144 Brutally Hilarious Comics For People Who Like Dark Humor (Cyanide &#038; Happiness)

Bumble 7 years ago

Lol- this highlights the ridiculousness of woman's nips- which are actually used for breastfeeding being taboo when a man can point his at everyone and it is fine!!!

19points

otaku fox 7 years ago

Why can't they just censor women's nipples with men's nipples?

8points

Stella Rose 7 years ago

I'm surprised the woman's nipple doesn't have its own religion by now, if it's so sacred...

5points

Nami Tantrum 7 years ago

one of my favourites

5points

Prince Maroochy 5 years ago

Plot twist: The censored nipple was his own...

4points

Randy Baker 7 years ago

Free the nipples!

3points

Ed Souza 7 years ago

I see no problem with women showing their nipples. Not at all...

3points

BusLady 7 years ago

Or their boobs? Lol

2points

Captain Planet 7 years ago

Replace nipples with guns shooting people. Then you can show it again. :D

2points

Cees Timmerman 7 years ago

'murica!

0points

Mishai. Gardezi 6 years ago

I dont understand why men can show there nipples and its totally cool but when it's a woman she's called a "s**t" and its totally unacceptable!

1point

#2

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

377points

POST

issam 7 years ago

Lol.

72points

Night Owl 7 years ago (edited)

LMAO and ROFL

14points

LOttawa 7 years ago (edited)

Sharon... get out of the way...

7points

Don Flynn 7 years ago

but he is correct - any story is better than Twitlight

4points

~hUmMuS vIbEs~ 4 years ago

lol i agree twilight is a bit crap, i just read it for the memes

0points

Jörg Zingler 7 years ago

Hit him, now, seriously.

4points

RockyDude47 7 years ago

Lets get this to the top

3points

Samantha Robinson 7 years ago

Dad: No one disrespects Twilight! Team Edward all the way! Sharon: Wait, you're Team Edward?...

2points

BusLady 7 years ago

Time to cut the Internet and take away his devices.

1point

Mixedupste 7 years ago

Anything is better than twilight!!

1point

Weird Gaming Emo 5 years ago

Not the milk fanfiction if y'know what I'm talking about

0points

potato 1 year ago

5 years ago...

0points

bermi endersby 3 years ago

let me hit him sharon

0points

#3

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

336points

POST

TheBlackPanda 7 years ago

Oof!

28points

Aaron Kara 7 years ago

Bang! You just got taught!

5points

Don Flynn 7 years ago

get a job kid!

2points

Astrid Emery 7 years ago

The kid's height is proportionate to that of a six-year old. He's telling a first grader to get a job.

2points

Parmeisan 7 years ago

I think everyone else is missing that this *is* the joke. I think it's a commentary on baby boomers and how they assume that everyone is the newer generations is just lazy, no matter the actual situation.

5points

Mixedupste 7 years ago

yeah!! get a job little timmy

2points

Kaeden 5 years ago

Ha!

1point

Robbie Wood 7 years ago

Haha

1point

James Grey 7 years ago

My sister needs to see this

1point

violetta 7 years ago

oh thank you, I am laughing so hard -- is it okay if I print this out and put it on my fridge? someone I live with needs to see this!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

1point

Bumble 7 years ago

LOL!!

1point

#4

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

335points

POST

meAgan 7 years ago

Oh, c**p.

87points

Hans 7 years ago

Admittedly, before becoming a father I also thought babies looks generic. Pretty much like you cannot easily distinguish apes of the same size. However, what is depicted here would not happen to parents. It is a hilarious way to illustrate self-absorbedness of many young parents, though.

34points

Night Owl 7 years ago (edited)

Not being a parent all little babies look almost the same to me but I always assumed something like this wouldn't work on real parents. Now that I think about it there were cases when the hospital accidentally switched babies but the parents noticed it wasn't theirs, although there were rare cases where the hospital managed to convince them they were wrong. The list of real life cases and the after switch techniques in hospitals on wikipedia are a interesting read: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Babies_switched_at_birth And here's the newest case: https://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-india-42743982

9points

Honesty Olishia 7 years ago

Reminds me of that story in the Bible where the two ladies were arguing about whose baby it was and the woman who was lying said she was okay with cutting the baby in half and taking half of it.

13points

James Grey 7 years ago

First thing that came to mind, also.

4points

PeachPossum 7 years ago (edited)

We only assume that the spiteful one was not the mother of the child, but what if she were? Either of the women could have been the birth mother. King Solomon's concern was for the welfare of the baby and chose the woman who demonstrated the most love. Whether she was the child's "real" mother does not matter in the end, because she loved the baby. That is the definition of a real mother.

3points

Nikki D 7 years ago

Wasn't that King Herod that did that?

-1point

Ruth Mayfly 7 years ago

Panel 4 is hypnotic. Eternal swirling babies!

6points

King Kona 7 years ago

They are identical twins

4points

BusLady 7 years ago

Plot twist: These 2 people are actually married and these are their twins.

3points

John Smith 7 years ago

Solomon, is that you?!

3points

Aaron Kara 7 years ago

That's cold bru

3points

Nikki D 7 years ago

Mmmmm, cold brew.

3points

Ryan Baker 5 years ago

Plot twist: they both belong to the woman on the right

1point

ABIGAIL STOPPS 6 years ago

Neither of them is yours

1point

#5

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

334points

POST

Ladies and Gentlemen 7 years ago

According to internet, a small itch on your butt can lead to testicular cancer!

90points

Hans 7 years ago

And vaccinations lead to autism. And baking soda cures HIV. And ...

21points

lindsayaotter 7 years ago

It's true. Even if you are a female with no testes.

14points

diane a 7 years ago (edited)

I had slight swelling and redness on one lower leg once- half an hour on the internet and had self-diagnosed myself with Lymphodoema and was staring at pictures of ulcerated elephantine legs worried as hell

12points

SykesDaMan 7 years ago

Brain cancer!*

6points

Paul Hutton 7 years ago

for both male and female

1point

Susann Campbell 7 years ago

I'm a female and so I'm in denial.

1point

Shannøn Renee 7 years ago

So... as a woman without testicles, I can still get testicular cancer due to an itch on my butt. I wonder if those itches are really what is at the root of people being trans? (I’m obviously joking and I’m an LGBTQ advocate)

1point

Jake 2 years ago

What? WHAT!? I HAVE TESTICULAR CANCER?!?! Xp

0points

Ashe 4 years ago

As I read this I got an itch

0points

Kenny Kulbiski 7 years ago

Never ever check symptoms on the internet. The results are all the same for all symptoms. You're going to die. Painfully.

6points

Night Owl 7 years ago

We're all going to die, more or less painfully *shrug*

2points

Matt Richardson 7 years ago

I cant really disagree with this one.

4points

Aaron Kara 7 years ago

That's not untrue

2points

Pickle me Elmo 4 years ago

I mean he’s not wrong

1point

Jeremy Sandberg 4 years ago

wait so the internet is cancer?

1point

Hawk 7 years ago

I was once watching a cyanide and happiness video on YouTube, I looked in my suggestion when it finished and all I saw was buzzfeed... I’m scared for life now

1point

William Wang 3 years ago

Thanks I needed to know that (that will haunt me forever)

0points

Elisaurous uwu 6 years ago

Amen, brother. Amen.

0points

Jahnia Delgado 6 years ago

Facts

0points

#6

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

321points

POST

Aaron Kara 7 years ago

I like the way God, the all powerful, all knowing creator needs a bat to do this guy in

112points

Mary McConnell 7 years ago

and hides in the shrubs...

17points

Martha Meyer 7 years ago

More fun that way!

9points

Ohio Hands 7 years ago

Maybe its personal

2points

Susann Campbell 7 years ago

That would not be God, just someone dressed to look the part. LOL

2points

AnAloneGoose 4 years ago

Ever seen that paradox about god making a mountain to him for even him to move? This man is that mountain

0points

rhyan lumilay 7 years ago

and He still have his halo

0points

Quant 7 years ago

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QZ8hefESt7c

0points

John L 7 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Madzdad the bard 7 years ago

All I can picture is Nancy Kerrigan crying, "Why!!!, Whyyyyyy!!"

