Get Premium
Dark mode theme is available exclusively for premium users. Learn more about the benefits of subscribing.
No fees, cancel anytime.
Dark Mode 
No fees, cancel anytime 
then open in external browser
and click "Open in External Browser" 
Woman Lets Daughter “Tag Along” On Friend’s International Trip, Gets Hit With Huge Bill Soon After
Right now, I want to address the parents; imagine that your teen child is invited by a friend to go with them on their family trip. Can you imagine it, right? And now tell me, who, in your opinion, should pay for all the expenses for the kid? You or their friend’s parents? The question is actually debatable, and everyone has their own answer.
For the user u/ipraydaily, the author of today’s story, everything was actually clear —if she invites her daughter’s friends to any activities, she usually pays for them herself. Therefore, when sending her daughter on another trip, she didn’t even discuss this question with other parents. As it turns out, in vain…
More info: Reddit
RELATED:
The author of the post is a mom of a 16YO daughter, and the girl was recently invited by her friend to their vacay in Costa Rica
Image credits: wirestock / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The author usually pays for invited kids in such cases, so she took it for granted here as well
Image credits: ipraydaily
Image credits: lookstudio / Freepik (not the actual photo)
However, shortly after the daughter returned from the journey, the mom received a hefty bill from the friend’s parents
Image credits: ipraydaily
The bill was $2,8K and included accommodation, food, and even excursion tickets
So, the Original Poster (OP) is a mom herself, and when her 16-year-old daughter was recently invited by a friend on their family trip to Costa Rica, our heroine was almost convinced that the hosts would pay for all or just some of her daughter’s expenses. At least, that’s what she did recently for her other daughter’s friend.
And now imagine our heroine’s surprise when, some time after her daughter returned from her trip (they had a great time, everyone was more than happy), she received a huge bill by email from that friend’s parents!
This bill included a portion of the payment for literally everything. A bill for a whole $2,800 – $1,200 for accommodation, $400 for food, and the rest for the excursions. It’s not that the author didn’t have this money – no, she says she can pay, and it won’t hit her family budget too hard – but she was simply baffled to receive this bill.
However, upon reflection, our heroine realized that she had simply taken wishful thinking for reality, deciding that if her family did things this way or that, then other people “should” act the same way. Be that as it may, the OP goes on, it makes sense to discuss the costs splitting with another parents beforehand.
Image credits: Freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
“Yes, in this situation, we are faced with a classic case when people are convinced that their point of view and life experience are absolutely inherent to all other people,” says Irina Matveeva, a psychologist and certified NLP specialist, whom Bored Panda asked for a comment here. “Usually, when faced with reality, such people are very surprised.”
“The parents of the other girl, apparently, were also absolutely convinced that their own families should pay for everything for the invited children – so there is a typical miscommunication. As we can see, the reality check turned out to be quite painful for both families…”
“In any case, people shouldn’t take anything for granted and always discuss even the smallest details when planning interactions with others. A rule well known to the authors of various instructions – after all, they usually include even points that seem completely obvious and weird to many readers. But almost all of us should actually take this rule into service,” Irina summarizes.
People in the comments to the original post also reasonably noted that the situation was damn unpleasant and rather strange – and that inviting other people on a trip just to save on expenses is not the most adequate solution. In any case, the responders are almost certain that there was a banal misunderstanding here.
Be that as it may, the commenters are sure that this situation should become an excellent life lesson for this woman in the future. “What was going to be owed 100% should have been discussed before the trip. Remember for next time to make sure before assuming. For now, I’d just pay it,” someone wrote quite wisely. And what do you, our dear readers, think about this case as well?
People in the comments bashed the hosts for this decision, but assumed that the author actually had to discuss this question beforehand
Image credits: katemangostar / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Poll Question
Total votes ·
Thanks! Check out the results:
Total votes ·
Newsletter
Subscribe to Access
Exclusive Polls
By entering your email and clicking Subscribe, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. You are also agreeing to our Privacy Policy.
Thank you! You've successfully subscribed to newsletters!
Explore more of these tags
What do you think ?
Apatheist Account2 10 months ago
I'm guessing Costa Rico is either a coffee shop, or the male version of Costa Rica.
Upstaged75 10 months ago (edited)
When I was a kid I had friends come on vacation with my family and have gone on vacation with friend's families. My family always paid everything for the friend that was with us and vice versa.
Nils Skirnir 10 months ago
Yeah but I’d never send my kid to a foreign country w/another family w/o money/credit card and clearing up payments first.
Load More Replies...
Carilyn Beverly 10 months ago
I'm an American who grew up in Germany. In the mid 90's, my mother and I brought my German best friend with us to the US (California) for summer break. My mom and I came to visit family every 2-3 years. My friend and I were in our early (barely) teens. Despite the language barriers our parents had (my mom spoke little German and her parents spoke little English LOL) we still properly communicated what expenses we would cover and what expenses they would cover, plus what she would take as her own spending money. Years later, for our graduation, her parents arranged for us to go to Euro Disney (just us 2 girls); again, with limited common language, her parents explained what they had already covered (as a gift) and what would still be needed. I could not understand such a trip without prior discussions of finances. It's not rude, it's essential! And yes, my friend and I did A LOT of the translating during those conversations :)
tori Ohno 10 months ago
If you invite someone on your vacation, you discuss how much you expect to be reimbursed, these people didn't. But, the invitee's mother should have asked. The vacationing family is the one I feel is actually in the wrong here, since inviting her shouldn't have cost any extra except for food. Lodging should have been the same since the girls could share a room. I think it turned out more expensive than originally planned, and they pulled a bait and switch on OP to recoup some of the money. I don't trust people like them.
