Server Aghast After Coworker Reveals How She Deals With Customers Who Don’t Tip, Asks For Opinions

Leaving a tip has always been an expression of appreciation for good service. However, customers are being asked to tip more often with bigger sums and for more services than ever before. Workers in the industry are also starting to get so used to supplementing their paychecks with gratuity they don’t even know what to do if they don’t receive it. 

A server under the TikTok username @housecatchronicles recently brought up this issue in a short video after she was ‘stiffed’ by two tables in one night. She discussed this matter with a coworker who suggested she go to the customers to ask why they didn’t leave a gratuity, which rubbed her the wrong way.

Scroll down to find the full video and a conversation with customer service expert and founder of I Am Your Virtual Professional, David Levine, who kindly agreed to chat with us more about tips and how servers should behave if they don’t receive them.

Service workers are so used to receiving tips they don’t even know what to do when  customers don’t leave gratuity

Customer using a phone to pay at a restaurant, sparking a debate on tipping practices.

Image credits: Getty Images (not the actual photo)

When this server brought this issue to a coworker, she was advised to confront the customers who didn’t leave a tip

Text describing a server's experience of not receiving tips from two tables in one night, sparking a tipping debate.

Server discussing tipping issues at work, raising questions about customer tipping habits, with on-screen text explaining the situation.

Image credits: @housecatchronicles

Text about servers discussing a trend of not receiving tips from customers during their shift.

Text discussing a server's surprise at not receiving a tip from a couple, sparking debate on tipping norms.

Text message from server about asking customers why they didn’t tip.

Server discussing a viral debate about why customers didn't tip, with text overlay.

Image credits: @housecatchronicles

Text discussing a server's thoughts on asking customers why they didn't tip, sparking debate.

Text discussing a server's view on asking customers why they didn't tip, addressing tipping etiquette and norms in restaurants.

Server in a blue shirt and apron writing in a notepad, sparking debate on customer tipping practices.

Image credits: Getty Images (not the actual photo)

Text discussing the debate about servers asking customers why they didn't tip.

A text image discussing a server's approach to asking why customers didn't tip.

A person counting money from a wallet over a plate of pasta, sparking a debate on tipping etiquette.

Image credits: Curated Lifestyle (not the actual photo)

Text asks servers and bartenders their thoughts about questioning why customers didn’t tip, sparking debate.

You can find the server’s full video here:

@housecatchronicles#restaurant#restaurantindustry#server#serviceindustry#hospitality#bar#bartender#tip#tipping#fyp♬ original sound – not a quick question

57% of servers wages on avarage are collected from customer tips

Hand placing a dollar bill in a tip jar, sparking a debate on tipping culture.

Image credits: Lala Azizli (not the actual photo)

For years, tips have made up the bulk of restaurant servers’ pay. According to the newest data from the ADP Research Institute, base wages for these workers currently comprise 43% of their paycheck on average, which means that the rest 57% are collected from customer tips.

Even though the base wage grew 8% from 2020 to 2024, gratuity still makes up the biggest part of servers’ salaries. Since they are dependent on tips to make a livable wage, it’s not surprising that they have attached a great significance to it and feel ‘stiffed’ or don’t know how to behave when they don’t receive it.

Customer service expert and founder of I Am Your Virtual Professional, David Levine, tries to see both sides of the coin but also believes that it might not be a bad idea to approach a customer when they don’t leave a tip to their server.

“I can understand why the server in the video chose not to approach the customer. I also think that sometimes it is OK to make people feel uncomfortable,” he said to Bored Panda. The server also speaks about the social contract, which he thinks the clients should be a part of too. Even if they aren’t satisfied with the service, they should still leave a tip, just a low one so it signals their dissatisfaction.

“In that way, if their server approaches them and asks why the tip was low, they can give them the reasons they chose to provide them with the tip they did. It also makes it more difficult for the server to chalk it up to the customer just being cheap and that perhaps it is a reflection on the service that they are providing their clients.”

“A server can ask what he/she could have done better to make the meal more enjoyable”

Server discussing tipping with a customer in a cafe, sparking a debate on tipping customs.

Image credits: Getty Images (not the actual photo)

In case a server gathers the courage to go up to the customer to inquire about a tip, Levine recommends them having a prepared script and taking a deep breath physically and emotionally before asking. “It is an uncomfortable question, and I can understand why the server in the video did not ask it. However, if framed correctly, it can be a learning experience. A server can ask what he/she could have done better to make the meal more enjoyable.”