5points

Lola 7 years ago

This is so wrong, but so funny.

4points

OOF 7 years ago

He should have Smite him

4points

BusLady 7 years ago

Run!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh, wait, he can't.

3points

Aria FAFAT 7 years ago

Drake...

3points

Last Hurrah 7 years ago

I wonder what God's batting average is?

2points

Don Flynn 7 years ago

plan B it is

2points

Bill Thomas 7 years ago

My life story in 3 panels!

2points

Małgorzata Kurpiel 7 years ago

Great

2points

#7

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

310points

POST

Hans 7 years ago

Ouch

76points

Bumble 7 years ago

I think it is abhorrent for a woman to let a man believe they are the father of their child when they aren't. My (ex) friend did this and then told him 4 years later when they broke up and he tried to get custody. It is heartbreaking and should be illegal.

17points

BusLady 7 years ago

That is heartbreaking, especially for a child.

9points

Grumble O'Pug 7 years ago

Until I zoomed in on the tiny “dna test” I did not get it

4points

Stacey Rene' 7 years ago

Glad you pointed it out.

1point

Laura Zaini 7 years ago

:)

4points

BusLady 7 years ago

Well, she's right. It wasn't his fault.

3points

Silver Arts 7 years ago

I don't get it..

2points

Aboubacry Lam 5 years ago

they did something to get the wife pregnant thats all that i can say :)

2points

Theysaid Iamapoet 7 years ago

It really was not his fault

2points

Don Flynn 7 years ago

these are so f'n funny!!

2points

Sandra Amazing Star 3 years ago

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHH OH MY GOSH

0points

Emmacorn 3 years ago

It is his fault tho

0points

#8

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

305points

POST

Ladies and Gentlemen 7 years ago

That's the only cute Hitler pic I have ever seen!

128points

Diana R 7 years ago

cute Hitler pic. Three words I never thought I'd see together lol

53points

Oli Wolfe 7 years ago

Have you seen camp camp? Dolf is the cutest!!!

5points

Elisaurous uwu 6 years ago

ever seen hitler in shorts

1point

Emily Larsen 4 years ago

This comment has been deleted.

0points

Aaron Kara 7 years ago

That bastard Hitler found a loop hole!

17points

BusLady 7 years ago

Don't worry. They will figure it out and put him on the next shuttle to Hell.

6points

glowworm2 7 years ago

I shouldn't, but this one made me laugh really hard.

6points

I love cats 5 years ago

Me and my other Jewish friends wonder if this happened constantly

4points

Red 7 years ago

When he just realised

3points

ABIGAIL STOPPS 6 years ago

Hitler should go to hell Rip in peace Anne Frank

2points

Diana R 7 years ago

Whoa - mind blown (literally, in Herr Hitlers case)

2points

Sahin Parvin 7 years ago

Poor joke

1point

BusLady 7 years ago

OMG! The bullet wound....

1point

James Grey 7 years ago

Omg😂😂😂 I've always said it. That bastard could get away with anything.

1point

#9

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

286points

POST

Hans 7 years ago

For many prude parents this sounds realistic.

79points

holyshit 7 years ago

lol. it's all because of technology the new generation knows more about it.

11points

MnM2520 7 years ago

our parents dont teach us. We teach ourselves

15points

glowworm2 7 years ago

Hah, this one's cute!

10points

Nikki D 7 years ago

Why are people downvoting you? It WAS cute!

5points

Kjorn 7 years ago

yeah… kids today learn sex in porn movie. not really good education though

4points

Yodelis Sosa 3 years ago

There is Waay More Information out there other than Porn!! A Lot Are Actually Educational, You just have to find it.

1point

BusLady 7 years ago

But, how did they make the kid then?

3points

Yodelis Sosa 3 years ago

There is Way More Things You Can Do In Bed than just a traditional P in V in Missionary. He may be looking to Spice Things Up, Lol!!

0points

John Smith 7 years ago (edited)

The questions come more startlingly realistic. Like, “daddy, mommy? What does f***ing mean? I read it on the bathroom wall.”

2points

HOT CHOCOLATE <3 5 years ago

yeah but my ELEMENTARY school wall....

0points

RockyDude47 7 years ago

This is true for most.

2points

Jeremy Porter 7 years ago

"Let's talk about you and me, let's talk about sex"

1point

Pinky Pop 7 years ago

I knew that was coming... old joke

1point

Jeremy Sandberg 4 years ago

now that's got switch

0points

#10

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

266points

POST

Hans 7 years ago

Mean clouds!

45points

Alyse 7 years ago

Nah bro those clouds spillin truth tea

14points

King Kona 7 years ago

Look in the last panel he starts sweating

14points

OOF 7 years ago

Clouds know the truth

11points

Jeremy Sandberg 4 years ago

it does lol

1point

glowworm2 7 years ago

That cloud knows what you did.

5points

Celental Midnight 7 years ago

I mean maybe the cloud is right. Why would he be sweating so hard if the cloud was lying???

4points

Kjorn 7 years ago

i like the sweat on his shirt

4points

BusLady 7 years ago

What does a sex offender look like? If we knew that, they would all be locked up before they hurt anyone.

3points

Hendra Lim 7 years ago

well, we can't judge book by it's cover. though there's many books fit's it's cover

0points

Shaylynne Gosnell 7 years ago

i imagine clouds doin some stuff like this

3points

BusLady 7 years ago

What you been smoking? Lol

1point

Mixedupste 7 years ago

haha!! Love that

3points

Elena Adams 7 years ago

he's sweating oh my god

3points

#11

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

254points

POST

Grazina Strolia 7 years ago

YESSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

78points

Jessamyn Zolcznski 7 years ago

Don't you mean Noooooooo! Or Ewwwwwwww!

9points

BlackExcel 7 years ago

I wish more and more people understood this...

32points

Ryo Bakura 7 years ago

Patriotism is ridiculous.

12points

Shannøn Renee 7 years ago (edited)

That’s ‘Merica for ya....

9points

Grumble O'Pug 7 years ago

Nailed it!!

7points

Education Iskey 7 years ago

Or waging his finger at Karpernick

6points

Don Flynn 7 years ago

yep

1point

Lindsey Rose 2 years ago

YAS SLAYYY!

0points

Max Barnes 2 years ago

Same guy on Independence Day* You don't call Christmas "December 25th" Cut it out, Yanks.

0points

Maeve Valentine 3 years ago

😳😳🤢🤢

0points

#12

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

249points

POST

meAgan 7 years ago

Use your talent to the full.

62points

OOF 7 years ago

If only you could eat your problems like that guy

13points

Diana R 7 years ago

He was asking for it

10points

James Grey 7 years ago

I like this way too much.

5points

Hendra Lim 7 years ago

that's why we need to watch our mouth

2points

Jo Choto 7 years ago

Fatty O'Chubfarts.

2points

BusLady 7 years ago

He won't insult anyone else.

2points

Raul Elizondo 4 years ago

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

1point

Basil Adler! (he/him) 3 years ago

Me

0points

#13

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

246points

POST

Matt Richardson 7 years ago

This made me laugh way more than it should have.

97points

Swetha Umashankar 7 years ago

Same

4points

Vlad Horobet 7 years ago

For such a bad pun ,he kinda deserved it.

4points

Pavel Sapozhnikov 7 years ago

Ba dum tss

2points

Grumble O'Pug 7 years ago

Ok that was funny!!

2points

Jeremy Sandberg 4 years ago

LOL

0points

#14

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

242points

POST

Livia 7 years ago

Dat face tho

73points

$copper-fractions avatar$

Tiny Dynamine 7 years ago

See the other comic about internet phrases. :D

5points

AliFab 7 years ago

My answer when people ask why my husband and I aren't planning to have kids, lol

8points

Heidi Bean 7 years ago

My brother, who is a proclaimed bachelor always says with a big smile, "No wife, no kids, no plants no pets."

