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Antivaxxer Mom Keeps Her Kids Malnourished, Goes Berserk When She Learns Her Niece Has Been Secretly Feeding Them
Antivaxxer Mom Keeps Her Kids Malnourished, Goes Berserk When She Learns Her Niece Has Been Secretly Feeding Them
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Antivaxxer Mom Keeps Her Kids Malnourished, Goes Berserk When She Learns Her Niece Has Been Secretly Feeding Them

249

Every parent has the right to raise their kids their own way, right? Well, if they set unhealthy rules that lead to dire consequences, that should not be the case. While some may still say it’s not our place to dictate how moms and dads should do their job, Reddit user throwaway20030420 couldn’t just stand by and do nothing.

When her aunt, who is a “self-proclaimed hippie”, lost her job half a year ago, the 18-year-old was put in charge of looking after the little ones. Even though she obeyed the rules at first, the woman changed her opinion after witnessing how they affected her cousins: “They never had enough energy to do anything, didn’t want to run or play like most kids their age and just looked miserable in general.”

So she decided to take action. The woman secretly tweaked their diet and saw how the children started changing for the better. Everything seemed to go smoothly until one day, the aunt found out and completely lost it. But it turns out it was only the beginning of this whole family drama. Read on to find out how the story unfolded.

RELATED:

    A woman recently turned to the AITA subreddit to ask whether she was wrong to go against her aunt’s rules while babysitting her cousins

    Image credits: Kelly Sikkema (not the actual photo)

    The 18 Y.O. couldn’t stand seeing how the kids are deprived of food and medical assistance, so she decided to take action

    After the post received a lot of attention, the woman shared more details about the situation

    Later on, she added she was able to locate the kids’ dad

    Image credits: throwaway20030420

    To learn more about the challenges babysitters face and how to respond to them, we reached out to Bethany, a professional nanny based in the UK. “Caring for somebody else’s children is a huge privilege and responsibility. It becomes even more complex when caring for close family and friends, as this removes the professional barrier,” she told Bored Panda.

    She explained that ultimately, nannies must respect their employers’ wishes. “If there are legitimate safeguarding concerns, these should be raised with the parents and, if appropriate, with your local safeguarding team.”

    However, Bethany argued that in this particular situation, there are many complexities. “Firstly, the person was not employed or working under any contract — they were simply carrying out a favor for a family member. Secondly, the author does not appear to have any training or qualifications, hence they did not know how to manage the situation.”

    According to the professional nanny, ideally, the author should have followed these steps:

    • Notice issues, and collect evidence (photos, videos, observations, etc.)
    • Have a professional conversation with the parents, presenting their observations and, where possible, sharing best practices, local guidelines, and legislation
    • Notify the parent that you have a legal duty of care towards the children and their well being
    • Should you have further concerns, you can contact the NSPCC or your local child protection services for advice

    “Raising a safeguarding concern is an uncomfortable situation, however, it is the right thing to do,” Bethany said and added that it is still never a nanny’s place to make parenting decisions on behalf of or without consulting the parents.

    People agreed the mother’s actions were extremely harmful, here’s what they had to say

    Ellen Smith, a clinical associate professor and child welfare training coordinator at the University of Wisconsin, told Fatherly that Child Protective Services (CPS) “has the power to intervene in one of the most fundamental relationships that Americans have: the right for parents to make decisions about how to take care of their own children.”

    Smith stated that calling CPS is necessary for some situations, and explained the top three reasons when to do it. The first one is physical abuse. “Does the child have signs of injury or do you believe there’s an imminent threat of violence?” Then, sexual abuse: “Have you seen certain behavioral signs, such as flinching or raising of hands in a defensive manner?”

    The last reason is neglect. She suggested raising these questions: “Does the child live in an unlivable environment? Are they left alone for long periods of time without proper care?” When it comes to neglect, other signs to look out for are noticing whether the child has been harmed, if the person who is legally responsible failed to provide a minimal degree of care, and if that failure caused harm or impairment to the child.

    The professor also stressed that while some behaviors can be misleading, they should still be reported. You see, it’s not a caller’s job to determine whether abuse or neglect occurred. Their main task is to provide observations and information to CPS that helps social workers. So whenever you believe there’s a legitimate reason (and solid evidence) to call CPS, do so, so the experts themselves can determine whether the child’s living conditions are severe enough to warrant intervention.

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    Ieva Gailiūtė

    Ieva Gailiūtė

    Writer, Community member

    Read more »

    Ieva is a writer at Bored Panda who graduated in Scandinavian studies from Vilnius University. After learning the Swedish language and getting completely lost in the world of Scandinavian mythology, she figured out that translating and writing is what she's passionate about. When not writing, Ieva enjoys making jewelry, going on hikes, reading and drinking coffee.

