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Person Gives A Spot-On Explanation Of Rejection-Sensitive Dysphoria, Many Are Surprised This ADHD Symptom Has A Name
Having a mental disorder is one of the hardest things to explain to others. It’s scrambling for words to describe the feeling of unease and excruciation that this disorder causes when it has heaps of subtle nuances that are often buried underneath the rubble of our psyche.
And on top of it all, there’s the fear that someone will respond negatively because they simply can’t relate or empathize. It’s a lot of things that simply can’t be put into a textbook definition for everyone to understand it. But it is truly a blessing when someone is able to finally put it into perspective—into words that make sense to people on multiple levels.
Twitter user @paintedbees has shared their spot-on explanation of a nuance of ADHD that is often overlooked, but ends up being one of the biggest issues people suffering from this disorder have to deal with. And it resonated with a lot of people on Twitter.
RELATED:
It’s hard to put the feeling of having a mental disorder that affects your social and personal life into words
Image credits: Garry Knight
So, artist and Twitter user @paintedbees shared their take on rejection-sensitive dysphoria, an extreme emotional sensitivity and pain triggered by a perception that a person has been rejected or criticized by people they care about.
Huge emphasis on the perception part here, as it is a conviction that’s often not based on some logical conclusion, but rather on the way the brain perceives the situation for one reason or another. In turn, it calls out a strong emotional response that pushes a person into this vicious spiral of self-loathing, depression, dread, and anxiety.
But sometimes people find the right words, and this Tweeter’s explanation of Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria has resonated with many
Image credits: paintedbees
“You Feel Like Folks Are Trying To Enjoy Themselves, Not With You But Despite You”
Image credits: Mayastar
In the thread, it’s explained as a feeling as if people are trying to enjoy themselves, but not with an ADHD person, rather despite them. And it is often triggered by an innocuous statement, one that inherently has nothing negative about it. But then perception kicks in and so it begins.
“Your interest in it drops like a stone, you don’t want to be a part anymore. You want to go home, by yourself, and hide from the responsibility of it. What happened? A normal human interaction happened that your brain interpreted as ‘they don’t like what you’re doing. You’re doing it wrong. You’re letting them down.’”
The thread started getting traction among internauts, prompting them to expand with some additional tweets
Image credits: paintedbees
The tweet thread resonated with a lot of people and ended up going viral, garnering over 15,000 likes and 6,400 retweets. It even found its way on to Imgur, where if got over 125,000 views with almost 4,000 upvotes.
Many didn’t even know that this particular nuance was even a thing and that it had a name—rejection-sensitive dysphoria. Many others were thankful for the spot-on explanation as they were looking for words to explain this to others—and by proxy, for people understanding this and relating to it.
What are your thoughts on this? Let us know in the comment section below!
Many responded to this thread, thanking for a spot-on explanation, feeling understood and sharing stories
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What do you think ?
Joonscrab 5 years ago
I have ADHD And Anxiety... The combo feels great ....I just don't know if what I feel is due to Anxiety or adhd sometimes lmfao..
Load More Replies...
Nikki Sevven 5 years ago
Wait...this is a thing? It has a name? OMG, I thought it was just random anxiety. The feeling is awful, as if your heart just dropped into your gut. As if the multi-channel intrusive thoughts, spotify on infinite repeat, can't remember anything for a second, and bored with everything but fidgety stuff wasn't enough.
Mimi M 5 years ago
That's the first time I've heard of rejection-sensitivity being described as an ADHD symptom. It's usually mentioned as a symptom of depression (esp. atypical depression) and/or social-anxiety.
Dark Empress 4 years ago
Consider atypical depression normally has to do with dopamine vs major depression which is more serotonin related and it actually makes a lot of sense.
Load More Replies...
RavenClaw 5 years ago (edited)
I have adhd and autism i feel this ..but it depends .. with my parents it doesnt effect me like that .. but with friends and outside family it can get arkward and tiring and feels like your going into a pit that you can never escape and your mind gets foggy ..and for people without it imagine your doing a test that never ends and every question get harder
Ericka s 5 years ago
I didn't know this had a name or that other people went through it. I just thought I was a shitty, awkward person that wasn't good at anything.
