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Don't let how fluffy and adorable cats are fool you. Behind their precious paws and adorable purring, cats are criminal masterminds, equipped with murder mittens and the capability of concocting diabolical plans.

If you’re a cat owner, this will come as no surprise to you. But if your fur babies are not of the feline persuasion, you might be surprised to hear about some of the most mischievous “cat crimes” that have ever been committed.

Premee Mohamed recently tweeted about how the crime rate in her home has increased exponentially since she adopted a cat, and many other cat lovers were inspired to share their own pets’ criminal records. So enjoy scrolling through this hilarious list that might make you want to handcuff (paw-cuff?) your own little kitty, and keep reading to find conversations we were lucky enough to have with Premee, cat expert Heather Svoboda Miller, Communications and Development Manager at Cat Adoption Team, and Certified Cat Behavior Expert Rita Reimers. And remember to upvote the responses that you think would earn a cat felon some serious street cred!

Image credits: premeesaurus

#1

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Alexandra Davis
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Woke up this morning to one of my cats lying across me with his arm out stretched like that around my neck, so cute. The second I reach for my camera to take a photo of his cuteness and he sits bolt upright and starts posing for the camera instead!

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To learn more about how this conversation started in the first place, we reached out to Premee Mohamed, the author who started this viral thread holding cats accountable for their crimes. First, we wanted to know if Premee has always been a cat person or if this is a new adventure for her. “I've always liked cats, and I've hung out with the cats of friends and cat-sat a few times, but Fiasco is the first cat I've ever owned!” she told Bored Panda. “I adopted him in July 2022.”

We also asked Premee what has surprised her the most about having Fiasco. “I'm so new to cat ownership that everything is a surprise,” she shared. “I thought you couldn't touch cat bellies, but he loves being petted and brushed on his belly! Things going missing, I think I expected, but not to this extent. Not being able to go to the bathroom alone... People warned me about that, but I thought they were exaggerating.” 

“And I think most of all, I'm constantly surprised by how clingy he is! I thought cats slept most of the day and liked their own space, but he'd be attached to me with velcro if he could,” she added. “I feel like I might have to buy a pet sling, so I can work without interruption.”  

#2

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Upstaged75
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1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Mine brings me things while I sleep but she's definitely not quiet about it. She makes the standard "mighty hunter dragging home prey" noise for a while before she leaves it on the floor outside my bedroom. Then she gets in bed with me and lays across my legs so that I can't move. :)

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When it comes to what Premee thinks all other pet owners should know, she says, “Get pet insurance! This is a very boring thing to say but I think it's important!”

And as far as why we love these cats, despite their criminal nature, Premee told Bored Panda, “They're such funny, affectionate little animals, it's impossible not to love them! I swear I've learned something new about Fiasco every day, and laughed at him every day since I got him. He's worth the world even though he REALLY NEEDS to stop STEALING MY SOCKS AND STUFFING THEM UNDERNEATH THE BED.”

Finally, she added, “Support your local animal rescues and shelters if you can! They always need money, volunteers, food, blankets, and towels if you can spare it.”

And if you’d like to support Premee the author, as well as the cat owner, you can find her website and all of her books right here!  

#4

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Theresa Stephenson
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My cats never touched the tp however they have shredded some paper towels.

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#5

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Catman (He/Him)
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

No, that's my wiki. And your cats wiki. And every cats wiki. Actually, I think every cat has the same wiki.

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To learn even more about these fluffy little felons that we know and love, we reached out to cat expert Heather Svoboda Miller, Communications and Development Manager at Cat Adoption Team in Oregon, and she was kind enough to have a chat with us. First, we were curious why we perceive cats as so mischievous. “Cats are intelligent and trainable, but dogs tend to be easier for humans to train so I think many of us consider dogs to be more obedient, while we might think of cats as naughtier, more independent, or even apathetic,” Heather told Bored Panda. 

“Cats are clever, small, and agile, so they can make their way into unexpected spots where we might not want them to go — into the home ducting, on top of high beams, slipping out of a cat carrier — which makes them seem like little deviants when really they are just acrobatic and prone to hiding!” she explained. “While I love to think my cats understand me, I doubt they have any idea that I think of them as ornery. And if they did know, I doubt they'd care!”

#7

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CHRISTY SMITH
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That face looks like someone is not amused to be woken up to a camera in his face - that's not going to bode well for you Susan, no no, not at all.

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#8

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Christopher Creighton
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Every water pitcher. Every glass. Toilet. Pulls flowers out of vase to drink gross water. Has lovely refreshing fountain and another bowl. Hates them.

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#9

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Shyla Bouche
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Bouche hides her toy mice in the bathtub. The first time I discovered I wasn't alone in the tub was rather embarrassing.

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We also asked Heather why she thinks we love cats so much, despite their lengthy criminal records. “In my line of work, I talk with a lot of cat lovers and in my experience, we seem to love them not in spite of their ‘criminal’ behavior but because of it!” she noted. “Cats surprise and delight us with their antics, bringing laughter to our lives. When your cat swipes a loaf of bread off the counter, for instance, it's as hilarious as it is frustrating. Cat people just can't get enough of cats being ‘naughty’ (though I do wish they wouldn't eat all my cords!).”

#10

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Anyone-for-tea?
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don’t think a cat is able to carry a 3 tiered whatever that thing is called up the stairs!

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#11

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Olivia Lisbon
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Mine like snuggling like this too. I got a picture of one last night, he looked like a Jedi.

