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114
Server Aghast After Coworker Reveals How She Deals With Customers Who Don’t Tip, Asks For Opinions
Interview With Expert
Leaving a tip has always been an expression of appreciation for good service. However, customers are being asked to tip more often with bigger sums and for more services than ever before. Workers in the industry are also starting to get so used to supplementing their paychecks with gratuity they don’t even know what to do if they don’t receive it.
A server under the TikTok username @housecatchronicles recently brought up this issue in a short video after she was ‘stiffed’ by two tables in one night. She discussed this matter with a coworker who suggested she go to the customers to ask why they didn’t leave a gratuity, which rubbed her the wrong way.
Scroll down to find the full video and a conversation with customer service expert and founder of I Am Your Virtual Professional, David Levine, who kindly agreed to chat with us more about tips and how servers should behave if they don’t receive them.
RELATED:
Service workers are so used to receiving tips they don’t even know what to do when customers don’t leave gratuity
Image credits: Getty Images (not the actual photo)
When this server brought this issue to a coworker, she was advised to confront the customers who didn’t leave a tip
Image credits: @housecatchronicles
Image credits: @housecatchronicles
Image credits: Getty Images (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Curated Lifestyle (not the actual photo)
You can find the server’s full video here:
@housecatchronicles#restaurant#restaurantindustry#server#serviceindustry#hospitality#bar#bartender#tip#tipping#fyp♬ original sound – not a quick question
57% of servers wages on avarage are collected from customer tips
Image credits: Lala Azizli (not the actual photo)
For years, tips have made up the bulk of restaurant servers’ pay. According to the newest data from the ADP Research Institute, base wages for these workers currently comprise 43% of their paycheck on average, which means that the rest 57% are collected from customer tips.
Even though the base wage grew 8% from 2020 to 2024, gratuity still makes up the biggest part of servers’ salaries. Since they are dependent on tips to make a livable wage, it’s not surprising that they have attached a great significance to it and feel ‘stiffed’ or don’t know how to behave when they don’t receive it.
Customer service expert and founder of I Am Your Virtual Professional, David Levine, tries to see both sides of the coin but also believes that it might not be a bad idea to approach a customer when they don’t leave a tip to their server.
“I can understand why the server in the video chose not to approach the customer. I also think that sometimes it is OK to make people feel uncomfortable,” he said to Bored Panda. The server also speaks about the social contract, which he thinks the clients should be a part of too. Even if they aren’t satisfied with the service, they should still leave a tip, just a low one so it signals their dissatisfaction.
“In that way, if their server approaches them and asks why the tip was low, they can give them the reasons they chose to provide them with the tip they did. It also makes it more difficult for the server to chalk it up to the customer just being cheap and that perhaps it is a reflection on the service that they are providing their clients.”
“A server can ask what he/she could have done better to make the meal more enjoyable”
Image credits: Getty Images (not the actual photo)
In case a server gathers the courage to go up to the customer to inquire about a tip, Levine recommends them having a prepared script and taking a deep breath physically and emotionally before asking. “It is an uncomfortable question, and I can understand why the server in the video did not ask it. However, if framed correctly, it can be a learning experience. A server can ask what he/she could have done better to make the meal more enjoyable.”
In general, Levine suggests service workers take a deep breath and try to put themselves in the position of the customer when they don’t receive a tip. “Is it possible that the customer’s experience was negative because of a misunderstanding or a perception that the server did not mean? Was the server too talkative, or maybe not talkative enough? Self-introspection is essential not only to evaluate the last transaction but also for future encounters with clients,” he said.
However, Levine still believes that no matter the service received, all customers should tip their servers. “A large part of a server’s income is based on their tips. That being said, not all services are equal, nor are all tips equal. When I have had poor service, I have left 10% for atrocious service or 15% for decent service, realizing people have bad days, are clueless, or are poorly trained,” he said.