Carrie Laughs 5 years ago
The one thing I have learned is that we're never alone - there are 1000s of us shitty, awkward people, whether there is a reason or a condition causing it or not. We just feel alone because people don't often share this kind of thing. Nice to realise that it's more common than we knew.
Load More Replies...
crazy_cat_notAlady 5 years ago
I'm bipolar and I have chronic depression. I have had this since I was a kid. I have been singled out by my "friends" for being too easily offended. I have been called the "offense queen", "very jovially" of course, and by a friend who's a mental health professional, nonetheless. I have received treatment and therapy, and come a long way since then. I don't remember feeling rsd in the recent past. but as a result of it, now I hate hanging out with friends, I don't want to make new friends or trust new people, I hate traveling, I hate holding meaningful conversations about topics I like, I dislike spending time away from home and my comfort zone altogether. Human psychology is complex. Mental health is not a joke. If one doesn't understand why or what a person is going through, it's better to remain quiet that dispense judgment and labels.
Erin Kavik 5 years ago
This is another of the symptoms that crosses between ADHD and Autism. The two share several crossover symptoms that often means that misdiagnoses between the two are all too common and people aren't getting the help they need - I was misdiagnosed with ADHD for nine years until a nurse finally realised that I was actually Autistic and missing most of the ADHD-specific symptoms.
Jessica butts 2 years ago
I have both but my mom didn't want to have me treated because I was doing ok academically. I wish I could go back in time because I have suffered so much.
Load More Replies...
Danielle Wigger 5 years ago
i have ADHD, and it really makes me feel out of place. i always feel so weird.😞
Fixin'Ta 5 years ago (edited)
This is my life. And I just found out about it a few months ago (along with a diagnosis of ADHD) in my late 50s. There is nothing so amazing as finding out that you're not just a fecked-up failure of a human, but you actually have a DIFFERENT BRAIN structure than "neurotypical" people. (People with ADHD, people who are on the autism spectrum and those with a few other brain-structure-related issues are being called "neurodiverse" or "neurodivergent" these days, and I kinda like that. I never did like being "typical" anything.) It's such a relief to be able to say, "Oh, I'm RSD-ing right now, it's just how my brain works," rather than, "Oh, my gosh, I just did something horrible and now everyone hates me and wishes I would disappear, even though I don't really know what I just did, or maybe I do but it wasn't that big a deal, or so I thought, but I must have been wrong and I have ruined all these relationships just by existing and what am I supposed to do now, I think I'll just curl up in a ball and die."
Kathryn Baylis 5 years ago (edited)
To compound this, there are so many callous and insensitive people out there who are unnecessarily rough on people when they talk to them (even worse when there’s a power imbalance involved). One must bear in mind that not everyone gets your “jokes”, it’s not always appropriate to be flippant (especially to someone in authority—-yikes!), and there are plenty of sensitive people—-as well as people with RSD—-who will take what you say literally and be hurt by it. Even someone who usually just rolls with it could be unusually sensitive in that moment. We should, as a society, start training ourselves to be more understanding of the context of another person’s condition, or simply their walk of life, which shapes how they perceive not only what you’re saying, but how you’re saying it. You might think you’re being hilarious or looking cool or tough, but to them you’re just being mean and a real asshole.
Jessica butts 2 years ago
Yes, and going after people because they are sensitive is abuse/bullying. I hate it.
Load More Replies... Joonscrab 5 years ago
I have ADHD And Anxiety... The combo feels great ....I just don't know if what I feel is due to Anxiety or adhd sometimes lmfao..
Load More Replies... Nikki Sevven 5 years ago
Wait...this is a thing? It has a name? OMG, I thought it was just random anxiety. The feeling is awful, as if your heart just dropped into your gut. As if the multi-channel intrusive thoughts, spotify on infinite repeat, can't remember anything for a second, and bored with everything but fidgety stuff wasn't enough.
