“It’s Not My Problem Anymore”: Guy Faces Hard Breakup With GF Of 4 Years, Goes To Therapy To Heal

Some character in a historical movie from the last century sarcastically, though quite reasonably, noted that in this world you can’t trust anyone. Even yourself – from time to time. Well, decades have passed since then, and the world, judging by people’s relationships, has changed in many ways, far from the better. Anyone can betray and stab you in the back – even someone you don’t expect it from.

This is how the author of our story today, the user u/brokenhearted118, one day faced not only real betrayal from one of the closest people to him, but what actually became the hardest blow in his life. However, let’s talk about everything in more detail.

More info: Reddit

The author of the post moved to another city to follow his girlfriend of 4 years over her incredible job offer

Wedding invitation card on a table symbolizing love and commitment in an ex-fiance Valentine day apartment setting.

Image credits: micheile henderson / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

He literally left his friends, family and his job to follow her career prospects

Text excerpt about an ex-fiance planning to use their shared apartment for a Valentine’s Day date.

Alt text: Woman reflecting in a new apartment after moving for fiancé’s job in a fresh start post-ex relationship Valentine Day.

Text excerpt from an ex-fiance about feeling uneasy on Valentine’s Day in their shared apartment.

Text excerpt about breakup and strong bond with coworker, related to ex fiance Valentine Day apartment story.

Image credits: brokenhearted118

Man and woman having a tense conversation in an apartment on Valentine’s Day after breakup with ex-fiance.

Image credits: Vitaly Gariev / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

However, she ran into a male colleague at the new job, and one day simply told the author they needed to break up

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Text excerpt describing financial struggles and conflict after moving, relating to ex-fiance Valentine Day apartment situation.

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Image credits: brokenhearted118

Couple having a tense conversation in a modern apartment, capturing ex-fiance tension on Valentine Day.

Image credits: Alex Green / Pexels (not the actual photo)

Moreover, she demanded he get out of their apartment because of her new date coming over for Valentine’s Day

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Text message describing a fiancé dumping narrator and demanding an apartment for a Valentine day date.

Text excerpt from ex-fiance Valentine Day apartment dispute showing standing ground and apartment threats discussion.

Image credits: brokenhearted118

Young man in a plaid shirt looking out a window inside an apartment reflecting on ex fiancé during Valentine’s Day.

Image credits: Aleksandar Andreev / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

Turns out, she wanted to spend time on Valentine’s Day with her new boyfriend

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Text on a white background reading a heartfelt thank you message about suggestions and overwhelming comments during a difficult time in life.

Person reflecting alone in an apartment on Valentine’s Day after breakup with ex-fiance, feeling embarrassed and thoughtful.

Image credits: brokenhearted118

Young man in a dark shirt resting head on arm, looking sad inside an apartment on Valentine’s Day after breakup with ex-fiance

Image credits: Eman Genatilan / Pexels (not the actual photo)

The man had a desperate plan to win her back – but everything went awry

Man reflecting on healing after breakup with ex-fiance, spending Valentine’s Day alone in apartment improving himself.

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Text about ex-fiance dealing with a close relative's passing shortly after getting engaged before Valentine Day apartment discussions.

Image credits: brokenhearted118

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Image credits: Olga Kononenko / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

He had recently found her late relative’s lost charm – and decided to hand it back to her in order to cause some of her warmest memories

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Text snippet about packing an apartment and keeping a charm to surprise ex-fiance on Valentine’s Day in new apartment.

Text from ex-fiance Valentine Day apartment story about trying to reconnect by showing charm on Valentine’s Day.

Alt text: Person reflecting on unexpected situation in ex-fiance Valentine Day apartment and failed plan to win her back.

Text excerpt about an ex-fiance experience on Valentine’s Day in an apartment, describing awkward and tense emotions.

Image credits: brokenhearted118

Hand holding a delicate gold necklace pendant reflecting emotions in an ex fiance Valentine day apartment setting.

Image credits: Kaboompics.com / Pexels (not the actual photo)

But the woman showed up with that guy, then accused him of stealing the charm – and kicked him out

Person describing a personal low point after a breakup, walking all night and falling asleep in the apartment hallway.

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Text message expressing gratitude to Reddit users for support after ex-fiance Valentine Day apartment situation.