4points

jazor 7 years ago

Oh I though he sold them

4points

Cheesecake Queen 7 years ago

Love the face and joke. XD

3points

Hawk 7 years ago

That face gave me cancer

2points

Ashlee Rudolph 7 years ago

BAHA yess

2points

BusLady 7 years ago

Burn!

1point

Natalie Shalane Wheeler 2 years ago

👀

0points

Lily Williams 2 years ago (edited)

Why did it take so long- the blue one is basically broke and has kids which is like a tiny broke bestie who thinks your rich and green guy has no kids in which he non-verbally states that he is a bit richer then the blue guy, resulting in that Egyptian dance.

0points

#15

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

242points

POST

meAgan 7 years ago

Nope, they're all dressed like pandas, and they're RIGHT HERE!!!

179points

Kesyra 7 years ago

I felt so sad for the comic dude but you made it alright with your comment.

31points

Molly Tallmadge 7 years ago

Nice one

10points

Sue Donim 7 years ago

i'd say all dressed as polar bears ... i see no black spots.

5points

Laura Salovitch 7 years ago

Well-played.

4points

Saraisara 7 years ago

Yay!

3points

Elisaurous uwu 6 years ago

i too, am a panda. not a raccoon. definitely not a raccoon.

2points

Foxyloxylou 7 years ago

Alright, 6-foot-longs and cake pops for everyone!

2points

the awesome Piplup 3 years ago (edited)

I'm dressed as Naruto

1point

Dark Pearl 4 years ago

I brought the candy!

1point

Siddharth Rath 7 years ago

This comment has been deleted.

1point

Natalie Shalane Wheeler 2 years ago

Clever 👏 👏

0points

Gillian Gray 3 years ago

IM PO

0points

K Madd 3 years ago

YES

0points

Scp 049 3 years ago

Hold on... I'm a PANDA?! I thought I was a human but I guess not.

0points

inky Panda 4 years ago

=D

0points

StrangerOfTheDark 4 years ago

This comment has been deleted.

0points

Hans 7 years ago

Do not forget about the Ninjas!

6points

Laura Zaini 7 years ago

:(

6points

glowworm2 7 years ago

Aw, poor guy.

5points

SykesDaMan 7 years ago

You shouldn't be sad, you should be scared: Ghosts all over the house!!!

4points

diane a 7 years ago

Aww - this one's sad

3points

Roger Haywood 7 years ago

This reminds me of my birthday. :(

3points

PeachPossum 7 years ago

aw, happy birthday.

4points

Lady Perkele 7 years ago

Is he a pumpkin or a carrot?

3points

Memymo68 4 years ago

Dont cry u have a lot of pandas at ur party....😎🕺

2points

Jeremy Sandberg 4 years ago

that's how i fell when i throw a party

2points

#16

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

239points

POST

anonymous 7 years ago

I CAN RELATE

50points

Cactus Corsage 7 years ago

WHY ARE WE YELLING?!

31points

Elena Adams 7 years ago

CAN YOU?

22points

Destiny nerd 7 years ago

You can relate?

3points

Ashe 4 years ago

Oh! I'm so sorry!

2points

Rami Million 4 years ago

me to

2points

Tasha Love Premium 3 years ago

To which character do you relate?

1point

MJ 3 years ago

what what

1point

Totally a Dragon 7 years ago

I don't get it.

1point

meAgan 7 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Eat Girl 7 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Janine B. 7 years ago

Bwahahaha! Best one.

4points

PurpleDoople 3 years ago

Same guy from earlier

1point

ABIGAIL STOPPS 6 years ago

Poor Kid

1point

Ocgale the Nonexistent 4 years ago

Jim

0points

Bunny Sidhu 5 years ago

Brutal 😂😳

0points

Horijoon Makna 5 years ago

ahhhhh

0points

CIAN MCHUGH 5 years ago

*Maury Povich intensifies*

0points

wisdom evee 6 years ago

i just took a dna test turns out im not tour real dad

0points

Lindy Mac 7 years ago

He's not "Dad"

0points

#17

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

238points

POST

Janine B. 7 years ago

Childproofed my house. They still get in.

135points

Hannah Ingram 7 years ago

reminds me of my neighbours' dog, somehow keeps getting out, but just spends that time on the porch area right in front xD

6points

PeachPossum 7 years ago

reminds me of that commercial where the kid throws a tantrum over candy in the grocery store

2points

Louise Brigance 7 years ago

sneaky little ankle biters

1point

Kjorn 7 years ago

got 3 kids… every… Morning...

9points

Pol Macqueron 7 years ago

Every morning in the weekend. During the week though they can't get up and go to school

2points

TheBlackPanda 7 years ago

Moral of the story: Don't have kids

5points

Janine B. 7 years ago

This one took me a moment. :)))

4points

Cerys Dunbar 7 years ago

i knew i shouldn't of kidnapped him!!

1point

Jeremy Sandberg 4 years ago

LOL

0points

Caroline Murphy 7 years ago (edited)

Christmas Eve I will be able to relate.. I don't have kids but have agreed for my niece to stay with me Christmas Eve. I'll be on my own looking after a 5 year old. I love her to bits but it's going to be super difficult!

0points

Night Owl 7 years ago

I hope he never finds out he's a regret

0points

William Wang 4 years ago

Adult: Good night son Son: Um wait Adult: Well what is it? Son: Well, um I am afraid of the dark Adult: that’s rascist

-1point

Heidi Matsumoto 7 years ago

Was it because of a one night stand?...ohw ... in any way, it's sad that you regret having kids.....

-1point

#18

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

232points

POST

Dawn Baik 7 years ago

i laughed WAY too hard at this one!

95points

diane a 7 years ago

all hilarious

8points

Livia 7 years ago

One of the most brutal rejections ever!

12points

Being_Cori 7 years ago

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

11points

Ben_tenyson 4 years ago

What the f**k

5points

Hendra Lim 7 years ago

s****y question answered with s****y answer

8points

Katie and Jared Coates 7 years ago

Omg I had no idea until I got a goldfish. I mean ribbons for days!

7points

Stacy Rae 7 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

ThatJeremyKid 7 years ago

I feel a bit weird that I laughed so much at this... everyone loves a good poop joke... even if they pretend they don't.

7points

Nick P 7 years ago

wat a way to say "S**T NO"

4points

BusLady 7 years ago

You don't want her anyway. She's a s****y person.

4points

Don Flynn 7 years ago

so gross lol so nasty gross but very funny... note to self: fish c**p proposal not good

2points

KT Trondsen 7 years ago

LOL

2points

#19

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

231points

POST

Ladies and Gentlemen 7 years ago

Didn't expected this ending at all! Hilarious!

94points

Aaron Kara 7 years ago

And they all lived happily ever after...for a short while...then they died because of all the smoke

13points

glowworm2 7 years ago

That ending is fantastic.

7points

Captain Planet 7 years ago

This is actually true most of the time. Those pessimistic sceptic bitches. :( This is why we can't have nice thing. #CigToo

4points

Kjorn 7 years ago

that… weird...

2points

Nikki D 7 years ago

Unexpected!

1point

Dylan Mesamours 3 years ago

no its not

0points

William Wang 4 years ago

So dark

0points

akiwi 4 years ago

How did it take three years to buy a handful of cigarette packages?

0points

Bunny Sidhu 5 years ago

Wtf Tho!!

0points

#20

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

227points

POST

Carol Emory 7 years ago

This is a good one!

55points

Cameron Blackburn 7 years ago

Also laughed so hard at this

7points

Don Flynn 7 years ago

hey, a*****e... lol

1point

Slune 7 years ago

Do I put to much in the picture? But the "a*****e" SS is written like the Nazi SS ....... and then the"oven"!! Please let me be wrong.....This would be blacker then black! That's why I an not sure whether it's a good one

0points

Yodelis Sosa 3 years ago

You're overreacting. The SS looks more like lightening strikes though. And as for everything else, it is Just a Different FONT!! There are so many available Fonts and You can use more than one on anything. Also, I've seen that Same Ss Style on a Lot of Movie Titles. STOP Bringing Race and Evil into EVERYTHING!! THANK YOU!!

