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“I Thought You Were The Dad”: 57 Women Share The Most Unhinged Ways They Practice Micro Feminism
We may be living in more progressive times where gender equality is getting more attention, but society itself is still largely patriarchal. There remain power imbalances that favor men, and many people still uphold traditions that put women in a second tier.
So, as a way to stand up to the system, these people are sharing how they incorporate microfeminism into their daily lives. Yes, many of their actions will ruffle some feathers, but they are intent on making a statement, even in their own little ways.
These came from a recent Threads post that grew traction, and you will see why as you read through.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
Anytime someone says “the US team could win this year!” (In regards to the World Cup), I say haven't we won like 4 times? And when they say no i say “oh you must be talking about the men's team”
RELATED:
#2
When a dad brings his kid into our clinic and doesn’t know their DOB or why they’re there I casually laugh and say “oh my bad I thought you were the Dad, sorry!” You should see their faces 🤭
#3
I’m a nurse and I say, “Your body, your choice” to male patients every opportunity I can.
Male patient doesn’t want medicine…”Your body, your choice.”
Male patient says they want to leave AMA…”Your body, your choice.”
The list goes on…😂
#5
I don’t flick off men in traffic, I give them a thumbs down. It creates disappointment vibes instead of anger. Many are really surprised 😳
#6
I interrupt interrupters in meetings a la “Hang on just a second, Gary. I think we should finish hearing what Cathy had to say.”
Roman Arendt 1 week ago
That's just good manners. And it would be the the responsibility of the person calling the meeting to do so, regardless of the gender of the interrupter/interruptee.
#7
When someone says “he helps with the kids,” I say, “You mean he parents his children?”
Joe Russo 6 days ago (edited)
I stayed at home with our first born here in Greece. Was shocked to have women telling me I was a good helper...for my wife. I would have loved to have someone speak up. I sort of spluttered out , "I'm the dad." But I was so not ready to hear that the first time. Nor the woman who cried and told me, "My husband can't make tea." And I stopped from saying, "give him a cup, some water, a tea bag, and a kettle and....wait to see what happens." And yes of course I'm blaming the huge patriarchy of the last...few thousand years in Greece.
#8
I don’t move out of the way of men. I just stop in my tracks and wait for them to go around.
Recently at the grocery store a man crashed into my grocery cart because I stopped instead of moved and I guess he was that confident that I was going to haul my big old cart out of his way that he literally walked right into it.
Oh and my favorite way to address an angry man is to tell them there is no need to be so emotional. They hate that.
#9
Not supporting cruel to women religions even if my opinion is not popular and ppl will block me everywhere
#10
I try to actively use the word “women” for anyone 18 and older instead of “girls.” Guys are automatically “men” in print and elsewhere when they turn 18 (and even younger). We deserve the same respect.
#11
if my delivery person is a woman, i wait for her to get inside her car and drive off before i go back upstairs.
#12
Using the term "workforce" instead of "manpower", human kind instead of "man kind". Language goes a long way.
SM 6 days ago
The English language definitely has it shortcomings for "neutral gender". I guess that isn't an accident though, given what men have always thought of the role of women should be throughout the history. It is good that people are trying to correct that even if my old mind has some problems adjusting at times. 😉
#13
My husband and I are both Veteran's. But whenever we're asked "Who's the Veteran?" My husband always says "she is."
#14
Anytime any man Tries to refer to any other man in any sport as the greatest athlete of blah blah blah, I mention Serena Williams, as in “yeah, but he’s no Serena Williams”
#15
When building a healthcare related website I made sure all the doctor stock photos were women doctors.
#16
Replacing 'Sorry to bother you' with 'Thank you for your time' or 'Thanks for your patience' in emails. It subtly shifts the dynamic from apologizing for occupying space to assuming mutual professional respect
Becky Samuel 1 week ago
The way women use language in a business setting is far more apologetic, self-deprecating and passive than the way that men in similar positions do. We are so used to this infantilising nonsense that we don't even recognise the pattern. If a woman uses the same language as a man she gets called 'bossy', 'bi tchy' etc.
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#17
Always correcting a man when he uses the word “female” instead of “woman”.
Kristiina Männiste 1 week ago (edited)
As is right. (in Estonian the word "female" is only used for animals, and even then for animals that you consider lower than yourself. Bor example a dog is a "female dog" but a bear is a "mother bear" and a tiger is a "mother tiger"). It might be different for english, but calling a woman "a female" in Estonia equals calling her a piece of cattle.
#18
Whenever a woman apologizes to me for “being in the way”, for instance if I say excuse me in a grocery store and they say sorry, I always tell them “Girl, never apologize for taking up space. We do that way too often as women.” most of the time I get a response of something like, “You know what?! You’re right!” It’s like my fun, little, feminism pass it on game!
marianne eliza 6 days ago
If I have to "excuse me" in a store because some thoughtless person is standing in the middle instead of to one side, I expect the person to apologize for being so unaware of other people and inconveniencing those around them.
