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When someone comes to you with bad news or a problem they are facing it’s a natural reflex for most of us to say something along the lines of “just be positive!” – well, one therapist is here to tell you, this advice is toxic. Nobody wants to be kicked when they are already down so naturally, we think that telling people uplifting mantras about positivity will give them the boost they need, but this is not always the case.

Psychotherapist Whitney Hawkins Goodman, LMFT, owner of The Collaborative Counseling Center, runs an Instagram account called @sitwithwhit where she shared an important chart on the difference between giving someone ‘validation and hope’ versus ‘toxic positivity’ and it’s making waves on the internet.

Psychotherapist Whitney Hawkins Goodman created a chart to educate people on the difference between validation and ‘toxic positivity’ – and it’s going viral

The therapist explained that she found the ‘toxic positivity’ sayings from Pinterest, which can be harmless mantras for some but for people going through a tough time they can have a deeper effect.

Image credits: sitwithwhit

Image credits: sitwithwhit

Image credits: sitwithwhit

Image credits: sitwithwhit

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Image credits: sitwithwhit

Image credits: sitwithwhit

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Image credits: sitwithwhit

Image credits: sitwithwhit

Along with the post Goodman wrote: “I’ve realized people HATE the word toxic. I hear ya’ll. Got a lot of comments on “never give up.” Decided to keep it. There are relationships, life goals, plans and situations that is OK to give up on. Not everything needs to result in completion. Sometimes it is safer to give up. We owe each other the space to discuss the options,” and asked her followers, “What are some other positive sayings that you think are totally dismissive?”

People loved the chart and thought it nailed this very important lesson

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