0points

James Grey 7 years ago

Just...WOW!

0points

#21

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

200points

POST

Reggie Kraken 7 years ago

LMAO

61points

Siddharth Rath 7 years ago

Stop laughing it's sad...*chuckles while holding breath*

8points

James Grey 7 years ago

His ego just got him prison time. Think with the right head, gents.

10points

IeabellAlakar@aqueenofaplanet 4 years ago

Head, eh?

2points

issam 7 years ago

Wtf.. i loughed too much for this .

10points

BusLady 7 years ago

He'll meet the real pervs in prison.

5points

Tere Rañada 7 years ago

"Id rather go to jail."

4points

diane a 7 years ago

going to google th rest of them when I get through these lol

4points

James Grey 7 years ago

😂😂😂😂😂 OUCH!

3points

Slune 7 years ago

To small to talk about

2points

Lily Williams 2 years ago

I'm not trying to be rude or anything, it is just it disturbs me in the slightest bit that the "to" is supposed to be a "too"

0points

Chenni 7 years ago

That's... Just... Sad.. Lol lol

2points

Heidi Matsumoto 7 years ago

oh my! HAHAHAAHAHAHAH

1point

#22

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

200points

POST

Grumble O'Pug 7 years ago

Lol!!

34points

LOttawa 7 years ago

bwahaha, I think i'll stop ordering dark roast..

5points

Space Nurd 7 years ago

That went from 1 to 100 real fast.

3points

Ohm-Alex 7 years ago (edited)

And that’s how the purple shirted eye stabber came to be

2points

Doob 4 years ago

I finally understand this,

1point

Hawk 7 years ago

Destroyed

1point

Dylan Mesamours 3 years ago

OOF

0points

Memymo68 4 years ago

Places uno reverse card on counter....hehehe🤣🤣🤣

0points

inky Panda 4 years ago

i'm gonna open a coffee shop just to do this

0points

Diddlybop 5 years ago

🤣

0points

#23

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

196points

POST

Ladies and Gentlemen 7 years ago

Please!

45points

meAgan 7 years ago

With sprinkles on top?

12points

Lady Perkele 7 years ago

Me on my period trying to be nice

15points

OOF 7 years ago

Well it is magic...

6points

Cheesecake Queen 7 years ago

Still would've used the spell ^^

5points

Night Owl 7 years ago

That are some interesting magic words. And the snake tounge and glowing eyes...very nice 😈

3points

BusLady 7 years ago

Made the poor guy's eyes bleed. Maybe the 666 had something to do with that.

2points

Mara Julia Mendoza 2 years ago

parseltongue??

0points

Chris Weaver 3 years ago

I dunno. Summoning Cthulhu always worked for me!

0points

Dylan Mesamours 3 years ago

ladies and gentleman,we got em

0points

Whisper 4 years ago

Nah those magic words are perfect

0points

#24

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

193points

POST

Roger Haywood 7 years ago

Plothole found! lol

43points

Zoe Frappier 3 years ago

HAHA LOL

0points

Memymo68 4 years ago

Oh so thats why he has a black/purple eye

0points

Bunny Sidhu 5 years ago

Damn!! Lol

0points

#25

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

177points

POST

OOF 7 years ago

Should have kept the moustache

41points

ThatJeremyKid 7 years ago

This comic has so many layers...

6points

London River 7 years ago

All dem tiny lil' hairs.

6points

Maualo Velflo 7 years ago

The mustache doesn't feel very well Mr. Stark

4points

BusLady 7 years ago (edited)

His only child, obviously. No DNA test needed.

2points

Zoe Frappier 3 years ago

Welp

0points

wisdom evee 6 years ago

oh wow did not see that

0points

James Grey 7 years ago

Damn...

0points

Don Flynn 7 years ago

haha

0points

#26

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

175points

POST

Savant 7 years ago

lol

36points

Don Flynn 7 years ago

ohhhh not nice. I think a good swift kick in the nuts is the next frame

10points

Full Name 7 years ago

This should be much higher

5points

Hawk 7 years ago

Destruction level 9000

4points

Somebody that is bored 7 years ago

SAVAGE

3points

KT Trondsen 7 years ago

OUCH LOL

3points

Roger Haywood 7 years ago

People say that to me.

3points

KENOBI 3 years ago

I don’t get it???

2points

Yodelis Sosa 3 years ago

She's NOT Pregnant. She just LOOKS Physically Pregnant because of how "big" or "fat" she is. That's the Joke. Enjoy!!

0points

Mrs Magoo 7 years ago

OMG I'm laughing so hard right now

2points

OffBrandSweetTea 5 years ago

I don't get it

1point

BusLady 7 years ago

She's just overdue. False alarm.

2points

#27

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

172points

POST

Night Owl 7 years ago

Now you have to pay the fees

101points

Tony Moon 7 years ago

... forever....

7points

Space Nurd 7 years ago

Still a better love story than Twilight.

8points

BusLady 7 years ago

Shoulda returned her sooner?

4points

Ayub Kuraken (Augenstern) 7 years ago

that the same polis on children of bodom logo

2points

La Petite Morte 7 years ago

Good band.

3points

Dylan Mesamours 3 years ago

WOW

0points

Bunny Sidhu 5 years ago

Now you pay, pay the rest of your life 😳

0points

wisdom evee 6 years ago

oh wow

0points

#28

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

169points

POST

Diana R 7 years ago

At first I thought he ate the stripper

95points

Hans 7 years ago

Soon.

14points

Char Char 7 years ago

Whoa, settle down Kjorn.

10points

Emlyn 7 years ago

ME TOO

2points

AshDaBeast 6 years ago

lol me too

1point

Hawk 7 years ago

Well the other two definitely did

1point

Basil Adler! (he/him) 3 years ago

Protein

0points

Ashe 4 years ago

Saaame

0points

ThatJeremyKid 7 years ago

I'm so that guy... I would WAY rather have cake than a stripper...

7points

PyroarRanger 7 years ago

These surprises are fun, but if you don't get a whole cake it's not

5points

BusLady 7 years ago

Maybe he's gay. He just wants cake.

2points

Amy Pattie 7 years ago

I feel this man’s pain

1point

Dylan Mesamours 3 years ago

Imsorry fat dude

0points

CIAN MCHUGH 5 years ago

poor guy

0points

My O My Premium 7 years ago

This is sad!

0points

#29

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

168points

POST

WaLe 7 years ago

Everyone's fear ^^'

51points

danielw 7 years ago

I was waiting for, 'wrong. this is a picture of your lungs."

9points

BusLady 7 years ago

Of a life-long smoker.

0points

violetta 7 years ago

laughing out loud now.....

4points

James Grey 7 years ago

😂😂😂😂😂😂

3points

naomi Olumbori 7 years ago

Lol, i get it, the ink picture from Gnarls Buckley "Crazy" Music video. If you don't believe me here the link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-N4jf6rtyuw . Oh maybe i'm thinking too much...

2points

Lily Williams 2 years ago

It looks like a demon horse with a white halo and 2 boxes next to it...

0points

Yodelis Sosa 3 years ago

I See Two Monsters Wrestling Together. Must Be Godzilla VS Kong in Action!!

0points

Unnamed Hooman 4 years ago

Looks like a crown to me ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

0points

Ashe 4 years ago

It looks like horses summoning satan to me when I zoom in

0points

Mrs Magoo 7 years ago

Yes yes yes, laughing out loud!

-1point

#30

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

166points

POST

Ladies and Gentlemen 7 years ago

That's one extreme way of doing it.

91points

David Feldmeth 6 years ago

thats why its a dark comic

8points

Little Menace 7 years ago

I nearly spat my tea on the screen. Brilliant.

5points

BusLady 7 years ago

Yep, they release that info to the public. All of a sudden the parents care where their children are.

2points

Don Flynn 7 years ago

wow kinda ummm ouch

2points

Nikki D 7 years ago

*listens to kids next door screaming for the 3rd hour* hmmmmm

2points

Liz Todoroni 4 years ago

That is determination

1point

Chris Weaver 3 years ago

The upside of being a child molester.