#19
I’m a teacher and whenever I need to move something I ask if any of my strong girls can help
Shingo Murata 1 week ago
When I (a man) worked in some big company once, the ratio was 1 male - 5 females there. and whenever the paper on the copy machine or fax ran out, they always ask a man to go get some. and I always asked, why always the man, a woman can carry one stack of paper also. and the female manager always got upset. I was ahead of my time. it was 1997
#20
I don't stop talking when someone talks over me. Sometimes I put my hand up as I finish. Then I politely yield the floor to the interrupter.
Michael Largey 1 week ago
Me, too. If they persist, I shoot them a look and say "I'm not done yet" and continue. Never reward bad behavior.
#21
Very micro but I recently sent out our wedding invitations and I made sure to put the woman’s name first on the envelopes.
Tabitha 1 week ago (edited)
My husband and I own our own pest control business. He’s the talent (25 years in the business he really knows his stuff) and I run the office. Whenever we have a residential account for a couple, I always put the woman’s name first. Especially when I primarily deal with her to make arrangements for payment—-most of the time when I get the man on the phone, he puts the woman on to give me the credit card number anyway! I have no idea where the stereotype came from of women not being able to handle finances, because when getting payments from most of our married customers, the woman is the one who can give me the CC number, or is the one whose name is on the checks they send in. Rarely is it the man who does that—-and the ones who are divorced or widowed are clueless and need to be taught how to keep their bills paid. Oh, and the vast majority of women are decidedly not spendthrifts. Because their men are the ones who throw money around like it grows on trees—-and in the biggest and most expensive ways to boot. Any man who says his wife spends too much money is hiding the fact that, while she may splurge and buy steaks for them to eat once in a while, HE is the one blowing money on the ridiculous huge gas-guzzling truck or whatever, that he thinks will make him look like a manly man, without realizing that, though it might impress the other guys, women will immediately know he’s just trying to compensate for his tiny d**k.
#22
I’m a public accountant. I put the woman down as “taxpayer” and the husband down as “spouse” for every new client that is filing a married filing joint return.
#23
When I create a survey, Female always goes before Male. It’s alphabetical order.
#24
If a man seems insistent on cutting me off or walking ahead of me, I stop and say “after you, princess”
#25
I ask men if they work outside the home
And also ask “if you’re here then who is taking care of your kids?”
Related to both: Ask how they balance work and fatherhood
Michael Largey 1 week ago
With the spread of working from home, the point of these questions might become less obvious. If only it made them less necessary.
#26
I ask men to take notes during meetings.
#27
I've decided to use "cute top" instead of "nice shirt"
nicholas nolan 1 week ago
lol, well it'd be a compliment, if a little weirdly phrased. Those are rare.
#28
Male populated not male dominated field “Being a ____ is a male populated field”
They don’t dominate
#29
i’m a passport agent. no matter what, i’m putting moms name above dads on a child’s passport application so mom has to sign above dad. extra sparkle points if the dad is “running” the appointment.
#30
I work in healthcare + insurance and I refuse to use the terms husband or wife. "Partner" across the board. You'd be surprised how many straights get offended
Tobias Reaper 1 week ago
i do the same thing partner is more appropriate unless they specifically refer to their partner as husband or wife
#31
Today, in a meeting, I said “You would be grandmothered in”, instead of “grandfathered in”
#32
We need the lady architects to always put the women’s bathroom first in the hallway of every restaurant.
Michael Largey 1 week ago
I've always assumed that they put the women's bathroom further down the hall to make room for the line.
#33
Asking expectant fathers if they’re going part time when baby arrives
#34
Everytime I'm arguing with a man I always remain calm and indifferent. When he starts taking things personally or showing he's minimally nervous, I say he's too emotional right now and we can talk again later, when he's feeling calmer.
If he starts shouting, I say he's "too hysterical".
#35
feminism just means we want to be equal. so I like to point out when we don't have equal representation on boards, as CEOs, as founders, as VC, as famous chefs, etc.
#36
I intentionally sought out female medical professionals, leaders, mentors, etc for my two boys. Now they’re bamboozled when they see a men in high achieving professions. Once they had a male resident pediatrician.
Mouths agape, 6 asked “boys can be doctors too?!?!”
Me: “I guess bro, but they have to work like SUPER hard.”
Beak Hookage 1 week ago
This reminds me of a riddle. A man and his son get into an accident. When they arrive at the hospital the doctor comes to examine the son and says "I cannot treat this patient; he is my child". How is this possible? Some people instantly get it because well DUH, but others tie themselves in knots because it doesn't occur to them that the doctor might be a woman and therefore the child's MOTHER.
