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Woman Talks On The Importance Of Body Autonomy By Sharing Her Mom’s Experience With A Misogynist Doctor
‘Choice’ is a word that comes up frequently when discussing gender equality. A woman’s right to choose if she wants to work or stay at home, what she wears or the most hot button topic of all – choice over her reproductive and abortion rights. Body autonomy is something that men take for granted, but when you have people making laws or even health care specialists standing in your way, it is something that women cannot choose to ignore. Recently one woman tweeted out a thread telling the story of her mother, who had to battle some serious unwanted pregnancy risks all because she wasn’t given the right to choose.
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Online user Salome Strangelove, a lyricist and poet, began the thread on her mother by sharing that even she hadn’t heard the heartbreaking medical care saga until she was almost 40-years-old.
The author and all of her siblings were a surprise to her young mother, writing, “I was an unplanned pregnancy. She didn’t plan any of her pregnancies, in fact, but she was unaware that her birth control was frequently being rendered ineffective by medication.”
For this reason, doctors should always ask their patients if they are taking any other medications. Medicines contain an enzyme called the P450 system which helps process hormones in birth control such as the pill, patch and the ring. However, other medicines can intervene by breaking up the hormones too fast – resulting in pregnancy.
Following the traumatic ordeal of giving birth, her mother asked if she could get a tubal ligation “her tubes tied” to prevent further risking her health with another pregnancy: “Tubal ligation is a surgical procedure that permanently closes or blocks your fallopian tubes.”
And while her doctor’s response may seem inappropriate and outdated, this is still a battle that women are fighting every day. In the U.S women ages, 21 and above have the right to this procedure, but they must sign a form, wait 30 days, and even with these steps, a doctor can still refuse.
According to a report from the Henry J. Kaiser Family Foundation: “Most states with a Family Planning waiver or SPA also cover the procedures for women, but there are exceptions. Ohio and Oregon do not cover tubal ligation (neither general nor post-partum) in their family planning programs. Connecticut, Georgia, Missouri, and Mississippi do not cover tubal ligation performed post-partum in their family planning programs, with Georgia noting that pregnant women are not enrolled in the state’s family planning waiver.”
It was not until the delivery of her brother that she was able to meet with another doctor about her request, “she did so in fear for her life convinced her next pregnancy might actually kill her.”
The young doctor was outraged at the previous medical care she had received and realized that her health issues went even deeper than she knew.
According to ACOG Committee on Ethics Opinion, Sterilization of Women, Including Those With Mental Disabilities there should be a system in place to prevent this type of medical negligence.
“Sterilization, like any other surgical procedure, must be carried out under the general ethical principles of respect for autonomy, beneficence, and justice. …The physician who objects to a patient’s request for sterilization solely as a matter of conscience must inform the patient that sterilization services may be available elsewhere and should refer the patient to another caregiver. …”
Out of 100 women who have a sterilization procedure each year, less than one may become pregnant.
Other women responded by sharing theirs and those they knew experiences of medical resistance
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What do you think ?
Renny 6 years ago
I have a lot of migraines due to misalignment in my back but I occasionally will have them because of my birth control too. I brought this up to my chiropractor who went into this whole discussion about how horrible birth control is and then essentially telling me it's my purpose as a woman to have children. He's no longer my chiropractor.
Aunt Messy 6 years ago
Not to mention that if you have back problems, getting pregnant would probably only make it worse.
Load More Replies...
Elizabeth 6 years ago
Anytime anyone male or female wants to be permanently rendered sterile doctors should just do it!!!!! Whether they already have kids or not! We have medicine, we know about germs, we don't need to work so hard at keeping the human race going. There are already too many of us.
Nela Rothenbach 6 years ago (edited)
Wish l could upvote your last sentence a hundred times. That's what l say when ever someone asks me why I don't want children.
Load More Replies...
Casandra Nițescu 6 years ago
Unfortunately, this problem exists here as well, Lingon. I've heard many stories of swedish women who have to fight super hard to get sterilized. The arguments from doctors are all the same. "you're too young." "You'll change your mind" "you only have one child, you'll want a second one." "you only have two children, you'll want a third one" etc etc. It's ridiculous.
Load More Replies...