    Read less »
    Ieva Gailiūtė

    Ieva Gailiūtė

    Writer, Community member

    Ieva is a writer at Bored Panda who graduated in Scandinavian studies from Vilnius University. After learning the Swedish language and getting completely lost in the world of Scandinavian mythology, she figured out that translating and writing is what she's passionate about. When not writing, Ieva enjoys making jewelry, going on hikes, reading and drinking coffee.

    Mindaugas Balčiauskas

    Mindaugas Balčiauskas

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    I'm a visual editor at Bored Panda. I kickstart my day with a mug of coffee bigger than my head, ready to tackle Photoshop. I navigate through the digital jungle with finesse, fueled by bamboo breaks and caffeine kicks. When the workday winds down, you might catch me devouring bamboo snacks while binging on the latest TV show, gaming or I could be out in nature, soaking up the tranquility and communing with my inner panda.

    Read less »

    Mindaugas Balčiauskas

    Mindaugas Balčiauskas

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    I'm a visual editor at Bored Panda. I kickstart my day with a mug of coffee bigger than my head, ready to tackle Photoshop. I navigate through the digital jungle with finesse, fueled by bamboo breaks and caffeine kicks. When the workday winds down, you might catch me devouring bamboo snacks while binging on the latest TV show, gaming or I could be out in nature, soaking up the tranquility and communing with my inner panda.

    What do you think ?
    MiriPanda
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What her aunt is doing is child abuse, full stop.

    Ramona Jackson
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It absolutely qualifies as child neglect. This woman sounds as though she has several screws loose. Here's hoping the children get into a place where they're cared for and nurtured.

    Load More Replies...
    Carol Emory
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Fat free no carb is not a healthy diet for kids. They need fat to develop brain tissue and they need carbs for energy and muscles. A severely restricted diet can cause more health issues than they solve. If she wants to eat and live that way...great. Save the kids while you can.

    BorPand8
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Fat free low carb isn't healthy for anyone. People need to get their energy from somewhere.

    Load More Replies...
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    Ace Girl
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    HERO. I stan. Way to go OP!

    -
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Agreed - what an amazing older cousin!

    Load More Replies...
    Lara Verne
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She can live her life how she wants, but denying her children nourishment and healthcare they need is abuse.

    A Dasher Panda
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    No, she CANNOT live her life how SHE wants. That went OUT the door upon birth of the 1st child. You're 100% wrong. If you're going to have children, THEIR life becomes the biggest part of YOUR life. Full stop.

    Load More Replies...
    Virtually Fabulous
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is horrifying. Nutrition is a big deal to me, because I have had unhealthy eating habits and used to be underweight, so this post hurts a little. I really hope it's fake, but it probably isn't. If I were in that situation I'd dump those friends who made OP think she might be the AH.

    Kuchi Kopi
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I assumed because OP is basically still a kid that's why her friends don't know what constitute abuse or not. (Sheltered) teenagers can seem like adults but really don't have the context needed to fully understand why it's abusive. I wish they did, but most teens are just not going to be taught that unless they escaped a bad situation at home. If someone explains to them why it is neglect/abuse, and they refuse to accept that from a reliable source (teacher or educational video, you know) then yeah maybe they are crappy people. My bet is that they just don't really get it because they haven't seen abuse up close and don't understand it. Hell, many adults don't even know it when they see it! It takes education.

    Load More Replies...
    kaycee14
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How does an 18 year old legal adult get grounded??

    Joe Reaves
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She clearly lives with her parents, so her parents can ground her if they want to. They shouldn't. They should be congratulating her and patting themselves on the back for raising such a great person. Although given the family reactions I'm beginning to wonder if grandma raised her,

    Load More Replies...
    Thalia Lovering
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Those kids were abused, this young lady has done remarkably, and I can't help but wonder why only one person is supporting her...

    April Dancer
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The age old response I'm afraid - keep the peace

    Load More Replies...
    JuniorCJ82
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    WITAF are you "grounded"? First of all, you're 18. Second of all, you did NOTHING wrong insofar as you made those poor kids' lives better!!! WTF would your parents be on your whackadoodle aunt's side?!?!

    Beverly Rinehart
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Your parents don't want issues dealing with this woman. They have decided it is okay to ignore the children's issues because it makes life easier for them. You know the same information and are choosing to do the right thing. Be prepared for things to be blown apart when their dad shows up. Your aunt will continue to blame you and sadly, I think your parents will do the same. Be prepared. You can talk to CPS before reporting to get more information on what goes into their decision. Be aware that depriving them of food IS abuse. Maybe you could find pictures of what they looked like before you started feeding them. As an educator of 30 yrs I've seen many types of parenting and dealt with lots of crazy people pretending to be a good parent. I take exception with the person who said teachers have mandated reporting to child services. Teachers are often told NOT to report because admin doesn't want to deal with crazy parents, like your aunt.

    Load More Replies...
    StayClassy
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    SOMEONE has to be an advocate for these kids! Good on you!

