Not everything in Australia is "upside down". Sure, their Christmas is in the summer and they might have a BBQ to celebrate it, but in some ways, they're just like us Northern Hemisphere folks. Our fascination with bad architecture, for example, is equally obsessive.

Turns out, the Irish, Belgians, and Dutch aren't the only ones shaming their native buildings on Instagram. There's an account called Ugly Melbourne Houses doing precisely the same on the other end of the world.

Taste is universal. I know. But ironically, it's what allows this online project to make fun of the houses it wants to. Here are some of them!

More info: Instagram

#1

Every Time I Try To Build A Custom Sims House

Every Time I Try To Build A Custom Sims House

uglymelbournehouses Report

Ivy
Community Member
6 days ago

That's a lot of roof!

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#2

Amy's Winehouse

Amy's Winehouse

uglymelbournehouses Report

Al Cook
Community Member
6 days ago (edited)

I actually really like that sculpture, it's just not right for THAT particular building.

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Nicholas Reece, deputy lord mayor of Melbourne, thinks the city is actually Australia's most interesting settlement for architecture and design.

"Beginning with the good bones provided by the Hoddle Grid, Melbourne has added some amazing buildings over the decades," Reece wrote. "The city has also produced some brilliant home-grown local architects and has a distinctive design culture, without the overreliance on international 'starchitects' like Sydney."

#3

Perfectly Pitched For A Neighbourhood Near You

Perfectly Pitched For A Neighbourhood Near You

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Michelle M
Community Member
6 days ago

Architect: How do you want your house? Person: Loud!!!

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#4

They Forgot The Plaster Lions

They Forgot The Plaster Lions

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Jayne Kyra
Community Member
6 days ago

When you use the Sims 4 Mansion Baron "Purchase 20 Columns" aspiration in real life.

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#5

When A Friend Doesn't Invite You To Their House And You're Really Quite Relieved About It Actually

When A Friend Doesn't Invite You To Their House And You're Really Quite Relieved About It Actually

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Otter
Community Member
6 days ago

Topiary head is afraid of the Luna Park head.

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However, the deputy lord mayor thinks that Melbourne may have lost its touch in recent years. "[We have] too many towers that are nothing more than spreadsheets in the sky, delivering a profit for developers but leaving the city poorer because of bad design and low-quality materials."

"Too many buildings that are low-grade and bland when newly complete and destined to deteriorate into eyesores over time," Reece continued. "Tall towers that set out to be seen from afar but offer nothing to the pedestrians walking the streets of the city. Featureless glass boxes that could be in any city in the world, rather than a city with the character, style, and sophistication of Melbourne."

#6

How's Everyone's Week Been? Chaotic? Jumbled? Overly Complicated? Yep. Me Too

How's Everyone's Week Been? Chaotic? Jumbled? Overly Complicated? Yep. Me Too

uglymelbournehouses Report

Otter
Community Member
6 days ago

How can anyone relax in or around that place?

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#7

Proudness Doesn't Even Begin To Describe How I'm Feeling After Receiving This Piece Of Moderne Arte Collage In My Inbox

Proudness Doesn't Even Begin To Describe How I'm Feeling After Receiving This Piece Of Moderne Arte Collage In My Inbox

uglymelbournehouses Report

Laly Lynch
Community Member
6 days ago

The princess is in another 'castle'...

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#8

Hang On. Wait... What?! Your Therapist And Your Massive Inflatable Santa Supplier Are The Same Person?!

Hang On. Wait... What?! Your Therapist And Your Massive Inflatable Santa Supplier Are The Same Person?!

uglymelbournehouses Report

Lovin' Life
Community Member
6 days ago

This is awful

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He said the city started noticing its flaws and began drawing a line, saying it must do better. "BHP House on William Street and ICI House in East Melbourne are both over 50 years old. Yet they both still look elegant and modern. They are great examples of how good design holds up and continues to shine over time."

"Melbourne has long been famous for its beautiful shop fronts, especially along Collins and Bourke streets. We need to extend that experience to other quarters of the city," Reece explained.

#9

If Large Cars = Small-Membered Owners, What On Earth Does This Symbolise?

If Large Cars = Small-Membered Owners, What On Earth Does This Symbolise?

uglymelbournehouses Report

Caro Caro
Community Member
6 days ago

Fair Dinkum "please walk around to reach front door you d!ckhead"?

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#10

Picasso's Lovechild

Picasso's Lovechild

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Samantha Lomb
Community Member
6 days ago

There are so few windows. Must be so dark inside if the back isn't all glass

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#11

Barbie's Dream House

Barbie's Dream House

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Samantha Lomb
Community Member
6 days ago

this is cute. not the biggest pink fan but it works with the mid century vibe

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#12

Those Aren't Balconies, They’re Actually Hay Feeders For Giraffes

Those Aren't Balconies, They’re Actually Hay Feeders For Giraffes

uglymelbournehouses Report

Lovin' Life
Community Member
6 days ago

Well I do love giraffes

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He believes that good design is even more critical now if Melbourne is to retain its reputation as a highly attractive and liveable city as it emerges from the COVID-19 pandemic. Reece is also happy that the challenges the city faces aren't too big to solve. At least not yet.

