“I Didn’t Know I Was Engaged To A Child”: Woman Refuses To Make Her Future SIL A Bridesmaid

Marriage is a celebration of love, meant to be shared with the people who uplift and support you, not those who tear you down. That’s why this Redditor carefully chose her bridesmaids from her closest friends.

But her fiancé had other ideas, insisting she include his sister in the lineup. On its own, that might not seem unreasonable—except his sister had a long history of being cruel to the bride. Understandably, she wasn’t on board. Her fiancé, however, refused to accept her decision and responded with a full-blown tantrum.

Read the full story below.

The groom insisted his fiancée replace one of her bridesmaids with his sister

Bridesmaids in pink dresses holding bouquets, reflecting wedding themes.

Image credits: freepik (not the actual image)

Despite her history of belittling and body-shaming the bride

Text discussing a woman questioning her wedding choices after conflict with her fiancé over his sister's role.

Text describing a woman's experience of dress shopping with a critical sister-in-law.

Woman in wedding dress being helped with buttons, questions wedding after fiancé sides with sister.

Image credits: freepic.diller (not the actual image)

Text about a woman's concerns over wedding due to fiancé's dismissive attitude towards sister's bullying behavior.

Text exchanges reveal tensions over bridesmaid choices with fiancé and sister.

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Fiancé arguing with woman on a couch about wedding concerns, appearing upset in a modern living room.

Image credits: Drazen Zigic (not the actual image)

Text discussing a woman questioning her wedding due to fiancé siding with his sister, who bullies her.

Wedding conflict text: Fiancé storms off after argument over sister's involvement; woman questions relationship.

Text discussing a woman questioning her wedding after fiancé sides with his bullying sister, leading to doubts and conflict.

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Most newlyweds admit they would change something about their wedding

When we think about our wedding day, we tend to imagine it in the grandest terms: the happiest, the most special, the most unforgettable moment of our lives.

But the days leading up to it can be a whirlwind of stress. Planning every detail—venue, outfits, catering, guest list, music—all while trying to keep both families happy and impress friends can quickly drain the joy out of the experience. By the time the celebration arrives, some couples find themselves wondering if they even like how it all turned out.

In fact, a staggering 76% of newlyweds married in or after 2010 say there are things they would have done differently, and 43% admit they have regrets about some aspects of their wedding, according to a survey by Dana Rebecca Designs.

Most couples agreed they should have spent more on their honeymoon, rings, and photographer and less on the dress and invitations. Nearly half of those surveyed wished they had enjoyed the day more, while 28% regretted how much they spent, and 20% even regretted the guest list.

Set clear boundaries for the big day if you want to enjoy it, says expert

With so much effort, time, and money poured into weddings, couples deserve to be surrounded by people who support them and bring joy to this important milestone. Making that a reality, however, isn’t always easy.

To get some expert advice, Bored Panda spoke with Clarissa Donohue, an alternative wedding planner and founder of Grace In Spring Weddings, based in Manchester, UK, about how to create a wedding that truly feels right for the couple.

“I believe weddings should reflect the couple’s relationship,” Donohue tells us. “The wedding party (bridesmaids, groomsmen, etc.) should ideally consist of those who have provided significant support throughout the couple’s journey. If that doesn’t include family members, that’s perfectly acceptable; it’s the couple’s choice. Wedding planning is stressful enough without adding difficult family dynamics into the mix.”

One of the best ways to prevent unnecessary drama is to establish boundaries from the start.

“If couples anticipate difficulties with family members during planning, establishing clear boundaries—both for themselves and others—can be helpful,” Donohue explains. This might include sharing only essential updates, resisting pressure to make decisions that don’t align with the couple’s wishes, and regularly checking in with each other to stay united.

For more serious issues like racism or homophobia, she says couples may even choose to leave certain family members off the guest list entirely. “Weddings should be about celebrating love and positivity, not placating those with opposing views,” she notes.

Amid all the preparations and expectations, Donohue reminds couples to prioritize their well-being. Taking breaks, de-stressing when needed, and gathering close friends for a wedding rant (“that’s always my fave!”) can help keep things in perspective.

And if you still can’t shake off the nerves about how the wedding will go, here’s some reassurance: 90% of couples say that despite any hiccups, the good outweighed the bad. Nearly 60% felt they truly enjoyed their wedding day, and 72% said it was one of the best days of their lives.

So, get excited about marrying your favorite person, but don’t compromise on what you need to be happy. After all, this day is about the two of you, not just keeping everyone else content.

Some readers agreed the woman should stand her ground

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Comment by Timesup21 about a woman questioning her wedding due to fiancé siding with his bullying sister.

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While others thought she should compromise and include his sister

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Comment about wedding with 5 downvotes: "Yta, she better be a bridesmaid.

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After reading the responses, the woman later revealed that she had called off the wedding

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