0points

Dylan Mesamours 3 years ago

ikr

0points

#31

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

157points

POST

ll1Diamond1ll 7 years ago

The eyes tho

54points

Night Owl 7 years ago

and the teeth

6points

Duck Duck 7 years ago

I wanna be this for halloween and scare the s**t outta people

4points

BusLady 7 years ago

Back child support, Dude.

2points

Horijoon Makna 5 years ago

true tho

1point

Tony Moon 7 years ago

This author has an issue with becoming a parent. I certainly hope he/she is able to get over it.

1point

Yodelis Sosa 3 years ago

Yeah, I've Noticed that Too. Which is why I don't find many of these funny as they are all the same or showing everyone that Actually Having Kids is like the worse thing imaginable and Your life will be Ruined completely and You'd walk around like some Zombie or something.... Just Ridiculous!!

0points

Lindsey Rose 2 years ago

WTF HAPPENED TO HIS EYES-

0points

Dylan Mesamours 3 years ago

i dont have any ll(

0points

Genesis Harrison 7 years ago

Awww poor kid 😫😢

0points

James Grey 7 years ago

Oooooh...

0points

Max Palmer 7 years ago

That is a scary costume

0points

#32

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

155points

POST

Christopher Mack 7 years ago

Coffee came out of my nose from trying not to laugh out loud

61points

Max Barnes 2 years ago

No it didn't.

-1point

BusLady 7 years ago

My emotional support is chocolate.

6points

Hurricane Dan Fischer 5 years ago

I look like a fool right now, my bros don't get it

1point

#33

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

153points

POST

Hans 7 years ago

Tyler's still happy :D

112points

inky Panda 4 years ago

because he has a purpose now =D

1point

QueenSKYEE 7 years ago

Aww Dang!! Thats messed up! Tyler is happily clueless!

7points

anonymous 7 years ago

this is gunna be me when im older

7points

Hawk 7 years ago

Me someday

2points

James Grey 7 years ago

😂😂😂😂

2points

BusLady 7 years ago

Chick magnet. Take him for a walk in the park. "Oh, what a cute little boy!"

0points

#34

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

152points

POST

Kenny Kulbiski 7 years ago

Unfortunately I liked this. Now I'm probably gonna be dodging lightning bolts for the rest of the day.

88points

Glowdaddy 7 years ago

HE killed Kenny.

11points

SandaPanda 7 years ago

This comment is funnier than the comic xD

5points

Annete 2 years ago

You are an idiot.

0points

Thomas Bentley 2 years ago

small tip, they cause a lot of air pressure, ozone and static electricity, so if it smells like worms, you feel something hit your head and your hair stands on end, duck and roll.

0points

Thunder 5 years ago

This comment has been deleted.

0points

Genesis Harrison 7 years ago

Lol same.

0points

rhyan lumilay 7 years ago

what if, Jesus really thought about this and crucified because of his prank? I don't wanna end his story that way.

0points

Monilip 7 years ago

Waiting for Muslim "prank comic" now

4points

Lady Perkele 7 years ago

To be respectful with Muslim religion, Allah can't be draw or represented into human form. That's why the mosques are with geometrical or botanic art.

10points

Xiaolaohu 7 years ago

sometimes its ok to just laugh and not be political

3points

Slune 7 years ago

You can't draw Allah. Maybe I can't but I may, because I'm free in my spirit

-1point

glowworm2 7 years ago

Jesus the troll.

3points

Louise Brigance 7 years ago

Laughing my way to hell! Wanna go?

2points

Lady Perkele 7 years ago

Finally this makes sense

1point

Lindsey Rose 2 years ago

I am Cristian and I giggled I'm going to hell now

0points

BOREDOM 3 years ago

what if this actually happened tho

0points

Mrs Magoo 7 years ago

Oh my good god this is way too funny haha

0points

James Grey 7 years ago

I shouldn't find this funny, but....

0points

Don Flynn 7 years ago

take that you hippie bastard... lol hahahahahaha

0points

#35

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

151points

POST

OOF 7 years ago

I WANT ONE OF THOSE

65points

earringnut 7 years ago

*throws money at screen*

8points

Christina Sersif 7 years ago

TAKE MY MONEY!!!

2points

Jessica Temple 7 years ago

Do they sell these on Amazon?

1point

Grumble O'Pug 7 years ago

*orders 100 pairs*

1point

Alex The Fanperson 3 years ago

Gimmee

0points

Dylan Mesamours 3 years ago

oofie

0points

Liz Todoroni 4 years ago

An introverts best friend

0points

Bunny Sidhu 5 years ago

Wow

0points

Gavin Arbour 6 years ago

So do i

0points

BusLady 7 years ago

The introvert's best friend.

0points

#36

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

144points

POST

Randy Dhuyvetter 7 years ago

He's certainly optimistic if he thinks that's "maybe".

39points

Full Name 7 years ago

In some circles that's a resounding yes.

9points

QueenSKYEE 7 years ago

Oh my god!! Bullseye!!

7points

Aaron Kara 7 years ago

BWAHAHAHAH

7points

Petra Christovová 7 years ago

I cannot stop laughing ... "maybe" OMG

6points

OOF 7 years ago

Ohhhh that's gotta hurt

5points

troufaki13 7 years ago

Ouch!

4points

Grumble O'Pug 7 years ago

Lol!!

3points

mulk 7 years ago

mmmmmpffffff ahahahahahah!

3points

James Grey 7 years ago

Oh, s**t! 😂😂😂😂

2points

John Everett 7 years ago

I was laughing too much and couldn't get the mouse over the up arrow for a bit there

2points

#37

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

143points

POST

WaLe 7 years ago

It would have my vote

89points

ADHORTATOR 7 years ago

mine too, because he's cool

24points

Amanda Hollingsworth 7 years ago

still better than trump

17points

Hard 2 Guess 7 years ago

Anything is better than trump.

11points

athornedrose 7 years ago

the most competent candidate we've seen in a long time

3points

Alejandro The Great 5 years ago

here's an even better candidate keyboard-c...39e03d.gif

2points

Reynah Blair 6 years ago

No vote for Rick Astely! He’ll never give you up, let you down, run around, or desert you! Or make you cry, say goodbye, tell a lie, or hurt you!

2points

Kathryn Harterink 7 years ago

Better than Trump

1point

Anna Wentz 7 years ago

Well stocked and keeps its cool. Better than most politicians...

1point

BusLady 7 years ago

Better than you-know-who. At least a fridge is useful.

1point

Alyse 7 years ago

Still better than what we have now

1point

Grumble O'Pug 7 years ago

We could do worse

1point

Amanda Ford 7 years ago

We have done worse

2points

#38

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

143points

POST

Kiss Army Premium 7 years ago

This one gave me the giggles...

32points

James Grey 7 years ago

Yup

2points

Terrapin Harvich 7 years ago

Haha

2points

BusLady 7 years ago

Picasso or Paul Klee?

0points

#39

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

141points

POST

Livia 7 years ago

LMFAO I feel bad for him

46points

Memymo68 4 years ago

Why his first wish came true

0points

Carmen Elena 7 years ago (edited)

at least peace became real.

7points

Full Name 7 years ago

That's quite specific. Who is the author again?

3points

Samantha Comerford 7 years ago

Oh that’s funny

1point

Bob Beltcher 7 years ago

That could be cancer. You should have that checked out.

1point

Basil Adler! (he/him) 3 years ago

Testicle size doesn’t matter to me, but I’m a boy 😔

0points

Dylan Mesamours 3 years ago

I WISH FOR MORE COMICS OF THESE!

0points

Just Curious 7 years ago

This is a version of an old joke.

0points

#40

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

135points

POST

Danny Boi 7 years ago

^Dad joke bonding

45points

Dylan Mesamours 3 years ago

im crying...

1point

Memymo68 4 years ago

Yes YES.....best ending ever

0points

inky Panda 4 years ago

yes

0points

William Wang 4 years ago

Aww cute

0points

Lillian Krupnik 5 years ago

Bro an add for nachos came on wen I was reading this ;-; I’m scared now

0points

wisdom evee 6 years ago

awww

0points

James Grey 7 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

#41

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

135points

POST

Roger Haywood 7 years ago

Is that genie related to me?

