“I Feel So Uncomfortable Now”: Woman Can’t Look At Her Friend The Same After Rude Messages

Specific topics are off-limits to discuss in social situations due to their sensitivity. These typically include a person’s political or religious leanings and their income. 

But in some cases, discussions about weight can be just as touchy. This was proven true between two childhood friends when one of them offered the other a suggestion: “Join Weight Watchers and start working out.” 

The woman on the receiving end of these comments didn’t take them well, and as a result, she began to rethink their friendship.

For some people, weight can be a sensitive subject matter to talk about

Two women joyfully hugging outside, capturing the moment a woman sees her good friend after many years.

Image credits: A. C. / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

Such discussions became a problem between two childhood friends

Woman sees good friend after 7 years, experiencing hurtful comments about her weight during their reunion conversation.

Text on screen about a woman told to lose weight by a good friend after 7 years, mentioning Weight Watchers and health concerns.

Text from a personal story describing being told to lose weight by a good friend after 7 years, including workout and diet links.

Woman sitting in chair focused on phone, reflecting on weight loss and reconnecting with good friend after years apart

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The author revealed some of her struggles, explaining why the comments affected her that much

Text about a woman explaining her weight struggles and being told to lose weight by a good friend after many years.

Text expressing feeling humiliated and judged after a good friend told her to lose weight unexpectedly.

Text excerpt showing a woman reflecting on spending time with a good friend who silently judged her body after 7 years apart.

Text excerpt discussing a woman feeling her friendship changed after seeing a good friend and being told to lose weight.

Woman sitting indoors looking down, appearing upset after being told to lose weight by a good friend.

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She hasn’t spoken to her friend, whose comments had a profound effect

Woman sees good friend after years, feels uncomfortable after being told to lose weight during their reunion.

Text showing feelings after seeing a good friend who told her to lose weight, lowering her self-esteem and causing anxiety.

Text post with woman sharing feelings after seeing a good friend after 7 years and being told to lose weight.

Image credits: LittleMermaidRose

Person standing barefoot on a white digital weight scale, highlighting themes of weight loss and measurement.

Image credits: i yunmai / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

Weight discussions are always tied to a person’s self-worth

Despite her efforts to keep healthy, the author nonetheless felt hurt and blindsided when her friend suddenly brought up her weight. Her reaction is understandable because, according to many experts, any discussion about weight automatically triggers a person’s sense of self-worth. 

As the Milken Institute of Public Health explains, the person may feel shame or perceive themselves as a failure. Some are concerned about being judged by peers or even their healthcare providers.

“Many people experience struggles with weight or accepting their body type, so it is crucial to approach all conversations about weight with empathy and sensitivity,” sports and performance psychologist Dr. Haley Perlus told Reader’s Digest. 

Dr. Perlus adds that blindly offering diet advice can be annoying for the person receiving it, because what works for one person may not work for another. More importantly, she notes that even well-intentioned comments may come across as judgmental, which was what the author felt. 

However, are such statements enough to sever ties with a friend? According to licensed psychotherapist Kaytee Gillis, LCSW-BACS, a few good reasons would be if the person does not respect your boundaries or if they don’t accept you for who you are. 

“Our friends should accept who we are and provide a safe space for us to be ourselves. If you do not feel wholeheartedly accepted, this friendship is likely not genuine or safe,” Gillis wrote. 

The author mentioned that she no longer saw the friendship as a safe space for her, which might be a good reason for her to reconsider the relationship. However, she also mentioned that her friend was “feeling badly” about what happened. 

Before considering ending the friendship, she may want to have an honest conversation with her friend, whom she has known since they were children. It would be the best course of action as supposedly mature adults.

Many people in the comments sided with the author

Text post from user purpleme12 sharing feelings after seeing a good friend who told her to lose weight.

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Alt text: Online comment discussing concern about a friend's weight and suggesting consulting a doctor for a healthy weight check.

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Alt text: Text discussing lack of empathy around weight issues and the impact on friendships after many years.

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Alt text: Woman reunited with good friend after years, receiving honest advice about weight loss and health improvements.

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The woman provided more information to her story

Woman in a green shirt standing by a window, looking thoughtful, reflecting on a reunion with a good friend after years.

Image credits: shurkin_son / freepik (not the actual photo)

Text showing a woman expressing concern about losing a long-term friendship after being told to lose weight.

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ALT text: Text about woman seeing good friend after 7 years and being told to lose weight without asking or mentioning it.

Text excerpt about self-esteem and personal growth after seeing a good friend and receiving weight-related comments.

Text expressing feeling hurt after a good friend told woman to lose weight, impacting her personal growth.

Woman in athletic wear standing in front of mirror, reflecting on weight and body image in a sunlit room.

Image credits: MART PRODUCTION / Pexels (not the actual photo) 

She also spoke more candidly about her insecurities

Woman sees good friend after 7 years and faces hurtful comments about her weight and appearance.

Text message discussing feeling mortified about food choices around a good friend after seeing her following 7 years.

Woman reflects on weight change after seeing good friend, discussing efforts to lose weight with healthy habits and exercise.

Woman sees good friend after 7 years, feels hurt after being told to lose weight during reunion conversation

Image credits: LittleMermaidRose

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