Wife Confronts Husband After Finding His Christmas Gift List And Discovering Hers Is The Cheapest Of The Bunch
It’s the thought behind the gift, not how much it cost that should matter. Though, at the same time, the actual price of the present can reveal how much you matter to a loved one… especially if you also know how much they’re shelling out for their friends and colleagues.
One redditor, who goes by the username u/MerryChristmasAA, shared how she found out what her husband got for her for Xmas this year. She also uncovered all of the gifts that he bought for everyone else. And the difference between them, at least financially, was very vast. One thing led to another and the couple got into a huge argument.
The wife got called “an ungrateful, spoiled brat” and turned to the AITA subreddit for a verdict on who was right and wrong in this situation. Scroll down for the full story, dear Pandas. And when you’re done reading, let us know in the comments who you think was being a jerk in this situation.
A couple got into a heated argument over Christmas presents
Image credits: Ketut Subiyanto (not the actual photo)
The wife was very upset that her husband spent tons of money on his friends this Xmas but didn’t respect her enough to do the same for her
The redditor shared how her husband got her a $20 spoon set, all the while getting lavish and expensive gifts for his friends and coworkers. Overall, he spent over $5,000 on these presents. Naturally, the love of his life got upset that she was regarded as inferior to everyone else. She was also mad that she spent quite a lot of time, effort, and money planning all of her gifts for him.
The story got over 17.3k upvotes in two days on the AITA online community. Most readers thought that the husband was clearly at fault here and that the wife’s reaction was fine.
Whoever was right or wrong, nobody enjoys arguing with their partner. Relationship expert Alex Scot explained to me earlier that couples need to get past the so-called “post-argument hangover” and reconnect. Physical closeness, playfulness, as well as having time to yourself from time to time can all be ways to improve the relationship when things are getting rocky.
“I recommend physical touch in the form of a hug or a 6-second kiss, the reason for this is co-regulation,” the expert told Bored Panda.
“[Co-regulation is] how we self soothe as infants; a baby cries and a caregiver comes to cuddle and soothe the baby. As adults, co-regulation is very powerful and something we can use to our advantage. So even though you may not feel like hugging or kissing your partner post-argument, as soon as you can bring yourself to do so, go for it. Your nervous system will thank you as it regulates with your partner’s nervous system by sensing their heart rate and breathing,” she went into more detail.
Alex also noted that she believes the old adage that ‘absence makes the heart grow fonder’ is also something that we should keep in mind. We need some time alone in our day-to-day lives.
“When we take time to ourselves, we are meeting our own needs, feeling autonomous, and it allows us time to miss our partner. Without regular alone time within our relationships, we can become drained and even resentful,” she explained to Bored Panda.
“For some reason, we step into adulthood, get into long-term relationships and believe we must ‘adult’ now and get serious, which leads us to denying ourselves of playtime. To get that spark back, go do something new together, play a game together, or revisit a nostalgic spot or activity.”
Here’s how people reacted when they learned the husband got his wife such a cheap gift
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I'll bet that the gifts are really for himself, and he's calling them gifts for co-workers as an excuse. I mean, who spends that much on co workers? Not unless you're having affairs with all of them.
He’s gaslighting her about it too. So there are even deeper issues. I’d cancel Christmas. It’d be totally fine if they were poor and could only afford $10-30 worth of Christmas gifts. But clearly he’s not if he’s dropping $600 on a watch for a coworker. He knows what he’s doing. And he has a malicious reason. I’d donate or return all of his gifts and just get him the matching cup set. And start planning what will happen when that blows up too and the marriage is at stake. Maybe gift him marriage counseling instead of the matching cups.
Yes, THIS. Control-freaks and/or abusers almost ALWAYS also have control/abuse issues with money and their partner's spending. This is especially prevalent in men (though not exclusive to) because they are (still) often the greater breadwinner and (historically) root their masculinity into providing for the family. This woman needs to run far and fast.
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I would wonder if the guy isn't closeted. It's just weird to spend so much money on "friends". Or he's just a total jerk that didn't grow up from his frat boys years, and still considers that his "bros" are more important than... his wife. She should get a divorce that's a big red flag. Not mentioning that no husband should gift his wife a house appliance (unless she asked for it) we're not in the 50s anymore.
I'll bet that the gifts are really for himself, and he's calling them gifts for co-workers as an excuse. I mean, who spends that much on co workers? Not unless you're having affairs with all of them.
He’s gaslighting her about it too. So there are even deeper issues. I’d cancel Christmas. It’d be totally fine if they were poor and could only afford $10-30 worth of Christmas gifts. But clearly he’s not if he’s dropping $600 on a watch for a coworker. He knows what he’s doing. And he has a malicious reason. I’d donate or return all of his gifts and just get him the matching cup set. And start planning what will happen when that blows up too and the marriage is at stake. Maybe gift him marriage counseling instead of the matching cups.
Yes, THIS. Control-freaks and/or abusers almost ALWAYS also have control/abuse issues with money and their partner's spending. This is especially prevalent in men (though not exclusive to) because they are (still) often the greater breadwinner and (historically) root their masculinity into providing for the family. This woman needs to run far and fast.
Load More Replies... I would wonder if the guy isn't closeted. It's just weird to spend so much money on "friends". Or he's just a total jerk that didn't grow up from his frat boys years, and still considers that his "bros" are more important than... his wife. She should get a divorce that's a big red flag. Not mentioning that no husband should gift his wife a house appliance (unless she asked for it) we're not in the 50s anymore.
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