37points

Reynah Blair 6 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

wisdom evee 6 years ago

the face tho!!!

1point

Don Flynn 7 years ago

haha lol

1point

BOREDOM 3 years ago

that face

0points

Dylan Mesamours 3 years ago

yes

0points

Anh Tran 4 years ago

THAT face look at the end look halerious

0points

BusLady 7 years ago (edited)

Never mind...😵

0points

#42

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

134points

POST

Bobbob70 7 years ago

This is awesome, but it would have been cool if the baby was eating a tide pod

42points

Annija Cimermane 7 years ago

He's already drinking bleach

4points

meAgan 7 years ago

Is that bleach? God, I at least hoped it was alcohol. Nope. Bleach!

8points

bobdapotatooo 5 years ago

he won't be a father soon...

2points

James Grey 7 years ago

Oh f**k!

2points

the awesome Piplup 3 years ago

What is he was eating a tidepod sandwich and a glass of bleach

1point

UNEXPLAINABLE 5 years ago

Guys I think the kid is Donald trump. LOL

1point

Pumbaa 7 years ago

Look how cute little man #2 is drinking! <3

1point

BOREDOM 3 years ago

uummmm

0points

Dylan Mesamours 3 years ago

no!

0points

Liz Todoroni 4 years ago

…gen z in a nut shell…

0points

#43

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

134points

POST

Nadja Lambacher 7 years ago

awwww

56points

Caleb Harbison 4 years ago

I said the same thing LMAO

1point

Nikki D 7 years ago

Why IS it called a fly?

6points

ille102 7 years ago

Hahah my first thought was 'well that seems kinda obvious', but then I realized you're talking about the zipper..

2points

Somebody that is bored 7 years ago

Poor fly

2points

Gaige Taylor 4 years ago

grabs flyswatter

1point

CIAN MCHUGH 5 years ago

give him a little hug. and I mean very little.

1point

wisdom evee 6 years ago

d'awwwwwwww

1point

BusLady 7 years ago

poor little buddy knows he only has 28 days to live.

1point

Dylan Mesamours 3 years ago

im sad to you know...:(

0points

#44

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

133points

POST

Brandon Collinsworth 7 years ago

This seems like a game on Whose Line is it Anyway

73points

Captain Marvel 7 years ago

I love that show, bro!

8points

Desiré Yen 7 years ago

And the winner is..Ryan Styles, or Wayne Brady, or Colin Mochery😁

5points

Nikki D 7 years ago

This comment has been deleted.

2points

Liz Todoroni 4 years ago

YASSSS

1point

Foxyloxylou 7 years ago

superheros, to be exact

1point

Grumble O'Pug 7 years ago

Why am I laughing

7points

BusLady 7 years ago

Give him a break, man. unnamed-5b...5b0527.jpg

2points

pratik shukla 4 years ago

F**k it man! ....oh no..run!

1point

Ghazal Nayef Centralskolan 6B 5 years ago

lol omg hahahhahaha

1point

Khloe Ness 5 years ago

goodness

1point

seawing*nightwing 6 years ago

Why did this make me laugh so hard I dropped my phone into the sink?

1point

Reynah Blair 6 years ago

Dang they always curse so why smudge it out now

1point

Gavin Arbour 6 years ago

Wtf this is hilarious

1point

Lexie Brindle 7 years ago

I lost my s**t on this one!

1point

#45

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

131points

POST

Dian Ella Lillie 7 years ago

Heh, actually late to his own funeral! I think that's how I'd like to go...

71points

BusLady 7 years ago

The last time he'll be late.

4points

ThatJeremyKid 7 years ago

This is me to a tee... Exactly my future...

5points

Cora Woodcook 7 years ago

Better than early for the last one i guess

5points

Ashlee Rudolph 7 years ago

bahaha my life

4points

Dylan Mesamours 3 years ago

wait how?

0points

inky Panda 4 years ago

does anyone have fun plans for their funeral

0points

Archair 4 years ago

: My mom

0points

Rami Million 4 years ago

my grandpa did this but he is dead now

0points

Queen of hearts 5 years ago

i love the last one

0points

Alyse 7 years ago

at my funeral, I actually want them to bring me in late. Like 20 min at least.

0points

#46

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

130points

POST

Ladies and Gentlemen 7 years ago

Best!

53points

issam 7 years ago

He didn't see that coming !

9points

Full Name 7 years ago

He thought he'd be coming.

9points

guy greej 7 years ago

study

5points

Carmen Elena 7 years ago

her "anything" is not his "anything"... xD

4points

Bunny Sidhu 5 years ago

Femme fatale

3points

Jahnia Delgado 6 years ago

Where’s her skirt in the last panel... o-O

3points

BusLady 7 years ago

All those hours studying. and all I had to do was buy a gun...

3points

Somebody that is bored 7 years ago

The moral of this comic: Buy a gun and you can do anything you please.

3points

Rami Million 4 years ago

this is a normal day is my sons school

1point

Dylan Mesamours 3 years ago

oop

0points

#47

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

126points

POST

Hans 7 years ago

Astro-dad is a twat.

71points

BusLady 7 years ago

I hope he gets stranded on the Moon.

4points

James Grey 7 years ago

Alpha male a-hole dad. That poor kid has probably had an inferiority complex before he was born.

5points

Nikki D 7 years ago

Hahaha I wish more people used the word scrub.

2points

Henlo 7 years ago

You kind of people are the reason others don't use that word

1point

Horijoon Makna 5 years ago

sky is limit no being better than me

1point

Lindsey Rose 2 years ago

POOR KID HIS DAD IS A R****D

0points

Dylan Mesamours 3 years ago

no he is a b***h for saying that to his son

0points

William Wang 3 years ago

Asian parent be like (i'm chinese)

0points

Destiny nerd 7 years ago

I never got that phrase

0points

#48

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

126points

POST

JessyJoy 7 years ago

110...hefty amount of wine

59points

Tim Douglass 7 years ago

OK, I got 112, which is 16 bottle a day, which is definitely a bit of a drinking problem!

15points

King Kona 7 years ago

I got 122

6points

Nick P 7 years ago

It's 112 bottles. U made me count it.

4points

Manfred Leong 7 years ago

and you all have hefty amount of time. hahaha

4points

Kip The Otter 6 years ago

I got 112

3points

with a Y and a Z 7 years ago

this comment led us counting..your so good..lol..got 112

3points

Laetitia 7 years ago

I got 111...

2points

Erin Sheppard 7 years ago

I counted them all too.

2points

KENOBI 3 years ago

You counted that wow I’m impressed

1point

the awesome Piplup 3 years ago

*112

1point

Isla Moore 2 years ago

112

0points

the_boredest_of_pandas 2 years ago

imagine counting*definetly did not count*

0points

Alex The Fanperson 3 years ago

You counted that?

0points

Kimberly gibbler 5 years ago

89?

0points

Dylan Vite 5 years ago

This comment has been deleted.

0points

Bob Beltcher 7 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Emlyn 7 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Ladies and Gentlemen 7 years ago

For that much wine bottles in a week, its more then a problem!

5points

BusLady 7 years ago

🎶112 bottles of wine on the wall....🎶

2points

Cyd Charisse 7 years ago

I get 112. I also get that we’re all geeks :-D

2points

Kevin Billett 7 years ago

Anyone else feel like this could work as a legit installation in a museum? lol

2points

Genesis Harrison 7 years ago

Ikr.I took one look at it and I was like “Masterpiece”

0points

Emlyn 7 years ago

A week?

2points

RacconLifeGirlie 7 years ago

112 bottles in one week.

1point

Ms.Panda 7 years ago

I got 112;

1point

Roger Haywood 7 years ago

That's like 15 bottles a day!

1point

Nami Tantrum 7 years ago

maybe a little bit

1point

#49

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

123points

POST

Stephanie Kay 7 years ago

Love this one.. so sad but unflinchingly true for some people...

