Get Premium
Dark mode theme is available exclusively for premium users. Learn more about the benefits of subscribing.
No fees, cancel anytime.
Dark Mode 
No fees, cancel anytime 
then open in external browser
and click "Open in External Browser" 
Woman Rebuilds Life After Friend Group Split, Shuts Ex’s Pal When He Tries Using Her For A Job
The hard thing about divorces isn’t just dividing assets, it’s that it often comes with the unexpected side effect of losing mutual friends faster than socks in a dryer. And sometimes, just sometimes, those lost connections resurface years later with the kind of audacity that could power a small city.
Today’s story is the plot twist no one saw coming. Today’s Original Poster (OP) survived a tough divorce, handled it with class, and rebuilt her life, only to have one of her ex-husband’s friends pull a power move so bold it deserves its own sitcom. If you’ve ever wondered whether the universe runs on pettiness and poetic justice, just buckle up.
More info: Reddit
RELATED:
Life teaches us to bear hurt with grace, but reclaiming respect through justified means is never petty, sometimes it’s just necessary
Image credits: cottonbro studio / Pexels (not the actual photo)
After a difficult divorce, the author was gradually ghosted by mutual friends, most of whom sided with her ex
Image credits: Commercial-Dish7684
Image credits: katemangostar / Freepik (not the actual photo)
One of those friends completely ignored her at an event, signaling their loyalty shift loud and clear
Image credits: Commercial-Dish7684
Image credits: zinkevych / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Years later, that same person emailed her at work, casually asking for a job referral without apology or acknowledgment of the past
Image credits: Commercial-Dish7684
She immediately contacted HR to clarify she wouldn’t endorse him, ensuring his application went nowhere
Over a decade ago, the OP went through a difficult divorce that didn’t just end a marriage, but also took a sledgehammer to her social life. As often happens in long-term relationships, mutual friends chose sides. While it stung, she understood and moved on, making peace with the social fallout, and focused on building a new life.
Before finalizing the divorce, she attended one last event at her ex’s invitation, where he had generously reserved a VIP experience for her. At the VIP lounge, she bumped into one of her ex’s longtime friends, a man she once hosted for game nights and helped by pet sitting. She greeted him, but he walked around her like she was invisible.
Fast forward a few years. The OP is in a new marriage and doing well at work. Then out of the blue, she received an email at work from the same guy who couldn’t be bothered to acknowledge her existence at that event. His email began with small talk but quickly revealed that he had applied for a job at her company, and listed her as a referral.
The OP initially ignored the message, but as the absurdity of it sank in, she made a move. She called HR and let them know she wouldn’t ever refer him. Then, she shared the story with one of the partners in the department he had applied to, and they both had a good laugh over the audacity.
Image credits: Anastasia Shuraeva / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Creative Core Counseling acknowledge that when a breakup occurs, friends often feel pressured to take sides or create distance to avoid being caught in the middle. They also explain that emotional exhaustion can make it difficult for them to offer support during such times as friendships tend to lean toward the person with whom they share a longer or stronger bond.
However, Time suggests that it is possible to maintain networks even with a little level of rapport. Just like what happened in the story, they highlight that mistreating past friends can erode trust and lead to lost opportunities for collaboration, mentorship, and even career growth.
As BetterHelp explains, a sense of entitlement often shows up as an inflated belief that one deserves benefits or recognition without having earned them. In the context of this story, the friend who ignored the OP during her divorce but later asked her for a professional favor fits this pattern.
Despite severing ties and offering no apology or effort to rebuild the relationship, he assumed she would vouch for him, purely for his benefit. BetterHelp affirms that his behavior reflects a belief that he was still owed support, even after offering none in return, highlighting how entitlement can damage both personal and professional relationships.
Netizens found the OP’s reaction both satisfying and justified, considering she was abandoned and ghosted during a breakup, only to be contacted later for personal gain.
What would you do if you were in the OP’s shoes? Would you ever recommend someone for a job after they completely ghosted you during a tough time? We would love to know your thoughts!
Netizens applauded the author for her response, highlighting that the friend only reached out for his own personal gain
Poll Question
Total votes ·
Thanks! Check out the results:
Total votes ·
Newsletter
Subscribe to Access
Exclusive Polls
By entering your email and clicking Subscribe, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. You are also agreeing to our Privacy Policy.
Thank you! You've successfully subscribed to newsletters!
Explore more of these tags
What do you think ?
Apatheist Account2 5 months ago
One should never use someone as a reference without asking, that's pretty basic stuff. I suppose with 8 billion on the planet, some had to be at the back of the queue when politeness and brains were being handed out.
