“It Would End Soon”: Woman Cancels Wedding After Learning About Fiancé’s Family’s ‘Tradition’

Not all family traditions are created equal. While some of them might be wholesome and uniting, others are so weird and invasive that you wonder why anyone would continue doing them. Some odd wedding traditions violate the newlyweds’ privacy and should, frankly, be left behind in the past.

A bride-to-be, who was considering canceling her own wedding, asked the internet for help. She said that she’s having second thoughts after she found out that her fiancé’s family has a ‘bedding’ ceremony, which freaked her out. You’ll find her story, update, and the internet’s responses below.

It’s okay to have family traditions, as long as they carry meaning, pass down values, and build identity

Bride and groom exchanging rings indoors as woman cancels wedding due to fiancé’s family tradition concerns

Image credits: Emma Bauso (not the actual photo)

However, when a tradition is quite literally watching someone be intimate, then it’s problematic

Woman cancels wedding after learning fiancé’s family tradition of a public bedding ceremony causes concern.

Alt text: Woman cancels wedding after discovering fiancé’s family tradition, sharing her story about ending the engagement soon.

Woman feels unsafe and considers canceling wedding after learning about fiancé’s family tradition she finds uncomfortable.

Text post asking for opinions about a wedding issue involving fiancé’s family tradition before the wedding.

Woman cancels wedding, pushing fiancé away after learning about his family's unusual tradition at home.

Image credits: LightFieldStudios (not the actual photo)

Woman cancels wedding after learning about fiancé family tradition, expressing gratitude for support during difficult situation.

Woman cancels wedding after learning about fiancé's family tradition, expressing concerns about humiliation by in-laws.

Text message from woman explaining she canceled wedding after learning about fiancé’s family tradition and will provide updates.

Image credits: Choice_Evidence1983

Woman sitting curled up on a chair, looking distressed after learning about fiancé’s family tradition ending wedding plans.

Image credits: Liza Summer (not the actual photo)

It is not to say family traditions are all bad, as there are benefits to them, but they have to make sense, and can’t be forced

Family traditions are activities, gifts, stories or songs that are continued through a family’s life together and passed down from generation to generation.

For a tradition to be considered a tradition, it has to have several defining characteristics. Traditions have to be meaningful exercises that are aimed at fostering a connection to loved ones and providing a sense of unity and stability.

Forcing someone into a tradition—whether they don’t want to or their beliefs are different—is not in the true spirit of what it means to uphold a tradition. By proxy, coercion goes against the definition of tradition. It’s also an indicator that traditions need to be adapted or changed altogether so that togetherness can continue without making someone awkward, grossed out or otherwise uncomfortable.

For context, yes, bedding is definitely a legit custom, in the sense that it exists. However, it goes against the idea of togetherness because it’s forced.

What are your thoughts on all of this? Where do you draw the line when it comes to family traditions? How do you protect your boundaries from your partner’s family? What are some relationship red and green flags that you keep an eye out for? What, from your perspective, is the secret to a truly happy and healthy marriage? Share your takes in the comment section below.

Needless to say, commenters were grossly weirded out by this and ruled that the woman is not in the wrong

Screenshot of a Reddit conversation about a woman canceling wedding due to fiancé’s family tradition causing conflict.

Screenshot of a Reddit conversation where a woman cancels wedding after learning about fiancé’s family tradition.

Screenshot of a conversation about a woman canceling her wedding after learning about her fiancé’s family tradition from Scotland.

Text conversation about European history and bedding ceremony tradition linked to a woman canceling wedding over fiancé’s family tradition.

Roughly 2 months later, the author of the original post provided an update confirming that the fiancé is now an ex

Woman cancels wedding after learning about fiancé’s family tradition involving inappropriate behavior during bedding.

Text post explaining a woman cancels wedding after learning about fiancé’s family tradition, sharing personal update.

Image credits: Choice_Evidence1983

Woman holding a wedding ring and canceling wedding after learning about fiancé’s family tradition, sitting on a couch.

Image credits: cottonbro studio (not the actual photo)

Folks online were still grossed out, siding with the woman and sharing their takes on the matter

Comments discussing a woman canceling wedding after learning about fiancé’s family tradition of arranged marriages.

Screenshot of a Reddit comment discussing a woman canceling her wedding after learning about fiancé’s family tradition.

Screenshot of a Reddit comment stating Scottish culture is not related to the fiancé’s family tradition in wedding cancellation discussion.

Screenshot of a social media comment discussing a controversial wedding tradition involving the bride's virginity and family customs.

Screenshot of a social media comment reacting to a wedding cancellation after learning about fiancé’s family tradition.

Comment discussing a woman who cancels wedding after learning about fiancé’s family tradition involving new brides.

Comment about woman canceling wedding after learning about fiancé’s family tradition, expressing disbelief and confusion.

Woman cancels wedding after learning about fiancé’s family tradition, feeling shocked and conflicted about the situation.

Woman cancels wedding after discovering fiancé’s family tradition causes conflict and ends relationship abruptly.

Screenshot of a social media comment discussing a woman who cancels wedding after learning about fiancé’s family tradition.

Reddit comment expressing concern after a woman cancels wedding due to fiancé’s family tradition revealed.

Comment on a forum post about a woman canceling her wedding after learning about fiancé’s family tradition.

Woman looks upset holding her phone, canceling wedding after discovering fiancé’s family tradition causing conflict.

Screenshot of online comment discussing wedding traditions and unexpected family practices before a canceled wedding.

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