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The key to a happy life on Facebook is to only befriend people who aren't very witty. Because as you can see from this hilarious list of Facebook comebacks, having sharp-witted friends can only lead to trouble. Compiled by Bored Panda, these brilliant burns are sure to make you laugh. They'll also make you think twice about writing something the next time you log into Facebook. Don't forget to vote for the best!

#1

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Amanda Panda
Community Member
9 years ago

Mrs. Johanson FTW!

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    #2

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    AcousticGString
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    Actually that's true, it IS based on your browser history. I see stuff I was looking at on Amazon all the time in the ads section.

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    #3

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    Amanda Panda
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    How many people looked at their keyboards?

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    #4

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    Superluminal1
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    Another of Mrs. Johanson's summer school students.

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    #5

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    AcousticGString
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    Damn bruh, that was savage!

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    #6

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    Hans
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    Bad use of citations is best countered by use of citations. Brilliant!

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    #7

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    Mahmoud Ragab
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    Found a meaning for his/her life

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    #8

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    Winter
    Community Member
    Premium
    9 years ago

    Ouch! *giggle*

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    #9

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    Kjorn
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    at least that guys take it well.

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    #10

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    Mahmoud Ragab
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    I rest my case

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    #11

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    AcousticGString
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    lolol geezus!

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    #12

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    AcousticGString
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    That's gotta be frustrating for straight ladies :/

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    #13

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    Master Markus
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    Believe me, I've never seen God. One big contributing factor to my atheism.

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    #14

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    Liz Miller
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    I totally pictured a doctor running through a hospital trying to find his patients

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    #15

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    Vanessa
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    This is so mean... and so funny at the same time! Brillant.

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    Never miss a story that brings joy to the world. Add us on Google

    #16

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    Melody Lanzatella
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    LMFAO!!!!

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    #17

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    Frankie Engelbert
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    Definitely an awesome response.

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    #18

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    AcousticGString
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    S**t, let me go get you some ice for that burn!

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    #19

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    Kjorn
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    i want that address. a pizza delivery in 20 sec that's good!

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    #20

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    Hans
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    Har har har

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    #21

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    Kjorn
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    i must be really tired or this is really funny but i almost c**p my pants reading this one

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    #22

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    Silent Skeleton
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    lmao self burn

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    #23

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    Amanda Panda
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    I have literally seen someone put as their status "I think someone is breaking into my home!" ... and you are on FB and not calling 911?

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    #24

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    Mirriam Banda
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    i can make simple children books sound dirty

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    #25

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    BMP7777
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    Oh man that was ugly

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    #26

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    Kjorn
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    take that Claire!

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    #27

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    Justin time
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    If he's looking at young girl eating lollipops and thinking 'yeah, penis' he probably should be on some kind of sex register...

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    #28

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    Kjorn
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    f*cking funny! That's the kind of friends guys have

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    #29

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    Mahmoud Ragab
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    Agree

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    #30

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    macah
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    That's not really a burn, just stating a fact, no?

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    #31

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    Anna Brandigi
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    How many of these people actually went to school?

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    #32

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    Hans
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    Very good!

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    #33

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    Justin time
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    Sarcasm level: Dad!

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    #34

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    Long Joan Silver
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    Yay Clive!

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    #35

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    Mahmoud Ragab
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    Sure thing

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    #36

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    Amanda Panda
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    top 8? Is he talking about Myspace?

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    #37

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    Theodora Kane
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    Love it. And agree.

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    #38

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    Jamal W
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    HA! GOT EM!

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    #39

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    Melody Lanzatella
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    Are there reeeeally idiot guys that say s**t like this????

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    #40

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    Cameron Johnson
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    flames? o.o

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    #41

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    Hans
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    A very valid proposition.

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    #42

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    Long Joan Silver
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    Hahahahaha gang banged by crayola

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    #43

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    Kookfilosoofia
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    this one made me laugh

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    #44

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    Anna Brandigi
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    when facebook users try to be poets

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    #45

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    CluelessLlama13
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    This is funny to me because only female mosquitoes are bloodsuckers. Male mosquitoes have a diet similar to a butterfly's.

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    #46

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    Amanda Panda
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    LMAO SICK!

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    #47

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    JEFF THE KILLER
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    exactly.....

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    #48

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    Laura Lunn Jackson
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    It sure is a fun disease/addiction

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    #49

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    Cameron Johnson
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    Oh Joel...

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    #50

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    Catalina Ioan
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    In all fairness, she missed an apostrophe too (male's)

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    #51

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    Hans
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    Yep, definitely for Molly.

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    #52

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    Hans
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    Too much blurred here...if I remember this correctly, Nicole is of African American origin, which gives a whole different aftertaste...

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    #53

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    Silent Skeleton
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    I wanna be friends with Caitlin

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    #54

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    J.E.C.
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    These are so much more entertaining than reading what my friends post.. lol

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    #55

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    Lexi Nicodemus
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    Kinda feel like this is promoting rape culture...

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    #56

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    Natalia Claudio
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    This isn't really an epic comeback, just a silly pun...

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    #57

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    Grey Arias
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    Maybe he is a co

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    #58

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    Lazy Panda
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    Really? Sleeping body parts is NOTHING

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    #59

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    BoredBunny
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    Denial...I LOVE IT.

    #60

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    brandon sat
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    not true, Mufasa showed Simba the sky in the Lion King ;-)

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    #61

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    Mahmoud Ragab
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    Unless the templates are erotic

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    #62

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    Pamela Beuret
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    what "GPA" stands for? I'm from Chile, have no idea :)

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    #63

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    Hans
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    Ouch.

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    #64

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    Mahmoud Ragab
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    Damn tough

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    #65

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    Joanne Palmer
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    hahahahahaha funny stuff!!

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    #66

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    Master Markus
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    This is a silly "imagine" scenario. "What if we had dubstep in the 90s?" We'd have dubstep in the 90s. It's not like dubstep is a social movement or big cultural revolution. I don't like dubstep, and because I don't look for it, I hardly ever hear it.

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    #67

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    DaPandaMonium
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    xdamation point lol

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    #68

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    Sreejith Embranthiri.C.V
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    HIV Aladheen

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    #69

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    Tillie Martinussen
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    Oooooh no. 🙊🙊

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    #70

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    Brooke Skinner
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    They lost me at god...

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    #71

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    Flora Polvado
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    I used to have a big disk. But then we signed up for cable.

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    #72

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    #73

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    Kristen Hdz
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    well that was helpful, anyway.

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