Lizard Queen 6 years ago
I had menstrual issues for years. I saw 6 different doctors over a period of 22 years. They said the same thing: I just needed hormone pills. I dutifully took the ineffective pills. I became anemic from blood loss. Not one dr ever suggested hysterectomy: they all wanted me fertile, because I had no children. Dr 7 was different: he *listened.* I had a hysterectomy, and the pathologist found precancerous cells on my cervix. Drs 1-6 risked my life for breeding potential. Dr 7 respected my body autonomy.
Renee Gauthier 6 years ago
I was going through menopause & having extremely heavy periods. They wanted to cauterize my uterus. They started me on iron pills in the meantime because I was anemic. I had no problem with the cauterization, but after taking iron, my period stopped. I stopped taking the iron after about a month & never went for the cauterization. My period came back, I started taking iron again & it went away again. I took iron for about 6 months after that, & my period never came back. When I Googled, I found that anemia can cause heavy bleeding. I already knew that heavy bleeding could cause anemia. Catch-22. If I hadn't lucked out on the iron, I would have had a procedure that I didn't even need. You would think the first treatment they would try would be the iron, I'm sure a procedure makes them more money.
Load More Replies...
ravina nimje 6 years ago
In India its still the same case. They still think husband or doctor should take such decision for the women.
Alexandru Bucur 6 years ago
Ah man, that made me angry beyond words. Religion and medicine SHOULD NOT MIX. I have someone quite close to me who is trans, but long before he realised that, he was struggling with gender dysphoria and suicidal ideation so he went to a doctor who correctly diagnosed it as such and then refused to do anything about it, because the doctor was an Orthodox Christian and it was "against the will of God"... In the end my friend had to emigrate to another country to get the care that he needed.
Sage Jay 6 years ago
I totally understand that... it's going to be hell for me when I want top surgery, being genderqueer and all 🙄 Doctors are fine with breast reductions as long as you don't mention the word 'trans'. Then they're suddenly worried about your 'permanent decisions' or some b******t
Load More Replies...
Marie Anne 6 years ago
In 2016, following the birth of my second child and being 35 yrs old, I begged my ob/gyn for a tubal. SHE refused. I trusted her through 2 very difficult pregnancies and deliveries. I had many health issues, some related to my pregnancy and some not. I never went back to her for follow up care. 2016.
Maci Wilcox 6 years ago
Aren't there laws that protect women who are in this situation? And if so, why aren't they being strictly enforced? Sorry for my ignorance, I'm in middle school and just recently started getting involved in politics and government.
D-m Keilman 6 years ago
Sadly there aren't. I had a classmate that never wanted kids. She while on birth control had three kids by 21. She begged for her tubes tied. Doc said no because she was too young. She didn't want the kids that she already had...had two more in the next 4 years. Finally he "allowed" her to get it done. Keep involved in politics. Keep informed. I don't care what direction you lean, just be part of the world you live in.
Load More Replies...
Kjorn 6 years ago
my grandmother's mother got 12 or 13 child. and the last one almost killed her. the Church men still coming home and tell her to get more kids. her husband just throw him out. many religious men have no concern whatsoever.
Slune 6 years ago
Let the clerics get through the same issues like the women! What are this ignorant. Pedophiles thinking, Playing god? ......or devil? Care about your massive problems !
Load More Replies...
Carmen Elena 6 years ago
If a doctor asked me "what if you change your mind?" I´d say "well, it would be MY f... problem, don´t you think?" My niece is 18yo and she says she doesn´t want to have children in the future. She wants to work, travel and have free time to do whatever the hell she wants. And I support her. Will she change her mind? Maybe, maybe not. The things is: It´s up to her, nobody else. Her decision, her life.
Sage Jay 6 years ago
yeah, people don't disallow people from getting tattoos because 'what if you change your mind!" They understand that it's permanent, but go along anyway.
Load More Replies...
Renny 6 years ago
I have a lot of migraines due to misalignment in my back but I occasionally will have them because of my birth control too. I brought this up to my chiropractor who went into this whole discussion about how horrible birth control is and then essentially telling me it's my purpose as a woman to have children. He's no longer my chiropractor.
Aunt Messy 6 years ago
Not to mention that if you have back problems, getting pregnant would probably only make it worse.
Load More Replies... Elizabeth 6 years ago
Anytime anyone male or female wants to be permanently rendered sterile doctors should just do it!!!!! Whether they already have kids or not! We have medicine, we know about germs, we don't need to work so hard at keeping the human race going. There are already too many of us.
