Man Despises The Name Wife Loves For Their Baby, Asks For Help Online As She Won’t Budge
Interview With Expert
Naming children is usually one of the fun things that come with becoming a mother or a father. But if the ideas of what the child should be called clash too strongly, it can just as quickly become a battleground for parents’ opinions, turning pleasantness into frustration.
One good example is a recent story of a man who got into a heavy argument with his wife, who was set on naming their future daughter after “Clytemnestra,” a character from Greek mythology with a pretty dark and tragic story that may not be to everyone’s, and certainly not the husband’s, liking. Scroll down to read the full story!
More info: Slate
The process of naming a child is something that can go from fun into frustrating in a flash, especially if the partners have radically different ideas
Image credits: Heiner (not the actual photo)
A Greek immigrant and a mythology lover learned that they were expecting a baby girl and started looking for a name
Image credits: Afif Ramdhasuma (not the actual photo)
The woman proposed to call their daughter Clytemnestra, which the man thought was indecent because of how the mythological character of the same name is portrayed
Image credits: Greek Tragedy
The man explained his reasons and proposed other options, but the couple didn’t manage to find a compromise
The author began by explaining that he’s a second-generation Greek immigrant married to a classical mythology lover. But while he knew their children would have a strong chance of being named after mythology characters, he never expected that one of those names would be “Clytemnestra.”
This started a very severe argument between the married couple. While the woman was set on going with the name she chose, he felt exactly the opposite, saying that it was a bad name and he hadn’t heard of anybody being named that.
According to him, in the mythology, Clytemnestra was a “skank” who murdered her husband as he was about to learn of her affair. He argued that even though hardly anyone would recognize the name well enough to tease their daughter over it, many better and more reputable alternatives in the mythology could be used instead of this one.
The naming situation was left at a stalemate, with both parents refusing to compromise. Thus, the man came online looking for solutions.
The commenters were divided. Some agreed with the author, saying that the name is odd and, at the very least, difficult to write or pronounce. But at the same time, others defended the mother’s choice, saying that it was a decent name and no one would know the meaning anyway.
Few even bashed the poster over his ignorance, as while Oresteia‘s Clytemnestra was closer to how the man described her, in the Odyssey, she was actually portrayed as a strong, independent, and quick-witted character, defying the female gender role stereotypes and conventions.
Image credits: Jelleke Vanooteghem (not the actual photo)
A person’s name is a very important part of their identity, and therefore, naming a child is a much bigger responsibility than some people realize. But to find out just how much that really means, Bored Panda reached out to Nick Hatter, who is a Therapeutic Life Coach and the author of The 7 Questions: The Ultimate Toolkit to Boost Self-Esteem, Unlock Your Potential and Transform Your Life.
The expert started by explaining that rare names, like Clytemnestra, can have a significant negative impact on a child’s life, especially while growing up. “Unusual names could make children a target for bullying at school – and bullying can have a drastic and lasting effect on self-esteem and confidence, as well as increased stress and anxiety.”
But while it may be unnecessarily difficult to grow up with such a name, it’s not impossible to overcome these challenges. Nick suggested a couple of trauma reduction techniques, such as Rewind and EMDR, as well as shame reduction techniques that, under the care of a suitably trained professional, could help take out the emotional charge from any lasting memories caused by bullying.
Alternatively, a person dealing with this could try to flip the situation by owning and reframing it, looking at their name not as unusual but as unique. “Of course, a solution-focused approach might be to just have a legal name change to a sensible first name,” said the expert.
Image credits: Kelly Sikkema (not the actual photo)
But like everywhere else, you can always find both pluses and minuses. Nick explained that a unique name can be a great talking point when dating, making you more interesting and memorable.
The expert also shared that while 20 years ago it might’ve been beneficial to change your name to better fit the society around you, as he had to do it himself, nowadays, “Having an unusual or foreign-sounding name could potentially benefit job and university applicants, seeing as many large western corporations and universities respectively are actively looking to increase (or fulfill) diversity targets.”
