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“I Have No Money”: Single Mom Receives $150 Bill, Becomes The “Bad Guy” When She Refuses To Pay
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“I Have No Money”: Single Mom Receives $150 Bill, Becomes The “Bad Guy” When She Refuses To Pay

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How the bill gets paid at the end of a meal is a good test of just how close your friends actually are. We tend to not think that a handful of dollars can actually end a relationship, but some people are willing to die on this hill.

TikToker user and single mom Remiandaryan shared her frustration at a friend who pressured her into covering a $150 group dinner bill, despite her purposefully ordering less all evening. Commenters sided with her, arguing that a group of adults should be able to pay their own dinner bills at the end of the day.

More info: TikTok

A woman was shocked to learn that her friend wanted her to cover a group dinner bill

Image credits: remiandaryan

“You know, that guy who went to a birthday dinner, and he didn’t know anybody there and everybody was ordering really expensive stuff. So when he got up to go to the bathroom, he paid for his meal, went back to the table. Everybody’s arguing about the food. And he’s like, I already paid for my stuff. And his homegirl, his friend, later told him, that was so inappropriate. You embarrassed me, that was wrong. You’re rude for doing that. That happened to me.”

Image credits: remiandaryan

“This was like, a friend who modeled, she made a good amount of money. I didn’t know anybody else who was invited, but she invited me to her birthday dinner. So I went online, and I found a birthday coupon, buy one, get one free. It was a Brazilian all-you-can-eat steak house kind of thing. So it’s $50 upfront. Does not include drinks, does not include dessert. So I go, I have no money. I’m a single mom. I have no money. And I don’t know why she thought I ever had money. But I didn’t, like, I lived in a really nice house, like, a million-dollar home with a friend. But that was not my home. That was not my family. We have no blood ties. And so why she thought, just because I lived there, like, I had money? I don’t know. So we go to her apartment. And we’re getting ready for this birthday dinner. A few people show up. And this girl is showing me, she literally showed me her new chest that she had just paid for, cuz she models too. We get to the restaurant, a few people show up and a few people leave without paying.”

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Image credits: remiandaryan

“I assumed that they left money with her. But we’re eating, we’re having a good time, I order water. And I order no dessert. And while we’re eating, I get a piece of filet mignon that is so fatty, it just- like, it was so gross. I had to run to the bathroom. My friend calls over the manager while I’m in the bathroom. I’m in there for a minute, rinsing out my mouth. It was bad. I come out and he’s saying he’ll comp my meal. So I’m thinking, okay, so I’ll just pay the $25 for my friend, right? Wrong. They wanted me to pay $150. $150. When I just got the basic $50 meal. Plus I had the buy one get one free coupon, you know, to be used on me and the birthday girl. So it should have been $25 for her tops if I’m paying for her meal. But because those people left and did not pay for their meals, suddenly I’m supposed to float this bill. No, ma’am. I don’t know what happened. But I had to write a check to my friend because I didn’t even have the $50 in my account that I knew I needed a couple of days till my paycheck hit. So I just wrote her a check.”

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Image credits: Elina Sazonova (not the actual photo)

“I said I’m not paying any more than 50 because that’s not fair. She was irritated with me. She was definitely irritated with me. But this was not my thing. I am a single mom, you did not clear this. We did not talk about this. I did not eat that food. Why would you do this to me if you’re supposed to be my friend? I wish I had said that back then. But I really was a pushover when it came to her. And I didn’t say any of this. But I was the bad guy in the situation. She did this to me for her baby shower. She did this to me for so many other things.”

Image credits: Marc Majcher (not the actual photo)

“Knowing that I’m a single mom, and she has all these other friends that make so much more money. Why was I the one she picked? Never sit down to dinner with anybody, friend or otherwise, unless you’ve already talked about how it’s getting split, what your budget is, if you’re all going to split the bill equally, never sit down to eat with a group without first clearing that with everybody. And I would even go as far as in a big group, that if it’s going to be a $50 limit or $100 limit, that money better be cashed out to somebody in advance. So that person can pay the bill all on one tab. Or you call the restaurant up front for a large party so you all can have your separate bills. Like, duh.”