Mimi M 5 years ago
That's the first time I've heard of rejection-sensitivity being described as an ADHD symptom. It's usually mentioned as a symptom of depression (esp. atypical depression) and/or social-anxiety.
Dark Empress 4 years ago
Consider atypical depression normally has to do with dopamine vs major depression which is more serotonin related and it actually makes a lot of sense.
Load More Replies... RavenClaw 5 years ago (edited)
I have adhd and autism i feel this ..but it depends .. with my parents it doesnt effect me like that .. but with friends and outside family it can get arkward and tiring and feels like your going into a pit that you can never escape and your mind gets foggy ..and for people without it imagine your doing a test that never ends and every question get harder
Ericka s 5 years ago
I didn't know this had a name or that other people went through it. I just thought I was a shitty, awkward person that wasn't good at anything.
Carrie Laughs 5 years ago
The one thing I have learned is that we're never alone - there are 1000s of us shitty, awkward people, whether there is a reason or a condition causing it or not. We just feel alone because people don't often share this kind of thing. Nice to realise that it's more common than we knew.
Load More Replies... crazy_cat_notAlady 5 years ago
I'm bipolar and I have chronic depression. I have had this since I was a kid. I have been singled out by my "friends" for being too easily offended. I have been called the "offense queen", "very jovially" of course, and by a friend who's a mental health professional, nonetheless. I have received treatment and therapy, and come a long way since then. I don't remember feeling rsd in the recent past. but as a result of it, now I hate hanging out with friends, I don't want to make new friends or trust new people, I hate traveling, I hate holding meaningful conversations about topics I like, I dislike spending time away from home and my comfort zone altogether. Human psychology is complex. Mental health is not a joke. If one doesn't understand why or what a person is going through, it's better to remain quiet that dispense judgment and labels.
Erin Kavik 5 years ago
This is another of the symptoms that crosses between ADHD and Autism. The two share several crossover symptoms that often means that misdiagnoses between the two are all too common and people aren't getting the help they need - I was misdiagnosed with ADHD for nine years until a nurse finally realised that I was actually Autistic and missing most of the ADHD-specific symptoms.
Jessica butts 2 years ago
I have both but my mom didn't want to have me treated because I was doing ok academically. I wish I could go back in time because I have suffered so much.
Load More Replies... Danielle Wigger 5 years ago
i have ADHD, and it really makes me feel out of place. i always feel so weird.😞
Fixin'Ta 5 years ago (edited)
This is my life. And I just found out about it a few months ago (along with a diagnosis of ADHD) in my late 50s. There is nothing so amazing as finding out that you're not just a fecked-up failure of a human, but you actually have a DIFFERENT BRAIN structure than "neurotypical" people. (People with ADHD, people who are on the autism spectrum and those with a few other brain-structure-related issues are being called "neurodiverse" or "neurodivergent" these days, and I kinda like that. I never did like being "typical" anything.) It's such a relief to be able to say, "Oh, I'm RSD-ing right now, it's just how my brain works," rather than, "Oh, my gosh, I just did something horrible and now everyone hates me and wishes I would disappear, even though I don't really know what I just did, or maybe I do but it wasn't that big a deal, or so I thought, but I must have been wrong and I have ruined all these relationships just by existing and what am I supposed to do now, I think I'll just curl up in a ball and die."
Kathryn Baylis 5 years ago (edited)
To compound this, there are so many callous and insensitive people out there who are unnecessarily rough on people when they talk to them (even worse when there’s a power imbalance involved). One must bear in mind that not everyone gets your “jokes”, it’s not always appropriate to be flippant (especially to someone in authority—-yikes!), and there are plenty of sensitive people—-as well as people with RSD—-who will take what you say literally and be hurt by it. Even someone who usually just rolls with it could be unusually sensitive in that moment. We should, as a society, start training ourselves to be more understanding of the context of another person’s condition, or simply their walk of life, which shapes how they perceive not only what you’re saying, but how you’re saying it. You might think you’re being hilarious or looking cool or tough, but to them you’re just being mean and a real asshole.
Jessica butts 2 years ago
Yes, and going after people because they are sensitive is abuse/bullying. I hate it.
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