Dad Asks If He Was Wrong For Snapping At His Sister After She Called Him “Creepy And Perverted” For Hugging His Son
Having a good relationship with your family is somewhat of a blessing. Although many parenting philosophies exist, whether it’s the free-range or helicopter kind, family experts agree that kids who have a secure and healthy attachment to their parents have a better chance of developing content relationships with others in their life.
And a 32-year-old single dad who goes by the handle u/illbreakuo seems to be blessed to have such a relationship with his 16-year-old son. Except, his sister doesn’t think it’s particularly healthy.
In a lengthy Reddit post, the dad shared an incident he recently had with his sister who not only questioned his parenting style, but even accused him of being “creepy” for his loving relationship with his son.
Read on for the full incident as written by the dad himself down below, and share whether you think he’s an “AITA for telling my sister that she’s sick and delusional” in the comment section.
A single dad snapped at his sister after she accused him of being “creepy” for hugging his son, and now he’s asking Reddit if his reaction was adequate
Image credits: August de Richelieu (not the actual photo)
Parenting styles and dynamics is a sensitive topic. There’s no universal way one should raise their child and maintain a healthy relationship. But we all want one. After all, being loved and cared about by your parents is something every child needs, and it’s no different in father-son relationships.
But according to Roland C. Warren, a board member of the National Fatherhood Initiative, “too often, fathers think they’re doing a better job in these areas than they really are.” Every parent wants what’s best for their child, and they seemingly put all the effort they can into it, but are they really?
Roland starts with the concept of nurturing. “Nurturing means a lot of things. It certainly includes hugging and kissing our boys on a daily basis and telling them that we love them.” He stressed that “yes, even boys need hugs and kisses,” an idea which angered the sister of the author of this Reddit post so much.
So he shared the whole incident on the AITA subreddit
People weighed in on the incident and shared what they thought of it
But Roland says it’s not only about being affectionate. Nurturing also “includes taking care of their daily needs, like cooking for them, giving them baths, playing with them, reading to them, and helping their mothers.”
Stereotypically, nurturing one’s child is a practice often associated with mothers. But “despite the conventional wisdom that nurturing is primarily mom’s territory, the root meaning of ‘nurture’ is ‘to protect’—a role that most dads are comfortable with.”
A dad’s love for his son doesn’t end with nurturing. One of the most crucial things is that of a son’s innate need to be affirmed by his own father. “Your affirmation prepares your son to enter the world with the confidence and ’emotional armor’ that he needs in order not just to survive, but to thrive,” explained Roland.
Telling your son how happy you are about him, not because of his accomplishments, but because of who he is as a person, is something every child greatly benefits from. Even when the relationship feels strained at times, and it’s normal if that happens, knowing that whatever happens, you have your father behind your back is one of the most valuable things any parent can bring their child.
And this is what people had to comment on the incident the anonymous dad posted on Reddit
313Kviews
Share on Facebookyou are right about the plague rats comment. But he is trying to be a Remy about it. A family that doesn't like you take responsability for your own kid,???
Load More Replies...I have a 17 year old who regularly hugs me and his dad and has a snuggle with us on the couch when watching TV. My mother never hugged me much so I now hug my own kids all I can and I encourage their father to do the same. I feel so sorry for her teenage daughter who must feel so alienated and unloved.
My husband’s mom was the same way towards him growing up. He has 2 brothers and his mom never hugged or kissed him or them. I’ve known him for 6 years and I’ve never seen her display any kind of affection towards him. We have a 2 1/2 year old and we are always hugging and kissing her and she’s started doing it back to us. It’s so cute. I know if we have a son I’ll do the same thing with him too. I’m sorry your mom was like that towards you.
Load More Replies...Well. We need more dads like you!!! I would LOVE to have a dad like this ahhhhh please just cut off that sister's words from your mind :/ My dad will never accept my identity, plus he thinks all my health issues are my own fault and then blames me for making him worry about it when I'm the one actually going through pain day and night
I'm sorry, your dad is an asshead and a bitch. We will accept you for who you are. lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender it is okay. you are you and no one and nothing will ever change that
Load More Replies...WTF, in no way is that creepy. I actually find it quite sad that she thinks like that.
I'd be proud to know/be related to him and his son!