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Image credits: remiandaryan

You can watch the full video here

@remiandaryan I always ask before we even order how the bill will be handled or I dont order at all. #birthday #dinner #resturaunt #ettiquette #groupdinner #large #groups #fyp ♬ original sound – 🦕Raising Autistic🦖

OP might have to reconsider if she sees these folks as friends

Image credits: cottonbro studio (not the actual photo)

It might seem a bit strange that, in the 21st century, a group of adults, ostensibly with kids and jobs, struggle so much with the idea that there will be a bill at the end of the evening. This has legitimately been true since before any of us were born, yet, as this story demonstrates, some folks seem to be incapable of planning their budget a few hours in advance.

“Don’t spend money you don’t have” has been basic, fundamental financial advice since time immemorial. One of the great parts of having friends is that they can, in a pinch, actually help you get around this rule. After all, friends pay for friends all the time. This is particularly true if someone in the group is making more money than the rest. It’s not uncommon to celebrate financial success by taking your friends and loved ones out for drinks or a meal.

This, perhaps, demonstrates that the people in this story are hardly friends. The “birthday girl” could perhaps argue that her friend (OP) should have helped with the bill. However, would a “real” friend ever put someone they were close to in this situation in the first place? Furthermore, a friend should perhaps have some understanding of the financial situation of others. It almost seems like these people hardly know each other.

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In some cultures, it might be uncommon to split the bill

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Image credits: Alexey Demidov (not the actual photo)

What is even more strange, is the fact that this group of adults seems to have completely forgotten the norms and etiquette of dining out together in general. Generally, with birthdays, either everyone pays for the birthday boy or girl, or, the person, who invited everyone out, covers the bill for the whole table. Putting the entire bill on one guest is ridiculous unless they specifically requested to do so.

In the English-speaking world, everyone covering their own bill even has its own term, to go “Dutch.” This came from a negative, stereotypical belief that the Dutch were stingy, so to only cover your own bill could be seen as insulting in certain situations. While this phrase comes from the UK, it’s worth noting that the English, apparently, didn’t have the best reputation for generosity, for example, in Egypt, one might say that they will go “English style,” i.e. split the bill.

However, some researchers have noted that the prevalence of apps, such as Venmo, has shifted how people approach paying. Hading around cash was and still is a bit uncomfortable, plus many people simply don’t carry that much cash on hand. However, with an app, you can always text your dinner companions later for their part of the bill. Restaurants generally like this arrangement as well, as it makes payment easier and creates less work for the waitstaff.

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The real issue here was the entitled expectations

Image credits: Chan Walrus (not the actual photo)

In much of Europe, the bill isn’t split at the restaurant and either the group owes a person who covers it, or they pay them later. However, tourism does have its own effects, for example, in Italy, when people split the bill, they might say that they will “pagare alla romana,” or “to pay Roman-style.”

However, the issue here isn’t some cultural misunderstanding. Remiandaryan was the guest at a birthday dinner. Almost nowhere is there an expectation that a random guest will pick up the entire tab, particularly if they very purposefully ordered less? Hopefully, at least, this experience and the many supportive comments can serve as an eye-opener for the future.

Viewers expressed their support for Remiandaryan

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hjsayen avatar
Bowtechie
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Even with the coupon, if you were so broke, why did you even go? An invitation is not an obligation, especially when it seems like you barely knew the person in the first place. Yeah, obviously being expected to pay for those who essentially dined and dashed sucks, but with all the context she gave in the beginning, I fail to see her logic in going in the first place.

dremetrius avatar
dremetrius
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It sounds like she didn't even have enough for her own??? "But I had to write a check to my friend because I didn’t even have the $50 in my account that I knew I needed a couple of days till my paycheck hit. So I just wrote her a check."

