplete Way

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Community Member
9 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If you like it you can download the card for free here! https://www.behance.net/gallery/23379947/Free-Alternative-Greeting-Card

#63

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#66

Valentine's Card - I Love Your Beard - Beard Love

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#67

Nuts About You

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#69

Go Away

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#70

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#71

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Sunny Boardman
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Duh-oh. But if it bombs as a Valentine try again on Presidents Day.

#72

More Than I Love Meat

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#81

So Valentine. Very Like. Much Heart. Wow. Doge Shiba Inu

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#82

Worst Candy Ever

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#84

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#85

'rough' By Corrina Rothwell

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#86

I'm In The Bush Outside And I Really Love You

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#87

Parks And Rec April And Andy's Wedding Quote

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#88

I'd Let You Have The Last Slice...

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#89

Left Shark Is Right

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So Fresh

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#91

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#93

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#94

I Want To Twerk With You

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#95

You Make My Life Less Shit

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#96

Adventure Time Bmo

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#98

Let's Get Knotty

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#99

I'm Lost Without You

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#104

Stealth Abs

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#105

Calculus Love... Limit Of My Attraction To You Does Not Exist

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Roger Beukes
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

From the graph, "the limit of my attraction to you as it approaches infinity" is actually zero, and not "it does not exist".

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#108

Your Assets Make My Stock Index Rise

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#109

Cactus Legs

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#110

Dat Ass

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#111

You're Allllll I Think About.....

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#112

bemein

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Rich Uspel
Community Member
6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The FBI has traced some White House communications . . . This one was signed, " Mit all meiner Liebe immer, Stevie, Wir haben es in ein Bordell verwandelt, Bruder!"

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#113

Unknown Anniversary

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Thank You Bar Graph Of Awesomeness

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#116

I'll Give You The V Later...

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#117

Nice Cock

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#118

You'll Do...

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#119

No Thanks...

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#120

Bite Me.

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#121

'role Play'

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#122

Fuck Buddy By Snarkbitecards

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#123

Funny Valentine's Day Cards

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#124

'bridal Wear'

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#125

Holla

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#126

Fuck Buddy By Snarkbitecards

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#127

See Other People By Snarkbitecards

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#128

See Other People By Snarkbitecards

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