13points

BusLady 7 years ago

The explanation for self-destructive behaviour.

4points

Randy Zanuar 7 years ago

This should be higher......

3points

Khalid Otaibi 7 years ago

me likey likey

3points

Emlyn 7 years ago

same

3points

Another loser 5 years ago

Hugs

1point

Somebody that is bored 7 years ago

Ouch

1point

Dylan Mesamours 3 years ago

:(

0points

Henry Edison Jurman 4 years ago

Some F's in the chat for our sad boi

0points

Gaige Taylor 4 years ago

Same!

0points

Liz Todoroni 4 years ago

…me

0points

#50

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

120points

POST

Ashlee Rudolph 7 years ago

hahahaha

39points

Full Name 7 years ago

I've been a baaaad boy...

6points

Piku 7 years ago

Lol.. spank me sweetheart

3points

Ayan Granger 3 years ago

Took me a second...

0points

Dylan Mesamours 3 years ago

ayo you guys are pervs

0points

Memymo68 4 years ago

*makes him mop it up......hehehe🤣🤣🤣

0points

Ghazal Nayef Centralskolan 6B 5 years ago

but sad for the baby

0points

Ghazal Nayef Centralskolan 6B 5 years ago

lol

0points

Hendra Lim 7 years ago

ROFTL!

0points

Swetha Umashankar 7 years ago

Ha!

0points

#51

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

118points

POST

Grumble O'Pug 7 years ago

O.Henry is spinning in his grave.

39points

BusLady 7 years ago

One of my favourite authors.

2points

ADHORTATOR 7 years ago

That's sweet

7points

Piku 7 years ago

The gift of magi

6points

Christina Sersif 7 years ago

The short version of The gift of the magi

5points

James Grey 7 years ago

Awwwww

3points

LazyPanda 7 years ago

This remindes me of a disney christmas move I used to watch as a kid when minnie and mickey did a similar thing

3points

Xina Imad 7 years ago

it would be hysterical if the price points matched....pretty sure u dont need to part with a watch for a plastic comb

2points

Mary McConnell 7 years ago

I think in the original story, they were tortoise shell.

6points

inky Panda 4 years ago

i saw a mickey mouse Christmas special like this

0points

Sandra Amazing Star 2 years ago

SAME

0points

Whisper 4 years ago

I've read the original version of this story and this version is way better

0points

Jeremy Sandberg 4 years ago

there love is like counting stars

0points

#52

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

116points

POST

Person2638 7 years ago

Clever!

33points

Carmen Elena 7 years ago

good point

2points

Bree 4 years ago

Oh crap that’s dark…

1point

Siddharth Rath 7 years ago

Three in this case...

0points

#53

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

113points

POST

Hans 7 years ago

Bravo!

35points

Livia 7 years ago

LMAO You're bloody welcome

5points

John Everett 7 years ago

I'll be here all week!

3points

Swetha Umashankar 7 years ago

Cute

2points

#54

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

113points

POST

James Grey 7 years ago

😂😂😂😂😂

3points

Monika Rhodes 7 years ago

And it happened

1point

Nacho Cheese 5 years ago

Ah, so that's why... whoever did it is in for it.

0points

Paul Hutton 7 years ago

good, it's been f*****g me for 18 years

0points

Genesis Harrison 7 years ago

2018:Ba-by ShArk do dodo dododo baby shark dododod

0points

Christina Sersif 7 years ago

LOLOL

0points

#55

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

113points

POST

Roger Haywood 7 years ago

I love the headlines!

59points

Marie-Louise Chenois 7 years ago

Oh S**t Oh S**t Oh S**t

4points

Khloe Ness 5 years ago

haha yeah

1point

King Kona 7 years ago

Would you marry them....

1point

Emma Langowski 7 years ago

Oh S**t Oh S**t Oh S**t!

5points

Taryn Wallace 7 years ago

The f**k???

6points

Dark Pearl 4 years ago

2020/2021 in a nutshell

1point

Tristan Cotta 6 years ago

that is actually what the news looks like

1point

Dark Pearl 4 years ago

This comment has been deleted.

0points

Diddlybop 5 years ago

2020has been going a lot worse than 2019 be grateful dude. Wildfires, a life threating pandemic, massive protests...

0points

Well Hello There 7 years ago

The headlines tho "Oh S**t Oh S**t Oh S**t" "The F**k?" "AAAAAGGH!!!"

0points

moeless 7 years ago

How did the language blurring police miss the graph?

0points

BusLady 7 years ago

They only print the bad news.

-1point

#56

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

111points

POST

Grumble O'Pug 7 years ago

Lol!

25points

QueenSKYEE 7 years ago

Oh my gosh. Why *hand on forehead*

2points

BOREDOM 3 years ago

that is ligit my mum

0points

Foxyloxylou 7 years ago

You are judged Quilty by the Jewlery(jury)

0points

holo it's me 7 years ago

looks like it's moving around when you scroll

0points

Tristan Cotta 6 years ago

EWWWWWWW!

-1point

#57

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

110points

POST

Elina Kuusisto 7 years ago

Now they just need a duck

37points

Grumble O'Pug 7 years ago

A priest and a rabbi...where is the horse with the long face?

11points

Vlad Horobet 7 years ago

A jew, a priest and a bearded man walks into a bar and orders one drink...

6points

Just Curious 7 years ago

Um, wut?

4points

Panda Bae 6 years ago

I don't get it. Can someone explain?

1point

Reynah Blair 6 years ago

I don’t get it

0points

#58

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

106points

POST

Ladies and Gentlemen 7 years ago

I am not ready for this too!

26points

Aisha La Gatta Pelirroja 7 years ago

Me neither and I've got two kids. ;)

9points

BusLady 7 years ago

I think she's ready (to get this over with).

1point

Aria Gane 7 years ago

I'm pretty sure this is a tale as old as time.

0points

A Dyke From The Dreamworld 7 years ago

Y'all ready for this?

0points

Hans 7 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Logical Hue 7 years ago

It fits the general theme though: fear of babies.

5points

#59

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

102points

POST

Chris Lehr 7 years ago

The praying mantis wished for the locusts.

35points

KorKor 4 years ago

Prayed not woshed

0points

Nikki D 7 years ago

Zorak, is that you?

2points

Unnamed Hooman 4 years ago

Ourfatherwhoartinheavenhallowedbethynameyourkingdomcomeyourwillbedoneonearthasinheavengiveusthisdayourdailybreadandforgiveusoursinsasweforgivethosewhosinagainstusandleadusnotintotemptationbutdeliverusfromevilforthineisthekindgomthepowerandthegloryforeverandeveramen.

1point

William Wang 4 years ago

Clever

0points

wisdom evee 6 years ago

i breed mantises

0points

BusLady 7 years ago

Well, that's a different way of looking at it....

0points

Don Flynn 7 years ago

s**t in one and hope and pray into the other etc.

0points

Alex K 7 years ago (edited)

that's a praying mantis...it's a carnivore it wont hurt your crops

-2points

LunarEssence 7 years ago

The mantis prayed for the locusts to eat

4points

#60

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

101points

POST

Savant 7 years ago

it's a genetic thing

44points

BusLady 7 years ago

Word of advice to Mom: Run!!!!!

4points

Petra Christovová 7 years ago

Haha, I should laugh less at this.

3points

Somebody that is bored 7 years ago

Wow...

1point

Don Flynn 7 years ago

haha

1point

Khloe Ness 5 years ago

ha the mom on the last one

0points

KT Trondsen 7 years ago

LOL

0points

#61

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

101points

POST

Carmen Elena 7 years ago

the age of innocence!

23points

Hendra Lim 7 years ago

how come trying to make love dolls alive is innocence?

4points

BusLady 7 years ago

Been snooping around in Dad's closet again, eh?

2points

Neppy Nelly 7 years ago

It is number 69

1point

Jackson Red 4 years ago

me and my friends

0points

Khloe Ness 5 years ago

ewww

0points

I'm.in.wonderland 6 years ago

Is it weird I feel bad for the snowman?