Load More Replies...
equine_job avatar
Anony Mouse
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Okay, but is she a single mom? I'm unclear on that. Unfortunately she chose to shove a camera into her giant face and complain about it online instead of being mature enough to turn down an invitation she couldn't afford. Don't have $50 in the bank? Don't go out to dinner. Terrible, boring tiktok content. Whiners with giant filter-faces. Please Bored Panda - stop posting these.

rosalie_dann avatar
Rosalie Dann
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She had worked out a way she COULD afford, with the use of a coupon, to pay for HER meal and perhaps her friend's. NOT EVERYONE. Yes, she said she was a single Mum.

Load More Replies...
swastimukti avatar
Cooking Panda
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Is this a cultural thing in America? I've read similar stories before. Where I live, the host pays for everything. If you can't afford it, then don't throw a party! Also when eating out with friends, everyone pays their own meal. Unless someone's being generous and pays more so that someone else can pay less.

monicayoung avatar
Mona
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Put away the TikTok and either talk to your friend or break up with them. No need for TikTok passive aggressiveness to be involved.

balbicky avatar
Milan
Community Member
3 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Poor friendships & relationships management. Never had, have, will have this type of friends near me. Classic reddit/tiktok/BP copy-paste story, which happens almost never 😁

marneederider40 avatar
Marnie
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is very simple. The people who left without paying are THIEVES. The OP pays for her bill, and uses her coupon for the friend, and that's that. She's not on the hook for the other people. They walked out without paying. Let the restaurant call the police and report it, since they are thieves.

sonja_6 avatar
Sonja
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I live in Europe and splitting bills is standard, not the other way round. It's expected that if someone pays for all, they announce that. This strange custom to split the bill equally so some people can gorge themselves on other people's tabs is a US invention. A German will for sure ask for an individual bill. And that other eu countries act differently is new to me, and I work in an international company were colleagues often go out to eat together. And there are those miraculous little machines I've seen in most restaurants around here, that allow to enter several different taps per table, so the bill is split right away, and the server only has to take the cash or let everyone tap their cards on the portable card reader that's also already integrated in those miraculous little machines. Some Restaurants also already have Google pay or Apple pay ready, and once or twice even PayPal was an option. So if restaurants want faster checkouts, all they have to do is buy them.

l_r_beauchamp avatar
Lori Beauchamp
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Can you imagine the privilege of having free public education and THIS is how communication is expressed?

eriktater avatar
Erik Tater
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She's a single mom with an empty bank account who lets herself get peer pressured into paying for a plastic Instagram model's meals? Ok. That's absurd. Also if the place was $50 per person, then $150 isn't paying for the whole group.

shead26 avatar
Steve
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

A group of models going to an all-you-can eat meat buffet restaurant? Smells like BS to me

laurabamber avatar
The Starsong Princess
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Your so called friend has a sucker in you. You were invited just in case she needed to stick someone with the bill. It’s really hard to push back in the moment and this kind of people rely on that. So for next time, rehearse pushing back and say no in the mirror. Also ask for a separate check before ordering.

rosalie_dann avatar
Rosalie Dann
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I am not paying for others to heavily imbibe. Had that issue for a while with work Social Club until I spoke up and said I didn't think that those of us who didn't drink should have to subsidize those who do.

rwtnuhkielf7 avatar
HTakeover
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Dictated text from a TikTok is usually tough, but damn that was not an easy read; restarts, rehashes, sentence breaks, etc.

laurasmith_8 avatar
laura smith
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Good lord, could you possibly get that camera any closer to your face? Yikes, why did you need so many ridiculous selfies to tell this story?

guineveremariesmith avatar
Gwyn
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It sounds like this "friend" has done this before. So why did she even go this time? That friendship should have ended the first time that happened.

roccomz avatar
Rocco MZ
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Man, I couldn't be happier my friends aren't petty a******s like this.

adrianawise8 avatar
ImaPerson
Community Member
2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't understand why everyone can't just pay for their own food?

impossiblekat avatar
KatSaidWhat
Community Member
2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm the person asking for split bill, or at least mine separate because sometimes I'm just there for company and not eating. But have always stated this upfront, as have others. I don't go out with a particular big group anymore because they love ordering stuff "for the table", and bottles of wine and then expecting people to pay. One suck big lunch one day, someone arrived really late and had a soup - was expected to pay £40. Nah, Felicia. There have been times when I did split the bill providing I too have had my snout in the trough.