Load More Replies...The first thing I found odd was the fact the family hasn't spoken to him because he took responsibility for his child. That is already toxic. Then the sister comes around only when she needed something and had the nerve to stick her nose into his parenting and gets mad when he finally says something. That's BS!!!! I agree she needs help, however she need to understand boundaries and if she does like it then she has to go.
The 16 year old should next time hug his crazy aunt and smother her with love. Seems like she needs it.
Family can be so toxic and it's sad because we do want a relationship with our family. He is raising his son the right way and his sister needs to get her mind outta the gutter. She would have been out of my house!
I completely agree with you here. Family is family and we should help family as needed. HOWEVER, the sister is a guest in HIS house. Just because she is older does not mean that she is ENTITLED to be RUDE and DISRESPECTFUL in HIS house. She is entitled to her opinion, she made it known, and she received HIS opinion on response - too bad she can't handle what she dishes out.The sheer audacity of his sister baffles me. She has the nerve to give her opinions on his parenting skills, although he took responsibility for his child, and obviously is raising his son right! His son is honest, open, loving. Yet her daughter is distant, uncommunicative and essentially rude. Her toxicity would not be tolerated in MY house.
Load More Replies...I've just turned 71: my son is 35 & he always hugs me when we meet and when we part. If anyone thinks that's creepy, that is due to the warped nature of their mind and nothing else.
Right? I'll be 40 this year and I hug and kiss my parents (closed lip on the mouth) , always have always will. These are the people that gave me my life, and made me the person I am today, and I do the same with my children and I pray every day when they are 40 (and beyond) they do the same to me
Load More Replies...you are right about the plague rats comment. But he is trying to be a Remy about it. A family that doesn't like you take responsability for your own kid,???
Load More Replies...I have a 17 year old who regularly hugs me and his dad and has a snuggle with us on the couch when watching TV. My mother never hugged me much so I now hug my own kids all I can and I encourage their father to do the same. I feel so sorry for her teenage daughter who must feel so alienated and unloved.
My husband’s mom was the same way towards him growing up. He has 2 brothers and his mom never hugged or kissed him or them. I’ve known him for 6 years and I’ve never seen her display any kind of affection towards him. We have a 2 1/2 year old and we are always hugging and kissing her and she’s started doing it back to us. It’s so cute. I know if we have a son I’ll do the same thing with him too. I’m sorry your mom was like that towards you.
Load More Replies...Well. We need more dads like you!!! I would LOVE to have a dad like this ahhhhh please just cut off that sister's words from your mind :/ My dad will never accept my identity, plus he thinks all my health issues are my own fault and then blames me for making him worry about it when I'm the one actually going through pain day and night
I'm sorry, your dad is an asshead and a bitch. We will accept you for who you are. lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender it is okay. you are you and no one and nothing will ever change that
Load More Replies...WTF, in no way is that creepy. I actually find it quite sad that she thinks like that.
I'd be proud to know/be related to him and his son!
Load More Replies...The first thing I found odd was the fact the family hasn't spoken to him because he took responsibility for his child. That is already toxic. Then the sister comes around only when she needed something and had the nerve to stick her nose into his parenting and gets mad when he finally says something. That's BS!!!! I agree she needs help, however she need to understand boundaries and if she does like it then she has to go.
The 16 year old should next time hug his crazy aunt and smother her with love. Seems like she needs it.
Family can be so toxic and it's sad because we do want a relationship with our family. He is raising his son the right way and his sister needs to get her mind outta the gutter. She would have been out of my house!
I completely agree with you here. Family is family and we should help family as needed. HOWEVER, the sister is a guest in HIS house. Just because she is older does not mean that she is ENTITLED to be RUDE and DISRESPECTFUL in HIS house. She is entitled to her opinion, she made it known, and she received HIS opinion on response - too bad she can't handle what she dishes out.The sheer audacity of his sister baffles me. She has the nerve to give her opinions on his parenting skills, although he took responsibility for his child, and obviously is raising his son right! His son is honest, open, loving. Yet her daughter is distant, uncommunicative and essentially rude. Her toxicity would not be tolerated in MY house.
Load More Replies...I've just turned 71: my son is 35 & he always hugs me when we meet and when we part. If anyone thinks that's creepy, that is due to the warped nature of their mind and nothing else.
Right? I'll be 40 this year and I hug and kiss my parents (closed lip on the mouth) , always have always will. These are the people that gave me my life, and made me the person I am today, and I do the same with my children and I pray every day when they are 40 (and beyond) they do the same to me
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