Fellfromthemoon 10 months ago (edited)
My guess is that the host family recognized only upon arrival that because of the guest they needed to upgrade the accommodation and rental car (one more room, one more car.) Edit: it's possible that the last addition to the group was not OP's daughter, but she's not family, hence she got charged.
Happy_Pandalover 10 months ago (edited)
If you invite someone, it means you cover their expenses. If you ask them to join, that‘s another thing. Now, did the other family really invite her daughter or did they only ask her to join? IMO either way i think with a big trip like this, you need to discuss the circumstances. Both parties failed here in my opion. She should have asked what their expectations are and they should have informed her about the costs beforehand. When i was younger i had a family invite me to their trips quite often. Usually it would be them driving by car and renting a house. They would provide my food and activities as Well. On the other hand my family would do the same for their daughters. We went to a more expensive vacation with flights and 5 star hotel once, so this one time they asked me to pay for my own flight/ hotel room and would treat me for dinner/activities there. It‘s just a matter of communication - beforehand of course.
ZestyBison 10 months ago
This is something that 100% needs to be discussed and settled prior to the acceptance of a trip. I would also recommend sending your child with some of their own money to address any emergencies or little forgotten things.
Andrea Steinacher 10 months ago
Well, there´s a difference between "invited" and "may come along", as my great--aunt made clear decades before I was born. She told my grandma that my mother is invited (= everything will be paid by auntie), my uncle may come (= not a penny would be spent on him by auntie) - she somehow didn´t like mum´s little brother
Apatheist Account2 10 months ago
I'm guessing Costa Rico is either a coffee shop, or the male version of Costa Rica.
Upstaged75 10 months ago (edited)
When I was a kid I had friends come on vacation with my family and have gone on vacation with friend's families. My family always paid everything for the friend that was with us and vice versa.
Nils Skirnir 10 months ago
Yeah but I’d never send my kid to a foreign country w/another family w/o money/credit card and clearing up payments first.
Load More Replies... Carilyn Beverly 10 months ago
I'm an American who grew up in Germany. In the mid 90's, my mother and I brought my German best friend with us to the US (California) for summer break. My mom and I came to visit family every 2-3 years. My friend and I were in our early (barely) teens. Despite the language barriers our parents had (my mom spoke little German and her parents spoke little English LOL) we still properly communicated what expenses we would cover and what expenses they would cover, plus what she would take as her own spending money. Years later, for our graduation, her parents arranged for us to go to Euro Disney (just us 2 girls); again, with limited common language, her parents explained what they had already covered (as a gift) and what would still be needed. I could not understand such a trip without prior discussions of finances. It's not rude, it's essential! And yes, my friend and I did A LOT of the translating during those conversations :)
tori Ohno 10 months ago
If you invite someone on your vacation, you discuss how much you expect to be reimbursed, these people didn't. But, the invitee's mother should have asked. The vacationing family is the one I feel is actually in the wrong here, since inviting her shouldn't have cost any extra except for food. Lodging should have been the same since the girls could share a room. I think it turned out more expensive than originally planned, and they pulled a bait and switch on OP to recoup some of the money. I don't trust people like them.
Fellfromthemoon 10 months ago (edited)
My guess is that the host family recognized only upon arrival that because of the guest they needed to upgrade the accommodation and rental car (one more room, one more car.) Edit: it's possible that the last addition to the group was not OP's daughter, but she's not family, hence she got charged.
Happy_Pandalover 10 months ago (edited)
If you invite someone, it means you cover their expenses. If you ask them to join, that‘s another thing. Now, did the other family really invite her daughter or did they only ask her to join? IMO either way i think with a big trip like this, you need to discuss the circumstances. Both parties failed here in my opion. She should have asked what their expectations are and they should have informed her about the costs beforehand. When i was younger i had a family invite me to their trips quite often. Usually it would be them driving by car and renting a house. They would provide my food and activities as Well. On the other hand my family would do the same for their daughters. We went to a more expensive vacation with flights and 5 star hotel once, so this one time they asked me to pay for my own flight/ hotel room and would treat me for dinner/activities there. It‘s just a matter of communication - beforehand of course.
ZestyBison 10 months ago
This is something that 100% needs to be discussed and settled prior to the acceptance of a trip. I would also recommend sending your child with some of their own money to address any emergencies or little forgotten things.
Andrea Steinacher 10 months ago
Well, there´s a difference between "invited" and "may come along", as my great--aunt made clear decades before I was born. She told my grandma that my mother is invited (= everything will be paid by auntie), my uncle may come (= not a penny would be spent on him by auntie) - she somehow didn´t like mum´s little brother
Related on Bored Panda
34
25