inglourioustmnt avatar
Inglourioustmnt
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I always do separate bills. Ive never had a group be like lets split the bill. Its no effort for the waiter and im not subsidizing your food.

dawn_bodtke avatar
Dawn Bodtke
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

We used to got out as a big group every payday. We had one friend that somehow could remember who ordered what. At the end she would verify the bill, give each of us an amount and we all paid and threw tips in Wherever you are Rockstar Jeth, I miss you!

dawn_bodtke avatar
Dawn Bodtke
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

We used to go out for drinks appies every payday. We had one friend that could remember anything anyone ordered, tally each persons bill+tip and give us each an amount. It was perfect. Where ever you are rockstar Jeth, I miss you!

adammichael_1 avatar
Adam Michael
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As a society we should be evolved enough to know a "tiktoker" is a liar.

jdegyansky avatar
Joe Momma
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"I have no money" proceeds to order a 50 dollar meal for themselves. No you are the bad guy even if you didn't pay for everyone else. As someone raised by a single mother this makes me sick.

kayrose avatar
Roan The Demon Kitty
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

maybe... just maybe, don't agree to go out for expensive meals if you're broke? $50 dollars for a meal is ridiculous. I know places I can get a meal for less than £10 ($12.60), so knowing your broke and deciding to spend $50 on a meal is completely on OP here. She should maybe focus on more important things than filet mignon.

marneederider40 avatar
Marnie
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

A basic meal is not $50. That's a fancy, expensive meal. I think I've seen a menu with entrees over $20 twice in my life, both times being this past year.

hjsayen avatar
Bowtechie
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Even with the coupon, if you were so broke, why did you even go? An invitation is not an obligation, especially when it seems like you barely knew the person in the first place. Yeah, obviously being expected to pay for those who essentially dined and dashed sucks, but with all the context she gave in the beginning, I fail to see her logic in going in the first place.

dremetrius avatar
dremetrius
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It sounds like she didn't even have enough for her own??? "But I had to write a check to my friend because I didn’t even have the $50 in my account that I knew I needed a couple of days till my paycheck hit. So I just wrote her a check."

Load More Replies...
equine_job avatar
Anony Mouse
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Okay, but is she a single mom? I'm unclear on that. Unfortunately she chose to shove a camera into her giant face and complain about it online instead of being mature enough to turn down an invitation she couldn't afford. Don't have $50 in the bank? Don't go out to dinner. Terrible, boring tiktok content. Whiners with giant filter-faces. Please Bored Panda - stop posting these.

rosalie_dann avatar
Rosalie Dann
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She had worked out a way she COULD afford, with the use of a coupon, to pay for HER meal and perhaps her friend's. NOT EVERYONE. Yes, she said she was a single Mum.

Load More Replies...
swastimukti avatar
Cooking Panda
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Is this a cultural thing in America? I've read similar stories before. Where I live, the host pays for everything. If you can't afford it, then don't throw a party! Also when eating out with friends, everyone pays their own meal. Unless someone's being generous and pays more so that someone else can pay less.

monicayoung avatar
Mona
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Put away the TikTok and either talk to your friend or break up with them. No need for TikTok passive aggressiveness to be involved.

balbicky avatar
Milan
Community Member
3 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Poor friendships & relationships management. Never had, have, will have this type of friends near me. Classic reddit/tiktok/BP copy-paste story, which happens almost never 😁

marneederider40 avatar
Marnie
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is very simple. The people who left without paying are THIEVES. The OP pays for her bill, and uses her coupon for the friend, and that's that. She's not on the hook for the other people. They walked out without paying. Let the restaurant call the police and report it, since they are thieves.

sonja_6 avatar
Sonja
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I live in Europe and splitting bills is standard, not the other way round. It's expected that if someone pays for all, they announce that. This strange custom to split the bill equally so some people can gorge themselves on other people's tabs is a US invention. A German will for sure ask for an individual bill. And that other eu countries act differently is new to me, and I work in an international company were colleagues often go out to eat together. And there are those miraculous little machines I've seen in most restaurants around here, that allow to enter several different taps per table, so the bill is split right away, and the server only has to take the cash or let everyone tap their cards on the portable card reader that's also already integrated in those miraculous little machines. Some Restaurants also already have Google pay or Apple pay ready, and once or twice even PayPal was an option. So if restaurants want faster checkouts, all they have to do is buy them.

