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Childless Couple Can’t Stand Having Friends’ Unruly Kids Over, Considers Uninviting Them
City legends claim that there are toddlers who don’t make any noise, don’t run around the house when they’re at a party, and don’t turn any family or friendly gathering into complete chaos. Well, that might be true, but I’ve never seen such toddlers in my life. And today’s tale is actually about little kids.
So today we’re going to tell you a story from the user u/Lower_One3014, who, along with her husband, were so unwilling to see the chaos from friends’ kids at the man’s birthday party that they even decided to find a plausible excuse to refuse them an invitation. But let’s take all the things one by one.
More info: Reddit
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The author of the post and her husband are going to celebrate his birthday soon, and want to throw a party with friends
Image credits: Gustavo Fring / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Among these friends there’s a couple with 3 little kids whom the author considers totally unruly
Image credits: Lower_One3014
Image credits: Ivan Samkov / Pexels (not the actual photo)
The kids, the elder of who is 4YO, turn every party to a mess, so the author isn’t happy having them at home again
Image credits: Lower_One3014
Image credits: Timur Weber / Pexels (not the actual photo)
The spouses decided to find a plausible excuse of uninviting either the friends’ kids, or the whole family
Image credits: Lower_One3014
Image credits: Pavel Danilyuk / Pexels (not the actual photo)
The birthday boy himself was told that these spouses aren’t the best guests for him anyway
Image credits: Lower_One3014
The author later told how the situation got solved with the friends attending another party that very day
The Original poster (OP) and her husband will soon be celebrating the man’s birthday, and they invited several of their friends to the party, all from a common group chat. However, literally that evening it turned out that not all of the invitees would be welcome guests. One of the couples in this chat has three small kids (and a fourth on the way) and, according to the author, the relationship between them is, well… strained.
Our heroine says that this couple’s kids (the oldest of them is 4 years old) are “wild,” and after the last party, when the unruly toddlers made a real mess, the spouses have no desire to invite them at all. In addition, according to the OP, the parents themselves are very needy, always asking for help, but at the same time they aren’t eager to help anyone themselves.
The problem was that the invitation was sent to a general chat, where all the friends were, including this couple – and some of them also have children. Quite well-behaved, as the author notes. And now the spouses are faced with a dilemma – either somehow contrive and invite only the parents, asking them to find a daycare for the kids, or again tolerate the mess in their home.
Incidentally, it later turned out that the birthday boy himself was not thrilled with the idea of inviting even the parents from that family. The original poster says that if she had known about this earlier, she would have sent invitations personally to individuals and couples, bypassing that couple. And now she doesn’t know what to do in the current situation.
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
“It all looks a bit confusing, but in any case, the party hosts have the right to invite whoever they want. On the other hand, since the invitation has already been sent, then revoking it doesn’t look very nice,” says Irina Matveeva, a psychologist and certified NLP specialist, whom Bored Panda asked for a comment here. “But retroactively arranging different conditions for participation for different guests is definitely unfair.”
“What could be done is to honestly say that they don’t want the children to misbehave at the party (although many children at that age simply don’t know how to behave any other way…) But in that case, in fact, they can prepare for a complete break in relations with this couple. Simply because it will look incredibly offensive on their part,” Irina concludes.
By the way, there was another option for the march of events – just, as the ancient Eastern wisdom says, “to sit on the river bank and wait until the current carries the body of your enemy past.” And in this situation, it must be admitted, this option actually worked.
At least, the author says that the same couple recently contacted her and said that they would not be able to attend the party because they were invited to their relatives that day. However, it is possible that the couple with kids themselves felt that they weren’t wanted at the birthday party, and refused under a plausible pretext…
Commenters also noted that kids at such a young age are extremely rarely assiduous, and this is quite normal behavior for them. And in general, according to the responders, it looks like the author and her husband simply don’t like this couple, and were just looking for a reason to cancel their invitation. And do you, dear readers, also agree with this?
Image credits: Vlada Karpovich / Pexels (not the actual photo)
People in the comments claimed it wasn’t very polite to uninvite parents because of their kids, and that nearly all the kids of this age are quite the same
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What do you think ?
Romy Rösli 8 months ago
I just don’t get why parents who are already overwhelmed with the kids they have keep making more babies. Ever heard of contraception?
Alexandra 8 months ago
'Kid's doing kid's stuff is normal'. Kids breaking things without parents correcting them and compensating for damages is not normal: that's a lack of parenting. Also, please stop using the word 'distain". It's 'disdain'. Look it up.
Romy Rösli 8 months ago
Exactly! I‘m childfree but I have friends with kids and they always make sure their offspring doesn’t run too wild in other people’s homes. In fact I am sometimes amazed how well behaved some of these kids are.
Load More Replies...
Trillian 8 months ago
Why have a shitload of kids when you don't want to make the effort of actually raising them. They are mostly too young to be "disciplined" whatever that means, it's your job as a parent to keep them occupied and watch they are not breaking things or making a mess.
Betsy S 8 months ago
The definition of the word discipline is "teaching" not punishing. Therefore NO child is ever too young to be taught things. You start the first time they reach for your face and you guide their hand and pat your face gently and say "gentle". You expand it from there. Children should be taught constantly and consistently throughout the day from the day they are born. It's never too early to "discipline" them. It always inappropriate to "punish" them. Luckily that's not what "discipline" means. Imagine if the twelve disciples were called the twelve punishments instead. They were the twelve students/disciples. Discipline means learning, not punishing.
Load More Replies... Romy Rösli 8 months ago
I just don’t get why parents who are already overwhelmed with the kids they have keep making more babies. Ever heard of contraception?
Alexandra 8 months ago
'Kid's doing kid's stuff is normal'. Kids breaking things without parents correcting them and compensating for damages is not normal: that's a lack of parenting. Also, please stop using the word 'distain". It's 'disdain'. Look it up.
Romy Rösli 8 months ago
Exactly! I‘m childfree but I have friends with kids and they always make sure their offspring doesn’t run too wild in other people’s homes. In fact I am sometimes amazed how well behaved some of these kids are.
Load More Replies... Trillian 8 months ago
Why have a shitload of kids when you don't want to make the effort of actually raising them. They are mostly too young to be "disciplined" whatever that means, it's your job as a parent to keep them occupied and watch they are not breaking things or making a mess.
Betsy S 8 months ago
The definition of the word discipline is "teaching" not punishing. Therefore NO child is ever too young to be taught things. You start the first time they reach for your face and you guide their hand and pat your face gently and say "gentle". You expand it from there. Children should be taught constantly and consistently throughout the day from the day they are born. It's never too early to "discipline" them. It always inappropriate to "punish" them. Luckily that's not what "discipline" means. Imagine if the twelve disciples were called the twelve punishments instead. They were the twelve students/disciples. Discipline means learning, not punishing.
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