    Bunzilla
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What the person in the last comment missed is that, by denying her children having any form of fat, she was preventing them from gaining proper nutrients from their food. Fat helps you absorb nutrients from your food. No wonder they were so malnourished. I think they might be able to test the kids' hair to see they were malnourished in the past? Or they could contact their teachers and ask them. Hopefully the courts will side with the dad and get those poor kids away from their mother. I also have to wonder how she thought denying the older kid from his glasses was going to help him? I guess she figured that not giving her kid glasses would make him not need them? Very confusing. I wouldn't call her a 'hippy', she's just straight up crazy.

    Load More Comments
    MiriPanda
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What her aunt is doing is child abuse, full stop.

    Ramona Jackson
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It absolutely qualifies as child neglect. This woman sounds as though she has several screws loose. Here's hoping the children get into a place where they're cared for and nurtured.

    Load More Replies...
    Carol Emory
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Fat free no carb is not a healthy diet for kids. They need fat to develop brain tissue and they need carbs for energy and muscles. A severely restricted diet can cause more health issues than they solve. If she wants to eat and live that way...great. Save the kids while you can.

    BorPand8
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Fat free low carb isn't healthy for anyone. People need to get their energy from somewhere.

    Load More Replies...
    ADVERTISEMENT
    Ace Girl
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    HERO. I stan. Way to go OP!

    -
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Agreed - what an amazing older cousin!

    Load More Replies...
    Lara Verne
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She can live her life how she wants, but denying her children nourishment and healthcare they need is abuse.

    A Dasher Panda
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    No, she CANNOT live her life how SHE wants. That went OUT the door upon birth of the 1st child. You're 100% wrong. If you're going to have children, THEIR life becomes the biggest part of YOUR life. Full stop.

    Load More Replies...
    Virtually Fabulous
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is horrifying. Nutrition is a big deal to me, because I have had unhealthy eating habits and used to be underweight, so this post hurts a little. I really hope it's fake, but it probably isn't. If I were in that situation I'd dump those friends who made OP think she might be the AH.

    Kuchi Kopi
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I assumed because OP is basically still a kid that's why her friends don't know what constitute abuse or not. (Sheltered) teenagers can seem like adults but really don't have the context needed to fully understand why it's abusive. I wish they did, but most teens are just not going to be taught that unless they escaped a bad situation at home. If someone explains to them why it is neglect/abuse, and they refuse to accept that from a reliable source (teacher or educational video, you know) then yeah maybe they are crappy people. My bet is that they just don't really get it because they haven't seen abuse up close and don't understand it. Hell, many adults don't even know it when they see it! It takes education.

    Load More Replies...
    kaycee14
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How does an 18 year old legal adult get grounded??

    Joe Reaves
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She clearly lives with her parents, so her parents can ground her if they want to. They shouldn't. They should be congratulating her and patting themselves on the back for raising such a great person. Although given the family reactions I'm beginning to wonder if grandma raised her,

    Load More Replies...
    Thalia Lovering
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Those kids were abused, this young lady has done remarkably, and I can't help but wonder why only one person is supporting her...

    April Dancer
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The age old response I'm afraid - keep the peace

    Load More Replies...
    JuniorCJ82
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    WITAF are you "grounded"? First of all, you're 18. Second of all, you did NOTHING wrong insofar as you made those poor kids' lives better!!! WTF would your parents be on your whackadoodle aunt's side?!?!

    Beverly Rinehart
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Your parents don't want issues dealing with this woman. They have decided it is okay to ignore the children's issues because it makes life easier for them. You know the same information and are choosing to do the right thing. Be prepared for things to be blown apart when their dad shows up. Your aunt will continue to blame you and sadly, I think your parents will do the same. Be prepared. You can talk to CPS before reporting to get more information on what goes into their decision. Be aware that depriving them of food IS abuse. Maybe you could find pictures of what they looked like before you started feeding them. As an educator of 30 yrs I've seen many types of parenting and dealt with lots of crazy people pretending to be a good parent. I take exception with the person who said teachers have mandated reporting to child services. Teachers are often told NOT to report because admin doesn't want to deal with crazy parents, like your aunt.

    Load More Replies...
    StayClassy
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    SOMEONE has to be an advocate for these kids! Good on you!

    Bunzilla
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What the person in the last comment missed is that, by denying her children having any form of fat, she was preventing them from gaining proper nutrients from their food. Fat helps you absorb nutrients from your food. No wonder they were so malnourished. I think they might be able to test the kids' hair to see they were malnourished in the past? Or they could contact their teachers and ask them. Hopefully the courts will side with the dad and get those poor kids away from their mother. I also have to wonder how she thought denying the older kid from his glasses was going to help him? I guess she figured that not giving her kid glasses would make him not need them? Very confusing. I wouldn't call her a 'hippy', she's just straight up crazy.

    Load More Comments
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