0points

wisdom evee 6 years ago

2017 be like...

0points

Genesis Harrison 7 years ago

lol.🎵🎶Franncine the hoe-man🎵🐄

0points

Gerry Higgins 7 years ago

that one made me laugh.

0points

Don Flynn 7 years ago (edited)

lol

0points

#62

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

96points

POST

Hans 7 years ago

Best bud of Capt. Procrastination

39points

Grumble O'Pug 7 years ago

Lol

4points

Reynah Blair 6 years ago

Is anyone concerned about the fact that he just said he was going to MOVE HIS CATS

2points

Thunder 6 years ago

Ohh he was late XD

1point

LostGirl 1 year ago

This is what you see when you don't sleep for 48 hours

0points

Memymo68 4 years ago

Cousin of bad timing man

0points

Khloe Ness 5 years ago

LOVE IT!

0points

Foxyloxylou 7 years ago

move my cats?

0points

Sue Donim 7 years ago

move cats ? not feed ?

0points

diane a 7 years ago (edited)

Love the face - reminds me of an animal comic on here a while back - Buni

0points

#63

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

96points

POST

Sue Donim 7 years ago

he didnt say i wish to be perfectly clear !!!

37points

Carmen Elena 7 years ago

I think the genie is well aware of that... look at his face! "hahaha I did it again"

8points

Hendra Lim 7 years ago

and that's how invisible man was born

1point

#64

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

95points

POST

alink lien 7 years ago

xD

18points

Marie-Louise Chenois 7 years ago

I hope he's not gonna just rince it into water and put in back in his mouth...

5points

QueenSKYEE 7 years ago

*eyes widen* No comment

3points

Rebekah 7 years ago

Oh, my eyes!

3points

Tyler Mitchel 6 years ago

talk about a shity smile

1point

Michael Michlitsch 3 years ago

the human b******e can spread up to 7 inches. Racoons can fit in areas 3 inches wide i heard.

0points

William Wang 3 years ago

I am not going to sleep tonight

0points

Tyler Mitchel 6 years ago

talk about a shity smile

0points

wisdom evee 6 years ago

the smile tho!!! someone photoshop this into someones or somethings face!!!

0points

Slune 7 years ago

Some people have faces like this

0points

BusLady 7 years ago

Never seen a smiling butt before.

0points

#65

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

92points

POST

ThatJeremyKid 7 years ago

Thou shalt not divide by zero...

3points

BusLady 7 years ago

His brain is overheating.

0points

Hendra Lim 7 years ago

she just hate robobert

0points

Khloe Ness 5 years ago

its 5..

-1point

Christopher Aboah 4 years ago

The number is undefined since 5/1 is still 5 but when you go one down the whole equation becomes impossible.

0points

#66

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

90points

POST

Chris Weaver 2 years ago

And that, kids, is How I Met Your Mother.

4points

Lindsey Rose 3 years ago

Ikr I LOVE THEIR BUTTS

0points

#67

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

90points

POST

Huzaifa Khalid 7 years ago

Saying at No. 71

15points

Alyse 7 years ago

lol now it's 69

3points

Random Dog Owner 3 years ago (edited)

actually it is #67

0points

Joseph Rychetsky 5 years ago

67

0points

I stand with Ukraine 🇺🇦 3 years ago

It’s 67 officially because the final score is 90 points

1point

Khloe Ness 5 years ago

no. i will NOT help you.

1point

#68

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

87points

POST

Ladies and Gentlemen 7 years ago

I need a baby proof place as well!

21points

Novie Ana 7 years ago

I understand why people don't want to have kids of their own...but people who HATES kids? I mean why? we all were kids..

1point

Khloe Ness 5 years ago

away from the windows?

0points

BusLady 7 years ago

Oh, they can slip through those little gaps.

0points

#69

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

87points

POST

James Grey 7 years ago

Whoa!

20points

Amanda Ford 7 years ago

Call Cheesy Lawyer! 1-800-BAD-CHESE

1point

Lindsey Rose 3 years ago

Damnnnnn

0points

Liz Todoroni 4 years ago

Well when life goes wrong just treat it like a book, yell PLOT TWIST and get on with it, like come on dude, just walk it off

0points

#70

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

86points

POST

Night Owl 7 years ago

LMAO This one's good

35points

Ava Frampton 6 years ago

Lol that smile thoooo

1point

Kevin Billett 7 years ago

*badum tss*

1point

Henry Edison Jurman 4 years ago

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

0points

Khloe Ness 5 years ago

true XD-LOL

0points

Esther 6 years ago

My fav

0points

#71

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

85points

POST

Savant 7 years ago

he's a doctor, he'll be fine. The other one got ran over by a car!

42points

James Grey 7 years ago

😂😂😂😂

1point

Unnamed Hooman 4 years ago

I see a kraken-type thing

0points

Khloe Ness 5 years ago

if i shush will you not kill me? yeah. *quiet*

0points

BusLady 7 years ago

It's gonna look worse in a minute here.

0points

#72

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

82points

POST

Helen Cole 7 years ago

You and Pete Townsend.

18points

Random Dog Owner 3 years ago

lol i love the animations XD

1point

Anh Tran 4 years ago

imagine doing that as a job... GET COLD FOR 2$

0points

Khloe Ness 5 years ago

ha

0points

#73

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

81points

POST

Savant 7 years ago (edited)

Congrats! you've won one free breakup!

47points

Laugh Fan 7 years ago

Oh, they're never free.

11points

Khloe Ness 5 years ago

thats one long peice of spaggeti

0points

Rob Chapman 7 years ago

Yay!!! Particpation trophy!!!!

0points

Grumble O'Pug 7 years ago

And they say romance is dead

0points

#74

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

81points

POST

Ladies and Gentlemen 7 years ago

How, I mean how u can even think of such thing.

31points

troufaki13 7 years ago

I would have wished for the ring of infinite wishes :D

3points

Nikki D 7 years ago

Ooooooh, nice!

1point

incoherent screaming 7 years ago

Why is this so funny

1point

Khloe Ness 5 years ago

now u are a genie

0points

Genesis Harrison 7 years ago

His face tho

0points

Genesis Harrison 7 years ago

Yo,Mr.genie is mad!

0points

BusLady 7 years ago

Now they know how twins feel in the womb.

0points

#75

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

81points

POST

Emma Langowski 7 years ago

I want to do this.

27points

Cyd Charisse 7 years ago

Emma, we need to talk. —your trolling (ex) husband

5points

StealTheFruit 6 years ago

I know you wrote that six months ago, but are you okay?

2points

Emlyn 7 years ago

Same

2points

Jake 2 years ago

same here

0points

Jeremy Sandberg 4 years ago

me 2

0points

Khloe Ness 5 years ago

pffft

0points

#76

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

79points

POST

diane a 7 years ago

Strange sense of humor going on here - love it!

19points

Dawn Baik 7 years ago

OMG! LMAO!!!!!

2points

Aiden Duncan 6 years ago

they eat both things here in Peru

1point

ゾーイドレーガー 6 years ago

man my soul just changed to the black and until there is a darker color its not changing

1point

Whisper 4 years ago

Me too man, I don't care much about people but animals are the best

0points

LostGirl 1 year ago

noooooooo

0points

Whisper 4 years ago

NO HOW COULD YOU

0points

Khloe Ness 5 years ago

hmm

0points

Ms.Panda 7 years ago

I don't get it? Can someone explain

0points

Hendra Lim 7 years ago

he's buying the pet so that he can make a large guinea pig burger and some hamster nugget

2points

#77

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

78points

POST

Huzaifa Khalid 7 years ago

Ya geneaas...

9points

Khloe Ness 5 years ago

byeee imma leave now

0points

Phoenix Shadowhunter 6 years ago

Why is Kris' hat levitating above his head? Is he magical?!?

0points

#78

Cyanide-And-Happiness

Final score:

77points

POST

Savant 7 years ago (edited)

well that's one way to be famous

18points

BusLady 7 years ago

But you would never know.

3points

Dawn Fox 7 years ago

I laughed too hard at this one.

0points