Michael Largey 5 months ago
I once worked for a terrible principal who applied for a job at a bigger high school in another school district. I thought "Great! We're rid of him." until he asked me as teachers' union president to write him a letter of recommendation. It was a dilemna. Do I screw over my fellow teachers by writing a bad recommendation that kept him with us or screw over a bunch of other teachers at the new school by lying and dumping him on them? So I wrote a very carefully phrased letter, one I knew he was too dumb and conceited to decipher. He sent it in, and after about a week I got a phone call from a teacher on that school's search committee. She said, "OK, we got your letter and read between the lines." We talked for quite a while. They still hired him, but I got regular calls from his new staff about how to handle the b******t he tried to pull off. It was the same bs as before, so the calls were easy to answer.
JayWantsACat 5 months ago
And this is why you don't burn bridges unless you absolutely mean to. I get choosing sides in a divorce but it literally takes nothing to be polite and amicable to every one involved. Obviously not talking about a*****e situations and whatnot.
KatSaidWhat 5 months ago
Lol, this is like the guy I used to work with 20+ years ago who suddenly got in touch and wanted to go for dinner, drinks etc. The guy stalked me and phoned me on my work phone... after some back and forth it transpired he was hoping my bosses would just blindly sign some legal documents for his wife... nope. And now he has gone quiet again.
Jill Waters 5 months ago
I worked two jobs to survive being on my own. My now husbands family decided I was an alcoholic as I worked behind the bar in a pub. I didn’t have the money to be an alcoholic! My other job was working full time for the nhs another reason alcohol was not on the agenda!!! Then my husbands nephew approached me to get his girlfriend a job. It’s funny how they were nice to me when they wanted something from me. No I didn’t give her a job.
Sarah Belt 5 months ago (edited)
I had an ex-coworker do this to me. He was fired for drinking on the job. I saw him later at an industry event and he pretended I didn't exist when I said hello. Later, I discovered that he put me down as a reference while claiming a higher title than he had had. When a recruiter called, I was able to correct the title & state our company would not rehire him (about all you can legally say). When ANOTHER recruiter called, the same. I'm still baffled as to why he used me as a reference. But if you're a recruiter, please check references. It's worth the 2 minutes.
Apatheist Account2 5 months ago
One should never use someone as a reference without asking, that's pretty basic stuff. I suppose with 8 billion on the planet, some had to be at the back of the queue when politeness and brains were being handed out.
Michael Largey 5 months ago
I once worked for a terrible principal who applied for a job at a bigger high school in another school district. I thought "Great! We're rid of him." until he asked me as teachers' union president to write him a letter of recommendation. It was a dilemna. Do I screw over my fellow teachers by writing a bad recommendation that kept him with us or screw over a bunch of other teachers at the new school by lying and dumping him on them? So I wrote a very carefully phrased letter, one I knew he was too dumb and conceited to decipher. He sent it in, and after about a week I got a phone call from a teacher on that school's search committee. She said, "OK, we got your letter and read between the lines." We talked for quite a while. They still hired him, but I got regular calls from his new staff about how to handle the b******t he tried to pull off. It was the same bs as before, so the calls were easy to answer.
JayWantsACat 5 months ago
And this is why you don't burn bridges unless you absolutely mean to. I get choosing sides in a divorce but it literally takes nothing to be polite and amicable to every one involved. Obviously not talking about a*****e situations and whatnot.
KatSaidWhat 5 months ago
Lol, this is like the guy I used to work with 20+ years ago who suddenly got in touch and wanted to go for dinner, drinks etc. The guy stalked me and phoned me on my work phone... after some back and forth it transpired he was hoping my bosses would just blindly sign some legal documents for his wife... nope. And now he has gone quiet again.
Jill Waters 5 months ago
I worked two jobs to survive being on my own. My now husbands family decided I was an alcoholic as I worked behind the bar in a pub. I didn’t have the money to be an alcoholic! My other job was working full time for the nhs another reason alcohol was not on the agenda!!! Then my husbands nephew approached me to get his girlfriend a job. It’s funny how they were nice to me when they wanted something from me. No I didn’t give her a job.
Sarah Belt 5 months ago (edited)
I had an ex-coworker do this to me. He was fired for drinking on the job. I saw him later at an industry event and he pretended I didn't exist when I said hello. Later, I discovered that he put me down as a reference while claiming a higher title than he had had. When a recruiter called, I was able to correct the title & state our company would not rehire him (about all you can legally say). When ANOTHER recruiter called, the same. I'm still baffled as to why he used me as a reference. But if you're a recruiter, please check references. It's worth the 2 minutes.
You May Like Gatecrashing Woman Makes A Scene At A Private Party Over “A Sandwich” For Her Children Man Catches Wife Cheating, Delighted As Her BF's Confession Saves Him $25K Divorce Payout Guy Cheats On Wife, Watches Her Live Her Best Life While He Complains About How He Ruined His
Indrė Lukošiūtė
Rūta Zumbrickaitė
Gabija Palšytė
Related on Bored Panda
45
8