“Additionally, I have left as much as 20-25% when I have had outstanding service. Unfortunately, not everyone is introspective. Often, a server will not question what happened with that table or customer and will automatically put it on the customer for being cheap.”
Many people shared the server’s opinion, saying that tips aren’t mandatory
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What do you think ?
London Paris 10 months ago
Maybe you guys should get together and vote for candidates who support paying a living wage like the rest of the planet.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 10 months ago
A lot of us try to :( Unfortunately, a lot of the Orange Thing's cultists are retired, rich, or both, so they never had to worry about earning enough to survive on. And the cultists who are poor and desperate were unfortunately desperate enough to believe the lies he spews and the promises he makes with no intent to keep them.
Load More Replies...
Roberta Surprenant 10 months ago
A tip, by definition is a freely given gratuity. Nobody is ENTITLED to one.
Sacred Panda 10 months ago
You only tip if you like it and it is not norm. Tipping your banker for doing a good job, tipping your teacher for teaching your kid, tipping the contractor for aligning the windows,... Crazy bastards
turk 10 months ago
Not only is tipping out of control, but tips are routinely asked for before service is given. I bought a sub sandwich the other day and had to pay in advance (as it is fast food). And the tip message comes up on 20% as I pay. I can knock it down to 15% (which I did) or up to 25% or "custom". For a sub sandwich. And now I'm wondering if they will not make my food quickly or do something else unsavory to my food because I knocked it down to 15%. I'd be even more worried if I didn't tip at all. And they did leave out one of my condiments I requested. Was it because I didn't tip the "suggested" 20%? Or just a mistake. This is also true of food delivery. When I tip before they even accept the delivery, where is the incentive for them to be prompt or accurate with my order? Often, they pick up my order, make numerous deliveries and miss the estimated time and deliver my food cold. It's literally blackmail. There certainly is no option to retrieve my tip, only to complain.
Funhog 10 months ago
Similarly, I went to Panara Bread where customers approach the counter to order food and beverages. Payment is made and there are options for a tip on the screen (fortunately there is a 0% option for tip.. but, now your post has caused me to question how well my food was made..). When the food is ready, they call out my name and I go get it and bring it back to the table. They give an empty cup for me to fill at the beverage station and I bus my own table afterward. I find it tacky that establishments like this prompt me for a tip for "service" -- there is no service provided because this is self-service. However, I don't mind tipping at restaurants that provide actual service at my table because I view it that I made an agreement to tip my server when I decided to eat there.
Load More Replies...
Scott Rackley 10 months ago
Worked as a server in high school and a bartender later. Absolutely do not do this. Especially nowadays with reviews on the internet, I would expect the owner/manager would be very keen on finding out who it was and firing them. Sometimes people don't tip, shrug.
turk 10 months ago
Unionization is impossible in the United States right now due to Trump. He fired people from the NLRB so they do not have the proper quorum to certify any union votes. And you only have 90 days to certify. But he's for the working man and woman. Sure.
Load More Replies...
Pittsburgh rare 10 months ago
Telling them that you "rely on tips" as someone suggested prompts the conversation of why in a supposedly civilised country anyone's livelihood relies on tips. Anyway, the tipping culture has got out of hand for a long time now, people are simply tired and with increasing cost of living they'll tip less or avoid eating out altogether. You can finally organise and fight for a living wage or keep whining on TikTok.
Aurora 10 months ago
I'm so happy to live in a place where tipping is not a thing. As far as I can see, US servers refuse to unionize because it makes them more money to emotionally blackmail tips from customers. At least that's the most common argument I see from them when they argue against raising the minimum wage instead of tips.
Maisey Myles 10 months ago
Until businesses pay their employees a decent wage, I will continue to tip my server(s). If I expect someone to wait on my lazy a*s, they will be rewarded for it.
UKGrandad 10 months ago
One thing that I've never understood is why a tip is expected to be a certain percentage of the final bill. It takes server #1 the same amount of time to carry four £20 plates of food to a table as it does for server #2 to carry four £40 plates of food, and yet with a 20% tip server #1 will be tipped £16 while server #2 receives twice as much for doing exactly the same amount of work.