#37
PCP here. I always discuss evidence for/against prostate exams at an annual. Present the evidence. Then say, “your body, your choice”, to drive home why bodily autonomy is important. Also call the dad’s with results from kiddos testing, etc. This may be a controversial one. When the heterosexual male is in my office with his wife/GF, and she attempts to speak for him, I tell her “Ma’am, you may not always feel well to attend. It would be a disadvantage to him to not learn to answer for himself.”
nicholas nolan 1 week ago
Oh, do not do that second one. Please. Unless you have strong concerns there is a***e occuring and that's why they're speaking for the other person. Some people have a terrible time advocating for themselves at the doctor. I am convinced my dad is d**d because of this. He could not handle blood draws, and was unable to function leading up to and for some time after a draw. The doc he had before he died pretty much bulldozed my mom every time she opened her mouth with concerns he wasn't able to articulate. His "little" symptoms were cancer. The cancer that k****d him. Also, let's circle around to the first part. There is no "evidence" against a prostate exam. You're gonna f*****g k**l somebody.
#38
* Every time a man tries to skip the line, i say "it's ok, let the weak go first".
* Every time when men get triggered by healthy feminism, i say "girls, let's not oppress the vulnerable".
#39
When men post shirtless pics I report them for nudity.
SkyBlueandBlack 1 week ago
As someone who used to handle such reports at MySpace, please know you're only annoying underpaid wage slaves.
#40
I noticed men more often say they live by themselves, and women say they live alone, and I didn’t like that people may errantly conflate “alone” and “lonely,” so now I write “by herself” instead of “alone” so women’s aloneness doesn’t get viewed as loneliness more easily than men’s.
#41
I once called a tiger a 'male tigress'. My father was deeply offended.
Kristiina Männiste 1 week ago
Luckily male and female tigers are both just called tiger in Estonia. If we wish to specify the gender we have to say "father tiger" or "mother tiger". We are very fond of the great grand total of three tigers that live in our country (in Tallinn Zoo).
#42
As a college student, I-
•assume all doctors and all professors are female until proven otherwise.
• Whenever I need to name off professionals in a field (like science) I name women first.
• question everything and do not stop kids from questioning everything
• do not smile at or be polite to men until given a good reason (like introductions or the door being held open)
I’m also a business minor so that’s pretty microfeminising in & of its self 😌
#43
I decided female is the standard gender for things, unless proven otherwise. For ex, if i see a spider or bird or any creature idk the gender of, its a she.
Crystalwitch60 1 week ago
Actually tbh I do as well unless I know it’s a he, ie black birds males are black females brown etc, spiders females have large carpaces males small ones easy to see (i kept tarantulas for decades) butterflies tad harder so mostly she .cows she, bulls he n so on n so forth ,
#44
You know how everyone who owns power tools ends up with one brand-family that they stick to? (DeWalt, Makita, Ryobi, etc)
Well you are now a “___”-girly.
“Oh yeah my dad’s always been a DeWalt-girly too”
It brings a lot of fun to the conversation.
highwaycrossingfrog 1 week ago
I agree that conversations about power tools generally do need more fun injecting into them. I'm just not sure this is an effective method.
#45
I make travel arrangements and when it is wife/husband traveling together, I book everything in the wife's name from the car to the hotel. And I always put her name first in the email when I say "Hi [insert wife's name] and [insert husband's name]
highwaycrossingfrog 1 week ago
I was pretty annoyed when my partner (male) and I (female) went on holiday last year. I had done all the booking, my name was first on all the paperwork, etc., and when we were met by our driver, arrived at the hotel, and were greeted by the travel agency rep they all addressed my partner first.
#46
I’m a law student. In my notes, if I’m writing something positive, I use ‘her’ but for example I’m writing about a criminal or anything vile, I use ‘him’ 😂
#47
I found a few online:
Always assuming the professional is a woman, like if someone says they've been to the doctor lately, and you assume the doctor is a lady and ask, oh what did she say/do
Starting speeches with women and children of women.
Always referring to someone as miss, even if you know she's married, only exception is Dr.
Kristiina Männiste 1 week ago
In my country most of the medical professionals are women. A standard medical doctor for an Estonian is a no nonsense woman with short curled hair and a white coat. Anything else is a deviation from norm.
#48
When a kid gets hurt or is unwell and I am the one who has to make the call (I'm a teacher), you bet your bum I'm calling dad. Every time.
#49
Not moving out of the way when you’re walking by men is elite but also just loudly taking up space anywhere feels good
Eileen Ryan 1 week ago
Bobcat, I think you need to get out more. Maybe touch grass or take a walk by the beach, you seem inordinately mad about these posts. Perhaps you should take a break from the internet.
