Woman Is Offended Her Dog Wasn’t Welcome At Brother’s Christmas, Bans His Child From Her New Year’s, Goes Livid When The Brother Doesn’t Come
Not everyone is a dog person, and not everyone is a child person. And that is totally fine! We don’t all want to be taking trips outside every time our dog needs to do its business or dedicating time to changing diapers every few hours. But the important thing is that we respect other people who do want those things. If someone becomes a parent, that’s an incredibly exciting time for them, and all they need is support from their loved ones. And if someone gets a dog, well, that’s an incredibly exciting time too, but they don’t necessarily need to bring it everywhere they go.
But apparently, not everyone understands that a fur baby is not equivalent to an actual baby. One father recently posted on the “Am I the [Jerk]?” subreddit wondering if he was wrong for skipping his sister’s New Year’s celebration because his son was not allowed to attend. Below, you’ll find the full story, as well as some of the responses from invested readers, so you can decide for yourself whether or not he should have made it to the party. Let us know your thoughts on this situation in the comments, and then if you’re interested in checking out another Bored Panda article featuring drama surrounding childfree events, we recommend reading this story next!
After finding out that it would be a childfree celebration, this father decided to skip his sister’s New Year’s party
Image credits: cottonbro studio (not the actual photo)
Now, she’s upset with him for not attending and for refusing to treat her dog like a human being
Image credits: Chewy (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Competitive_Pick5918
I am a textbook dog person. I squeal every time I see a cute one walking down the street, and I can often be found admiring photos of my family’s dog on my phone in my free time. I have no desire to have children and don’t feel much when I see a baby, but I am overwhelmed with an intense sense of longing when I see a cute dog. Diagnosable puppy fever, if you will. However, I am still well aware of the fact that a dog is not a human. A dog can be left at home alone for a few hours and does not need to be constantly tended to. A dog is not related to my family members, so I would never expect them to treat her like one of us. In my home, she is a member of the family, but I cannot require that everyone else treat her the same way. Dogs can take up a huge space in their owners’ hearts, but they are obligated to occupy the same space in everyone else’s.
Sarah Savage wrote an article for Auburn-Opelika Moms discussing this exact topic and noting that no matter how wonderful man’s best friend may be, it is not fair to equate them to babies. “You get a dog from friends, a rescue, a breeder, or maybe your college age child who gets a puppy and then realizes they can’t keep a labradoodle in a dorm room and begs you to just ‘watch him’ for a while. I grew my children in my actual body and carried them for nine months,” she explains.
“I felt them move around in my womb. I had nausea, Braxton Hicks, heartburn, and when I waddled around trying to get some exercise, it felt like I’d been karate kicked directly in the crotch for several hours after,” Sarah writes. “I was super emotional about everything, ate ice cream like it was my whole job, and once sat in a tailgate chair in the garage watching Netflix on my laptop for an hour because I couldn’t stand the smell of dinner. I labored for 15 hours with one, 13 with the other and pushed them out of me with the help of lots of drugs one time and entirely naturally the next. I attached a breast pump—which is really just a benignly named torture device—to my chest every 3 hours around the clock for 5 months to feed my daughter and currently nurse my son whenever and wherever he wants it.”
Of course, not every parent is actually involved in the birth of their child; dads don’t have that option, and plenty of parents adopt or use surrogates nowadays. But the point is that it is a much more intense experience to have, or receive, a child. Unfortunately, however, it’s not always easy to convince our family members to love our children as much as we want them to. Most people are thrilled to become an aunt, uncle or grandparent, but sometimes jealousy and other personal issues just get in the way.
Jealousy is always common between siblings, regardless of their ages, and it seems like in this situation, the woman just wants to receive the same treatment as her brother. His child gets attention, so why shouldn’t hers? The only issue is that by demanding attention, and equal treatment for her dog, she’s being extremely selfish. A dog is a companion, a financial commitment, and a time commitment, but it just can’t be viewed in the same light as a human child. We would love to hear your thoughts on this situation in the comments, pandas, and then if you’re interested in reading another article featuring drama surrounding childfree family occasions, look no further than right here!
Most of the readers agreed that the father did nothing wrong by deciding to skip the party
However, a few people noted that both siblings could have been more mature
As a child free dog owner I can categorically say, Kids and dogs are not the same. Dogs ARE better, but I'm not aware of anyone being allergic to children. At the end of the day, the 'my house my rules' saying applies here. If you don't want dogs in your house, that's fine! If you don't want kids in your house, that's fine too. But don't act like a child about it when someone decides that they don't like your rules and decide not to visit.
While not allergic to children, you are far more likely to catch illnesses from them than dogs! Hardly ever see a friend of mine at the moment as her child is now in nursery and constantly giving her colds etc. Might seem unfair to compare to allergies? My sister is allergic to dogs but when she comes to see me I clean the house thoroughly, wash the dogs thoroughly and she takes her med so it is manageable (she loves dogs too). Wears off as well when she goes home. Of course, reactions DO vary, but allergens that most often cause anaphylactic shock are insect bites or stings, drugs such as vaccinations, peanuts, shellfish, or chemicals like latex. There have been rare, idiopathic, or one-time instances, of anaphylactic shock occurring in humans after physical contact with a dog. However, most allergists do not list anaphylactic shock as a possible allergy symptom of coming into contact with dogs. So, for most it's not going to be that bad and it will go. Unlike some viruses that linger for weeks! Have one right now from my nephew and it turned into a chest infection.