London Paris 10 months ago
Maybe you guys should get together and vote for candidates who support paying a living wage like the rest of the planet.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 10 months ago
A lot of us try to :( Unfortunately, a lot of the Orange Thing's cultists are retired, rich, or both, so they never had to worry about earning enough to survive on. And the cultists who are poor and desperate were unfortunately desperate enough to believe the lies he spews and the promises he makes with no intent to keep them.
Load More Replies... Roberta Surprenant 10 months ago
A tip, by definition is a freely given gratuity. Nobody is ENTITLED to one.
Sacred Panda 10 months ago
You only tip if you like it and it is not norm. Tipping your banker for doing a good job, tipping your teacher for teaching your kid, tipping the contractor for aligning the windows,... Crazy bastards
turk 10 months ago
Not only is tipping out of control, but tips are routinely asked for before service is given. I bought a sub sandwich the other day and had to pay in advance (as it is fast food). And the tip message comes up on 20% as I pay. I can knock it down to 15% (which I did) or up to 25% or "custom". For a sub sandwich. And now I'm wondering if they will not make my food quickly or do something else unsavory to my food because I knocked it down to 15%. I'd be even more worried if I didn't tip at all. And they did leave out one of my condiments I requested. Was it because I didn't tip the "suggested" 20%? Or just a mistake. This is also true of food delivery. When I tip before they even accept the delivery, where is the incentive for them to be prompt or accurate with my order? Often, they pick up my order, make numerous deliveries and miss the estimated time and deliver my food cold. It's literally blackmail. There certainly is no option to retrieve my tip, only to complain.
Funhog 10 months ago
Similarly, I went to Panara Bread where customers approach the counter to order food and beverages. Payment is made and there are options for a tip on the screen (fortunately there is a 0% option for tip.. but, now your post has caused me to question how well my food was made..). When the food is ready, they call out my name and I go get it and bring it back to the table. They give an empty cup for me to fill at the beverage station and I bus my own table afterward. I find it tacky that establishments like this prompt me for a tip for "service" -- there is no service provided because this is self-service. However, I don't mind tipping at restaurants that provide actual service at my table because I view it that I made an agreement to tip my server when I decided to eat there.
Load More Replies... Scott Rackley 10 months ago
Worked as a server in high school and a bartender later. Absolutely do not do this. Especially nowadays with reviews on the internet, I would expect the owner/manager would be very keen on finding out who it was and firing them. Sometimes people don't tip, shrug.
turk 10 months ago
Unionization is impossible in the United States right now due to Trump. He fired people from the NLRB so they do not have the proper quorum to certify any union votes. And you only have 90 days to certify. But he's for the working man and woman. Sure.
Load More Replies... Pittsburgh rare 10 months ago
Telling them that you "rely on tips" as someone suggested prompts the conversation of why in a supposedly civilised country anyone's livelihood relies on tips. Anyway, the tipping culture has got out of hand for a long time now, people are simply tired and with increasing cost of living they'll tip less or avoid eating out altogether. You can finally organise and fight for a living wage or keep whining on TikTok.
Aurora 10 months ago
I'm so happy to live in a place where tipping is not a thing. As far as I can see, US servers refuse to unionize because it makes them more money to emotionally blackmail tips from customers. At least that's the most common argument I see from them when they argue against raising the minimum wage instead of tips.
Maisey Myles 10 months ago
Until businesses pay their employees a decent wage, I will continue to tip my server(s). If I expect someone to wait on my lazy a*s, they will be rewarded for it.
UKGrandad 10 months ago
One thing that I've never understood is why a tip is expected to be a certain percentage of the final bill. It takes server #1 the same amount of time to carry four £20 plates of food to a table as it does for server #2 to carry four £40 plates of food, and yet with a 20% tip server #1 will be tipped £16 while server #2 receives twice as much for doing exactly the same amount of work.
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