Lastly, Nick referenced a study from 1978 in which, out of 116 participants with unusual names, women scored significantly higher on Capacity for Sociability, Social Presence, Self-Acceptance, and Psychological Mindedness. So, if the girl from the story ends up being named Clytemnestra, at the very least, she’ll have an advantage in this field.
Ultimately, naming someone shouldn’t be taken lightly. While giving a child a unique name isn’t necessarily bad, this kind of decision can strongly impact their life, so the choice should be considered thoroughly. But in the end, the decision is up to the parents, and all we can really do is hope that no matter what name will be given to the girl in question, she’ll turn out great!
What did you think of this story? Do you know any unusual names and stories about them you’d like to share? The comment section is waiting for you!
People in the comments were divided, with some agreeing that this name is a bad idea and others defending it and badmouthing the poster
Poll Question
Thanks! Check out the results:
Subscribe to Access
Exclusive Polls
By entering your email and clicking Subscribe, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. You are also agreeing to our Privacy Policy.
Thank you! You've successfully subscribed to newsletters!
You May Also Like
Woman Refuses To Chip In For Babysitting Because She Doesn’t Even Have Kids, Asks If She’s A Jerk
Do you think childless individuals should be expected to chip in for group babysitting costs during friend gatherings?
17 Y.O. Is Done Sharing Her Birthday With Her Late Twin, Parents Are Not Having It
Do you think the girl should be allowed to celebrate her birthday without the remembrance of her deceased twin?
"They can always shorten it". Yeah, let me know how that works out for Clitty.
I thought exactly the same. This is not a good name simply because that's what it sounds like when shortened.
Load More Replies...
Was about to write the same thing when I saw your post. Yup, naming the kid Clytemnestra is a pretty much guaranteed road to teen suicide.
Load More Replies...
No one will be able to pronounce it and middle school girls will rip it apart with variations of clıt and menstrual.
Clytemnestra's story can be interpreted in positive, empowering ways, but I think that's rather beside the point. It sounds like a treatment cream for a vaginal infection. And the poor kids going to end up getting called either Clitoris or Chlamydia. Greek mythology and history does have some amazing feminist heroines. Or swing into Anatolia and go with something like Xiomara. Bullying causes lifelong neurological and psychological damage. Don't set your kid up for it.
Does she know it's most likely the root word for chlamydia? Naming your daughter after an STI probably isn't the best idea.
You've awoken the nerd in me, and I'm frantically searching my linguistics resources to find out if it is the root word now.
Load More Replies...
When it comes to naming children (assuming both parents are in it together), before you get to the names that sound ridiculous, or have strange/inappropriate meanings, there is a single fundamental rule -YOU HAVE TO AGREE ON THE NAME. That doesn't mean instant dismissal once one partner doesn't like a name - after all, people can be talked round after discussing it. What it does mean that if your partner is absolutely 100% against it, to the point where you're having a huge fight over it, it is a lost cause, and you need to pick a different name.
Thank you! I had to scroll a long way to find someone who'd answered the actual question. OP didn't ask the internet what everyone else thinks of the name, he asked how to resolve the deadlock because he already knows what HE thinks of the name, which is exactly 50% of what matters (the other 50% being what his wife thinks of it). He hates it, case closed, it gets crossed off the list. Disappointing for his wife of course, but that's how it works. Both parents need to agree on a name. They also can't choose one that only HE likes but she hates. Simple.
Load More Replies...
The mythological connotations are going to be the least of the child's worries...
Load More Replies...
She also murdered him because he sacrificed Iphigenia, their daughter, to appease Artemis since she was keeping the army away from Troy.
And in other supplemental sources... murdered ger first husband and ripped her infant son out of her hands smashing him on the ground.
Load More Replies...
What's wrong with Alcyone, Calypso or Persephone? Even if mispronounced, I doubt it would be worse than anything Clytemnestra-related, specifically the first 4 alphabets. Sorry not sorry, but I have to call out OP's wife for that. Please save your little girl a future of misery by name-association.