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And if the cat crimes in your home have gotten a little out of control, we asked Heather how they can be prevented or managed. “Some unwanted behavior is inevitable from any pet because some of their most natural instincts, scratching for example, are behaviors we don't always love in our homes,” she explained. “But with a little patience and effort, it's possible to reduce the number of ‘cat crimes’ committed in our homes through positive training methods, like clicker training, and by better understanding our pets' needs.”

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#13

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Alexandra Davis
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My Maine c**n hides his toys so his brothers can't find them. Yesterday I bought him a bag full of various cat toys and he spent ages on my bed playing with them and then when he was done he took his time to find his favourite toys and hid them in his bed (that none of the other cats use) and then ran off to play outside. He's done this since he was a kitten, he'll leave the toys he's not so bothered about, but his favourite ones must be hidden and cannot be played with by the others!

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#14

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Detective Miller's Hat
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My personal fav is when you hear an ALMIGHTY CRASH at 3 in the morning, but when you go investigate, not a single thing is broken or out of place.

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#15

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Paulo Freitas
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Mines do the exact same c**p, they basically fight with their water bowl, spill most if not all the water on the floor ( luckelly its a tile floor ), and then i have to get them more water, and the cicle begins again.... ( I found out that the best time to fill the bowl, is when the 2 a******s are sleeping, that way they don't fight it )

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“As experts in cat care, Cat Adoption Team offers a wealth of cat care and training information on our website,” Heather added. “Fear Free Happy Homes, Jackson Galaxy, Kitten Lady, Pam Johnson-Bennett, and Karen Pryor Clicker Training are a few other great resources. Depending your cat's personal brand of naughtiness, cat-proofing your home might mean putting valuable keepsakes in safe places your cat really can't reach, using child-safe locks to secure cabinet doors closed, tucking electrical cords into protective covers, and making sure there are plenty of people-approved scratching surfaces like cat trees or cardboard scratchers in areas where your cat spends their time.”

#16

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Edda Kamphues
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh yes, the great house plant assassin! I've moved to fakes, sadly. They still try to murder them though.

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#18

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Lakota Wolf
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Tuxedos are my lifelong favorite <3 I love every coat color, but my first cat was a tux and I have a soft spot for them :)

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Finally, Heather wants to remind cat owners to be aware of changes in their pet’s behavior. “Always remember that a new or strange cat behavior could be the result of a medical condition, so check with your veterinarian, especially if your cat is eliminating outside their litter box, eating or chewing odd items, vocalizing more frequently, hiding more or less, having trouble jumping/landing a jump, etc.,” she told Bored Panda. “You might learn that their ‘mischievous’ behavior is the result of pain or suffering, so you can take steps to help them feel better and improve the situation for everyone!”

If you’d like to gain even more guidance from the experts at Cat Adoption Team, be sure to visit their website right here!

#21

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Scrapiechick
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I attempted to grow cat mint (also referred to as cat smack in my family) a few years ago, got the young plants home and within minutes one was completely devoured and cat spent a good hour spaced out of her gourd under a bench in the garden

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We also reached out to the cat experts at Cat Behavior Alliance to hear their thoughts on this topic, and Certified Cat Behavior Expert Rita Reimers was kind enough to have a chat with us. "Cats are very intelligent, and they need to be played with, and have other things to do," Rita told Bored Panda. "If cats don’t have enough things to keep them busy, they will decide some of your items might be fun to steal. We have a small wild animal in our homes that have all of their natural instincts that still need to be fulfilled. Cats must hunt, cats must scratch, and cats must climb, and they will find ways to do these things in your home that might not be pleasing to you."

#23

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Potty pagan panda
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My ginger won’t touch a glass unless there’s water in it then it becomes his

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We also wanted to know Rita's thoughts on why we love our kitties so much despite their criminal behavior. "Cats are crepuscular, meaning they are most active at dusk and dawn when in nature they would be hunting for food," she explained. "Those late-night activities are what indoor cats do in place of the foraging they would be doing outside. Knocking things over, well, that is primarily to get your attention, and it usually done out of boredom. A bored cat is a mischievous cat! But one look at those whiskered faces, and of course, all is forgiven."

#25

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Karl Baxter
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

We haven’t had a tree in years because of our 2 wee rascals. Not worth the grief..

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When it comes to minimizing the amount of crimes taking place in your home, Rita says, "Environment enrichment, bringing the outdoors in, will help keep cats from getting bored, and boredom is where the mischievous actions come in. Things like cat trees, shelving to climb, cat grass, and self-play toys will help keep kitties engaged in activities that mimic what they would be doing in nature. Treat balls, puzzle feeders, and lick mats will keep cats challenged, and they serve to act in place of the hurting cats usually do for their food. It would also be a good idea to move breakables to places where your cats cannot get to them."

"Giving your cat plenty of things to do will help keep them out of trouble. But, cats are cats, and they are never going to be PURRfect. Love them as they are, while helping them be cats," Rita added.

If you'd like to learn more about how to keep your cat happy, healthy and (somewhat) out of trouble, be sure to visit the Cat Behavior Alliance's website right here!

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Are you feeling a bit scared of your feline friends after realizing the destruction that they are capable of? It’s important to know what you’re getting yourself into before adopting a cat, but as all cat owners will tell you, it’s totally worth the mayhem to get to share your life with a mischievous little fur ball. Keep upvoting the pics that you find most hilarious, or relatable if you’ve got some kitties of your own, and then if you’re interested in checking out a Bored Panda article celebrating cats’ adorable “murder mittens”, you can find that piece right here!  

#30

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Note: this post originally had 33 images. It’s been shortened to the top 30 images based on user votes.