In general, Levine suggests service workers take a deep breath and try to put themselves in the position of the customer when they don’t receive a tip. “Is it possible that the customer’s experience was negative because of a misunderstanding or a perception that the server did not mean? Was the server too talkative, or maybe not talkative enough? Self-introspection is essential not only to evaluate the last transaction but also for future encounters with clients,” he said.

However, Levine still believes that no matter the service received, all customers should tip their servers. “A large part of a server’s income is based on their tips. That being said, not all services are equal, nor are all tips equal. When I have had poor service, I have left 10% for atrocious service or 15% for decent service, realizing people have bad days, are clueless, or are poorly trained,” he said.

“Additionally, I have left as much as 20-25% when I have had outstanding service. Unfortunately, not everyone is introspective. Often, a server will not question what happened with that table or customer and will automatically put it on the customer for being cheap.”

Many people shared the server’s opinion, saying that tips aren’t mandatory

Customer feedback on tipping debate: "Tips are GIFTS! It’s rude to ask why no tip.

Comment questioning missing tips in a viral debate about servers asking why customers didn't tip, with 4722 likes.

Comment discussing tipping practices and gratuity for international customers.

Customer comment about tipping, server asks why no tip, sparking debate, customer doesn't return.

Comment discussion on tipping norms, questioning the values instilled in servers, with a heart icon showing 690 likes.

Comment discussing the debate over tipping requirements, questioning when tipping became mandatory, with 321 likes.

Image of a comment on tipping debate, stating confronting customers for not tipping is a fireable offense.

Comment on tipping debate: "The audacity of stiffing you and continuing to sip their coffee is wild," with 1867 likes.

Comment discussing a server asking why a customer didn't tip, with an explanation about service charge confusion.

Comment on tipping debate: user disagrees with server asking why customers didn't tip.

Comment discussing tipping decline, mentioning low tipping rates and financial strain.

Comment on tipping ethics in response to a debate about asking why customers didn’t tip, with a profile picture beside it.

Comment on tipping etiquette in viral server debate.

Fine dining GM comments on tipping less, sparking viral debate with 541 likes.

Comment on server asking about tipping, sparking viral debate on customer behavior and social contracts.

Comment discussing tipping and fixed income, part of a viral debate on asking why customers didn't tip.

Comment by Kristine on tipping culture with 29 likes, related to a debate on why customers didn’t tip.

Customer comment discussing tipping's decline, sparking server debate online.

Comment on tipping debate: "Asking why customers didn’t tip is rude," says Estherlina, sparking viral discussion.

Comment discussing tipping, debates on asking reasons for no tips, and advocating for livable wages in the dining industry.

Comment debating tipping after server's question goes viral, addressing food cost and service value.

A server comments on asking customers about not tipping, gaining 126 likes.

Comment discussing server asking customers about tipping, sparking a viral debate.

Comment discussing tipping culture in the US, highlighting it's not mandatory, linked to a debate on customer tipping behavior.

Comment about a server, a door guy, and a missing tip causing a negative experience.

Social media comment discussing the impact of servers confronting customers about tipping.

Comment on debate about servers asking why customers didn't tip, expressing frustration over declined service quality.

Server discusses asking customers about tipping in a social media comment.

Comment discussing consumer tipping fatigue in the context of servers seeking reasons for no tips.

Comment on tipping, stating practice of tipping even for subpar service, sparking a viral debate.

Comment on tipping etiquette in a debate, stating it's rude not to tip but optional.

Comment discussing a server's viral debate on asking customers about tipping choices.

Comment on tipping debate, suggesting fair wages instead.

Comment discussing if servers should ask customers why they didn’t tip.

Comment on tipping debate: "Getting stiffed is not paying the bill. Tipping is optional" with 4 likes.

Comment discussing debate on whether servers should ask why customers didn’t tip.

Comment discussing a server asking why a tip was low, sparking a debate.

Comment discussing servers asking customers about tips, sparking a viral debate.

Comment on tipping frustration, referencing a viral debate about servers asking why customers didn't tip.

Comment discussing tipping culture, sparking debate about servers asking why customers didn’t tip.

Comment debating if servers should ask why customers didn’t tip.

Comment discussing server inquiry about customer tipping decisions, sparking viral debate.

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