I won't say it's a name choice anyone should use since it's so unusual and hard to pronounce and she may be teased, but for a second generation greek, this guy knows nothing about his own countries mythology. Or rather, he's choosing to miss out on the fact that Agamemnon murdered Clytemnestras first husband and infant son, raped her, and forced her to marry him, then later used her daughter as a sacrifice. I think I'd want to murder that bastard, too.
It sounds more like an infection that happens during a period. She could have gone with Athena, Penelope or Hera
Wife can want it all she wants, the name of the child should be mutual decision.
As someone with a strange name myself, I can guarantee you some of the names. She will be called Chlamydia, Clit, menstration...
Years ago I brought my 18-month-old daughter home from daycare, sat her down and told her we were going to have another baby. Obviously, we didn't know the gender at the time. Our toddler smiled and said, "Oh, her name is Audrey." We never found out where she may have heard that name - even after quizzing the daycare, family, and friends and checking the baby tv shows she watched. Then, seven months later Audrey Leigh was born (she's a 31-year-old hospice nurse now).
This is a horrible name, regardless of the connotation in mythology. I can't even say it's better than any of the "Tragedeigh" names. It's too long, it's hard to pronounce, and she will hate you until the day she's old enough to change it.
How is this even a debate, if your partner hates a name for whatever reason then it should be off the table. Growing the baby inside you doesn't mean you get to call every single shot about the kid. - signed somebody who carried 2 of them and had lengthy debates with my partner until we agreed on acceptable names
God I hope they don't end up naming her that! No one will know how to say it and she's going to get teased mercilessly.
Where's @troufaki13, have you ever heard of someone in modern day Greece called Clytemnestra?
Sounds like an STD, to be honest. At least the couple is of greek descent, so there is some kind of "right" for them to use it. Not like a white north german being called "Shaquille". Also, could be worse, like a made up name, backwards dad's name or just a few letters.
Most people won't even know the history of the name; they will just think it is an ugly sounding word. And it is.
It's hard to find a name in Greek mythology that doesn't have some negative or downright tragic connotations. I like Pandora, Antigone, Briseis, Artemis and Persephone
There are very few names that have no tragedy attached to them. If there's not a historical connotation, there's a modern murd3r victim or a serial ki((er with that name. Take Chiomara. On the one hand, we can see her as a tragic figure who was kidnapped and assaulted during a war, and then felt she had to placate her husband by bringing home her assailant's severed head and telling hubby "only one man who has known me lives" so he didn't feel like someone infringed upon his property. Or we can see her as a woman taking what agency she could in a time where she had very little, taking justice into her own hands and enacting vengeance for herself. I like to think that after she brought the dude's head back home, her husband realized his wife was one amazing bada**, and he had the skull bronzed and made into a drinking vessel for her.
Load More Replies... 
Someone unironically called the education system "extremely lacking" because it doesn't teach Greek mythology as a core subject. LMAO I've read the Odyssey many times and was obsessed with Greek Mythology as a kid and I don't recognize the name Clytemnestra. That may say more about me but it's ridiculous to expect people, in general, to know that name and it's mythology and use that as an indictment of general education. FOH
That is just an awful and ugly sounding name. Is chlymidia also on the table?
People in the above comments say that the husband is controlling, What about the wife who has chosen a name on her own and won't budge from it? Now tell me who is controlling. Every marriage is a partnership and sometimes you need to meet on common ground. They should choose a name for the child they both like. With Clytemnestra, this girl is going to spend her entire life pronouncing and spelling it for everyone. Why don't they just give her a very common, popular name like Raevonleigh?
I practically guarantee the poor kid will get called "Chlamydia" when she starts school.
She's not gonna like the nickname options. Or how people twist that in middle school.
This is terrible name. Your kids going to be called chlamydia in middle school. Good luck with that
Honestly, bullies find a reason, so the name doesn’t necessarily make a difference. That being said, it’s not a very common name and even then, it’s a middle name. Something like a child’s name should be agreed upon by BOTH parents. Why not a more modern Greek name? Eleni(Helena) is a good one. Irini, Stephanie and Tiffany are Greek names.