Image credits: brokenhearted118

Frustrated ex fiance standing with arms crossed while Valentine day argument unfolds in apartment.

Image credits: Timur Weber / Pexels (not the actual photo)

So the man ended up returning to his hometown and his former job, and started therapy to heal his wounds

The Original Poster (OP) faced this life test at the age of 26, when his fiancée, a year younger, literally uprooted him from their hometown for an incredible job offer across the country. They had been together for 4 years, were planning a wedding – and our hero happily followed her, even though he had to quit his job.

It would seem, what could go wrong? As it turns out, a lot – at the new workplace, the woman found an incredible bond with a colleague, and one fine day she confronted her boyfriend with the fact – they were breaking up. For him, this was a colossal blow, but the woman dealt him another one – Valentine’s Day was approaching, and she demanded that he get out of their apartment.

The thing is, the woman was planning to invite her new date there. A huge fight followed, and our hero, despite the fact that he had nowhere to go in a strange city, was forced to give in. However, as he admitted in an update published a year later – he had a plan to win her back. Looking ahead – the plan was completely unsuccessful.

Shortly before the move, one of the woman’s relatives passed away, and then she lost a charm that this relative had given her many years ago. She was incredibly upset – but literally a couple of days later, the OP found that charm. And so, he decided to return it to her on Valentine’s Day – apparently hoping that this would awaken some nostalgic memories in her…

Of course, everything went awry. She showed up with her new BF, and when the author handed her the lost item, she simply accused him of stealing it, after which they both simply kicked him out. After a night spent on the street, our hero gave in and returned to his hometown. Luckily, he was able to coax his boss to take him back, and after a long course of therapy, he gradually began to heal his soul… But that, as they say, is just another story.

Person with a red backpack hiking on a grassy mountain trail, reflecting on memories of an ex-fiance Valentine Day.

Image credits: Jonas Allert / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

Well, it looks like the original poster made several serious mistakes here – he overestimated his girlfriend’s feelings towards him, and expected that the returned charm would awaken some tender feelings for him again. But subsequent events actually showed that he was dramatically wrong about literally everything…

“If after four years of a relationship a woman is ready to leave her partner in quite a short time – it means that she most likely didn’t regard the relationship as something serious,” says Irina Matveeva, a psychologist and certified NLP specialist, whom Bored Panda asked for a comment here. “So it’s not surprising that his plan didn’t work.”

“Perhaps she considered that the boyfriend would be a burden for her in the new place, perhaps she really got too carried away with another man – in fact, there can be a huge number of reasons for this, and it will not be possible to get into this woman’s head. The main thing is that this man sooner or later made the right conclusions for himself.”

“Coming back home, reestablishing broken social ties, trying to heal the wounds with friendship, therapy and probably new relationships – this is in fact the only right way in such situations. I sincerely hope that everything worked out well for him,” Irina summarizes.

By the way, people in the comments also supported the author, expressing not only indignation at the actions of his ex-fiancée, but even offering to send him some money for the ticket to his hometown. It’s so nice to realize that ordinary human kindness still remains in our harsh and sometimes ruthless world – isn’t that true, our dear readers?

People in the comments backed the man sincerely, and some folks even offered to give him money for a ticket home

Reddit conversation about ex-fiance refusing to move from apartment on Valentine’s Day, causing conflict.

Online discussion suggesting a trade involving the ex-fiance and Valentine Day apartment arrangement.

Conversation about handling an ex-fiance on Valentine’s Day in an apartment setting, discussing relationship boundaries.

Conversation about ex fiance and lease issues in a Valentine Day apartment, discussing standing ground and credit concerns.

Comment suggesting to leave an ex-fiance's apartment, then surprise their Valentine’s Day date by emerging naked from a closet.

Comment text on a white background discussing advice related to an ex-fiance and Valentine Day apartment situation.

Online comment suggesting to tell an ex-fiance to pay for a ticket home to end the relationship for good on Valentine’s Day in an apartment.

Comment from user xxCLJ advising to stand your ground about an ex-fiance Valentine's Day apartment discussion.

Alt text: Anonymous comment about being a date in NYC causing a super uncomfortable ex fiancé Valentine Day apartment situation.

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