l_r_beauchamp avatar
Lori Beauchamp
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Can you imagine the privilege of having free public education and THIS is how communication is expressed?

eriktater avatar
Erik Tater
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She's a single mom with an empty bank account who lets herself get peer pressured into paying for a plastic Instagram model's meals? Ok. That's absurd. Also if the place was $50 per person, then $150 isn't paying for the whole group.

shead26 avatar
Steve
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

A group of models going to an all-you-can eat meat buffet restaurant? Smells like BS to me

laurabamber avatar
The Starsong Princess
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Your so called friend has a sucker in you. You were invited just in case she needed to stick someone with the bill. It’s really hard to push back in the moment and this kind of people rely on that. So for next time, rehearse pushing back and say no in the mirror. Also ask for a separate check before ordering.

rosalie_dann avatar
Rosalie Dann
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I am not paying for others to heavily imbibe. Had that issue for a while with work Social Club until I spoke up and said I didn't think that those of us who didn't drink should have to subsidize those who do.

rwtnuhkielf7 avatar
HTakeover
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Dictated text from a TikTok is usually tough, but damn that was not an easy read; restarts, rehashes, sentence breaks, etc.

laurasmith_8 avatar
laura smith
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Good lord, could you possibly get that camera any closer to your face? Yikes, why did you need so many ridiculous selfies to tell this story?

guineveremariesmith avatar
Gwyn
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It sounds like this "friend" has done this before. So why did she even go this time? That friendship should have ended the first time that happened.

roccomz avatar
Rocco MZ
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Man, I couldn't be happier my friends aren't petty a******s like this.

adrianawise8 avatar
ImaPerson
Community Member
2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't understand why everyone can't just pay for their own food?

impossiblekat avatar
KatSaidWhat
Community Member
2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm the person asking for split bill, or at least mine separate because sometimes I'm just there for company and not eating. But have always stated this upfront, as have others. I don't go out with a particular big group anymore because they love ordering stuff "for the table", and bottles of wine and then expecting people to pay. One suck big lunch one day, someone arrived really late and had a soup - was expected to pay £40. Nah, Felicia. There have been times when I did split the bill providing I too have had my snout in the trough.

inglourioustmnt avatar
Inglourioustmnt
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I always do separate bills. Ive never had a group be like lets split the bill. Its no effort for the waiter and im not subsidizing your food.

dawn_bodtke avatar
Dawn Bodtke
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

We used to got out as a big group every payday. We had one friend that somehow could remember who ordered what. At the end she would verify the bill, give each of us an amount and we all paid and threw tips in Wherever you are Rockstar Jeth, I miss you!

dawn_bodtke avatar
Dawn Bodtke
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

We used to go out for drinks appies every payday. We had one friend that could remember anything anyone ordered, tally each persons bill+tip and give us each an amount. It was perfect. Where ever you are rockstar Jeth, I miss you!

adammichael_1 avatar
Adam Michael
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As a society we should be evolved enough to know a "tiktoker" is a liar.

jdegyansky avatar
Joe Momma
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"I have no money" proceeds to order a 50 dollar meal for themselves. No you are the bad guy even if you didn't pay for everyone else. As someone raised by a single mother this makes me sick.

kayrose avatar
Roan The Demon Kitty
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

maybe... just maybe, don't agree to go out for expensive meals if you're broke? $50 dollars for a meal is ridiculous. I know places I can get a meal for less than £10 ($12.60), so knowing your broke and deciding to spend $50 on a meal is completely on OP here. She should maybe focus on more important things than filet mignon.

marneederider40 avatar
Marnie
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

A basic meal is not $50. That's a fancy, expensive meal. I think I've seen a menu with entrees over $20 twice in my life, both times being this past year.

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