It’s an awkward, clunky name. You don’t want to give your child a name that everyone will stumble over when they read, say “pardon?” every time you say it, or mangle the pronunciation of when they say it.
She's the badass who killed the m**********r who lured her daughter to the Greek camp to murder her there - sacrifice her to appease a deity that was angry about a sin HE committed. Only because otherwise he would have to give away the position of leader of the Greek army. Clytemnestra is a great character, and his comment shows that he either doesn't know his own culture, or that he is a sexist a**e. The only reason I would not recommend that name because of the incels out there who would have a go at the girl because of the first syllable of her name.
Most of the names he suggested are difficult to pronounce and will set the kid up for failure.
"They can always shorten it". Yeah, let me know how that works out for Clitty.
I thought exactly the same. This is not a good name simply because that's what it sounds like when shortened.
Load More Replies... Was about to write the same thing when I saw your post. Yup, naming the kid Clytemnestra is a pretty much guaranteed road to teen suicide.
Load More Replies... No one will be able to pronounce it and middle school girls will rip it apart with variations of clıt and menstrual.
Clytemnestra's story can be interpreted in positive, empowering ways, but I think that's rather beside the point. It sounds like a treatment cream for a vaginal infection. And the poor kids going to end up getting called either Clitoris or Chlamydia. Greek mythology and history does have some amazing feminist heroines. Or swing into Anatolia and go with something like Xiomara. Bullying causes lifelong neurological and psychological damage. Don't set your kid up for it.
Does she know it's most likely the root word for chlamydia? Naming your daughter after an STI probably isn't the best idea.
You've awoken the nerd in me, and I'm frantically searching my linguistics resources to find out if it is the root word now.
Load More Replies... When it comes to naming children (assuming both parents are in it together), before you get to the names that sound ridiculous, or have strange/inappropriate meanings, there is a single fundamental rule -YOU HAVE TO AGREE ON THE NAME. That doesn't mean instant dismissal once one partner doesn't like a name - after all, people can be talked round after discussing it. What it does mean that if your partner is absolutely 100% against it, to the point where you're having a huge fight over it, it is a lost cause, and you need to pick a different name.
Thank you! I had to scroll a long way to find someone who'd answered the actual question. OP didn't ask the internet what everyone else thinks of the name, he asked how to resolve the deadlock because he already knows what HE thinks of the name, which is exactly 50% of what matters (the other 50% being what his wife thinks of it). He hates it, case closed, it gets crossed off the list. Disappointing for his wife of course, but that's how it works. Both parents need to agree on a name. They also can't choose one that only HE likes but she hates. Simple.
Load More Replies... The mythological connotations are going to be the least of the child's worries...
Load More Replies... She also murdered him because he sacrificed Iphigenia, their daughter, to appease Artemis since she was keeping the army away from Troy.
And in other supplemental sources... murdered ger first husband and ripped her infant son out of her hands smashing him on the ground.
Load More Replies... What's wrong with Alcyone, Calypso or Persephone? Even if mispronounced, I doubt it would be worse than anything Clytemnestra-related, specifically the first 4 alphabets. Sorry not sorry, but I have to call out OP's wife for that. Please save your little girl a future of misery by name-association.
I won't say it's a name choice anyone should use since it's so unusual and hard to pronounce and she may be teased, but for a second generation greek, this guy knows nothing about his own countries mythology. Or rather, he's choosing to miss out on the fact that Agamemnon murdered Clytemnestras first husband and infant son, raped her, and forced her to marry him, then later used her daughter as a sacrifice. I think I'd want to murder that bastard, too.
It sounds more like an infection that happens during a period. She could have gone with Athena, Penelope or Hera
Wife can want it all she wants, the name of the child should be mutual decision.
As someone with a strange name myself, I can guarantee you some of the names. She will be called Chlamydia, Clit, menstration...