Nela Rothenbach 6 years ago (edited)
Wish l could upvote your last sentence a hundred times. That's what l say when ever someone asks me why I don't want children.
Load More Replies... Casandra Nițescu 6 years ago
Unfortunately, this problem exists here as well, Lingon. I've heard many stories of swedish women who have to fight super hard to get sterilized. The arguments from doctors are all the same. "you're too young." "You'll change your mind" "you only have one child, you'll want a second one." "you only have two children, you'll want a third one" etc etc. It's ridiculous.
Load More Replies... Lizard Queen 6 years ago
I had menstrual issues for years. I saw 6 different doctors over a period of 22 years. They said the same thing: I just needed hormone pills. I dutifully took the ineffective pills. I became anemic from blood loss. Not one dr ever suggested hysterectomy: they all wanted me fertile, because I had no children. Dr 7 was different: he *listened.* I had a hysterectomy, and the pathologist found precancerous cells on my cervix. Drs 1-6 risked my life for breeding potential. Dr 7 respected my body autonomy.
Renee Gauthier 6 years ago
I was going through menopause & having extremely heavy periods. They wanted to cauterize my uterus. They started me on iron pills in the meantime because I was anemic. I had no problem with the cauterization, but after taking iron, my period stopped. I stopped taking the iron after about a month & never went for the cauterization. My period came back, I started taking iron again & it went away again. I took iron for about 6 months after that, & my period never came back. When I Googled, I found that anemia can cause heavy bleeding. I already knew that heavy bleeding could cause anemia. Catch-22. If I hadn't lucked out on the iron, I would have had a procedure that I didn't even need. You would think the first treatment they would try would be the iron, I'm sure a procedure makes them more money.
Load More Replies... ravina nimje 6 years ago
In India its still the same case. They still think husband or doctor should take such decision for the women.
Alexandru Bucur 6 years ago
Ah man, that made me angry beyond words. Religion and medicine SHOULD NOT MIX. I have someone quite close to me who is trans, but long before he realised that, he was struggling with gender dysphoria and suicidal ideation so he went to a doctor who correctly diagnosed it as such and then refused to do anything about it, because the doctor was an Orthodox Christian and it was "against the will of God"... In the end my friend had to emigrate to another country to get the care that he needed.
Sage Jay 6 years ago
I totally understand that... it's going to be hell for me when I want top surgery, being genderqueer and all 🙄 Doctors are fine with breast reductions as long as you don't mention the word 'trans'. Then they're suddenly worried about your 'permanent decisions' or some b******t
Load More Replies... Marie Anne 6 years ago
In 2016, following the birth of my second child and being 35 yrs old, I begged my ob/gyn for a tubal. SHE refused. I trusted her through 2 very difficult pregnancies and deliveries. I had many health issues, some related to my pregnancy and some not. I never went back to her for follow up care. 2016.
Maci Wilcox 6 years ago
Aren't there laws that protect women who are in this situation? And if so, why aren't they being strictly enforced? Sorry for my ignorance, I'm in middle school and just recently started getting involved in politics and government.
D-m Keilman 6 years ago
Sadly there aren't. I had a classmate that never wanted kids. She while on birth control had three kids by 21. She begged for her tubes tied. Doc said no because she was too young. She didn't want the kids that she already had...had two more in the next 4 years. Finally he "allowed" her to get it done. Keep involved in politics. Keep informed. I don't care what direction you lean, just be part of the world you live in.
Load More Replies... Kjorn 6 years ago
my grandmother's mother got 12 or 13 child. and the last one almost killed her. the Church men still coming home and tell her to get more kids. her husband just throw him out. many religious men have no concern whatsoever.
Slune 6 years ago
Let the clerics get through the same issues like the women! What are this ignorant. Pedophiles thinking, Playing god? ......or devil? Care about your massive problems !
Load More Replies... Carmen Elena 6 years ago
If a doctor asked me "what if you change your mind?" I´d say "well, it would be MY f... problem, don´t you think?" My niece is 18yo and she says she doesn´t want to have children in the future. She wants to work, travel and have free time to do whatever the hell she wants. And I support her. Will she change her mind? Maybe, maybe not. The things is: It´s up to her, nobody else. Her decision, her life.
Sage Jay 6 years ago
yeah, people don't disallow people from getting tattoos because 'what if you change your mind!" They understand that it's permanent, but go along anyway.
Load More Replies...
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