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Raising children is hard. And even when you do your best, things don’t always turn out the way you hoped.
One dad went to Reddit to admit something he’s ashamed to say out loud: he isn’t proud of any of his five children. He says he poured everything he could into them, from education to hobbies, trying to help them grow into independent, ambitious adults. But in his eyes, none of them lived up to what he imagined, and now he blames himself, calling himself a failure as a father.
Read his confession below.
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The man went online to get a confession off his chest
Man sitting at wooden table with cup, looking troubled and reflecting on his children as failures in his eyes.
Oleksandra is an experienced copywriter from Ukraine with a master’s degree in International Communication. Having covered everything from education, finance, and marketing to art, pop culture, and memes, she now brings her storytelling skills to Bored Panda. For the past six years, she’s been living and working in Vilnius, Lithuania.
Oleksandra is an experienced copywriter from Ukraine with a master’s degree in International Communication. Having covered everything from education, finance, and marketing to art, pop culture, and memes, she now brings her storytelling skills to Bored Panda. For the past six years, she’s been living and working in Vilnius, Lithuania.
I am a Visual editor at Bored Panda, I'm determined to find the most interesting and the best quality images for each post that I do. On my free time I like to unwind by doing some yoga, watching all kinds of movies/tv shows, playing video and board games or just simply hanging out with my cat
I am a Visual editor at Bored Panda, I'm determined to find the most interesting and the best quality images for each post that I do. On my free time I like to unwind by doing some yoga, watching all kinds of movies/tv shows, playing video and board games or just simply hanging out with my cat
If there's no physical reason, it really does seem likely that there's a lot of trauma in the family, especially because there seems to be a time frame where the older kids went from outward looking to retreating. These all seem like classic trauma responses.
If five kids end up 'bad', then it's not the kids that are the problem. One, maybe... two is a coincidence... three is a pattern. Etc. Just because the kids don't fit OP's mold right now doesn't mean that they won't change later; they're all still relatively young. At least OP admits that he was part of the problem. I wonder if the kids have picked up on his 'vibe' in not being proud of them and that's influenced their actions somewhat (whether consciously or unconsciously).
I remember this case of a woman who was almost executed beause most of her babies died. There was rage and assumption that she was the one k*****g them. Some quack of a mathematican doctor was a witness saying that she 100% k****d them based on statistical analysis... Any mathematician worth their fking salt however would NEVER use statistics to prove CERTAINTY! Ah yes "Kathleen Folbigg" was her name...
The commenters by default blaming the dad must have the same low level IQ and inflated sense of ego as the ppl who added more ruin to Kathleen Folbigg 's life... Cus turns out her kids died of a rare genetic disorder...All they did was add more to that immeasurable pain she felt...
Reading this that is what I thought of. The father was clearly happy an proud of his middle kid that was having a normal life. Yet all these insane assumption were made...
The one comment saying it could be unknown Trauma inflicted on his kids without him and ex ever knowing. That could have merit. BUT THE DEFAULT assumption should be that it is entirely possible that one does everything correctly AND YET N number of kids, friends, family members and all sorts of loved ones, end up bad or in sad situations... N reaching to infinity btw... There is not a high enough number that would make the conclusion "op bad father and ex bad mother" a certainty based on THE NUMBER alone...
If there's no physical reason, it really does seem likely that there's a lot of trauma in the family, especially because there seems to be a time frame where the older kids went from outward looking to retreating. These all seem like classic trauma responses.
If five kids end up 'bad', then it's not the kids that are the problem. One, maybe... two is a coincidence... three is a pattern. Etc. Just because the kids don't fit OP's mold right now doesn't mean that they won't change later; they're all still relatively young. At least OP admits that he was part of the problem. I wonder if the kids have picked up on his 'vibe' in not being proud of them and that's influenced their actions somewhat (whether consciously or unconsciously).
I remember this case of a woman who was almost executed beause most of her babies died. There was rage and assumption that she was the one k*****g them. Some quack of a mathematican doctor was a witness saying that she 100% k****d them based on statistical analysis... Any mathematician worth their fking salt however would NEVER use statistics to prove CERTAINTY! Ah yes "Kathleen Folbigg" was her name...
The commenters by default blaming the dad must have the same low level IQ and inflated sense of ego as the ppl who added more ruin to Kathleen Folbigg 's life... Cus turns out her kids died of a rare genetic disorder...All they did was add more to that immeasurable pain she felt...
Reading this that is what I thought of. The father was clearly happy an proud of his middle kid that was having a normal life. Yet all these insane assumption were made...
The one comment saying it could be unknown Trauma inflicted on his kids without him and ex ever knowing. That could have merit. BUT THE DEFAULT assumption should be that it is entirely possible that one does everything correctly AND YET N number of kids, friends, family members and all sorts of loved ones, end up bad or in sad situations... N reaching to infinity btw... There is not a high enough number that would make the conclusion "op bad father and ex bad mother" a certainty based on THE NUMBER alone...
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