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I will always take offense when ppl won't allow that your dog might feel like your child to you. I have 2 dogs. One is 18 yo and in diapers, and I have to get up several times a night to change him and put him back into his bed under a blanket, or else he cries. The other is 9 and is my world. I work from home, so we're together all day long, and I can honestly say that there have been times that she has been the only thing keeping me going. I don't have children. I don't want any. I have never claimed that I put in as much work with my 'kids' as real moms do. I never wanted that for myself, and that's a conscious decision I made a long time ago. But it doesn't mean I don't have the instinct to love something with the same capacity. I became a little more testy about this subject once my sister had her kid, and began to militantly claim that you can't love a pet like a kid, it's not the same, 'you wouldn't understand', etc. I had to laugh, because in reality she's a deadbeat. Our parents are raising her kid because she can't be bothered. I've changed more diapers than she has.
I feel you. I have a disabled puppy who is about to turn 1 year old. He is neurologically disabled and he will require special care for his entire life. I don't have children, have never wanted them. I have always had animals and I love them more than (most) humans. I currently have two cats as well (6yo and 1yo). My puppy requires a lot of care, just like your golden-years doggo does, and I would not trade my puppy for anything... as I'm sure you feel about your pups as well :) I don't fault other people for thinking children are "more" or "better" than pets, or if they have the mindset to hate hearing the term "furbaby", or if they think I shouldn't love my pets as much as I do. Fine, let them think whatever they want about me. My pets are my everything. I love them and they love me. That's all that matters to me. And you bet your patootie that my pets got Christmas presents from me! XD I hope you and your old boy still have some good times together!
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This is going to get lost, but THERE'S AN UPDATE. Essentially, the sister is very much childfree by choice but massively resents and is jealous of the attention the 2 year old kid gets from OP and her mother (grandma). She extended the childfree rules to other people at the party and they weren't happy with her, but apparently took her word for it that it was OP's fault she had the rule - hence the jerk calling. And the reason for the late notice of nonattendance is exactly as several people pointed out - no available babysitter. This was the case with some other family members who ended up partly forgoing attendence (one parent stayed home) which also contributed to the non-fun atmosphere. So, yeah.
Bit sad to be jealous of a small child! Oh dear.
Load More Replies... As a child free dog owner I can categorically say, Kids and dogs are not the same. Dogs ARE better, but I'm not aware of anyone being allergic to children. At the end of the day, the 'my house my rules' saying applies here. If you don't want dogs in your house, that's fine! If you don't want kids in your house, that's fine too. But don't act like a child about it when someone decides that they don't like your rules and decide not to visit.
While not allergic to children, you are far more likely to catch illnesses from them than dogs! Hardly ever see a friend of mine at the moment as her child is now in nursery and constantly giving her colds etc. Might seem unfair to compare to allergies? My sister is allergic to dogs but when she comes to see me I clean the house thoroughly, wash the dogs thoroughly and she takes her med so it is manageable (she loves dogs too). Wears off as well when she goes home. Of course, reactions DO vary, but allergens that most often cause anaphylactic shock are insect bites or stings, drugs such as vaccinations, peanuts, shellfish, or chemicals like latex. There have been rare, idiopathic, or one-time instances, of anaphylactic shock occurring in humans after physical contact with a dog. However, most allergists do not list anaphylactic shock as a possible allergy symptom of coming into contact with dogs. So, for most it's not going to be that bad and it will go. Unlike some viruses that linger for weeks! Have one right now from my nephew and it turned into a chest infection.
Load More Replies... I will always take offense when ppl won't allow that your dog might feel like your child to you. I have 2 dogs. One is 18 yo and in diapers, and I have to get up several times a night to change him and put him back into his bed under a blanket, or else he cries. The other is 9 and is my world. I work from home, so we're together all day long, and I can honestly say that there have been times that she has been the only thing keeping me going. I don't have children. I don't want any. I have never claimed that I put in as much work with my 'kids' as real moms do. I never wanted that for myself, and that's a conscious decision I made a long time ago. But it doesn't mean I don't have the instinct to love something with the same capacity. I became a little more testy about this subject once my sister had her kid, and began to militantly claim that you can't love a pet like a kid, it's not the same, 'you wouldn't understand', etc. I had to laugh, because in reality she's a deadbeat. Our parents are raising her kid because she can't be bothered. I've changed more diapers than she has.
I feel you. I have a disabled puppy who is about to turn 1 year old. He is neurologically disabled and he will require special care for his entire life. I don't have children, have never wanted them. I have always had animals and I love them more than (most) humans. I currently have two cats as well (6yo and 1yo). My puppy requires a lot of care, just like your golden-years doggo does, and I would not trade my puppy for anything... as I'm sure you feel about your pups as well :) I don't fault other people for thinking children are "more" or "better" than pets, or if they have the mindset to hate hearing the term "furbaby", or if they think I shouldn't love my pets as much as I do. Fine, let them think whatever they want about me. My pets are my everything. I love them and they love me. That's all that matters to me. And you bet your patootie that my pets got Christmas presents from me! XD I hope you and your old boy still have some good times together!
Load More Replies... This is going to get lost, but THERE'S AN UPDATE. Essentially, the sister is very much childfree by choice but massively resents and is jealous of the attention the 2 year old kid gets from OP and her mother (grandma). She extended the childfree rules to other people at the party and they weren't happy with her, but apparently took her word for it that it was OP's fault she had the rule - hence the jerk calling. And the reason for the late notice of nonattendance is exactly as several people pointed out - no available babysitter. This was the case with some other family members who ended up partly forgoing attendence (one parent stayed home) which also contributed to the non-fun atmosphere. So, yeah.
Bit sad to be jealous of a small child! Oh dear.
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