Woman Questions Bf’s Masculinity After His New Purchase, He Questions Their Entire Relationship

Even in this progressive day and age, traditional roles and notions persist for each gender. There are general expectations of how men and women should act and dress, and those who subscribe to them will likely remain unchallenged. 

Some may argue that these are outdated standards, but it nonetheless became a problem for this couple. The man decided to meet up with his girlfriend wearing a shawl, prompting her to question his masculinity. 

The man later revealed that his partner broke up with him, all because of a piece of fabric often associated with femininity.

Couples can break up over the most inane reasons

Young woman looking confused while sitting at a table, reflecting on guys deciding to buy shawls and reactions.

Image credits: seleznev_photos / envato (not the actual photo)

This couple ended up calling it quits because the man met up with his girlfriend wearing a shawl

Text about a guy with a tough background wearing a shawl and facing reactions from girlfriends calling him gay.

Text describing guys deciding to buy shawls that their girlfriends call them gay, highlighting cool and awesome shawls.

Guys wearing shawls face girlfriends calling them gay after buying shawls and going out to a dive bar with friends.

Man wears shawl causing girlfriend to question his sexuality and express concerns before apologizing later via text.

Man wearing a striped shawl taking a mirror selfie with a smartphone in a bathroom doorway.

Image credits: filterface

The man later revealed that the same thing happened to his “Shawlbro”

Text message describing a guy’s girlfriend calling him gay after he wore a shawl, sparking a relationship issue.

Text excerpt about guys deciding to buy shawls despite girlfriends calling them gay, mentioning warmth and style.

Text post about guys buying cursed shawls and facing reactions from their girlfriends calling them gay.

He also included a photo of his friend wearing a shawl

Man wearing a shawl indoors smiling while standing next to a plant in a hallway with wooden flooring.

Image credits: filterface

The strict adherence to traditional gender roles is often a byproduct of being overly attached to one’s identity 

The man didn’t provide enough information about his girlfriend, but she seems to be too attached to the idea and definition of her “kind of man.” According to researcher, author, and Thought Method Company founder Lyndsey Getty, one reason could be that the person is too attached to their own identity. 

“A woman who lives in a world where she was told she is made to breed children and take care of a man since she was born, and now has children and keeps a home, may have her entire identity wrapped around her gender roles,” she told Bored Panda, adding that making an entire identity shift is challenging because she likely wasn’t taught how to go about it. 

Therapist and relationship coach Rich Heller shared a similar sentiment, saying people may use gender roles as an “unconscious blueprint” for love and what a partnership “should look like.” 

That’s when it becomes a problem. Heller says when couples agree on these gender roles, the simplicity and straightforwardness may come at the cost of authenticity. In the story, the man’s self-expression was challenged. As a result, the woman chose to withdraw from the relationship instead of engaging in a conversation. 

“The rigidity makes intimacy impossible,” Heller said. 

While such situations may seem impossible to navigate, Getty says a good first step would be to assess if it’s a dynamic that you want. As she noted, “making concessions in relationships is healthy, abandoning yourself is not.” 

However, if you must discuss it, Heller advises focusing on values rather than surface traits. Ask your partner where their expectations are coming from, and express precisely what you need to feel seen and understood. 

“But if your partner can’t or won’t grow with you, it’s okay to let go. You deserve to be with someone who embraces you as you are—not just the version that fits their script,” he stated.

Based on the author’s story, the problem shifted from something trivial to him feeling disrespected. The breakup may have been silly, but at that point, the relationship seemed far from salvageable.

People in the comments offered messages of support for the author

Screenshot of a Reddit conversation with users making puns about guys buying shawls and their girlfriends' reactions.

Screenshot of a social media comment reacting to guys deciding to buy shawls and their girlfriends calling them gay.

Google Trends graph showing rising interest over time for shawls across various US states including Washington and Nebraska.

Comment about guys buying shawls and their girlfriends teasing them by calling them gay in an online discussion thread.

Comment text discussing sayings about practicality and confidence, related to guys buying shawls and their girlfriends calling them gay.

Comment mentioning the word shawl as being heard or seen the most in a single day.

Comment discussing shawls with excitement and envy about their style, comparing them to wild west ponchos.

Reddit users joking about guys buying shawls and their girlfriends teasing them for wearing shawls and calling them gay.

Comment on buying shawls with girlfriends calling guys gay, expressing pride in choosing a cool shawl despite teasing.

Comment supporting guys buying shawls despite girlfriends calling them gay, promoting confidence and identity over stereotypes.

Screenshot of a Reddit comment discussing girlfriends reacting negatively to guys buying shawls and calling them gay.

ALT text: Reddit comment encouraging guys to wear shawls confidently despite girlfriends calling them gay, promoting self-expression and individuality.

Commenter discussing how shawls challenge assumptions about sexual preference based on clothing choices in 2019.

Two guys shopping for shawls while their girlfriends react with surprise and teasing comments.

Alt text: Online discussion about guys buying shawls and their girlfriends calling them gay, highlighting masculinity and relationship views.

Comment discussing guys buying shawls, addressing cultural norms and reactions from their girlfriends calling them gay.

Two guys shopping for shawls while their girlfriends react and call them gay in a casual market setting.

Comment discussing guys buying shawls and their girlfriends calling them gay in a humorous online post.

Screenshot of a Reddit comment discussing girls' reactions to guys buying shawls and mentioning Israeli Middle Eastern military style.

Screenshot of a comment discussing guys buying shawls and their girlfriends calling them gay with a sarcastic tone.

Comment discussing wearing shawls and cultural differences between the East and West coasts of the US.

Comment discussing harsh reactions toward a girl’s aesthetic and attraction, and misunderstandings in communication.

Screenshot of an online comment saying You gay brah in response to guys buying shawls.

Comment discussing how guys buying shawls face judgment from girlfriends linking shawls to being gay.

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