Years ago I brought my 18-month-old daughter home from daycare, sat her down and told her we were going to have another baby. Obviously, we didn't know the gender at the time. Our toddler smiled and said, "Oh, her name is Audrey." We never found out where she may have heard that name - even after quizzing the daycare, family, and friends and checking the baby tv shows she watched. Then, seven months later Audrey Leigh was born (she's a 31-year-old hospice nurse now).
This is a horrible name, regardless of the connotation in mythology. I can't even say it's better than any of the "Tragedeigh" names. It's too long, it's hard to pronounce, and she will hate you until the day she's old enough to change it.
How is this even a debate, if your partner hates a name for whatever reason then it should be off the table. Growing the baby inside you doesn't mean you get to call every single shot about the kid. - signed somebody who carried 2 of them and had lengthy debates with my partner until we agreed on acceptable names
God I hope they don't end up naming her that! No one will know how to say it and she's going to get teased mercilessly.
Where's @troufaki13, have you ever heard of someone in modern day Greece called Clytemnestra?
Sounds like an STD, to be honest. At least the couple is of greek descent, so there is some kind of "right" for them to use it. Not like a white north german being called "Shaquille". Also, could be worse, like a made up name, backwards dad's name or just a few letters.
Most people won't even know the history of the name; they will just think it is an ugly sounding word. And it is.
It's hard to find a name in Greek mythology that doesn't have some negative or downright tragic connotations. I like Pandora, Antigone, Briseis, Artemis and Persephone
There are very few names that have no tragedy attached to them. If there's not a historical connotation, there's a modern murd3r victim or a serial ki((er with that name. Take Chiomara. On the one hand, we can see her as a tragic figure who was kidnapped and assaulted during a war, and then felt she had to placate her husband by bringing home her assailant's severed head and telling hubby "only one man who has known me lives" so he didn't feel like someone infringed upon his property. Or we can see her as a woman taking what agency she could in a time where she had very little, taking justice into her own hands and enacting vengeance for herself. I like to think that after she brought the dude's head back home, her husband realized his wife was one amazing bada**, and he had the skull bronzed and made into a drinking vessel for her.
Load More Replies... Someone unironically called the education system "extremely lacking" because it doesn't teach Greek mythology as a core subject. LMAO I've read the Odyssey many times and was obsessed with Greek Mythology as a kid and I don't recognize the name Clytemnestra. That may say more about me but it's ridiculous to expect people, in general, to know that name and it's mythology and use that as an indictment of general education. FOH
That is just an awful and ugly sounding name. Is chlymidia also on the table?
People in the above comments say that the husband is controlling, What about the wife who has chosen a name on her own and won't budge from it? Now tell me who is controlling. Every marriage is a partnership and sometimes you need to meet on common ground. They should choose a name for the child they both like. With Clytemnestra, this girl is going to spend her entire life pronouncing and spelling it for everyone. Why don't they just give her a very common, popular name like Raevonleigh?
I practically guarantee the poor kid will get called "Chlamydia" when she starts school.
She's not gonna like the nickname options. Or how people twist that in middle school.
This is terrible name. Your kids going to be called chlamydia in middle school. Good luck with that
Honestly, bullies find a reason, so the name doesn’t necessarily make a difference. That being said, it’s not a very common name and even then, it’s a middle name. Something like a child’s name should be agreed upon by BOTH parents. Why not a more modern Greek name? Eleni(Helena) is a good one. Irini, Stephanie and Tiffany are Greek names.
It’s an awkward, clunky name. You don’t want to give your child a name that everyone will stumble over when they read, say “pardon?” every time you say it, or mangle the pronunciation of when they say it.
She's the badass who killed the m**********r who lured her daughter to the Greek camp to murder her there - sacrifice her to appease a deity that was angry about a sin HE committed. Only because otherwise he would have to give away the position of leader of the Greek army. Clytemnestra is a great character, and his comment shows that he either doesn't know his own culture, or that he is a sexist a**e. The only reason I would not recommend that name because of the incels out there who would have a go at the girl because of the first syllable of her name.
Most of the names he suggested are difficult to pronounce and will set the kid up for failure.
25
77