#50
I call the World Cup from this year the Men's World Cup and the one for next year (when the women play) the real World Cup
#51
one of my favorites is, whenever a man makes you laugh, turning to the closest girl and saying "See? Men can be funny after all!"
Roxy222uk 1 week ago
Some if us are old enough to remember very well debates about whether women could be funny on national radio; with men in the comedy industry arguing that no one wants to laugh at a woman. So this doesn’t come out of nowhere, although it’s a bit harsh on any guy that has never thought women couldn’t be funny. Unless done with a sparkle that makes it funny to everyone. BTW, I eventually worked out that a lot of men don’t want to laugh with/a women because it’s a real bøner kîller, and we all know what they think the only reason for women existing is.
#52
i ONLY use scrub mommies
highwaycrossingfrog 1 week ago
Because only women should do the cleaning? If we're gendering sponges (and I do own a scrub daddy) isn't it more micro feminist to scrub using the male version? Let's make the men remove the dirt!
#53
I do an Uno reverse on the country music radio standard of only playing one song by a woman per hour. When my phone is connected to the work truck Bluetooth, the whole crew is going to be listening to 98% women, trans, and non-binary musicians for the whole drive to the work site. They have to put in requests if they want to hear a straight white man sing.
#54
“Ladies and their creation”
#55
When I spell things on the phone, I don’t use any male names for the letters. F like Francesca, L like Lucy, M like Michelle.
I also don’t watch men’s sports anymore. I only watch women’s sports. It’s literally the best. Women are amazing.
#56
I always ask men to repeat what they said, I can’t ever “hear” them the first time.
nicholas nolan 1 week ago
That would make me feel better, actually. I've got some hearing damage that makes the higher registers harder to hear. I feel awful not being able to hear people with higher pitches clearly unless I'm reading their lips a little.
#57
I tell men that they’d be more attractive if they smiled, and when they do, I say, “I guess it doesn’t work all the time.”
What do you think ?
Senjo Krane 1 week ago
Many of these are just reverse mysongyny. These attitudes don't help to create a harmonious world.
Zebulun 6 days ago
Absolutely! A lot of these pissed me off. And I'm a liberal cis-female!!!!
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Lukas (fuck/transphobes) 1 week ago
Some of these are good- not moving when a man expects you to move for him, adjusting language to be less male-forward (though I think it's better to move towards gender-neutral language rather than either gender). But some of these were cruel. Why would you mock someone for their appearance just because they're a man? Or berate them for making you laugh? Feminism is about equality. We as a culture will never get anywhere by being petty and trying to put men down for being men- just as men should not put down women just for being women. We are all humans, first and foremost, and leading with respect does the most good for all of us.
Spencers slave no more 1 week ago (edited)
A lot of these are not "micro feminisms", they are downright b1tchy and completely unnecessary power plays. If men did this, these same women would complain about "male aggression".
Ann Deluty 5 days ago
Micro feminism is not very effective because men are not very aware and can't hear anything but b**bs.
LtKernelPanic 6 days ago
Wow. Reverse the genders and everyone would be decrying them as sexist but once again it's just BP ripping on men. Most of these are just so called "feminists" being aholes.
FluffyDreg 1 week ago
To be fair... a lot of this list was just bullying.
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nicholas nolan 1 week ago
I would, but that one woman said I had a gross smile.
Load More Replies... Senjo Krane 1 week ago
Many of these are just reverse mysongyny. These attitudes don't help to create a harmonious world.
Zebulun 6 days ago
Absolutely! A lot of these pissed me off. And I'm a liberal cis-female!!!!
Load More Replies... Lukas (fuck/transphobes) 1 week ago
Some of these are good- not moving when a man expects you to move for him, adjusting language to be less male-forward (though I think it's better to move towards gender-neutral language rather than either gender). But some of these were cruel. Why would you mock someone for their appearance just because they're a man? Or berate them for making you laugh? Feminism is about equality. We as a culture will never get anywhere by being petty and trying to put men down for being men- just as men should not put down women just for being women. We are all humans, first and foremost, and leading with respect does the most good for all of us.
Spencers slave no more 1 week ago (edited)
A lot of these are not "micro feminisms", they are downright b1tchy and completely unnecessary power plays. If men did this, these same women would complain about "male aggression".
Ann Deluty 5 days ago
Micro feminism is not very effective because men are not very aware and can't hear anything but b**bs.
LtKernelPanic 6 days ago
Wow. Reverse the genders and everyone would be decrying them as sexist but once again it's just BP ripping on men. Most of these are just so called "feminists" being aholes.
FluffyDreg 1 week ago
To be fair... a lot of this list was just bullying.
Load More Replies... nicholas nolan 1 week ago
I would, but that one woman said I had a gross smile.
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