"Melbourne's planning processes are quicker and involve far less red tape compared to other big cities. This is an advantage we need to preserve. But we also need to acknowledge that we need to lift the general standard," he said. I wonder if he follows Ugly Melbourne Houses. Or the person running it...

#13

Colonel Pistachio’s Tudor Turrets Raise Up My Peppermint Helicopter Roller Disco Roundabout

Colonel Pistachio’s Tudor Turrets Raise Up My Peppermint Helicopter Roller Disco Roundabout

uglymelbournehouses Report

Hannah Edwards
Community Member
6 days ago

I don’t mind this half as much as the macMansions and the neoclassical nightmares.

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#14

Caravan Of Courage

Caravan Of Courage

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Otter
Community Member
6 days ago

Someone's upcyclng old house parts!

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#15

Life Is Just About Trying To Do The Very Best You Can Do With The Size Of Window That You Have

Life Is Just About Trying To Do The Very Best You Can Do With The Size Of Window That You Have

uglymelbournehouses Report

Laura Jones
Community Member
6 days ago

looks like a filing cabinet

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#16

Animal Print Is A Neutral

Animal Print Is A Neutral

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Random Panda
Community Member
6 days ago

This one looks fun! It's not something I'd do, but I like looking at it.

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#17

It Looks Like A Shower

It Looks Like A Shower

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October
Community Member
6 days ago

The architect has seen to much Miami Vice.

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#18

Cheeky Brick Butt Cheeks Wrapped In An Oh-So-Saucy Garter Belt Portico

Cheeky Brick Butt Cheeks Wrapped In An Oh-So-Saucy Garter Belt Portico

uglymelbournehouses Report

Lovin' Life
Community Member
6 days ago

I dont know what to say...

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#19

Mary Poppins’ Lsd Dreamland Winky Wonky Summertime Lovin’ Peculiar Palazzo-A-Palooza

Mary Poppins’ Lsd Dreamland Winky Wonky Summertime Lovin’ Peculiar Palazzo-A-Palooza

uglymelbournehouses Report

Vicky Z
Community Member
6 days ago

I'm more concerned of the title

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#20

That’s A Serious Sixpack

That’s A Serious Sixpack

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Rose the Cook
Community Member
6 days ago

This one caused quite a fuss. Neighbours took up a petition to have it removed.

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#21

Intergalactic Evil Mammoth Boxy Square Bonnet Wearing Robot Worm Computer Mansion

Intergalactic Evil Mammoth Boxy Square Bonnet Wearing Robot Worm Computer Mansion

uglymelbournehouses Report

Otter
Community Member
6 days ago

Private home, or Sith kindergarten?

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#22

When It's Only Wednesday But Your Column Just Thinking 'Bout The Weekend

When It's Only Wednesday But Your Column Just Thinking 'Bout The Weekend

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Kona Pake
Community Member
6 days ago

It just wants to crash for the weekend.

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#23

Anyone Got An Id On This LEGO Set?

Anyone Got An Id On This LEGO Set?

uglymelbournehouses Report

Libstak
Community Member
6 days ago

I'm pretty sure that is a childcare centre.

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#24

The Hills Have Eyes

The Hills Have Eyes

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Al Cook
Community Member
6 days ago

That's A LOT of retaining work, wouldn't want to be in one of those in an earthquake!

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#25

Melborgian "Trying To Take Your Underpants Off Without Taking Your Trousers Off First" Robot Moderne

Melborgian "Trying To Take Your Underpants Off Without Taking Your Trousers Off First" Robot Moderne

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Laura Jones
Community Member
6 days ago

those windows would do my head in

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#26

Your Dreams Are Like The Left Half Of This “Balcony”... Totally Pointless And Likely To Result In Horrific Injury If You Dwell On Them For Too Long

Your Dreams Are Like The Left Half Of This “Balcony”... Totally Pointless And Likely To Result In Horrific Injury If You Dwell On Them For Too Long

uglymelbournehouses Report

Hungry Panda
Community Member
6 days ago

Ah the title

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#27

All Roads Lead To Somewhere In South Australia

All Roads Lead To Somewhere In South Australia

uglymelbournehouses Report

Al Cook
Community Member
6 days ago

Well, there are a lot of Greeks here!

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#28

Everybody Who Lives Here Loves Maths

Everybody Who Lives Here Loves Maths

uglymelbournehouses Report

Al Cook
Community Member
6 days ago

That appears to be a piece of cowling repurposed from a 747 engine. Interesting????

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#29

I Think They Could've Squeezed Another One In

I Think They Could've Squeezed Another One In

uglymelbournehouses Report

Persp Gold
Community Member
6 days ago

why have windows. I've heard of privacy hedges, but privacy columns?

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#30

Golden Graytime Jazzercise Spacesuit Jumpsuit Wangle Angle Window Panels A La Clipped Clop Shrubbery-Au-Go-Go

Golden Graytime Jazzercise Spacesuit Jumpsuit Wangle Angle Window Panels A La Clipped Clop Shrubbery-Au-Go-Go

uglymelbournehouses Report

Lily Mae Kitty
Community Member
6 days ago

I love the shrubbery!

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Note: this post originally had 89 images. It’s been shortened to the top 30 images based on user votes.